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fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road

 
scared the shit out of me
User ID: 28386854
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11/27/2012 02:01 AM
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fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
driving home from work on I-10 and there was this goat sitting in the road 1dunno1

that sumofabitch was just standing there sleeping or something

i have half a mind to go back and run him over

after i was wondering what a goat would do to my truck at 70mph
i bet itd be like a speed bump

i swerved and miss the little bugger damned
Butt Pincher

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11/27/2012 02:13 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
driving home from work on I-10 and there was this goat sitting in the road 1dunno1

that sumofabitch was just standing there sleeping or something

i have half a mind to go back and run him over

after i was wondering what a goat would do to my truck at 70mph
i bet itd be like a speed bump

i swerved and miss the little bugger damned
 Quoting: scared the shit out of me 28386854


Speed bump ?.. @ 70mph more like an air-bag party!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27987962
Australia
11/27/2012 02:15 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
was it paved into the road?
Travis Bickle
Vigilantes need love too....

User ID: 26788702
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11/27/2012 02:17 AM

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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
Swerving coulda killT YA!

Next time... Hit the goat.
One of these days... A *REAL* rain is gonna come and wash all this scum off the streets.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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11/27/2012 02:20 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
Swerving coulda killT YA!

Next time... Hit the goat.
 Quoting: Travis Bickle


roger that
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 28386854
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11/27/2012 02:22 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
was it paved into the road?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27987962



no i dont think so

it must of been crossing and lost its train of thought

idk what the hell goes on in the mind of a goat except bahhhh
Nobuddy
User ID: 28529602
Canada
11/27/2012 02:26 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
The goat has made you alter your course.. your fate is sealed.
Anonymous Coward
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11/27/2012 02:30 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
should have stopped and taken it with you.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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11/27/2012 02:36 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
The goat has made you alter your course.. your fate is sealed.
 Quoting: Nobuddy 28529602


LOL i know scary inst ithiding
closing eyes

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11/27/2012 02:59 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
The goat has made you alter your course.. your fate is sealed.
 Quoting: Nobuddy 28529602


LOL i know scary inst ithiding
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28386854


I wonder what will happen now.....
If you woke up breathing, you have another chance!
Anonymous Coward
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11/27/2012 03:03 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
goatse
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 25825617
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11/27/2012 03:06 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
You should go fuck the goat instead.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28541203
Canada
11/27/2012 03:09 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
sheep
Nobuddy
User ID: 28529602
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11/27/2012 03:21 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
This goat represents the condemnation of Satan (see That Old Serpent) for the Satan-inspired sins of all humanity, this essence was captured & exiled long ago into the spiritual abyss..

This goat is the manifestation of that evil, he appeared from the abyss.. dazed and confused with just enough energy to look into your eyes & ask that you not send him back.

This evil & all that it now represents in this realm, is indebted to you.. he will return for you, because he knows you are the only one who can send him back.

You need to prepare yourself.. peace be with you.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 28386854
United States
11/27/2012 03:22 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
The goat has made you alter your course.. your fate is sealed.
 Quoting: Nobuddy 28529602


LOL i know scary inst ithiding
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28386854


I wonder what will happen now.....
 Quoting: closing eyes


lol me too.... destiny can at times be.... well.... surprising to say the least....lol
Anonymous Coward
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Australia
11/27/2012 03:25 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
You should have run it over bro and barbequed it
poke de goat for a quarter (OP)
User ID: 28386854
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11/27/2012 03:27 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
This goat represents the condemnation of Satan (see That Old Serpent) for the Satan-inspired sins of all humanity, this essence was captured & exiled long ago into the spiritual abyss..

This goat is the manifestation of that evil, he appeared from the abyss.. dazed and confused with just enough energy to look into your eyes & ask that you not send him back.

This evil & all that it now represents in this realm, is indebted to you.. he will return for you, because he knows you are the only one who can send him back.

You need to prepare yourself.. peace be with you.
 Quoting: Nobuddy 28529602


been there done that brother as in past tense

there will no return for him

in the astral that is./

i was raised by two Capricorns so i know a little about how they operate trust that one
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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11/27/2012 03:27 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
You should have run it over bro and barbequed it
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28378701


for you my aussie brother i will lol
Anonymous Coward
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Australia
11/27/2012 03:28 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
could of at least sprinkled a liitlle peer and mixed spices...second time round is always juicier
Anonymous Coward
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Australia
11/27/2012 03:36 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
You should have run it over bro and barbequed it
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28378701


for you my aussie brother i will lol
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28386854


Barbequed goat is nice here there is a restaurant you can get barbequed goat fillet with all the lashings it costs around $50.
Not cheap neither is goats milk which I love, it costs much more than the standard poisoned cows milk.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28378701
Australia
11/27/2012 03:39 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
Wild goat is better than farmed goat but you need to get it tested before you eat it.
I shot a few mountain goats here with my 338 lapua one of them had some bacteria that wasn't nice but even if you barbequed it would kill the bacteria.
but just on the safe side we fed it to the dogs they loved it and made them happy.
Just a risk with wild game you need to get it tested some times you could get sick.
In the old days it wasn't like this but in this day and age the animal could have drunk lead or some poison.
Anonymous Coward
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Canada
11/27/2012 03:40 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
Pubic hair is not just a biological accident that forces us to the waxing salon. It serves three critical functions. First, it protects the delicate vagina. Second, it serves as a reproductive billboard to alert potential mates that you are biologically (if not emotionally) prepared to procreate. And last, it's a pheromone carpet and traps the scents that lead potential mates to the promised land. So you might think twice before you shave it all off. It's there for a reason. Embrace it.

There are 8000 nerve endings in the clitoris, dedicated exclusively to female pleasure. The penis only has 4000. Who says God didn't take care of us girls?
The average vagina is 3-4 inches long, but fear not if your guy is hung like a horse. The vagina can expand by 200% when sexually aroused, kind of like a balloon. Remember, the vagina was made to birth babies, so it's exceedingly elastic. If you have pain when getting it on with someone large, you can use dilators to help stretch the vagina so you can accommodate the whole package.

The vagina doesn't connect to the lung. While the vagina can expand, it's not an open conduit to the abdominal cavity. While microscopic sperm can swim through a tiny hole in the cervix, a tampon simply won't fit. So if you lose something in there, don't worry. Reach in all the way and pull it out. Do not -- I repeat, do not -- go hunting for whatever you've lost with a pair of pliers. Think of your vagina as being like a sock. If you lose a banana in a sock...it stays in the sock.

Yes, it's true -- your vagina can fall out. Not to belabor the sock metaphor, but it can turn inside out just like a worn out sweat sock and hang between your legs as you get older. But don't fret; this condition -- called pelvic prolapse -- can be fixed.

Vaginas have something in common with sharks. Both contain squalene, a substance that exists in both shark livers and natural vaginal lubricant. (Cue music: "She's a maneater...")

You can catch sexually transmitted diseases even if you use a condom. Sorry to break it to you, but the skin of the vulva can still touch infectious skin of the scrotum -- and BAM! Warts. Herpes. Molluscum contagiosum. Pubic lice. So pick your partners carefully.

The average length of the labia minora is less than ¾ inch long (yes, someone got out a ruler and measured 2981 women). Only 1.8% of women have labia longer than 1 ½ inches. But remember, every vulva is different and special. Some lips hang down. Some are tucked up neatly inside. Some are long. Some are short. Some are even. Some aren't. All are beautiful. You're perfect just the way you are.

While hair on your head can live up to seven years, pubic hair has a life expectancy of about three weeks, which is why it only grows so long. So don't worry if you opt not to groom your pubes -- you won't need to braid them any time soon.

The word "vagina" comes from the Latin root meaning "sheath for a sword," which may explain why some women simply hate the word. So if you don't like the word "vagina," pick your own name for your girly parts. Just call it something and don't be afraid to talk about it.

Only about 30% of women have orgasms from intercourse alone. The clitoris is where the action is. Most women who do orgasm during sex have figured out how to hit their sweet spot, either from positioning or from direct stimulation of the clitoris with fingers.

Increasing evidence suggests that the G spot feels good because it lies right over a deep part of the clitoris. Although experts describe the G spot as being inside the vagina on the anterior wall, just under the urethra, the crura of the clitoris actually runs right there. And a recent study demonstrated that vaginal orgasms may actually be deep clitoral orgasms. But who cares? An orgasm is an orgasm. Appreciate it, regardless of where it comes from.

Vaginal farts (some call them "queefs" or "varts") happen to almost all women at one time or another, especially during sex or other forms of exercise. So don't be embarrassed if your hooha lets out a toot. You're perfectly normal.
Some women do ejaculate during orgasm, but you're normal if you don't. The controversial "female ejaculation" most likely represents two different phenomena. If it's a small amount of milky fluid, it likely comes from the paraurethral glands inside the urethra. If it's a cup, it's probably pee. Many times, it may be a little bit of both. But don't stress out about peeing on yourself. Put a towel under you and surrender to the experience.

Safe sex (or even just orgasm alone) is good for you. Benefits include lowering your risk of heart disease and stroke, reducing your risk of breast cancer, bolstering your immune system, helping you sleep, making you appear more youthful, improving your fitness, regulating menstrual cycles, relieving menstrual cramps, helping with chronic pain, reducing the risk of depression, lowering stress levels, and improving self esteem. So go at it, girlfriends!
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 28386854
United States
11/27/2012 03:46 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
You should have run it over bro and barbequed it
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28378701


for you my aussie brother i will lol
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28386854


Barbequed goat is nice here there is a restaurant you can get barbequed goat fillet with all the lashings it costs around $50.
Not cheap neither is goats milk which I love, it costs much more than the standard poisoned cows milk.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28378701


thanks for looking out bro i dont eat them ive had enough goat shit to last me 10 lifetimes

like when i worked in the salmon industry in Alaska i still get fishmares from all those years of fish heads and guts

i will eat some deer meat though elk most wild game had some turkeys chasing me around the board the other day LOL
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28378701
Australia
11/27/2012 04:35 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
You should have run it over bro and barbequed it
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28378701


for you my aussie brother i will lol
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28386854


Barbequed goat is nice here there is a restaurant you can get barbequed goat fillet with all the lashings it costs around $50.
Not cheap neither is goats milk which I love, it costs much more than the standard poisoned cows milk.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28378701


thanks for looking out bro i dont eat them ive had enough goat shit to last me 10 lifetimes

like when i worked in the salmon industry in Alaska i still get fishmares from all those years of fish heads and guts

i will eat some deer meat though elk most wild game had some turkeys chasing me around the board the other day LOL
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28386854


Fair enough bro get ya dasbier
Fishmares? :cruise?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28378701
Australia
11/27/2012 04:35 AM
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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
You should have run it over bro and barbequed it
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28378701


for you my aussie brother i will lol
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28386854


Barbequed goat is nice here there is a restaurant you can get barbequed goat fillet with all the lashings it costs around $50.
Not cheap neither is goats milk which I love, it costs much more than the standard poisoned cows milk.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28378701


thanks for looking out bro i dont eat them ive had enough goat shit to last me 10 lifetimes

like when i worked in the salmon industry in Alaska i still get fishmares from all those years of fish heads and guts

i will eat some deer meat though elk most wild game had some turkeys chasing me around the board the other day LOL
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28386854


Wild turkeys the good shit if you can get em
Chris Hansen

User ID: 28566812
Australia
11/27/2012 04:37 AM

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Re: fuckme i almost ran over a goat in the road
if you know a new zealander it would have been a nice Christmas present. they love their sheep, literally.
..why don't you take a seat over there