Online alien contact and alien channeling jokes

Whats wrong with the probe theys just checkng your health

They want to probe backside intelligence.

From your point of view you are right. However, you are spiritually not far enough developed. That´s why you believe this. As an advice for you: do not gerneralize and judge. This would be at least a little step in the right direction on your long spiritual path.

Are you channeling aliens ? Are their names
hagel and valgua ?

That's why I quit watching t.v. Too many aliens on the channels. Internet much better.

One curious note :

Aliens took this man , anal proved him the worst part of the ordeal ....

they use the same prove unwashed to prove his mouth ...

his aftertaste of shitty mouth lasted for a month ...

If it was immaginary it goes away fast ....

If real last & last & last ! like trident gum ...

Anal prove Finger licking GOOD!

He hee

you are simply ignorant and narrow minded, thread end.

These people were "spiritually developed"? I'd just call them stupid and gullible.


"The prophecy came from Dorothy Martin (1900–1992), a Chicago housewife who experimented with automatic writing. She had previously been involved with L. Ron Hubbard's Dianetics movement, and her cult incorporated ideas from what was to become Scientology.

The group of believers, headed by Keech, had taken strong behavioral steps to indicate their degree of commitment to the belief. They had left jobs, college, and spouses, and had given away money and possessions to prepare for their departure on a flying saucer which was to rescue the group of true believers. She claimed to have received a message from a fictional planet named Clarion. These messages revealed that the world would end in a great flood before dawn on December 21, 1954.

After the failure of the prediction, she left Chicago after being threatened with arrest and psychiatric commitment. She later founded the Association of Sananda and Samat Kumara. Under the name Sister Thedra, she continued to practice channeling and to participate in contactee groups until her death in 1992. The Association is active to this day."
[link to en.wikipedia.org]

No. I channel Jesus Christ since more than 15 years. Only because Hagel and Valuga are fakes it does not mean that all channelings are fakes. Use your heart to feel the messages. Then you will know what is true or false.

What does Jesus say you ?
Worship me else you wil go to hell ?

Where are the Hagel and Valgua fans hiding ?

Hagel and Valgua walk into a bar and sit down on either side of a biker. Then they push their fingers into the biker's shoulders and say: "bloop, bloop, bloop"!

The biker looks at them and says," If you do that again I will cut your heads off with this knife!"

Hagel and Valgua push his shoulders again and say "bloop, bloop, bloop"! In anger the biker cuts off their heads and immediately another one grows back. Then Hagel and Valgua push their fingers into the biker's shoulders again and say: "bloop, bloop, bloop"!

The biker warns them, "if you do that again I will cut off your *privates*"! Hagel and Valgua do it again so in his anger the biker pulls down Hagel and Valgua's pants and is shocked to see they have no *privates*!! In his astonishment he asks,"How the hell do you have sex?"

Hagel and Valgua push their fingers into the biker's shoulders and say," bloop, bloop, bloop!"