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When your spouse is no more than a roommate, is it time to go?

 
DanG
User ID: 22108338
United States
12/21/2012 07:35 PM
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Re: When your spouse is no more than a roommate, is it time to go?
Honest question. I feel like loading my shit and leaving. No kids, just pets.
 Quoting: Justalittlebad


Hit the Road, Jack
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 30407148
United States
12/21/2012 07:41 PM
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Re: When your spouse is no more than a roommate, is it time to go?
Get out op while you can,barbie ant gonna change for you!
thats how barbie likes it,get it?
Its all about barbie...not you buddy!

Once you get out,she will move another in on your wind from the door flying closed.

Stinkin barbie bitches of the world sux!

And im a female but cant stand women like this!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28109015
United States
12/21/2012 08:00 PM
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Re: When your spouse is no more than a roommate, is it time to go?
If there is nothing holding you back and you are really done with it just leave. I would if I didn't have kids my partner is an asshole and we don't really love each other. Maybe you can be happy once you leave or you can talk it out and find a way to really try to work it out. I know how you feel some people just wont change and it's hard to fall back in love once your out of love. If they treat you nasty or just simply don't have feelings for them just leave maybe both of you will find someone who really loves you. hf don't regret what you could have done before its to late.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28100246
United States
12/21/2012 08:05 PM
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Re: When your spouse is no more than a roommate, is it time to go?
That's when real love kicks in. The party is over and hormones have been depleted. Look into the person you bonded with. Ask why you did it. Sex is over rated.

Familiarity breeds contempt. The third marriage works so well because the expectations are gone.

Do what you want, but the grass isn't always greener on the other side.

Better to work with what you got. Don't get to middle age and discover this. Save what you can.
 Quoting: PokerFace


This.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 17431247
United States
12/21/2012 08:14 PM
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Re: When your spouse is no more than a roommate, is it time to go?
Well I've been married for 10 yrs, together 11, and we've been living as roommates and/or enemies for a good 6 years and finally I am filing for divorce. We separated for a year and during that time I realized I was happier and less lonely than I was with him in the same home as me. We have two kids so it really hurts me that it had to come to this, but sometimes I think it really is irreparable. We have sooo much water under the bridge. No matter how many times we tried to start over and bury the past, it always came back into play somehow. And we lost respect for each other, which is sort of a death sentence for the marriage really. It's hard to get that back.

My goal now? To be on good terms with him even though he fucked me financially and left me with nothing for my kids and while he's got his future all taken care of. You men always say it's the other way around and that is B.S. HE is the one who walked away with money, not me. I am the one raising the kids whilst he begins his "new life" as he calls it. I know 2nd and 3rd marriages have an even lower success rate so I am very hesistant to even consider ever marrying again. I've been single for a year and really miss male interaction but I've used that time to grow and heal as a person. My advice is, if you walk away, DO give yourself a year. If somewhere along the way you try again at least you can feel you did try, and if it doesn't work out, don't rush into the arms (or bed) of someone else, you won't be ready and you'll only get hurt. Good luck.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28008747
United States
12/21/2012 08:27 PM
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Re: When your spouse is no more than a roommate, is it time to go?
That's when real love kicks in. The party is over and hormones have been depleted. Look into the person you bonded with. Ask why you did it. Sex is over rated.

Familiarity breeds contempt. The third marriage works so well because the expectations are gone.

Do what you want, but the grass isn't always greener on the other side.

Better to work with what you got. Don't get to middle age and discover this. Save what you can.
 Quoting: PokerFace


This is the second for both of us. 16 years this Dec. Part of the problem is I am married to a gal who has never had the time or room to have a kid. Barbie syndrome.

I am not guiltless. I do not blame her. The current situation is more my fault than hers. That being said, I am feeling like driving away back to my shop, and my hotel room 450 miles away, and let the chips fall where they may.
 Quoting: Justalittlebad


I guess that's it. You want kids, she doesn't. She probably hasn't got much fertility left anyway now.

Your time is ticking away. You may resent forever if you don't try to have kids. Maybe get a younger chick, either from here or overseas. There are plenty of females in the world who are willing to have kids by an american guy.

I am going against the grain here, but for whatever reason you are married to someone who you are incompatible with on this basic important question. What are you waiting for?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28008747
United States
12/21/2012 08:38 PM
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Re: When your spouse is no more than a roommate, is it time to go?
Well I've been married for 10 yrs, together 11, and we've been living as roommates and/or enemies for a good 6 years and finally I am filing for divorce. We separated for a year and during that time I realized I was happier and less lonely than I was with him in the same home as me. We have two kids so it really hurts me that it had to come to this, but sometimes I think it really is irreparable. We have sooo much water under the bridge. No matter how many times we tried to start over and bury the past, it always came back into play somehow. And we lost respect for each other, which is sort of a death sentence for the marriage really. It's hard to get that back.

My goal now? To be on good terms with him even though he fucked me financially and left me with nothing for my kids and while he's got his future all taken care of. You men always say it's the other way around and that is B.S. HE is the one who walked away with money, not me. I am the one raising the kids whilst he begins his "new life" as he calls it. I know 2nd and 3rd marriages have an even lower success rate so I am very hesistant to even consider ever marrying again. I've been single for a year and really miss male interaction but I've used that time to grow and heal as a person. My advice is, if you walk away, DO give yourself a year. If somewhere along the way you try again at least you can feel you did try, and if it doesn't work out, don't rush into the arms (or bed) of someone else, you won't be ready and you'll only get hurt. Good luck.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 17431247


Me, me, me. It could not be more clear. You have two kids so it hurts YOU to separate. But what the hell.

You never even mentioned the effect on the kids. Just that you're less lonely without him.

Hope he gets full custody.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 30583827
United States
12/21/2012 10:47 PM
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Re: When your spouse is no more than a roommate, is it time to go?
Been living that way for over twenty years. She has her tv upstairs and I have mine downstairs. It works for us.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28880325




There you go. Get rid of the tv sets. Nobody needs one.
People who are addicted to tv don't need other people anyway. They numb the mind. Seriously, they do nothing but brainwash and indoctrinate people. TV has no benefit, nothing but harm. I say get rid of the tv sets. If you don't, then what do you care...keep enjoying your separate lives cuddled up with your separate tv sets. Sounds like you're each married to your tv set.
Justalittlebad (OP)

User ID: 1391964
United States
12/22/2012 08:24 PM
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Re: When your spouse is no more than a roommate, is it time to go?
Get out op while you can,barbie ant gonna change for you!
thats how barbie likes it,get it?
Its all about barbie...not you buddy!

Once you get out,she will move another in on your wind from the door flying closed.

Stinkin barbie bitches of the world sux!

And im a female but cant stand women like this!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30407148


hf Thank you. I am heading back to my home away from home.
Justalittlebad/more or less
Justalittlebad (OP)

User ID: 1391964
United States
12/22/2012 08:31 PM
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Re: When your spouse is no more than a roommate, is it time to go?
We just had a talk. She was asking me what was wrong. I told her straight up how I feel. "We are nothing more than roommates". She agreed, saying the time we have been apart has caused a problem. The problem for me is she has no clue as to what makes me happy.

I am bailing on this situation....
Justalittlebad/more or less

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