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dating question for men / women welcome advice

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28867210
United States
12/09/2012 11:24 PM
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Re: dating question for men / women welcome advice
i would like as many opinions as possible...


i dont feel like what i did was wrong
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


It was not wrong. you are not married, so you have no strings, but what you did made it clear to her how you really feel about her and your future together. perhaps you do not even understand that.

like I said earlier, she'll probably stay, but believe me, she will start looking. she'll take her time, no doubt, as good men are hard to find, but she has been betrayed. you have no idea how the female mind operates, do you?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28867210


if she asked around about trish to my friends is that her betraying me; ? She did this after I went to the movies which was embaressing because my friends blew it out of proportion.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


no, she did not betray you. she was simply looking for information on the other woman.

trust me, she has already started "operation find a man", she has two reasons; YOU and that ho, Trish that went to the movies with you. You've basically humiliated her. Good job. Nothing like some good solid humiliation to ruin a relationship for good. No turning back on that type of behavior.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 23231420
United States
12/09/2012 11:25 PM
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Re: dating question for men / women welcome advice
i would like as many opinions as possible...


i dont feel like what i did was wrong
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


It was not wrong. you are not married, so you have no strings, but what you did made it clear to her how you really feel about her and your future together. perhaps you do not even understand that.

like I said earlier, she'll probably stay, but believe me, she will start looking. she'll take her time, no doubt, as good men are hard to find, but she has been betrayed. you have no idea how the female mind operates, do you?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28867210


if she asked around about trish to my friends is that her betraying me; ? She did this after I went to the movies which was embaressing because my friends blew it out of proportion.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


no thats what she should do.I doubt she got the impression you were going to have her best interests at heart so shes looking out for herself in case besides doing what you did, you werent telling the whole truth either.Thats not betraying,dont try find something to blame her about when you caused the whole problem.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29462072


but I think she knew it would cause a problem
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28867210
United States
12/09/2012 11:28 PM
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Re: dating question for men / women welcome advice
I am also really curious to know what she might be thinking right now...

what would you do if you were her...

would you still date me?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


let me repeat this...

MOST women would stay. They would stay until they found a better man.

Women are not generally stupid when it comes to this type of stuff. We are stealth in our plans to depart. And when it happens, you won't see it coming.

She's probably texting your best guy friend looking for a shoulder to cry on...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28867210
United States
12/09/2012 11:29 PM
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...


It was not wrong. you are not married, so you have no strings, but what you did made it clear to her how you really feel about her and your future together. perhaps you do not even understand that.

like I said earlier, she'll probably stay, but believe me, she will start looking. she'll take her time, no doubt, as good men are hard to find, but she has been betrayed. you have no idea how the female mind operates, do you?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28867210


if she asked around about trish to my friends is that her betraying me; ? She did this after I went to the movies which was embaressing because my friends blew it out of proportion.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


no thats what she should do.I doubt she got the impression you were going to have her best interests at heart so shes looking out for herself in case besides doing what you did, you werent telling the whole truth either.Thats not betraying,dont try find something to blame her about when you caused the whole problem.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29462072


but I think she knew it would cause a problem
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


you have no idea... no idea.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 23231420
United States
12/09/2012 11:30 PM
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Re: dating question for men / women welcome advice
I am also really curious to know what she might be thinking right now...

what would you do if you were her...

would you still date me?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


let me repeat this...

MOST women would stay. They would stay until they found a better man.

Women are not generally stupid when it comes to this type of stuff. We are stealth in our plans to depart. And when it happens, you won't see it coming.

She's probably texting your best guy friend looking for a shoulder to cry on...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28867210


Just out of curiousness?
would it be the same answer if she was me and I was she...

what would the men of glp do if it was a women that did this to you?
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 23231420
United States
12/09/2012 11:31 PM
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...


if she asked around about trish to my friends is that her betraying me; ? She did this after I went to the movies which was embaressing because my friends blew it out of proportion.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


no thats what she should do.I doubt she got the impression you were going to have her best interests at heart so shes looking out for herself in case besides doing what you did, you werent telling the whole truth either.Thats not betraying,dont try find something to blame her about when you caused the whole problem.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29462072


but I think she knew it would cause a problem
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


you have no idea... no idea.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28867210


can you elaborate...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 17378633
United States
12/09/2012 11:31 PM
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If i was your girlfriend i would hope i would respect you and trust you enough to let you go do whatever you want. If you cheat on me physically or emotionaly and i find out about it then you can eat shit and i will never talk to you or see you again. I wany to be with.someone I make happy and if you want someone else than I will.move the fick on no problem.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29462072
Australia
12/09/2012 11:33 PM
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...


It was not wrong. you are not married, so you have no strings, but what you did made it clear to her how you really feel about her and your future together. perhaps you do not even understand that.

like I said earlier, she'll probably stay, but believe me, she will start looking. she'll take her time, no doubt, as good men are hard to find, but she has been betrayed. you have no idea how the female mind operates, do you?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28867210


if she asked around about trish to my friends is that her betraying me; ? She did this after I went to the movies which was embaressing because my friends blew it out of proportion.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420

omg.you CAUSED the problem by going out with Trish.everything after that is an effect, including her asking about it.You cant have a go at your GF for reacting in anyway to something dum that YOU did.lol
foresight is a skill, i think maybe you need to learn it.
and yep id never have taken your calls or seen you again after youd hung up and gone out with another female and i was obviously upset.To me, you have shown you didnt have my best interests at heart and that i couldnt trust you.so yep id end it.
no thats what she should do.I doubt she got the impression you were going to have her best interests at heart so shes looking out for herself in case besides doing what you did, you werent telling the whole truth either.Thats not betraying,dont try find something to blame her about when you caused the whole problem.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29462072


but I think she knew it would cause a problem
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 6750590
United States
12/09/2012 11:33 PM
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Re: dating question for men / women welcome advice
Bring your girlfriend along too and tell her you want this girl in your life as a friend.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 23231420
United States
12/09/2012 11:34 PM
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If i was your girlfriend i would hope i would respect you and trust you enough to let you go do whatever you want. If you cheat on me physically or emotionaly and i find out about it then you can eat shit and i will never talk to you or see you again. I wany to be with.someone I make happy and if you want someone else than I will.move the fick on no problem.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 17378633


So you would stay with me? and You would expect the freedom to see movies with your guy friends in a relationship, and this is normal?

Does anyone else agree with this?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29517597
United States
12/09/2012 11:35 PM
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Is it ok for me to go to the movies with this girl that used to like me? I have been dating my girlfriend for 2 and a half years...

about a year ago my friend trish started hitting on me. I told her I just want to be friends because I love my girlfriend. And she (trish) is coming to town and wanted to catch a movie (mind you), that she is in town for a conference.

So does my girlfriend have a right to be mad at me for going to the movie with this girl?

It was a year ago, that she hit on me. I need friends in my life and don't get out that often so I went to the movie with her...

Nothing happened. But was I wrong?

would you be mad at your boyfriend or break up with him over this?

I feel like shes over reacting but if you were dating me, what would you have expected...
 Quoting: anon 23231420


putin
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 23231420
United States
12/09/2012 11:35 PM
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Bring your girlfriend along too and tell her you want this girl in your life as a friend.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 6750590


I asked her if she wanted to meet trish. She didn't but it was after trish was hitting on me.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 23231420
United States
12/09/2012 11:36 PM
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Is it ok for me to go to the movies with this girl that used to like me? I have been dating my girlfriend for 2 and a half years...

about a year ago my friend trish started hitting on me. I told her I just want to be friends because I love my girlfriend. And she (trish) is coming to town and wanted to catch a movie (mind you), that she is in town for a conference.

So does my girlfriend have a right to be mad at me for going to the movie with this girl?

It was a year ago, that she hit on me. I need friends in my life and don't get out that often so I went to the movie with her...

Nothing happened. But was I wrong?

would you be mad at your boyfriend or break up with him over this?

I feel like shes over reacting but if you were dating me, what would you have expected...
 Quoting: anon 23231420


putin
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29517597


Can you elaborate...?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29462072
Australia
12/09/2012 11:41 PM
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...


It was not wrong. you are not married, so you have no strings, but what you did made it clear to her how you really feel about her and your future together. perhaps you do not even understand that.

like I said earlier, she'll probably stay, but believe me, she will start looking. she'll take her time, no doubt, as good men are hard to find, but she has been betrayed. you have no idea how the female mind operates, do you?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28867210


if she asked around about trish to my friends is that her betraying me; ? She did this after I went to the movies which was embaressing because my friends blew it out of proportion.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


no thats what she should do.I doubt she got the impression you were going to have her best interests at heart so shes looking out for herself in case besides doing what you did, you werent telling the whole truth either.Thats not betraying,dont try find something to blame her about when you caused the whole problem.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29462072


but I think she knew it would cause a problem
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


omg.you CAUSED the problem by going out with Trish.everything after that is an effect, including her asking about it.You cant have a go at your GF for reacting in anyway to something dum that YOU did.lol
foresight is a skill, i think maybe you need to learn it.
and yep id never have taken your calls or seen you again after youd hung up and gone out with another female and i was obviously upset.To me, you have shown you didnt have my best interests at heart and that i couldnt trust you.so yep id end it.

(sorry mucked quotes up by not scrolling far enough in my last reply)
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28867210
United States
12/09/2012 11:44 PM
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...


no thats what she should do.I doubt she got the impression you were going to have her best interests at heart so shes looking out for herself in case besides doing what you did, you werent telling the whole truth either.Thats not betraying,dont try find something to blame her about when you caused the whole problem.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29462072


but I think she knew it would cause a problem
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


you have no idea... no idea.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28867210


can you elaborate...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420

clearly you do not understand that if this bother's your gf, you need to deny yourself that female friend (trish) and explain to the friend that your gf is upset at the idea of you taking another woman to the movies and that out of respect to the gf, you cannot see her.

I would further ask yourself, what is it about trish that makes you want to be friends with her... usually when a guy and girl are in a relationship and living together, they are pretty much committed to each other and opposite sex friends are hopefully enjoyed together in a group setting, not separately in a dark movie theater.

some people have no problem with their significant others being in the company of the opposite sex, others go ballistic.

lots of people have plenty of opposite sex friends in the workplace, but they have boundaries on what and where they can actually interact in.

grow up, if you really love and value your gf, you would not want to hurt her.

Me personally, I would not be hurt. But I would be well on my way to searching for my next boyfriend.

5a
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28867210
United States
12/09/2012 11:47 PM
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Re: dating question for men / women welcome advice
Bring your girlfriend along too and tell her you want this girl in your life as a friend.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 6750590


I asked her if she wanted to meet trish. She didn't but it was after trish was hitting on me.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


OP, you are pathetic.

And you will most likely be alone. First of all, Tish is a home wrecker and your GF doesn't want to meet some ho that is jockeying for a chance at her boyfriend.
CowgirlK

User ID: 29001593
United States
12/09/2012 11:48 PM

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any more opinions from anyone are welcome...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


Its real simple OP...Relationships are built on TRUST.

If she can not/will not trust you to go the the movies with an old "friend" then you have a bigger problem than you think.

Does she trust you to go to work, the store, the bar? If you were going to cheat on her I'm sure you have plenty of opportunities.

If she can't deal with honesty and truth, or if she insecure and jealous, maybe it's time for you to have a long conversation with her.....or move on.

hf
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 23231420
United States
12/09/2012 11:48 PM
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thanks everyone for posting. its really helping me get the big picture
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 23231420
United States
12/09/2012 11:50 PM
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any more opinions from anyone are welcome...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


Its real simple OP...Relationships are built on TRUST.

If she can not/will not trust you to go the the movies with an old "friend" then you have a bigger problem than you think.

Does she trust you to go to work, the store, the bar? If you were going to cheat on her I'm sure you have plenty of opportunities.

If she can't deal with honesty and truth, or if she insecure and jealous, maybe it's time for you to have a long conversation with her.....or move on.

hf
 Quoting: CowgirlK


no its just trish that bothers her. Or girls that hit on me in general...

Theres been a couple, but I draw a line, when It bothers her.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28867210
United States
12/09/2012 11:51 PM
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If i was your girlfriend i would hope i would respect you and trust you enough to let you go do whatever you want. If you cheat on me physically or emotionaly and i find out about it then you can eat shit and i will never talk to you or see you again. I wany to be with.someone I make happy and if you want someone else than I will.move the fick on no problem.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 17378633


So you would stay with me? and You would expect the freedom to see movies with your guy friends in a relationship, and this is normal?

Does anyone else agree with this?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


I have yet to meet a man who would allow his significant other to go to a dark movie theater with a guy friend who once hit on her in the past.

You are a fucking moron.

You know how you know you love someone? You cannot fathom them being in the danger zone of gaining the attention or affection of another person, especially when you could have stopped it.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28867210
United States
12/09/2012 11:56 PM
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I can remember a time when I was living with my boyfriend and an old guy friend called to invite me to a family event. My boyfriend's look on his face was so sad when I asked him if he would mind if I did the guy friend a favor and attend the event with him since it was a family type thing and I knew them so well.

I didn't think twice about declining the invitation with the old guy friend s my boyfriend was far more important to me.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28867210
United States
12/09/2012 11:58 PM
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any more opinions from anyone are welcome...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


Its real simple OP...Relationships are built on TRUST.

If she can not/will not trust you to go the the movies with an old "friend" then you have a bigger problem than you think.

Does she trust you to go to work, the store, the bar? If you were going to cheat on her I'm sure you have plenty of opportunities.

If she can't deal with honesty and truth, or if she insecure and jealous, maybe it's time for you to have a long conversation with her.....or move on.

hf
 Quoting: CowgirlK


no its just trish that bothers her. Or girls that hit on me in general...

Theres been a couple, but I draw a line, when It bothers her.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


so let us get this straight... you have no guy friends to be your wingmen, but you are so hot, girls just keep hitting on you.

good night, OP.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 23231420
United States
12/10/2012 12:02 AM
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Re: dating question for men / women welcome advice
any more opinions from anyone are welcome...
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


Its real simple OP...Relationships are built on TRUST.

If she can not/will not trust you to go the the movies with an old "friend" then you have a bigger problem than you think.

Does she trust you to go to work, the store, the bar? If you were going to cheat on her I'm sure you have plenty of opportunities.

If she can't deal with honesty and truth, or if she insecure and jealous, maybe it's time for you to have a long conversation with her.....or move on.

hf
 Quoting: CowgirlK


no its just trish that bothers her. Or girls that hit on me in general...

Theres been a couple, but I draw a line, when It bothers her.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


so let us get this straight... you have no guy friends to be your wingmen, but you are so hot, girls just keep hitting on you.

good night, OP.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28867210


over 5 years 3 girls have hit on me.

Yes most of my friends are now getting married, in college, or over sea's.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28920579
United States
12/10/2012 12:06 AM
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ARE YOU FREAKIN STUPID?????????
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1707881


I know, right? There is no flippin excuse for just plain stupid. How would you feel if the shoe was on the other
Old MacDonald

User ID: 28707337
Canada
12/10/2012 12:11 AM
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if you go to the movies with Trish...

your girl will be sucking someone's elses cock within 12 hours...

is that what you want?

you want another man with his hands on/in your girl?

is that what you want?!

you fucktard... stay with the girl you "love"
 Quoting: Dr. Acula


1rof1

Probably a BBC too !

bananasex
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Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28867210
United States
12/10/2012 12:13 AM
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...


Its real simple OP...Relationships are built on TRUST.

If she can not/will not trust you to go the the movies with an old "friend" then you have a bigger problem than you think.

Does she trust you to go to work, the store, the bar? If you were going to cheat on her I'm sure you have plenty of opportunities.

If she can't deal with honesty and truth, or if she insecure and jealous, maybe it's time for you to have a long conversation with her.....or move on.

hf
 Quoting: CowgirlK


no its just trish that bothers her. Or girls that hit on me in general...

Theres been a couple, but I draw a line, when It bothers her.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


so let us get this straight... you have no guy friends to be your wingmen, but you are so hot, girls just keep hitting on you.

good night, OP.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28867210


over 5 years 3 girls have hit on me.

Yes most of my friends are now getting married, in college, or over sea's.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 23231420


OP, I think you know the answer to your own questions.

you are a guy who already has a live in girl friend seeking friendship with another girl who. Its common knowledge that men do not want friendship with women, they want sex.

Perhaps you just need to be single so you can have all the female 'friends' you want.

I am total believer in friendships. I think they are important, but not at the cost of hurting someone who is obviously upset that a woman who once hit on you is moving in on her territory again.

That's all I can add. I think maybe you are just one of those guys who is afraid to be alone and not really in love? otherwise why hurt your gf?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 26333321
Philippines
12/10/2012 12:56 AM
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Would you be upset if your GF went out to a movie with someone who has hit on her? Do you (even on a subconscious level) value the extra emotion/attention you get from these 2 women when this particular scenario arises? If you have no friends and a deep need for them, maybe you're doing this for much needed emotional interaction.
If you're a lonely guy, be smart and dignified about it. It seems desperate to hold on to a situation that could hurt your GF just so you can have night out with friend.

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