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I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?

 
hcc
User ID: 6493463
United States
12/08/2012 10:39 PM
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I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
I'm a person whose life is actually good. I have a job, a nice husband, a wonderful daughter who has grown up to be a great person. I'm healthy, energetic.

So why am I sad?

Because I have two cats and two wonderful little chihuahuas. One of the chis is the love of my life. He has melanoma and may not make it through another year.

One of the cats has diabetes and seizures and probably will not last 6 months.

Watching these wonderful little souls aging ... soon to pass away ... is unbearable. They have been so much a part of my life for the last 13 years.

Their souls are so simple, their hearts so loving, their loyalty so unquestioned. It's not right they should die while so many evil humans live on...

It fills me sadness every day I can't turn back time. I can't ignore it. It's going to happen. And soon. It makes me so much sadder, to think of their deaths, than to think of my own.

Does anyone else have feelings like this?

Thanks.
chuckslik

User ID: 27694053
Canada
12/08/2012 10:42 PM

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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Try to make them comfortable.
Spend time with them...that's all they want.
Positive energy.
some drink from the fountain of knowledge...others just gargle
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 6493463
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12/08/2012 10:46 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Try to make them comfortable.
Spend time with them...that's all they want.
Positive energy.
 Quoting: chuckslik


So sweet. Thank you....
hf
Mr. Know-it-all
User ID: 3064002
United States
12/08/2012 10:50 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Try to make them comfortable.
Spend time with them...that's all they want.
Positive energy.
 Quoting: chuckslik


Yes.

When their seizures/suffering becomes too much/frequent, take them to be put to sleep. Cast their paw prints and have them cremated. Keep their ashes in urns for your mantle. Grieve for 3 months. Then get yourself new kittens and puppies.

We have many loved ones in life that we are reunited with after death.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 990186
United States
12/08/2012 10:53 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Look into ASEA. It appears to be help animals and people.
CeeLite

User ID: 1482671
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12/08/2012 10:54 PM

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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
It's a lot that is happening at once, you're their strength part of this is they are probably leaning on you and you're giving all you have. The sadness can snowball though to the point where you can't help the animals or once the animals are gone you aren't able to be there for your family. Maybe think about counseling or talking to someone about this who isn't a co-caretaker to the animals just to get perspective may help.
CeeLite

User ID: 1482671
United States
12/08/2012 10:55 PM

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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Try to make them comfortable.
Spend time with them...that's all they want.
Positive energy.
 Quoting: chuckslik


Yes.

When their seizures/suffering becomes too much/frequent, take them to be put to sleep. Cast their paw prints and have them cremated. Keep their ashes in urns for your mantle. Grieve for 3 months. Then get yourself new kittens and puppies.

We have many loved ones in life that we are reunited with after death.
 Quoting: Mr. Know-it-all 3064002


Have them cremated and don't feel guilty about the cost, that way they can always be with you.
Nine's

User ID: 23438707
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12/08/2012 10:56 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Reading your post made my heart drop to my stomach again. My last dog died from cancer. Have read many others on here with the same problems and the pain they endure. The humans, not the animals.

It seems to not bother the animals as much as it does us. Humans worry, think about the future, think of life without them, think of their pain. Animals are happy to be with you and happy for kindness, love,food, and just being with us.

When my dog neared the time I'd have to help him leave, I'd talk to him and tell him when he felt too bad to go on, it was fine to leave. That I'd be fine without him. It made me feel like I was lying to tell him that, because it didn't feel at all that I'd be fine, but it felt like something he'd like to hear...and believe.

Wish there were words of comfort for you OP. How I wish. It's so hard to go through. Know you aren't alone. There's always someone going through the same thing. It's a terrible problem. May your journey, as well as your loved animals, be as pain free as possible. Sadone
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27185258
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12/08/2012 10:57 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
verysad


You can always make a donation to animals in need this holiday season.

[link to www.aspca.org]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29356713
Australia
12/08/2012 11:00 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
I feel for ya op - this pic is energy bear, for you.

:energybear8:
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27202787
Australia
12/08/2012 11:01 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Don't mean to be mean, but this is ridiculous.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 6493463
United States
12/08/2012 11:02 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
It's a lot that is happening at once, you're their strength part of this is they are probably leaning on you and you're giving all you have. The sadness can snowball though to the point where you can't help the animals or once the animals are gone you aren't able to be there for your family. Maybe think about counseling or talking to someone about this who isn't a co-caretaker to the animals just to get perspective may help.
 Quoting: CeeLite


Thanks, I'm thinking of going to pet-grief counseling.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1617215
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12/08/2012 11:02 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
try getting on an anti-depressant
CeeLite

User ID: 1482671
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12/08/2012 11:06 PM

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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
I don't know if this helps, but sometimes our pets come back to us once they have passed and faster than we think. If after this is all done you find an animal that reminds you of one of them, it could be one of them...take it for the gift that it is:)
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 6493463
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12/08/2012 11:06 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Try to make them comfortable.
Spend time with them...that's all they want.
Positive energy.
 Quoting: chuckslik


Yes.

When their seizures/suffering becomes too much/frequent, take them to be put to sleep. Cast their paw prints and have them cremated. Keep their ashes in urns for your mantle. Grieve for 3 months. Then get yourself new kittens and puppies.

We have many loved ones in life that we are reunited with after death.
 Quoting: Mr. Know-it-all 3064002


Thanks that's very practical advice and there are many kittens and puppies needing homes. I wish I could believe in reuniting. I want to believe and it feels good to fantasize about it, but it's not really very plausible. Kind of like thinking you're going to get asked out by the cutest guy in class.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29373288
Australia
12/08/2012 11:07 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
No, no one can help you, this is the sad part about sadness, only you can stop you being sad.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29210797
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12/08/2012 11:08 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
((((HUGS))))
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 6493463
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12/08/2012 11:08 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
I feel for ya op - this pic is energy bear, for you.

:energybear8:
 Quoting: Dances


Beautiful.
red_heart
Nine's

User ID: 23438707
United States
12/08/2012 11:09 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
It's a lot that is happening at once, you're their strength part of this is they are probably leaning on you and you're giving all you have. The sadness can snowball though to the point where you can't help the animals or once the animals are gone you aren't able to be there for your family. Maybe think about counseling or talking to someone about this who isn't a co-caretaker to the animals just to get perspective may help.
 Quoting: CeeLite


Thanks, I'm thinking of going to pet-grief counseling.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 6493463


There's a book called, "Good Bye, My Friend," that you might be interested in. There's also a workbook that might help you, with some resources for additional help if you need it. The workbook is a PDF online at:
[link to www.vetspecialty.com]
CeeLite

User ID: 1482671
United States
12/08/2012 11:10 PM

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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Rainbow Bridge poem: (warning: will make you cry)
[link to www.rainbowbridge.com]
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 6493463
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12/08/2012 11:10 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
((((HUGS))))
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29210797


Aw... Hug feels good.
myeyesropenow42

User ID: 2704006
United States
12/08/2012 11:12 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
When my dogs die I will not bring anymore animals in my life because of the sadness you are experiencing.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 6493463
United States
12/08/2012 11:14 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Rainbow Bridge poem: (warning: will make you cry)
[link to www.rainbowbridge.com]
 Quoting: CeeLite


Lordy I can't stand that poem. Even when my pets were young and vigorous it made me cry.

I think some people have a bigger sense of tragedy. My father was like that. As he got into his 80s he cried a lot. Sometimes it was about people he'd lost but sometimes it was about a song or a poem. There was some little song about Jesus and how the other children didn't want to play with him. That just tore him up.

Like someone posted above, it seems "ridiculous" to be so tuned in to tragedy. It can't be adaptive. But some of us are. I wonder did I inherit it from my dad or did I learn it from him?
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 6493463
United States
12/08/2012 11:15 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Rainbow Bridge poem: (warning: will make you cry)
[link to www.rainbowbridge.com]
 Quoting: CeeLite


Lordy I can't stand that poem. Even when my pets were young and vigorous it made me cry.

I think some people have a bigger sense of tragedy. My father was like that. As he got into his 80s he cried a lot. Sometimes it was about people he'd lost but sometimes it was about a song or a poem. There was some little song about Jesus and how the other children didn't want to play with him. That just tore him up.

Like someone posted above, it seems "ridiculous" to be so tuned in to tragedy. It can't be adaptive. But some of us are. I wonder did I inherit it from my dad or did I learn it from him?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 6493463


Just to clarify, The Rainbow Bridge is a BEAUTIFUL poem. I didn't mean to put it down. Just that it's SO beautiful it's kind of unbearable.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 6493463
United States
12/08/2012 11:18 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
When my dogs die I will not bring anymore animals in my life because of the sadness you are experiencing.
 Quoting: myeyesropenow42


I'm thinking about that too. Maybe I'll volunteer at the local shelter and try to help as many as possible. But stay emotionally distant. And as someone above suggested, make memorial donations.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 6493463
United States
12/08/2012 11:19 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
It's a lot that is happening at once, you're their strength part of this is they are probably leaning on you and you're giving all you have. The sadness can snowball though to the point where you can't help the animals or once the animals are gone you aren't able to be there for your family. Maybe think about counseling or talking to someone about this who isn't a co-caretaker to the animals just to get perspective may help.
 Quoting: CeeLite


Thanks, I'm thinking of going to pet-grief counseling.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 6493463


There's a book called, "Good Bye, My Friend," that you might be interested in. There's also a workbook that might help you, with some resources for additional help if you need it. The workbook is a PDF online at:
[link to www.vetspecialty.com]
 Quoting: Nine's


THANK YOU for that. I will go and look at it next.
hf
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 6493463
United States
12/08/2012 11:21 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Reading your post made my heart drop to my stomach again. My last dog died from cancer. Have read many others on here with the same problems and the pain they endure. The humans, not the animals.

It seems to not bother the animals as much as it does us. Humans worry, think about the future, think of life without them, think of their pain. Animals are happy to be with you and happy for kindness, love,food, and just being with us.

When my dog neared the time I'd have to help him leave, I'd talk to him and tell him when he felt too bad to go on, it was fine to leave. That I'd be fine without him. It made me feel like I was lying to tell him that, because it didn't feel at all that I'd be fine, but it felt like something he'd like to hear...and believe.

Wish there were words of comfort for you OP. How I wish. It's so hard to go through. Know you aren't alone. There's always someone going through the same thing. It's a terrible problem. May your journey, as well as your loved animals, be as pain free as possible. :Sadone:
 Quoting: Nine's


Wow I can't respond to this one right now. Eyes full of tears.
Perseus7

User ID: 29317919
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12/08/2012 11:24 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
take heart. you can cure them with cannabis oil.
1s 2s 2p 3s 3p 4s 3d 4p 5s 4d 5p 6s 4f 5d 6p 7s 5f 6d 7p
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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12/08/2012 11:25 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
take heart. you can cure them with cannabis oil.
 Quoting: Perseus7


Really?!?
ANHEDONIC

User ID: 26795689
United States
12/08/2012 11:27 PM

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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Humans are the only species on this Earth that lives with a psychological fear of death even independent of any actual threats to our existence - a conditioned preoccupation with our own physical mortality.

Animals are not this way. They do not live in fear of death. Their physical passing is every bit as natural to them as their other innate instincts. So I think it's important to understand that your animals do not carry the same psychological burden of fear that we humans possess when it comes to our mortality. To acknowledge this is to acknowledge that your pets/companions do not live in fear of their fate, they are not scared - so you should not be scared or live in fear for them.

As far as your attachment is concerned, that is understandable. If you had to live your life over again, would you want to exclude these companions from your life so you would not have to face these difficult times? Or would you place a much greater value and emphasis on all the positive times and memories that you shared with your furry friends? That is where your attention should be, on valuing the positive. Don't let what you perceive to be negative situation override the years of positive memories you have. It's difficult to keep this in perspective but it's true. If you were weighing your positive vs. negative experiences with your pets, there is no denying that the 'good' far outweighs the 'bad'.

I feel that all living beings are climbing up the evolutionary ladder of consciousness in the process of incarnating here on Earth. It sounds like you have provided your pets with much love & affection, and I believe this serves the greater purpose and goes such a long way in helping them along their path of growth & advancement. The same way that we might look upon a parent or role model in our lives that helped us along our way. Be thankful that your pets were a part of your life in the same manner that they are thankful that you were a part of theirs. We will all have to shed these physical bodies when our time comes, as that is inevitable. However the energy (consciousness) that gives us our life force - it never dissipates, only relocates. : )

A relative's dog that I was close with had suffered from complications from a seizure or stroke. I was visiting them when he took a turn for the worse and in the dog's last act, he mustered up the strength to get up and walk across the room and lay down at my feet before he passed away a few minutes later. As sad as it was I was so touched by his last act of companionship before he passed! I have an 8 year old dog now who is my best friend and I know it won't be easy for me when his time comes but I feel that I am at peace with the process and will be ready to handle the challenge when the time comes. I think you are stronger than you give yourself credit for and you'll make it through this and come out even stronger than you were before.

hf

Last Edited by ANHEDONIC on 12/08/2012 11:55 PM

"You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger"
Nine's

User ID: 23438707
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12/08/2012 11:28 PM
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Re: I am sad all the time - Can someone help me?
Wow I can't respond to this one right now. Eyes full of tears.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 6493463


No, please don't respond. No need to. Just know you're in many hearts right now, and our thoughts and prayers are with you.

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