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I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 146056
United Kingdom
12/07/2012 04:52 PM
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I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
ive been eating prunes, fruit, porridge etc etc but im still shitting maltesers 5 days later

it now really hurts and im gonna have to take some laxatives or a supository

but 5 days ? why ? always been regular

anyone ever beat that ?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 3579277
United Kingdom
12/07/2012 04:55 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Mashed potatoes mixed with good sized dollops of Olive oil margarine.
Your jobbies should come out like RN torpedoes next time.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1129812
United States
12/07/2012 04:56 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Go see a doctor or, buy some laxatives. Problem solved.

The things people take up bandwidth for...crazy
HI.Lander

User ID: 28896397
United States
12/07/2012 04:56 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Eat some Taco Bell and wash it down with cheap malt liquor.

It should open the flood gates.
"Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one." -- Marcus Aurelius

Today I broke my personal record for most consecutive days lived.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 146056
United Kingdom
12/07/2012 04:58 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
i might just have a chiken tikka pathia tonight and about 6 beers to wash it down with

would rather have the squirts than be eggbound
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29256787
Australia
12/07/2012 05:00 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Drink liquid magnesium luv. 50mls will do the trick..
cochise123

User ID: 19526335
Canada
12/07/2012 05:03 PM

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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
I'd send some of my wife's meatloaf, but then I'd probably get busted for domestic terrorism.
Tinfoil is not a fashion accessory.
Old MacDonald

User ID: 28707337
Canada
12/07/2012 05:04 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
shitstreamtp
In a Time of Universal Deceit, Telling the Truth is a Revolutionary Act - George Orwell

Rachel Maddow is HOT!!! - Seriously I'd hit it.

A VOTE FOR JUSTIN TRUDEAU IN 2015, WOULD BE THE MOST COWARDLY & IRRESPONSIBLE THING A CANADIAN CITIZEN COULD DO TO THEIR OWN PEOPLE. GUN GRABBERS ARE THE COMMON ENEMY OF ALL PEOPLE.

GUN CONTROL HAS RESULTED IN THE SLAUGHTER OF 262 MILLION CITIZENS BY THEIR GOVERNMENTS OVER THE PAST 100 YEARS.

THE LIBERAL PARTY OF CANADA & THE NDP ENDORSE GUN CONTROL, AN ESSENTIAL POLICY OF HITLER, STALIN, MAO, POL POT, EDI AMIN, QADDAFI, SADDAM, ASSAD, & EVERY OTHER TYRANNICAL GOVERNMENT THIS PAST CENTURY.

CANADIANS MUST NEVER FORGET THE BETRAYAL OF BILLS C-68 & C-17. WE MUST NOT REST UNTIL THEY ARE FULLY REPEALED.

C-19 WAS A GOOD START......BUT JUST A START. GET OFF YOUR COLLECTIVE ASSES AND MAKE AN IMPACT. WE HAVE 26 MONTHS.

I, THEE BOB, SWEAR ON THE ALTER OF GOD TO FIGHT ALL FORMS OF CANADIAN TYRANNY AND SAVE MY COUNTRY FROM THE EVILS OF THE NEW WORLD ORDER. I WILL NEVER HAND IN MY GUNS. EVER. I AM A FREE MAN, I WILL NOT BE THE BITCH OF THE SOCIALIST ESTABLISHMENT. LEAVE ME ALONE.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29289730
Australia
12/07/2012 05:05 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
ive been eating prunes, fruit, porridge etc etc but im still shitting maltesers 5 days later

it now really hurts and im gonna have to take some laxatives or a supository

but 5 days ? why ? always been regular

anyone ever beat that ?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 146056


put a stick up your arse and give it a poke? 1dunno1
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1329748
United States
12/07/2012 05:06 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Eat your leafy greens.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 146056
United Kingdom
12/07/2012 05:06 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Drink liquid magnesium luv. 50mls will do the trick..
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29256787


will try this

how long does it take ? i could keep u all posted
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 146056
United Kingdom
12/07/2012 05:07 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
I'd send some of my wife's meatloaf, but then I'd probably get busted for domestic terrorism.
 Quoting: cochise123


lol

maybe if i laugh hard enough ill shit myself
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29267783
United States
12/07/2012 05:07 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Taco Bell and very hot jalapeno peppers.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 25616504
United States
12/07/2012 05:08 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
yeah you should be concerned not scared

take a coffee enema, and cut out the gluten totally
PitViper

User ID: 12698388
United States
12/07/2012 05:11 PM

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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Drink liquid magnesium luv. 50mls will do the trick..
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29256787


Magnesium citrate from Walgreens will work. Get the grape.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29155775
United Kingdom
12/07/2012 05:12 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Go see a doctor or, buy some laxatives. Problem solved.

The things people take up bandwidth for...crazy
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1129812


rofl
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 146056
United Kingdom
12/07/2012 05:12 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
im in the US on business, can I get this from a CVS pharmacy ?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28867210
United States
12/07/2012 05:12 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
stop having anal, ffs.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28806063
United States
12/07/2012 05:14 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
About 5-7 days is the most you can go without wondering if you'll ever be able to poop again. Your intestines need to keep moving and that means moving crap out. Not much more than a spinal cord injury or heavy narcotics typically results in not having a crap in as long as that. Do what you have to but make some progress fast or go to a hospital.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 146056
United Kingdom
12/07/2012 05:14 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Go see a doctor or, buy some laxatives. Problem solved.

The things people take up bandwidth for...crazy
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1129812


rofl
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29155775


give it 4 hrs and ill show u bandwith
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 9266723
United States
12/07/2012 05:15 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Get to a doctor. You could have a blockage, and that could result in serious damage to the colon, even death.
bendinglight

User ID: 2143478
United States
12/07/2012 05:17 PM

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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
OP in 3...2...1.... fight
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29289730
Australia
12/07/2012 05:18 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Get to a doctor. You could have a blockage, and that could result in serious damage to the colon, even death.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9266723


5a

YaY maybey then this OP will stop posting useless threads.
Dexdrake

User ID: 28933027
United States
12/07/2012 05:48 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Go to WAlly world (walmart), purchse some "Phillips" Colon Health...man it works well for me whenever I get clogged up....it occurs more frequently as one ages....if you're in severe pain ...better hit the emergency room....Walmart has the cheapest price.
just waiting for the SHTF...been watching the USA go into the sewer for 52 years.tried to fight the gun grabbers, had some victories...tried to fight corrupt politicians as a delegate to the Republican party...found out it's all BS
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 24537507
United States
12/07/2012 05:50 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
Go to a dr. ASAP! All the really bad problems in life start and end with your ass.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27129259
United States
12/07/2012 05:52 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
add apple cider vinegar to your diet 1 tablespoon in a glass of ice water 2x a day

also go buy some coconut oil and use it instead of other oils (to fry, bake etc). I put a tsp of it in my hot cocoa and it tastes good.

do this every day, and you'll start going 2-3 times a day.
You'll feel pretty healthy.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28293300
Australia
12/07/2012 05:52 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared



I guess this answers whether the bear shits in the woods...

Good luck OP...

We dont need any footage, but a sound track would be awesome..


PS...take a doo doo bag and scraper if you go out...


Them Mercans wont like you crapping on the street.

:)
Good luck!
trailingedge
where thought goes energy flows

User ID: 15341848
Australia
12/07/2012 05:55 PM

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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
If all the other suggestions don't work take a large dose or oral vitamin c...
I suggest 10-15,000 mg.
Perfectly safe but will cause a movement for sure...
hf
where thought goes, energy flows

"youth is the ultimate wealth, and you're a bit poorer today."
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 14105059
United States
12/07/2012 06:00 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
How did you manage to quit ?

I'm totally addicted.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 20460818
United States
12/07/2012 06:00 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
its going to be a whooper when she comes.Go see a doctor.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28293300
Australia
12/07/2012 06:03 PM
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Re: I havent had a poo for 5 days - scared
its going to be a whooper when she comes.Go see a doctor.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 20460818


a whooper?

Is that with mayo and cheese or just a burger on it's own?