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Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31010423
Germany
12/28/2012 08:31 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Well, my parents are shitty abusive assholes. Maybe that´s not the wrong but the right family though, since when you take the reincarnation angle, perhaps I really screwed up somewhere down the line and that´s what I get for it.
However, shit happens, so that´s that.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31018111
United States
12/28/2012 08:40 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Yes, I am RH negative and neither one of my parents are. Don't know if that's significant, but I've never felt a part of my family. I was ignored and neglected my whole life...treated like I wasn't a part. My "mother" felt more like a nanny to me than a mother.

I don't look like anyone. I don't think like them. My mother is still alive and at 90 she STILL feels like a stranger to me...and I'm 54.

But if I don't belong to them, I don't know where I came from.

Hell...maybe I was hatched.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 27500415
United States
12/28/2012 08:43 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
I just thought my family was weird.
Turns out they're not mine, thank god.

I third the "adopted" question.
 Quoting: Anti Vortex


Lol. I'm glad you found solace in being the only sane one in your family. I hope everything is good with you.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27500415


They were just really distant, like we were acquaintances. I tried to explain it away as their upbringing, but other kids with normal families thought it was weird that they didn't act like family and no one believed my story about them being fallen royalty (lol, I was a kid and I was trying). I spent so much time and effort trying to cover up that weirdness.

It's all good now though. I just don't ever speak to them.
 Quoting: Anti Vortex


My family was/is loving in general but on both sides, everyone is so aggressive, angry, hypocritical, stoic, this includes my own parents and siblings. and I feel like my happiness is no match for any of this.

Don't see this as a bad thing. Don't ever let anyone talk you into speaking to them unless you are ready or let it always be your choice to speak/not speak to them as long as it makes you happy. I'm so sick of hearing people telling me that I have to find a way to get along with family members because we are the same blood. Family usually causes the deepest wounds not strangers.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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12/28/2012 08:46 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
I too AM ADOPTED / and HAVE contact since 2000 . WEIRD
 Quoting: Lie Detector


I hope you've found some closure in all of this. Best regards.hf
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19490298
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12/28/2012 08:48 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Absolutely. My karma must have worked against to be raised by two brutal human beings. Next time around, I hope I have a choice of family. If you believe in reincarnation.
 Quoting: PokerFace


My parents were very strict, traditional, stubborn, never want to hear what I have to say, everything I do is wrong, everything they do is right and matters and NOTHING I do matters. Anything that matters to ME is useless and they'll only do something for me if THEY think it's important. They can also be very loving with great senses of humor which confuses the hell out of me. I didn't believe in reincarnation before but when started to feel like I didn't belong that I started to believe that my soul was somewhere else before. I then found out about reincarnation but I don't fully believe in it cuz it freaks me out. I hope you do find what you're looking for. Good luck mate. hfhfhf
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27500415


Thank you. I have peace now and much love. I don't think parents realize the power they have over their offspring. I wish parenting were something that was licensed only to those that truly want children and understand the love and work it requires to raise healthy kids.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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United States
12/28/2012 08:52 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
I always felt that way growing up and asked all the time if I was adopted which they denied. Turns out I was just asking the wrong question as I found out when I was 17 my real parents had just left me there and the babysitters raised me, I was never adopted but wasn't their's. I know, that sounds so crazy, yet it's true. Well, I mean, as true as it can be. I found my real parents in my 20s and they said the babysitters moved and gosh they couldn't ever find me again. I'll never know exactly what happened. But like someone else said above, finding out the 'babysitters' weren't my real family was the best moment of my life. I just knew it! I have little to no contact with the fake or real parents and haven't for a long, long time. I will say it was weird as it turned out my name I'd grown up using wasn't correct and was a paper work nightmare to get a DL and SSN even way back then. Anyway, I do think there is something inside us that just knows.
 Quoting: scorpio66


It's funny you say that, because I'd say as soon as I was aware that I existed, around 3-5yrs (it seems like a blur to me now). I remember asking myself, "how did I end up here?" nothing seemed familiar, not my family and not the house that I lived in either.

But yeah, your story is pretty crazy. I hope everthing is good and you're in a better place mentally.smile_hear
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31012764
Australia
12/28/2012 08:56 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
My parents are assholes
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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12/28/2012 09:00 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27500415


On my moms side... YES.
 Quoting: Jervis and V-Honey


Only one side? I've never heard of that before. If you feel that way, then it must be possible. It is maybe that your dad wasn't supposed to meet your mom. I hope you find closure and solace, everyone deserves to know where they come from. Given some people don't care but those that do, deserve an explanation and I hope you find it. cheers
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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12/28/2012 09:05 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Well, my parents are shitty abusive assholes. Maybe that´s not the wrong but the right family though, since when you take the reincarnation angle, perhaps I really screwed up somewhere down the line and that´s what I get for it.
However, shit happens, so that´s that.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31010423


Well that sucks. Just because they're your parents, doesn't mean you have to put up with their shitty attitudes. I've learned that the hard way and I fight for my right as a human being to stand up to my parents when it seems right or necessary. I can't say I'm always right but sometimes, my parents say things that are so messed up, when I offer an alternative, they say that I'm disobeying them and I'm talking back. *blech*

Don't let that be your ultimatum. Everyone deserves to be happy. Stay away from them if that's what makes you ahppy. Everyone deserves happiness.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 27500415
United States
12/29/2012 12:29 AM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
bump
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31071075
United Kingdom
12/29/2012 05:00 AM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
I've always felt the black sheep of my family.....My dad found it hard to love me, seems like he just wanted me out the way most of the time....even now our relationship is strained. The rest of my family I don't really see much of, used to be very close to my sister, but sadly other the years we have drifted apart now. I've always felt I've never fitted into my family.
prodlikegod

User ID: 7733994
United Kingdom
12/29/2012 05:14 AM

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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Me to I spent a lot of years wishing my
real parents would pick me up.
Left home when I was 16 and never went
Back or had contact for 15 years.
I would love to know the term for this.
Soma/Comatose
If you can’t convince them, confuse them.

User ID: 997239
United States
12/29/2012 06:15 AM

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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
No, but I've been embarrassed by my family so badly I wanted to find a new one.

When I was a kid, we all went to a nice Chinese restaurant for dinner one spring evening.

I was happily munching some sweet and sour shrimp when my step-father cut a small fart.

My mom proceeded to throw up all over the floor and then began yelling at him that he was gross.

I said "not nearly as gross as you puking all over the place" and I got up and moved to another table.

There ya have it.

WTF098
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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12/29/2012 08:40 AM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
I've always felt the black sheep of my family.....My dad found it hard to love me, seems like he just wanted me out the way most of the time....even now our relationship is strained. The rest of my family I don't really see much of, used to be very close to my sister, but sadly other the years we have drifted apart now. I've always felt I've never fitted into my family.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31071075


You know what I'm thinking about? I feel like a lot of people aren't ready to start families yet they do because "everyone else is doing it". I have a feeling those children that are born have to put up with a lot of shit because their parents might blame them for their unhappiness. I know this one woman, she's a director of a marketing company, this is her third time being pregnant (there is only an 5 to 8 month interval between each pregnancy- meaning her previous daughter was born 8 mos. and she's already 3 mos. pregnant, similar interval with first son). And I asked her if she would take a break from the work force to be with her children, she said hell no because her career was very important to her, she gets paid well and she can afford a nanny. I was like wtf I don't know your personal situation but your dad might have been forced to have children or may not have been ready. Either way, he should have known better, some parents don't know how much they screw their own children up when they make certain decisions.

I'm at a point in my life now where I say "screw it" to fitting in my own family. I don't want to be suffocated anymore. I'm learning to embrace my "difference" and so what if you don't fit it with them? Most likely we stick to our families because they are of the same blood, I call bullshit. I can't stand most of mine.

Thank you for responding. It's good to know that I'm not going nuts and that I'm not alone. If I can be of any help, i'd say always strive to be happy and don't let family get in the way. Who am I to give advice when I'm trying to figure myself out? lol Here's some positivity smile_kiss hfcheerblwkss
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 27500415
United States
12/29/2012 08:44 AM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Me to I spent a lot of years wishing my
real parents would pick me up.
Left home when I was 16 and never went
Back or had contact for 15 years.
I would love to know the term for this.

 Quoting: prodlikegod


Wow, that's a gutsy move. I can't imagine myself doing something like this, I wouldn't even know where to start. I've felt on many occasions though to just leave and not look back and I've felt like I'd do much better on my own.

I was looking for a term last night after someone mentioned it but haven't found anything yet...

Peace and love and thanks for responding.hfblwkss
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 27500415
United States
12/29/2012 08:49 AM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
No, but I've been embarrassed by my family so badly I wanted to find a new one.

When I was a kid, we all went to a nice Chinese restaurant for dinner one spring evening.

I was happily munching some sweet and sour shrimp when my step-father cut a small fart.

My mom proceeded to throw up all over the floor and then began yelling at him that he was gross.

I said "not nearly as gross as you puking all over the place" and I got up and moved to another table.

There ya have it.

:WTF098:
 Quoting: Soma/Comatose


Sorry to hear that mate, hope all is good with you hearts

And cute kitty? byekitty
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 27500415
United States
12/29/2012 08:55 AM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?

Yes, I am RH negative and neither one of my parents are. Don't know if that's significant, but I've never felt a part of my family. I was ignored and neglected my whole life...treated like I wasn't a part. My "mother" felt more like a nanny to me than a mother.

I don't look like anyone. I don't think like them. My mother is still alive and at 90 she STILL feels like a stranger to me...and I'm 54.

But if I don't belong to them, I don't know where I came from.

Hell...maybe I was hatched.
[/quote ]

Yes, I thought about parents neglecting their children because they might have not been ready for them. Or maybe you were adopted? I don't mean to throw that out there but if you feel so different maybe you are not from them. I doubt you were hatched cuz that'd be a pretty big egg...

Thank you for sharing your story and I hope you find what you're looking for. hugs
Hollow Bones

User ID: 3550534
United States
12/29/2012 08:57 AM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27500415


You chose to be born into your "family", it's not by some accident or coincidence. Your family members have many lessons and gifts for you, if you're paying attention that is. And the gifts don't always come in shiny wrappings.
To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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United States
12/29/2012 08:59 AM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Yeah, I do. But my glp family loves me...
 Quoting: TRIXER


Didn't mean to skip you, I just didn't see your reply. Your GLP family counts just as much, I 'm starting to believe family is what you make it. Accept love whenever given cuz it's a beautiful thing baby. ROCK ON.rockon
Hollow Bones

User ID: 3550534
United States
12/29/2012 08:59 AM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
No, but I've been embarrassed by my family so badly I wanted to find a new one.

When I was a kid, we all went to a nice Chinese restaurant for dinner one spring evening.

I was happily munching some sweet and sour shrimp when my step-father cut a small fart.

My mom proceeded to throw up all over the floor and then began yelling at him that he was gross.

I said "not nearly as gross as you puking all over the place" and I got up and moved to another table.

There ya have it.

WTF098
 Quoting: Soma/Comatose



How was the shrimp? Not too much breading I hope.
To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 27500415
United States
12/29/2012 09:17 AM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27500415


You chose to be born into your "family", it's not by some accident or coincidence. Your family members have many lessons and gifts for you, if you're paying attention that is. And the gifts don't always come in shiny wrappings.
 Quoting: Hollow Bones


I'd love to believe that and I used to think about it but maybe I "chose" wrong because on both sides of the family, it's chaos. I was looking for those lessons and gifts, I think I figured one very important lesson and found one big gift but I'm not seeing anything else. sad
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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United States
12/29/2012 10:26 AM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
bump
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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12/29/2012 12:49 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
bump
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31088592
Australia
12/29/2012 01:06 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Mix up at hospital? But as your family have clothed, fed, roof over your head and got you this far I'd not worry about it. Believe me finding money for housing and food is hard...

decide where you want to be in 5 years, make a plan, start at step 1, and keep going. Revise plan when you see a quicker route or hit obstacles. Once you have this you'll care much less where you are from an care a whole lot more where you are going.
 Quoting: Mixer 1449133




This
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 27500415
United States
12/29/2012 08:34 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
You all want to know the weird thing about GLP? How come most of the threads that I start usually die within a couple of days with 2 pages of replies if I'm lucky? I'm not here to waste anyone's time, so when I post a topic, I always hope it's a worthwhile topic for a lot of people and I'd get good feedback. I started this thread because my original question was something that's been bothering me for the longest time and I just kept getting a nagging feeling that I should talk about, research it, find a solution etc... My question sounds crazy, I know, but I'm only asking because I'm going through an identity crisis and I only want to better myself. I know GLP is not the place to ask for help but I hope to get feedback, ideas, and tips from other people because surely I can make myself better before seeking any type of professional advice. My ultimate question, how come when people talk about real, serious issues, people don't care, yet somebody starts talking about The Nobody which a possible non-existant existing being (oxymoron much?), and it gets 10 pages of replies?? Am I missing something?wtf
I'm gonna bump this a couple more times, and see where it goes, after that I'm done. To ALL that responded, thank you for hearing me out and thank you for sharing.

*hoping to get more feedback, fingers crossed *
Soma/Comatose
If you can’t convince them, confuse them.

User ID: 997239
United States
12/29/2012 09:03 PM

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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
You all want to know the weird thing about GLP? How come most of the threads that I start usually die within a couple of days with 2 pages of replies if I'm lucky? I'm not here to waste anyone's time, so when I post a topic, I always hope it's a worthwhile topic for a lot of people and I'd get good feedback. I started this thread because my original question was something that's been bothering me for the longest time and I just kept getting a nagging feeling that I should talk about, research it, find a solution etc... My question sounds crazy, I know, but I'm only asking because I'm going through an identity crisis and I only want to better myself. I know GLP is not the place to ask for help but I hope to get feedback, ideas, and tips from other people because surely I can make myself better before seeking any type of professional advice. My ultimate question, how come when people talk about real, serious issues, people don't care, yet somebody starts talking about The Nobody which a possible non-existant existing being (oxymoron much?), and it gets 10 pages of replies?? Am I missing something?wtf
I'm gonna bump this a couple more times, and see where it goes, after that I'm done. To ALL that responded, thank you for hearing me out and thank you for sharing.

*hoping to get more feedback, fingers crossed *
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27500415


Well, I for one enjoyed your thread, but I'm a pretty weird guy so I can't speak for "normal" people.

I always try to look for some humor in things, even if I am completely sarcastic about it.

I would suggest you become a paid member so that you have more resources available to you.

Keep it up and don't let them get you down!!

Peace!

homeplanetkat

Last Edited by Mister Shadow on 12/29/2012 09:06 PM
Soma/Comatose
If you can’t convince them, confuse them.

User ID: 997239
United States
12/29/2012 09:05 PM

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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
No, but I've been embarrassed by my family so badly I wanted to find a new one.

When I was a kid, we all went to a nice Chinese restaurant for dinner one spring evening.

I was happily munching some sweet and sour shrimp when my step-father cut a small fart.

My mom proceeded to throw up all over the floor and then began yelling at him that he was gross.

I said "not nearly as gross as you puking all over the place" and I got up and moved to another table.

There ya have it.

WTF098
 Quoting: Soma/Comatose



How was the shrimp? Not too much breading I hope.
 Quoting: Hollow Bones


Actually, the shrimp was impeccable as it always was at that restaurant. I was sad when they closed, I really loved their Peking Duck as well.

Thanks for asking.

manwave45
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 27500415
United States
12/30/2012 08:27 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
You all want to know the weird thing about GLP? How come most of the threads that I start usually die within a couple of days with 2 pages of replies if I'm lucky? I'm not here to waste anyone's time, so when I post a topic, I always hope it's a worthwhile topic for a lot of people and I'd get good feedback. I started this thread because my original question was something that's been bothering me for the longest time and I just kept getting a nagging feeling that I should talk about, research it, find a solution etc... My question sounds crazy, I know, but I'm only asking because I'm going through an identity crisis and I only want to better myself. I know GLP is not the place to ask for help but I hope to get feedback, ideas, and tips from other people because surely I can make myself better before seeking any type of professional advice. My ultimate question, how come when people talk about real, serious issues, people don't care, yet somebody starts talking about The Nobody which a possible non-existant existing being (oxymoron much?), and it gets 10 pages of replies?? Am I missing something?wtf
I'm gonna bump this a couple more times, and see where it goes, after that I'm done. To ALL that responded, thank you for hearing me out and thank you for sharing.

*hoping to get more feedback, fingers crossed *
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27500415


Well, I for one enjoyed your thread, but I'm a pretty weird guy so I can't speak for "normal" people.

I always try to look for some humor in things, even if I am completely sarcastic about it.

I would suggest you become a paid member so that you have more resources available to you.

Keep it up and don't let them get you down!!

Peace!

:homeplanetkat:
 Quoting: Soma/Comatose


Thank you for the love and advice. You're a cool guy/woman. A sense of humor has gotten through many things in my life as well and it's so important but a lot of people take humor for granted *sigh*. Oh well, I wish you happiness and luck. Happy New year!peacesmile_hearneener
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31143629
United States
12/30/2012 08:34 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Yes. God is not competent.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 27500415
United States
12/30/2012 08:52 PM
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Re: Anyone ever feels like they were born in the wrong family?
Yes. God is not competent.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31143629


Wait...what? Is this a joke? are you being sarcastic or...?

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