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Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28319754
United States
12/16/2012 12:02 AM
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Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
My friend is going through yet another rough patch with her husband. I've gave sound advice in the past but this time I'm confused! Here are the details: they've been together 18 years. He's cheated at the fist start of relationship (few months into relationship) they got over that mess. 3 years into relationship broke up (he slept with 3 women 1 month time span but were broken up) got back together and pregnate a month later... After few years many friends say he's in bars and such. Fast forward many stories... He's been caught red handed in bar and lusting after women. at a party a person made a comment where a prostitute was conducting business, she caught him in the parking lot (it was a gas station,so she felt doubtful) she's asked him for lie detector test and he flat out refuses!

Now I've explain in the past, start of a new relationship mistakes, the fact they were broken up and maybe coffee at gas station (althought he heard news about prostutite few hours prior.... I tried to make her see all sides first before jumping into a decision.... But this lie detector test... He has a history and with the doubt... Wouldn't he want to prove innocence? I'd just like some opinions before I weigh in.... I'm clueless! And of course this hurts because I do think the worst! :) thanks for any input! Oh!!! They are married 7 years I think...
dmore4

User ID: 22731168
12/16/2012 12:07 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
ONCE A CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER
JUST HERE

User ID: 25610447
United States
12/16/2012 12:10 AM

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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
are you a male friend or a woman friend?
:glp sign:
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19980561
United States
12/16/2012 12:11 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
ONCE A CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER
 Quoting: dmore4


Yup. I vote dump him & move on. His new wife or G/F will find herself in this very same predicament.
scorpio66

User ID: 2453057
United States
12/16/2012 12:16 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
He probably is cheating but probably figures she'll forgive him again as always and isn't too worried or hopes she'll finally get mad enough to be the one to end it.
jj24seven (OP)

User ID: 28319754
United States
12/16/2012 12:21 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
are you a male friend or a woman friend?
 Quoting: JUST HERE


i'm a woman and so is my friend...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 30004311
United States
12/16/2012 12:24 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
worry about your own snatch.
jj24seven (OP)

User ID: 28319754
United States
12/16/2012 12:26 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
worry about your own snatch.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30004311


and you worry about yours!
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 28319754
United States
12/16/2012 12:28 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
are you a male friend or a woman friend?
 Quoting: JUST HERE


Female
Mad Pole

User ID: 20676524
United States
12/16/2012 12:29 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
go to your friend and husband, sit them down and tell them you came to a conspiracy site to ask opinions on where he was cheating or not. Then accuse him.

If you can't do that, then get your nose out of their marriage.
Mommas youngest getting paper like the oldest one.. We living better guess God felt he owed us one.

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Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1034800
United States
12/16/2012 12:33 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
She should definitely get out of the relationship. Why would anybody want to be with a low life like that anyway? She should think about the diseases she could get.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 28319754
United States
12/16/2012 12:33 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
go to your friend and husband, sit them down and tell them you came to a conspiracy site to ask opinions on where he was cheating or not. Then accuse him.

If you can't do that, then get your nose out of their marriage.
 Quoting: Mad Pole


Lmao! What better place to get points of view! Oh, and she knows I'm hooked on this place and asked her for a few hours research. She has no one, no family or friends.... I'd at least like to try and help her feel better!
Anonymous Coward
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United States
12/16/2012 12:36 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
Myob
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 17332110
Canada
12/16/2012 12:37 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
I suspect a few friends are being cheated on.

Unless you have concrete evidence, stay out of it. You risk loosing a friend and making yourself look like an asshole.



Queen Latifah is in this one.
Useless Cookie Eater

User ID: 29696048
United States
12/16/2012 12:38 AM

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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
go to your friend and husband, sit them down and tell them you came to a conspiracy site to ask opinions on where he was cheating or not. Then accuse him.

If you can't do that, then get your nose out of their marriage.
 Quoting: Mad Pole


Lmao! What better place to get points of view! Oh, and she knows I'm hooked on this place and asked her for a few hours research. She has no one, no family or friends.... I'd at least like to try and help her feel better!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28319754


Well....now at least we know why she continues to cling to this piece of sh*t.

...and obvious self esteem issues.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 28319754
United States
12/16/2012 12:40 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
I just can't wrap my head around the fact that a person would refuse a lie detector when it could help.... Unless guilty. I don't want to see her waste her life away, she's a really good person... She did make him leave the house and refuses to let him back until test is submitted... I keep trying to put myself in his place and all I can conclude is guilty! He told her it won't fix anything if he takes one.... She seems to think it would help her to trust him and get rid of doubts.
His response "it won't fix anything" only leads me to believe something will come back as proof he cheated.... Like he already knows it will be a bad result
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 28319754
United States
12/16/2012 12:42 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
go to your friend and husband, sit them down and tell them you came to a conspiracy site to ask opinions on where he was cheating or not. Then accuse him.

If you can't do that, then get your nose out of their marriage.
 Quoting: Mad Pole


Lmao! What better place to get points of view! Oh, and she knows I'm hooked on this place and asked her for a few hours research. She has no one, no family or friends.... I'd at least like to try and help her feel better!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28319754


Well....now at least we know why she continues to cling to this piece of sh*t.

...and obvious self esteem issues.
 Quoting: Useless Cookie Eater


That was what I thought too when she came to me and opened up.... I have to at least have some sort of response... I don't want to leave her without some type of support
Useless Cookie Eater

User ID: 29696048
United States
12/16/2012 12:43 AM

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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
I just can't wrap my head around the fact that a person would refuse a lie detector when it could help.... Unless guilty. I don't want to see her waste her life away, she's a really good person... She did make him leave the house and refuses to let him back until test is submitted... I keep trying to put myself in his place and all I can conclude is guilty! He told her it won't fix anything if he takes one.... She seems to think it would help her to trust him and get rid of doubts.
His response "it won't fix anything" only leads me to believe something will come back as proof he cheated.... Like he already knows it will be a bad result
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28319754


If you have to ask your husband to take a lie detector in a marriage....the marriage and relationship is/are ALREADY over.


clues

Last Edited by Useless Cookie Eater on 12/16/2012 12:43 AM
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 28319754
United States
12/16/2012 12:46 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
I suspect a few friends are being cheated on.

Unless you have concrete evidence, stay out of it. You risk loosing a friend and making yourself look like an asshole.



Queen Latifah is in this one.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 17332110


Good point! I didn't consider that yet! Ugh! Yucky feeling
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 17332110
Canada
12/16/2012 12:52 AM
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Re: Opinions needed! Possible cheater in friends marriage
I suspect a few friends are being cheated on.

Unless you have concrete evidence, stay out of it. You risk loosing a friend and making yourself look like an asshole.



Queen Latifah is in this one.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 17332110


Good point! I didn't consider that yet! Ugh! Yucky feeling
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28319754


Cheaters are good liers. Otherwise they wouldn't be cheating.

If you approach her about this, she's just gonna tell him.

And he's going to lie, control her and demonize you as the bad friend with jealousy issues.

It's times of stress that show you who you really are. Like war or relationships.

Be cool.

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