Contrary to popular belief by alot of Christians .....this isn't a good life or existence in general.....

Every now and then you will find a tiny gold nugget when panning for gold but most of the time it's just grimy mud,rocks ,dirt and fools gold...fools gold are the things that happen in life that at first seem like a blessing but end up being a unbearable trial

Jesus said.....paraphrasing......in this life you will experience hardships and trails but don't fear for I have overcome the world

The truth is that whether you're a Christian or not.....satan is the king of this society and this society is evil ....

I'm a Christian and I don't care to much for this life but I realize that it's for a purpose that I don't fully understand

I do my best to be thankful for the small things I do have like ....eyesight...use of my limbs .....my ears ....a roof over my head ....food in the fridge and clothes on my back because they are millions of people in this existence that don't have some of these things

but......I can't wait until this part of my existence is over and I get to experience a life without the pain ,misery and suffering that life has shown me in abundance

the things that make some people happy like partying on the weekend....casual sex .....fame ....money....etc....etc....leaves me feeling completely empty inside so I've stopped looking to those things to make me happy .....they seem to make a lot of people happy but not me and even tho I've never experienced fame ...I had experienced the other ones in abundance....I have had amazing sexual experiences in my life....from talking to other people , I think I have experienced pleasurable sex on a level that the majority of people never get to experience but in the end I was still empty inside

I eventually married a young girl from my church ...and it turned out that she was a habitual liar ...we ended up divorced and life has seemed like a nightmare ever since

I turned to drugs , booze and alcohol and nothing worked ....I still felt miserable inside ...

living for The Lord doesn't make life easy for me in my flesh....I suffer with depression and mood swings a lot but I have a peace on my soul ...i realize that every human life comes to an end ...that this life is temporary and that no one can argue that ....that's when I truly realized that my existence isn't about this life ...if it was then it wouldn't end....therefore my existence is about the next one....the eternal one and that I can deal with the pain of this life because I know that it will end...it has to because all human life in this reality we call "life" comes to and end

now I just keep my hand on the plow and I keep pushing forward .....trying my best to keep faith in God and continue in his Word and grow because Jesus said this......by this ye shall know that these are my disciples , that they continue in my Word