Godlike Productions - Conspiracy Forum
Users Online Now: 2,463 (Who's On?)Visitors Today: 2,707,495
Pageviews Today: 3,701,851Threads Today: 731Posts Today: 16,853
11:55 PM


Rate this Thread

Absolute BS Crap Reasonable Nice Amazing
 

Gay Couple Accepts Responsibility For Every Major Disaster of the Last 50 Years

 
Mordier L'eft
Offer Upgrade

User ID: 28021884
Canada
11/18/2012 08:28 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Gay Couple Accepts Responsibility For Every Major Disaster of the Last 50 Years
Following the destruction caused by Hurricane Sandy, a homosexual couple in Suffolk have stepped forward to take responsibility for the event and countless others before it.

Chris Green, 43, approached the media after US preacher John McTernan suggested that the hurricane was a direct result of acceptance of gay marriage and confirmed that it was in fact correct that the actions of himself and his partner, Phil Stevens, were to blame.

“There was no use pretending any more. Phil and I making love has been the cause of every major disaster of recent years. Hurricane Sandy, Katrina, the Boxing Day tsunami, the Paris Hilton movie The Hottie and the Nottie. Those were all our fault. We don’t know how it happens, but, as always, those radical evangelists were right on the money.”

When asked to comment, McTernan was found to be confused and irritable:

“I wasn’t even believing my own bullshit at this stage. Hell, it goes down great with the rednecks, but I never thought I was right.”

In relation to claims that McTernan linked Hurricane Isaac earlier this year to simultaneous LGBT proceedings in New Orleans, the preacher said:

“Look, man, I’m just clutching at straws. I had to blame someone, I’m way out of my league here. I can’t accuse illiterate trailer trash with 18 kids on benefits, that’s my fanbase.”

Mr Green and Mr Stevens have been together 20 years, and regret all the harm they have caused in that time:

“We’re both very sorry we neglected to tell anyone for so long. We know it’s very selfish,” said Green. “The first time we kissed in the street a dog got hit by a car. The first time I gave Phil a handjob, back in 1994, it kick-started a civil war in Yemen. Everything started in Libya that weekend we spent at a hotel in Tenerife. It’s a hassle, but we’ve just got to live with it.”

[link to www.wessexscene.co.uk]
--"In this era of great big brains anything that can happen will. So hunker down." -- Kurt Vonnegut, JR. -- Galapagos.
Mordier L'eft (OP)

User ID: 28021884
Canada
11/18/2012 08:42 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Gay Couple Accepts Responsibility For Every Major Disaster of the Last 50 Years
bananasex
--"In this era of great big brains anything that can happen will. So hunker down." -- Kurt Vonnegut, JR. -- Galapagos.
Dr. AculaModerator
Forum Moderator

User ID: 6860
United States
11/18/2012 08:42 PM

Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Gay Couple Accepts Responsibility For Every Major Disaster of the Last 50 Years
admitting ones wrong doings is the first step

cruise
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27881645
United States
11/18/2012 08:56 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Gay Couple Accepts Responsibility For Every Major Disaster of the Last 50 Years
With porcupines... the pricks are on the outside.
-
User ID: 14012564
United States
11/18/2012 09:02 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Gay Couple Accepts Responsibility For Every Major Disaster of the Last 50 Years
They admit to being ministers of Satan?

Where can we send the storm damage bill?

News