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dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!

 
pinkpixiexx

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01/24/2013 03:24 PM

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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!
pops head in door....hi
 Quoting: pinkpixiexx


Hey hey! I look at the thread titles and wonder how in the hell I ended up in some of the conversations. They are random at best. Lol. And I'm usually confused where I am. I'm down to three I think. :))
Actually two. The dating thread looks like a drinking thread now. Lol
 Quoting: PENG


HeHe.....I know....but the titles don't always mean much...lol

No the dating thread is still fun...just drink pops up every now and then..lol...gradually getting a few more people popping in too....hf

Last Edited by pinkpixie on 01/24/2013 03:25 PM
"When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace"

"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
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Last Edited by PENG on 01/27/2013 03:29 PM
"May the road rise up to meet you.... May the wind be always at your back..."
pinkpixiexx

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pops head in door....hi
 Quoting: pinkpixiexx


Hey hey! I look at the thread titles and wonder how in the hell I ended up in some of the conversations. They are random at best. Lol. And I'm usually confused where I am. I'm down to three I think. :))
Actually two. The dating thread looks like a drinking thread now. Lol
 Quoting: PENG


HeHe.....I know....but the titles don't always mean much...lol

No the dating thread is still fun...just drink pops up every now and then..lol...gradually gettingg a few more peole popping too....
 Quoting: pinkpixiexx


LOL.
 Quoting: PENG


Damn..I edited it ...but too late...lol...I haven't been drinking ...honest...lol
"When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace"

"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
Don'tBeAfraid

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01/24/2013 03:30 PM

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...


Well don't just say that, find me a gorgeous soul mate! God bless you. Writing more in a bit. 'Hoping Phoe's date was fantastic!
 Quoting: Don'tBeAfraid


Where is your one?
 Quoting: PENG


Loooooooooooooong story.
 Quoting: Don'tBeAfraid


Oh dear dear dear. You know I have time! I'm a good listener too. :)
Come on now, I spewed my self worth alllll over the place for you. ;)
 Quoting: PENG

Maybe someday. There's a ton of pain there. Not my fault actually. Anyway, I promised not to make a spectacle of her faults, and a gentleman doesn't talk about such things.
PENG

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Last Edited by PENG on 01/27/2013 03:30 PM
"May the road rise up to meet you.... May the wind be always at your back..."
Don'tBeAfraid

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01/24/2013 11:39 PM

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...


Loooooooooooooong story.
 Quoting: Don'tBeAfraid


Oh dear dear dear. You know I have time! I'm a good listener too. :)
Come on now, I spewed my self worth alllll over the place for you. ;)
 Quoting: PENG

Maybe someday. There's a ton of pain there. Not my fault actually. Anyway, I promised not to make a spectacle of her faults, and a gentleman doesn't talk about such things.
 Quoting: Don'tBeAfraid


No need to my friend! From all of your enlightening posts, I would expect nothing less from you. You know, once I experienced significant pain from the "heart." Devastating really. But it's such an advantage now and I am very thankful for the lessons.
What about you? Now, DontBeAfraid, are you looking with walls up? :)
 Quoting: PENG


No Honey, I don't put up barriers to relationships. There's no benefit to putting up walls or impediments. The goal is to remove them.

I got my heart busted up, and have been in a holding pattern for a bit. When the time is right and I meet the right one, I'll start dating again.

The problem isn't finding someone to date, for there are many wonderful ladies around, it's more complex and also hard to decide whether I'll stay here or not. I'm up for a change of scenery. Maybe I'll go on a walkabout like the aborigines do to clear my head.
[link to en.wikipedia.org]

[link to www.metrolyrics.com]

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/24/2013 11:44 PM
PENG

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Last Edited by PENG on 01/27/2013 03:30 PM
"May the road rise up to meet you.... May the wind be always at your back..."
Don'tBeAfraid

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01/24/2013 11:56 PM

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When the heart (soul) is broken

Sometimes we find someone very special. We decide to risk letting them see our whole being. They decide they like that hidden part of us, plus the part they already knew. They show their hidden aspects too, for now they feel braver.

Both lovers are filled with bliss. It's the magical time of romance when the intimacy is so heightened as to be beyond belief. We become giddy with it, completely intoxicated by their love.

Then, because people are human, time passes and maybe some very ugly aspects are revealed that were buried inside them. Some old habits emerge, sabotaging ones that damage the relationship. They do something, and we ignore it. They do it again, and it's clear they have problems. We rush to their aid, for we love them. They stagger and stumble, and sometimes are so weakened by their past and bad habits that no matter what we do, we can't "fix them".

Often they won't fix themselves. The best we can do is help them because we love them, and then once healed, walk away. For if we stay, we will enable them again. And to stay would not be good for them, nor for us.
[link to www.hitchedmag.com]

It crushes us, makes us melt, like Amelie in this scene. All people should watch that French masterpiece of cinema about the quirkiness of romance. You'll laugh and laugh, and then realize you're laughing at yourself. Then having done that, you accept the times you yourself made mistakes like Amelie.


Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/25/2013 12:10 AM
Don'tBeAfraid

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...

Maybe someday. There's a ton of pain there. Not my fault actually. Anyway, I promised not to make a spectacle of her faults, and a gentleman doesn't talk about such things.
 Quoting: Don'tBeAfraid


No need to my friend! From all of your enlightening posts, I would expect nothing less from you. You know, once I experienced significant pain from the "heart." Devastating really. But it's such an advantage now and I am very thankful for the lessons.
What about you? Now, DontBeAfraid, are you looking with walls up? :)
 Quoting: PENG


No Honey, I don't put up barriers to relationships. There's no benefit to putting up walls or impediments. The goal is to remove them.

I got my heart busted up, and have been in a holding pattern for a bit. When the time is right and I meet the right one, I'll start dating again.
 Quoting: Don'tBeAfraid


I'm so sorry. I wish I knew someone. You are a complex individual though. Show your eyes darn it. Not fair at all. Windows to the soul. Hell the whole damn glp community has access to me. No mystery there.

Hmm maybe I'll draw a picture and guess. I'll figure it out. You are a male though, right? Need a baseline here.

Lol. You know I'm playing right? hf
 Quoting: PENG

Yes Goof. I'm a guy, a rowdy masculine guy that's fairly lean and well educated and well spoken. Obviously spiritual. Given to being sensitive and considerate. Handy around the house or farm at repairing things. Practiced at long term relationships (and a few passionate affairs too for I'm human).
[link to www.elyrics.net]
And no I have a full head of hair!
One sweet country lady told me this song is about me.


Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/25/2013 12:05 AM
Don'tBeAfraid

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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!
Removing barriers, but keeping things mysterious

When first the Fox saw the Lion he was terribly frightened, and ran away and hid himself in the wood. Next time however he came near the King of Beasts he stopped at a safe distance and watched him pass by. The third time they came near one another the Fox went straight up to the Lion and passed the time of day with him, asking him how his family were, and when he should have the pleasure of seeing him again; then turning his tail, he parted from the Lion without much ceremony. Aesop c. 620-564 B.C.

Familiarity breeds contempt. You've heard it said. You've seen it happen in others. You've had it happen to you or you did it as a result of being with someone long enough.

Why does it happen? The dirty secret is humans get bored too easily. How many times have you as a teenager or as a parent of a teenager hears your teen say, “I'm bored...”? They're bored because of familiarity.

We can't change that. It's an essential aspect of being human. We innately wish to be entertained with progressive newness and sometimes desiring shocking things to startle us.

It's why horror films, comedy, drama, tragedy, action, tear-jerkers, etc are all entertaining. They are newness in a world that seems staid and boring. We don't want stability, we want something novel.

Aha! This should be an epiphany moment. This should be like icy cold water in the shower on a Winter morning in an unheated cabin.

Women desire stability and will work really hard to get it. Men don't want stability and will resist it. When it happens in a relationship, there's momentary catharsis from the struggle and then relief and bliss and often tears, but then things get slower and slower and less interesting and people yawn, and then....a breakup.

Despite what you know to be true, you'll read some stupid book on “How to be your husbands' best friend”. You'll replace the sexy chased seductress that enticed him with the girl next door and become a doormat.

Or for the guys, you'll read endless magazines written for women to women, and then think that is you understand women and can become their best friend, then you can catch a hot one. What happens, you caught the kiss of death, and then you'll hear in horror the worst thing a woman can say, “I don't feel attracted to you that way...let's just be friends. You're such a great guy friend.” ARGHHHHHHHH!!!

You need to keep things off-kilter. You need to make things mysterious. You need to make things novel. You need to run to them, then run away, and so the chase is perpetual.

As long as a relationship is an eternal sense of wonder about the Other, then they will keep coming back for more. If you make all your mystery dissipate, then they will be bored and move on. They will especially move on if a guy.

NOTE: We don't keep secrets from one another, for that is not good and is an impediment to intimacy. But you also don't reveal every little minutia that demystifies the supernatural attraction that she feels for you and likewise the magical attraction that you feel for her will be diminished if you know everything about her. Don't do it.

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/25/2013 05:00 AM
PENG

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01/25/2013 08:19 AM

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Last Edited by PENG on 01/27/2013 03:30 PM
"May the road rise up to meet you.... May the wind be always at your back..."
Don'tBeAfraid

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01/25/2013 08:49 AM

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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!
James Taylor is awesome. Oh you poor thing. Not in a sympathetic tone, but heart breaking. Have you stopped trying to fix broken hearts and work on your own?
Why must relationships be so complicated? I'm too tired and getting way too old to over analyze. So I started to look at it this way; life is short and I have no time to play games. If it takes forever and a day to make someone happy, it's just not worth it. I used to go around trying to mend broken hearts and I think sometimes these people just want to be broken hearted, or are so comfortable with it, they don't know how to be happy.

People also spend so much time trying to find happiness in others. That is devastating to a relationship.

In regard to you post above, I think it depends on the person. Some people are naturally content, while others go crazy without excitement. It's finding the right person.

That is too perfect up there. What are the snakes? We allll have snakes. :D Ever study The Thinker? I think Dante was contemplating his internal struggle. I find it ironic that so many interpretations come from this piece of art. lol. Internal struggles?
 Quoting: PENG

Little Sister, as you get older, you realize from seeing your friends over and over getting divorced that most people are broken-hearted in the end. As such as any person entering into new relationships over time, it's almost impossible to enter into a relationship with a pristine woman who hasn't had her heart broken. She didn't exist in a vacuum under glass, but is a real human being who once was in a series of relationship, all of which ended either by death or choice.

Relationships are not really that complicated. They are mostly simple. Men are very simple by comparison to women, but that's likely a issue of self-worth, and hence why I spent so much time demystifying it.

Neurosis is "Excessive and irrational anxiety or obsession".Many rural people have lower expectations and lower stress. Many urban folks have high stress and very high expectations and hence more neurosis. That impedes relationships. It makes relationships more difficult often in urban centers. Urban centers have more people, and so more choices of other lovers, more competition, and so more broken relationships.

Yes, some people become aware of their environment and lack of romance and become sensitive to their unhappiness. I discussed that too.

True awareness as a psychic is about seeing all of the sensations: both positive and negative.

You're right, some people are very low maintenance and easy to please, but most of the time, in my experience they are men. Why? Self-worth and depictions of beauty, especially as people age.

Yes, we do have impediments to relationships. Those are the snakes. We contend with them in an eternal wrestling match and often they crush us, or we perceive that our impediments inable our ability to find romance.

Do you mean Rodin? [link to t1.gstatic.com]

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/25/2013 08:53 AM
Charlott

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01/25/2013 10:06 AM

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Is this a thread for dating advice?
Charlotte :)
Don'tBeAfraid

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Is this a thread for dating advice?
 Quoting: Charlott


Why yes it is, Ms Freewoman, for that is the meaning of your name. It's a musical name too.

What's your question and how may I help you?

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/25/2013 10:26 AM
Charlott

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Is this a thread for dating advice?
 Quoting: Charlott


Why yes it is, Ms Freewoman, for that is the meaning of your name. It's a musical name too.

What's your question and how may I help you?
 Quoting: Don'tBeAfraid


Oh Thank You, I didn't know that!!

I don't really have a specific question, but I thought it was great that there was a thread about this topic here. I do have this unique ability for compliated relationships tho. Currently I am seeing a guy who is married, but seperated from his wife. Is that wrong? I know that makes me look like a bad person.
Charlotte :)
Don'tBeAfraid

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Is this a thread for dating advice?
 Quoting: Charlott


Why yes it is, Ms Freewoman, for that is the meaning of your name. It's a musical name too.

What's your question and how may I help you?
 Quoting: Don'tBeAfraid


Oh Thank You, I didn't know that!!

I don't really have a specific question, but I thought it was great that there was a thread about this topic here. I do have this unique ability for compliated relationships tho. Currently I am seeing a guy who is married, but seperated from his wife. Is that wrong? I know that makes me look like a bad person.
 Quoting: Charlott

No my dear, thank you for visiting. All of us become emeshed in complex relationships. It's the natural state for we're complicated, mostly by our lack of self-worth. I hope you go back and read my posts from page 5 on as well as dialogue between Phoenixe and Peng for that was a very valuable and honest exchange.

I'd like to help, but I have to ask some questions. Feel free to write as long a response as you feel is adequate to explaining your circumstances. You won't get judgement from me, only a sincere desire to assist you.

If I ask anything that you feel is personal, but still desire to answer, then you should be vague in order to protect your privacy. Of course you can skip that question too.

Dating someone who hasn't disengaged from their spouse is fraught with complexity. Is he living with her? Is he living on his own? Has he engaged a divorce attorney? When is the divorce final? Why has he begun a serious relationship with you now? How do you feel about him? How is the connection?

Seldom do people only marry once. People make mistakes and then divorce and remarry. What would you like to happen? Are you in love? How do you feel about marriage?

Obviously I'm a Christian, but I know many people are not, and I believe that we're not to impose our personal values on others, for there is Free Will. Still, that will color my answers in the same way that my background or your background will color yours.

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/25/2013 11:31 AM
Charlott

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Oh you’re so nice, thank you.

No I don’t mind answering questions. He is separated from his wife now, but he wasn’t when I started seeing him. As far as I know they have not gotten attorneys yet, or filed for anything. For the longest I thought I was doing him some harm, or their marriage, but he always told me it wasn’t me, he had spent so much time away while he was in the army that they didn’t get along anymore. I do love him, and it’s nice being able to spend so much time with him now. I don’t know about marriage yet. I’d like to get married someday, but don’t know if I am ready for that. I would like to see him get his divorce, but at the same time I don’t want to be pushy about it either. When he separated from his wife, is when the relationship became more serious.
Charlotte :)
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Last Edited by PENG on 01/27/2013 03:31 PM
"May the road rise up to meet you.... May the wind be always at your back..."
Don'tBeAfraid

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01/25/2013 11:08 PM

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Oh you’re so nice, thank you.

No I don’t mind answering questions. He is separated from his wife now, but he wasn’t when I started seeing him. As far as I know they have not gotten attorneys yet, or filed for anything. For the longest I thought I was doing him some harm, or their marriage, but he always told me it wasn’t me, he had spent so much time away while he was in the army that they didn’t get along anymore. I do love him, and it’s nice being able to spend so much time with him now. I don’t know about marriage yet. I’d like to get married someday, but don’t know if I am ready for that. I would like to see him get his divorce, but at the same time I don’t want to be pushy about it either. When he separated from his wife, is when the relationship became more serious.
 Quoting: Charlott


You're welcome.

Dating someone who wasn't separated is not a good way to begin a relationship. Since they still are dwelling with their spouse, then their attention is not wholly focused upon you. That distraction is not a good thing by any means.

Since that time, he separated, and likely your relationship is part of that process, and that also is not good. When dating you have to examine not only your feelings, for that would be selfish, but also care about his feelings and in many respects caring more for him than yourself is the partial definition of true romance and love.

Getting a divorce is a major financial and mental and physical and spiritual decision. It requires deep contemplation, and yet for many it's a snap decision. The fact that he's still deliberating and hasn't gotten an attorney should be troubling to you. In some respects it means he contemplating it, which can be positive or negative.

Yes, separation must exist for a relationship to happen, but more so, a divorce must happen and then time to process “why” a divorce happened is essential to not making the same mistakes.

When someone is very lonely and going through both the isolation of being a soldier plus the process of discovering that a marriage is ending, then that person will grasp for any love which they can find. That's not a positive for you.

What would be a positive would be a man who has settled down, examined all of his feelings, and decided to make a course change in his journey and to see you as someone who he could journey with. That implies “togetherness”.

I hope you deeply examine your rationale for dating a married man. It's not an auspicious beginning. I'm saying that not as a criticism, but as someone who genuinely hopes you find real romance and friendship and a soul mate.

Think about what his qualities are and why you are attracted to him.

Would you say that you have high self-worth? I hope you read my previous posts. I believe they could help you process your feelings.

By the way, I'm totally seperating out my Christian identity and only discussing this with you from a friendly psychological perspective.

Since marriages last seven years with a 50% divorce rate (many nations), then it's not entered into lightly. A long courtship can be a good thing, but wasn't done historically for many. Look for an upcoming post on that.

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/25/2013 11:11 PM
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People make relationships complicated. They don't have to be. Everyone I know who divorced, never had a stable foundation to begin with. A first it seemed as if they did, but if you looked deeper, even they didn't see it.

These days no one sets expectations and communicates what they expect from a relationship.... More specifically marriage. I'm talking about those relationships. Will you marry me just doesn't cut it. It's a false fairytale. Rarely do two people sit down and say, "ok, this is what I value, this is where I stand, where do you stand on these things?" You know, stay at home or don't stay at home, no children or 3 and if 3, when and how do we plan to raise them.....It goes on and on. People don't talk anymore.

People do grow and change, but the very basic morals and values one holds don't often change.

Yes, there are some broken hearts out there and they are the most difficult ones to win over. No question. I bet they are some of the most faithful though. ;) I sometimes think that alot of men have self worth issues, they just portray it more hurtful ways than women do.

Yes, Rodin.
 Quoting: PENG

Yes. I agree completely. When you talk deeply then you learn more and can anticipate impediments to a deepening relationship. Not talking, then most people go, "WTF! I never knew he/she thought that! Oh SHIT! I'm screwed." and then spend an enormous amount of time trying "to fix it".

Having talked deeply, and establishing such intimacy and removing impediments results in enormous affection, laying on a counch for two hours and just looking into each other's eyes, touching each other, cuddling, and profound bliss from kissing. Then if deeply committed and making love, undefinable intense orgasms.

YES! Men have just as many self-worth issues, but honestly they are minor compared to women. Most men do not perpetually think, "Am I handsome enough to win her heart?" Most men can see a level of self-worth inside themselves, if not also being a little too cocky (though that is false projection of worth mostly).

NOTE: I prefer Rodin's Mermaid study
[link to www.christies.com]

We are called as men to the sirens whose beckoning song entralls us. It may doom us, but we care not. Like Ulysses we risk listening and looking for them.
"The term refers to the pact that Ulysses (Greek name Odysseus) made with his men as they approached the Sirens. Ulysses wanted to hear the Sirens' song although he knew that doing so would render him incapable of rational thought. He put wax in his men's ears so that they could not hear, and had them tie him to the mast so that he could not jump into the sea. He ordered them not to change course under any circumstances, and to keep their swords upon him to attack him if he should break free of his bonds.

Upon hearing the Sirens' song, Ulysses was driven temporarily insane and struggled with all of his might to break free so that he might join the Sirens, which would have meant his death."

[link to en.wikipedia.org]
[link to i.telegraph.co.uk] a painting by John Williams Waterhouse
Note: Look at the most excellent way Waterhouse depicts the Lady as both entrancing and irresitable but also leaves her tummy and doesn't create a false sense of Perfection, but rather paints her somewhat realistically. Women leave their home, in this case the Sea, and lose some connection with their past when they chose to share our life. It's poignant.

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/25/2013 11:37 PM
Don'tBeAfraid

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Like Iron Hans or Iron John(see earlier postings on men) you cannot understand women unless you read the Little Mermaid by Hans Christian Anderson.
[link to hca.gilead.org.il]
[link to i.telegraph.co.uk]
"The little mermaid drew back the crimson curtain of the tent, and beheld the fair bride with her head resting on the prince’s breast. She bent down and kissed his fair brow, then looked at the sky on which the rosy dawn grew brighter and brighter; then she glanced at the sharp knife, and again fixed her eyes on the prince, who whispered the name of his bride in his dreams. She was in his thoughts, and the knife trembled in the hand of the little mermaid: then she flung it far away from her into the waves; the water turned red where it fell, and the drops that spurted up looked like blood. She cast one more lingering, half-fainting glance at the prince, and then threw herself from the ship into the sea, and thought her body was dissolving into foam. The sun rose above the waves, and his warm rays fell on the cold foam of the little mermaid, who did not feel as if she were dying. She saw the bright sun, and all around her floated hundreds of transparent beautiful beings; she could see through them the white sails of the ship, and the red clouds in the sky; their speech was melodious, but too ethereal to be heard by mortal ears, as they were also unseen by mortal eyes. The little mermaid perceived that she had a body like theirs, and that she continued to rise higher and higher out of the foam. “Where am I?” asked she, and her voice sounded ethereal, as the voice of those who were with her; no earthly music could imitate it. "

Don't waste your time on the Disney santized version. That's a sweet fairy tale. The real story is rough and deep and anyone, male or female, could get a lot out of thinking about that story.

Read that, and I'll comment upon it later.

Guys reading these posts, you MUST read that story to understand your wives and girlfriends.

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/25/2013 11:45 PM
PENG

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01/25/2013 11:51 PM

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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!


Last Edited by PENG on 01/27/2013 03:09 PM
"May the road rise up to meet you.... May the wind be always at your back..."
Anonymous Coward
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01/25/2013 11:53 PM
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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!
You are thinking to much …… stop it!..... enjoy life
 Quoting: YaRight


Yes, if it's right you usually know right from the start. Alot of dating problems, IMHO, arise from a lack of self-assurance, so I suggest you get to know yourself, be happy with yourself, and get out there and meet people, and don't dwell on the 'missed opportunities'.
Don'tBeAfraid

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01/25/2013 11:58 PM

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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!
Like Iron Hans or Iron John(see earlier postings on men) you cannot understand women unless you read the Little Mermaid by Hans Christian Anderson.
[link to hca.gilead.org.il]
[link to i.telegraph.co.uk]
"The little mermaid drew back the crimson curtain of the tent, and beheld the fair bride with her head resting on the prince’s breast. She bent down and kissed his fair brow, then looked at the sky on which the rosy dawn grew brighter and brighter; then she glanced at the sharp knife, and again fixed her eyes on the prince, who whispered the name of his bride in his dreams. She was in his thoughts, and the knife trembled in the hand of the little mermaid: then she flung it far away from her into the waves; the water turned red where it fell, and the drops that spurted up looked like blood. She cast one more lingering, half-fainting glance at the prince, and then threw herself from the ship into the sea, and thought her body was dissolving into foam. The sun rose above the waves, and his warm rays fell on the cold foam of the little mermaid, who did not feel as if she were dying. She saw the bright sun, and all around her floated hundreds of transparent beautiful beings; she could see through them the white sails of the ship, and the red clouds in the sky; their speech was melodious, but too ethereal to be heard by mortal ears, as they were also unseen by mortal eyes. The little mermaid perceived that she had a body like theirs, and that she continued to rise higher and higher out of the foam. “Where am I?” asked she, and her voice sounded ethereal, as the voice of those who were with her; no earthly music could imitate it. "

Don't waste your time on the Disney santized version. That's a sweet fairy tale. The real story is rough and deep and anyone, male or female, could get a lot out of thinking about that story.

Read that, and I'll comment upon it later.

Guys reading these posts, you MUST read that story to understand your wives and girlfriends.
 Quoting: Don'tBeAfraid


I don't believe mermaids were innocent creatures. I think they were portrayed as manipulative creatures preying on men who were awestruck by their beauty. Hmmmm. lol. I don't know why, but in these paintings, that's what I see in their eyes. And NO, I do not relate. LOL.
 Quoting: PENG


There's some seriously potential projecting going on there, PENG!
[link to en.wikipedia.org]
Read the story first please.
PENG

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01/26/2013 12:24 AM

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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!


Last Edited by PENG on 01/27/2013 03:11 PM
"May the road rise up to meet you.... May the wind be always at your back..."
Don'tBeAfraid

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01/26/2013 12:39 AM

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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!
Lmao. What happened to simple interpretation? What do you make then of my interpretation of seeing a wolf in CalmShocks avatar squirrel? Lol. There's some Freud for ya.

And I am so on to you now. I am getting you! I did read the story. I speed read. Alright, let us see who else is projecting. I will be right back!


Ok.

There are accounts of mermaids not only luring sailors to their deaths, but going out of their way to save them. Stories abound of mermaids taking human shape, marrying and settling down, at least for a while, though they almost always wind up back in the sea, or if not, then yearning for it.

Sometimes mermaids don’t have to give up their watery home, but entice their lovers to take the plunge. A marvelous example is the legend of the Mermaid of Zennor. This mermaid fell in love with a church chorister and lured him into the sea where he was never heard from again. The mermaid’s image is carved on a chair that sits in a medieval church in the village of Zennor in Cornwall, England.
[link to www.suemonkkidd.com]

It's in the eye of the beholder.... And which culture you choose to believe.

But come on now. Look at her eyes! She's looking for her prey. Lol
 Quoting: PENG

You are such a flirt! Watch carefully Ladies, you could learn from PENG!

While I discuss the process of chase and withdraw and flirting, PENG actually puts it in practice besides being lovely and charming.
SmileyWink
PENG

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01/26/2013 12:59 AM

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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!


Last Edited by PENG on 01/27/2013 03:11 PM
"May the road rise up to meet you.... May the wind be always at your back..."
Don'tBeAfraid

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01/26/2013 01:03 AM

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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!
Now now would you rather I be boring? I am! ....in great kindness of course. I intend to fill buckets, not empty them. See? I have very few walls!
Let me put it this way, I have no time for games. What you see/read is what you get. No different than if you were right in front of me. I would talk your ear off. My pictures aren't altered (except the blurry ones I had to sharpen LOL... Vain I know) and I have little desire to impress anyone.

Those I like or find fun are the people I like to make smile. And honestly, sometimes I crack myself up. I laugh at my own jokes.

Now do you wonder why people come here and visit? The regulars and old timers? Why they are here til all hours?

You aren't from this planet or time period. You know too much. Unless your like 200 years old or a savant, you know way too much. Are you a computer? Even if you are, I'm quite entertained! I'm ok with that. I'm ok with most of GLP's surreptitious intentions. s226

Come on, you like the butt^^^^ don't you? tounge
 Quoting: PENG


Because I am an unmarried red blooded American male, and you are a married lovely clever charming female, I will refrain from flirting (though it is extremely tempting).

It's plausible I am a savant, but not 200. I'm a tiny fraction of that number.

And Silly PENG, while I am a "butt man" you know what I'll say, "Love the totality of a Lady...with your entire soul."

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/26/2013 01:04 AM
PENG

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01/26/2013 01:18 AM

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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!


Last Edited by PENG on 01/27/2013 03:12 PM
"May the road rise up to meet you.... May the wind be always at your back..."
Dangerwalt

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Brazil
01/26/2013 01:30 AM

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Re: dating&romance advice - see Don´tBeAfraid´s tips/explanations - edited to have only the useful information for ya!
interesting thread.
Just one any....

The first symptom of stupidity is to think that we already know everything...

hollowichigo

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