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BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.

 
zimmertrevenlin
User ID: 6474499
United States
12/13/2012 12:18 PM
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BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
Seems like a lot of people are taking ascension into their own hands in preparation for 12/21.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29724868
United Kingdom
12/13/2012 12:19 PM
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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
Erm, one can buy a suicide kit online?
I wonder what the picture on the front looks like.
Pyractomena borealis

User ID: 20793638
United States
12/13/2012 12:31 PM
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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
Oh my.

Creepy as hell, but I guess where there is money to be made Satan sees opportunity.
There is nothing so powerful as truth, and often nothing so strange ~ Daniel Webster

Omnia Vincit Amor ~ Virgil

The more you learn, the less you know ~ Socrates

That writer does the most, who gives his reader the most knowledge, and takes from him the least time. ~ Charles Caleb Colton
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 976158
Germany
12/13/2012 12:32 PM
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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
link! fuckstick!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 14443159
United States
12/13/2012 12:33 PM
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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
Erm, one can buy a suicide kit online?
I wonder what the picture on the front looks like.
 Quoting: mkscrewup


Your avatar
cruise
Pyractomena borealis

User ID: 20793638
United States
12/13/2012 12:34 PM
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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
link! fuckstick!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 976158


Yea,, that too!

My fist thought actually, but these are Onion times so nothing would surprise me.

Last Edited by Pyractomena borealis on 12/13/2012 12:35 PM
There is nothing so powerful as truth, and often nothing so strange ~ Daniel Webster

Omnia Vincit Amor ~ Virgil

The more you learn, the less you know ~ Socrates

That writer does the most, who gives his reader the most knowledge, and takes from him the least time. ~ Charles Caleb Colton
Jimb0

User ID: 17671175
United States
12/13/2012 06:08 PM
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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
[link to articles.latimes.com]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 16428391
Australia
12/13/2012 06:13 PM
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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
Erm, one can buy a suicide kit online?
I wonder what the picture on the front looks like.
 Quoting: mkscrewup


All their kits come with a lifetime gaurantee too.

Half price for return customers.
Jimb0

User ID: 17671175
United States
12/13/2012 06:21 PM
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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
Erm, one can buy a suicide kit online?
I wonder what the picture on the front looks like.
 Quoting: mkscrewup


All their kits come with a lifetime gaurantee too.

Half price for return customers.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 16428391


chuckle
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 9038715
United States
12/13/2012 06:25 PM
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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
Ascension IS NOT suicide.... is this gonna be the new angle.....????
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29724868
United Kingdom
12/14/2012 03:41 AM
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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
Ascension IS NOT suicide.... is this gonna be the new angle.....????
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9038715


For some suicide is probably easier than admitting they were wrong.
Dr. AstroModerator
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User ID: 2400785
United States
12/14/2012 03:59 AM

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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
Ascension IS NOT suicide.... is this gonna be the new angle.....????
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9038715


For some suicide is probably easier than admitting they were wrong.
 Quoting: mkscrewup


Suicide cults like heaven's gate redefine the term suicide, so they don't admit that they're going to commit suicide. Heaven's gate for example defined suicide as "not accepting the gift" and ascending. Ask the guy who says he's going to jump off a mountain on the 21st and he'll also tell you he's not committing suicide, he'll tell you he's jumping through a portal to save the world.
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Nyarlathotep

User ID: 20053617
United States
12/14/2012 04:11 AM

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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
Ascension IS NOT suicide.... is this gonna be the new angle.....????
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9038715


For some suicide is probably easier than admitting they were wrong.
 Quoting: mkscrewup


Suicide cults like heaven's gate redefine the term suicide, so they don't admit that they're going to commit suicide. Heaven's gate for example defined suicide as "not accepting the gift" and ascending. Ask the guy who says he's going to jump off a mountain on the 21st and he'll also tell you he's not committing suicide, he'll tell you he's jumping through a portal to save the world.
 Quoting: Dr. Astro


How much you want to bed that if all is said and done with 2012, some conspiracy theorists will theorize that he may have been right and saved them via this action.
Devoted Follower
User ID: 28055738
United States
12/14/2012 04:14 AM
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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
damned
Dr. AstroModerator
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User ID: 4211721
United States
12/14/2012 04:29 AM

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Re: BREAKING: MASSIVE: online sales of suicide/ascension kits soar.
Ascension IS NOT suicide.... is this gonna be the new angle.....????
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 9038715


For some suicide is probably easier than admitting they were wrong.
 Quoting: mkscrewup


Suicide cults like heaven's gate redefine the term suicide, so they don't admit that they're going to commit suicide. Heaven's gate for example defined suicide as "not accepting the gift" and ascending. Ask the guy who says he's going to jump off a mountain on the 21st and he'll also tell you he's not committing suicide, he'll tell you he's jumping through a portal to save the world.
 Quoting: Dr. Astro


How much you want to bed that if all is said and done with 2012, some conspiracy theorists will theorize that he may have been right and saved them via this action.
 Quoting: Nyarlathotep


I'm sure. There are people related to those who killed themselves in Heaven's Gate and even "survivors" of the cult itself who still believe the cult was right and that their friends and loved ones actually "ascended" to comet hale-bopp!
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