as a Poor Man from Brazil can some Americans please describe in great detail the food, alcohol and drugs you will consume this Thanksgiving

No matter what happens tomorrow I will not be fucking a Brazilian girl. You should feel lucky

We totally believe that you can afford internet, but not food.

3 beer but no orange stuffed turky.

I have no oven.

Nice data mining ploy you douchebag!!!!!

I eat only the most succulant meat and drink only the finest of whines.
I smoke only the most well-made cuban cigars.

South America has the most epic span of nutrient rich forest right at your doorstep. Why does anyone there need to starve? Cant you like...you know...Grow something?

no drugs or alcohol just thanking God for all we have.

me too, and watching sports

just thanking god i'm not in some dirt bag shithold like brazil..

I will eat so much that it will make me sleepy. Our family makes a shit ton of food. I will think of the poor as I swallow enough calories for a family of 8. Ramen!

You're not from Brazil.

why don't you just do a google image search for 'delicious thanksgiving food' and salivate to it.

Too bad you can't spell 'wine' for someone that has an expensive palate.

Well, I am indeed from Brazil...

Se for brazuca, manda um joinha ae cunpadi!

PS: The last phrase is in portuguese(the language spoken in Brazil) full of slangs, that's the only way I can be sure he is really from Brazil...

I was going to have Twinkies yada, yada yada.

I like my own dressing, and gravy. Pumpkin Pie and Pecan Pie. Odules beer and Diet Pepsi for the kids.
Drugs, Alka Seltzer. Maybe a little Beano to start off the meal.

I am going to fast. Dedicated to God. And you.

Here you go, bon appetite!

Black jumbo olives, pimento-stuffed queen green olives, chilled green onion stalks, hot banana peppers, sweet gherkin pickles

Herb & butter basted slow-roasted hen turkey (baked w/apple & onion)

Rubbed sage herb dressing with pecans, celery, vidalia onion, scallions, and portebella mushrooms (toasted on top)

Homemade mashed Russet potatoes (skins on) mixed with garlic, butter, and sour cream and covered in roasted turkey gravy

Ginger and cinnamon spiced yams simmered in brown sugar, butter, and a dash of fresh orange juice with a generous covering of toasted marshmallows on top

Green peas with pearl onions and butter

Hot flakey layered biscuits with butter and clover honey

Chilled cranberry sauce made from fresh berries

Mimosas to drink: Asti Spumanti champagne with fresh-squeezed orange juice

Homemade pecan pie made with 2 pounds of fresh pecans folded into brown sugar, caro syrup, fresh eggs, real vanilla, and butter in a flakey pastry shell

Breyer's natural vanilla bean icecream on the pie

Yuban coffee with hazelnut creamer

Now that was just plain mean!

I must admit that my family eats well because my husband is in the food industry and we are both great cooks, but the traditional Thanksgiving dinner is one I could do without. I make it, of course, because everyone else likes it. But turkey - meh. Stuffing - meh. The sweet potatoes are too sweet, the cranberries to strong-tasting, the green bean casserole and pumpkin pie are to gag for. I don't eat gluten so the bread is out. Basically, I eat the potatoes, the relish tray, the scalloped corn, and the inside of the pecan pie. Then I have to look at turkey leftovers for two or three days. You really aren't missing anything, OP.

And when you drink beer you only drink Dos Equis!

Eu falo portugues fluentemente, e o que você escreveu não parece ser portuguese do Brasil

o que é isso?

tambem, qualquer brasileiro iria escrever 'Brasil', não 'Brazil'..

desculpe camarada, eu não te acredito

Como a minha avozinha dizia: 'Isso é conversa atoa para boi dormir'

i feel so jealous of your lives, i so poor here in brazil i cross thanksgiving off the calander and pretend it does not exist

Well, it doesn't exist in Brazil. No pretend needed.

But, if it makes you feel any better, we're having a very simple meal. Turkey, dressing, rice, candied sweet potatoes, baby peas, turkey brown gravy. I'm about to start early preps now.

My turkys are marinading in a salt brine. ( 3 bottles Guinness. One bottle barley syrup, portobello mushrooms, onions, onions salt and vermouth.)with the turkey well have fresh made rolls, mashed taters, broccoli casserole, fresh cranberry sauce, Brussels sprouts, shredded bread stuffing , gravy and lots of wine,scotch and beer! Followed buy cherry apple and or pumpkin pie

Oh and I smoke the turkeys slow cooked for 5 hours

For such a poor man u might want to pawn or sale the computer ur using and stop paying the internet bill to save a poor man some money.

Go to nearest Catholic Church, they open them and feed everyone for Thanksgiving, or nearest Ruscue Mission!

to celebrate thanksgiving im flying to brazil to have relations with many disreputable women. perhaps even a soccer player. then im going to ingest some cocaine and then puke, eat, puke, and finally eat while using national geographic pictures of naked tribesmen as napkins.

sure, why not

we'll be having a plump, oven-roasted turkey breast

homemade gravy

homemade mashed potatoes with butter, milk, salt & pepper and secret ingredient (no, not sour cream or cream cheese)

baked sweet potatoes served with butter and cinnamon-sugar

homemade creamed corn (crock pot) - frozen corn, butter, cream cheese, milk, a little sugar, s&p

classic green bean casserole

cornbread stuffing - cornbread, sauteed onion & celery, spices, broth

crescent rolls

jellied cranberries

and

ambrosia - mandarins, pineapple, coconut, marshmallows, sour cream

cream cheese pumpkin pie - a delicious cream cheese layer under a luscious pumpkin pie layer, served with whipped cream

we used to also have glazed carrots but i didn't bother this year as only two people ever eat it

oh and

my daughter was with me at the store and talked me into a shrimp platter appetizer thing so we'll have that earlier in the day