2 dyslexics run into a bank and shout:

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?

A stick.

Last week I was driving through town, when all of a sudden I spotted a police car in the mirror. I stepped on the pedal, but could get rid of it, going through town at 90 miles an hour. Went through side streets, crashed market stands, along screaming people, but just couldn't lose them.

Than finally, just when I thought I had succeeded,... road block.

After they pulled me out of my car and slammed me on the hood, the officer asked: "Why the heck did you drive through town like that???"

I said: "Well,... my wife ran off with a police guy last week and I was affraid you were coming to bring her back!"

*disclaimer: No people, police men, market stands or vegetables were harmed in this joke. If however you recognise yourself in this joke, please contact your local S.G.A.U.V.J.P.P.M.V.J.G.L.P (Support Group Against the Use of People, Police men, Market Stands and Vegetables in Jokes on GodLike Productions) or call 0900 -S.G.A.U.V.J.P.P.M.V.J.G.L.P. ($1.60 per minute, plus the use of your mobile phone.)

A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen. Ugh!" The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!" The man says: "You go right up there and tell him off – go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

Last week I was arrested for a comment I made against the mounted police.

I said to this police guy: "What a strange horse!" He asked: "What do you mean?" I replied: "Well, normally the dick is hanging underneath the horse, but with this one it is right on top!"

Talking about penquins:

Last week I picked up 3 penguins that were walking along the highway.
I went to the nearest gas station and asked what I should do with them.
The attendant said: "Take em to the zoo!"
"Great idea!" I replied and drove off.

Next day I arrived at the same gas station and the attendant noticed the penguins in the back seat.
He said: "I thought you were going to take them to the zoo??"
I replied: "Well, I sure did. They loved it! Today we are going to the beach!"

I was having dinner with the World Chess Champion the other night,and there was a checkered tablecloth. It took him two hours to pass me the salt.

LOLOLOLOL!

AC 28, good job!

Funny how?

Dyslexics have problems with visual cues not an inability to reproduce visual errors as sloemn errors.

Don't give up your day job.

Humor often reveals our conceptions—and misconceptions—of the world, and few psychological conditions are the butt of as many jokes as dyslexia: "I'm an agnostic dyslexic with insomnia. I lay awake all night trying to work out if there really is a Dog." Or: "Dyslexics of the world, untie!"

Yet to people with dyslexia, these jokes aren't especially funny. Not only do they poke fun at people with a serious disability, they also reinforce inaccurate stereotypes of people with a genuine psychological condition and underscore just how distant the public's conception of dyslexia is from reality.

[link to www.psychologicalscience.org]

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back?

A stick.

I was having dinner with the World Chess Champion the other night,and there was a checkered tablecloth. It took him two hours to pass me the salt.

Calm the hell down, I have dyslexia and I found it hilarious. Do you have any idea how long it takes me to write a post? If you can't laugh at yourself, then life isn't worth living.

Anyway...people with a bad case of dyslexia wouldn't get the joke anyway. The punchline would read normal to them.

AC36....you r funny, hehe! Thanks.

If 1 out of 10 people suffer from diarrhea, does that mean the other 9 enjoy it?