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I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver

 
Don'tBeAfraid
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User ID: 1110734
United States
01/03/2013 09:56 PM

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I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver

I'm not angry with him anymore. Time hasn't dimmed my anger for what happened, but I no longer hate him.

He'd been drinking that Summer night. Who knows why? Maybe he was celebrating a new job, or the birth of a child. Maybe he was really sad and busted up. I don't know why he'd kept drinking long past the point of normality.

He was so intoxicated that he driving the wrong way down the opposite side of a highway. He must have been completely in a stupor.

Maybe he wasn't a bad guy. He died in the crash too. We will never know.

I do know who you were. Bright as the Sun. Innocence incarnate. You were perpetual joy to my gloominess and doubt. Self-assured, but never boastful. Tender and strong and passionate. Forgiving in a way that emulated Christ. Kind to everyone. I'd never heard a single voice that had criticized you. No one could bear to, you were such a delight to be around. We were warmed by your fire and spirit.

Maybe he had friends too. Maybe they kept buying rounds that night to celebrate with him. When a party gets going, no one want to be the wet blanket and snuff it out.

They snuffed out your life that night. All the promise that was inside you. Your gentle dreams and desires. The good work that you might have done. Everything that was inside you, extinguished.

Had one person taken away his keys, refused to serve him another drink, called him a cab, drove him home, a million ways to stop him, but no one wanted to say no...enough...stop...

So you're dead and I'm still here, but I've felt some part of me was dead since that night when everything should have been celebration and passing milestones and Hope.

There were people who were supposed to love you. People who had cared for you all of your life. Maybe you were supposed to marry one of them. Had children and watched them grow up.

You'd be 50 now, and probably a grandmother. I bet you'd still be as beautiful and inspire me.

I don't have to close my eyes to imagine you. I've thought of you every day. You were perfect and the standard by which all others are measured.

I hope I get to see you again. That's my idea of Heaven.

You'll be easy to find. I'll look for the brightest light there, and keep walking until I can look into your eyes again.

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/04/2013 12:58 AM
Anonymous Coward
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01/03/2013 10:12 PM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
Lots of love to you...I can not imagine but my thoughts are with you and the one you lost. lots of love and hugs
Don'tBeAfraid (OP)

User ID: 1110734
United States
01/03/2013 11:11 PM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
Lots of love to you...I can not imagine but my thoughts are with you and the one you lost. lots of love and hugs
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31033911


Thank you. I am inconsolable tonight. The wound shall never heal.
Vic-chick13

User ID: 1311834
Canada
01/03/2013 11:17 PM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
My thoughts and prayers are with you. Much love.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27667120
01/03/2013 11:22 PM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
I feel for you, I really do. Most of us know where you are coming from as well so you are not alone. All I can suggest is that they would want you to be happy and not to ruin your life on their account, they would not want that. be patient, you will meet up soon enough.

Life is but a dream.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27665747
United States
01/03/2013 11:31 PM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
I feel for you, I really do. Most of us know where you are coming from as well so you are not alone. All I can suggest is that they would want you to be happy and not to ruin your life on their account, they would not want that. be patient, you will meet up soon enough.

Life is but a dream.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27667120


i would do anything to go back in time just to see the person i love one more time.Kiss her,hear her voice and just look at her pretty eyes but sadly it cant never happen.
imetthecreator

User ID: 1963503
United States
01/03/2013 11:39 PM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
my deepest and sincerest condolences to
you op.

may the father be with you and your loved ones
To the %99
Be glad you still are asleep and dream
awakening and knowing is the real nightmare
Dr. AculaModerator
Forum Moderator

User ID: 272140
United States
01/03/2013 11:50 PM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
Sorry for ur loss

hug

to ______ may they live on in your thoughts and memories... and now the servers of GLP :)

Last Edited by Dr. Acula on 01/03/2013 11:51 PM
Don'tBeAfraid (OP)

User ID: 1110734
United States
01/04/2013 12:45 AM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
There are worst things than Death.
To see someone you love die before you,
And live on each moment
Considering what might have been,
The eternal 24 hours leading up to their birthday.
The times you wake up and then remember they are gone.
Countless anniversaries:
Not the ones you think I'm talking about,
But the little ones...the remembrance that a year has passed
Since the warmth of their hand was enfolded within yours
That 5 years have passed since that quiet Autumn night
When she placed her head on your shoulder for the first time.
That you imagine this year you might have seen the smallest crease
In the corner of her twinkling eyes.
The same ones that could merely narrow
And made you feel powerless to resist,
And powerful as a Man.
That you've calculated the minutes that you were with her,
And now she's been absent longer that that span of intimacy.
The nightly horror that there's a space next to you
And it won't ever be creased
By the gravity of her love.
That all of life is a ruin.
A wasteland
Shadows

There are people who worry about survival
And I'm trying to breathe again
Take...one...full...breath
That doesn't ache.
Forget for one full moment
That she's gone.
They complain about nonsense
The most miniscule minutia
While I would give all that I possess
For a moment when she was sleeping
To hear a singular soft sigh.
A fluttering of her eyelids.
The priceless treasure of my whispered name.
An instant of joy.
To see only the sunlight reflected in her tresses.
Or the wind to flicker across her hair
And make it dance.

All of the sunlight is eternally dimmed.
The cheerfulness of birds made somber and distant.
That life is a prison.
Eternal waiting
Waiting
Waiting some more.
Filling up time with activities
Distractions
So you can forget
Make it go away.
And it won't.

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/04/2013 12:46 AM
ladulce

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01/04/2013 12:56 AM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
Your sentiments are beautiful and well stated. I have lost 2 of those that I loved to drunk drivers as well.

I send you hugs. May you be blessed.
Don'tBeAfraid (OP)

User ID: 1110734
United States
01/05/2013 03:32 AM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
There are infinite universes
Where you are still alive.
You delayed your trip for a moment.
The light turned red instead of green.
You forgot your keys and had to go back.
You said one more sentence on the phone to me
And so you are still breathing today.

In those places the one who interrupted our journey together
Is also still alive.
He stayed for one more round.
He fell asleep in a parking lot.
He spent the night on a friend's couch.
A designated driver took him home.
Those brothers of his,
Those copies didn't kill you.

You're happy and fulfilled in those universes.
Aging gracefully.
Singing in a choir.
Cooking dinner.
Smiling and without a care.

He is too perhaps.

Infinite versions of you.
Me too.

It's the only thing that keeps me going in my abject loneliness.

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/05/2013 03:33 AM
Albanian
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Canada
01/05/2013 03:40 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
May God the most high have a special place for your loved one and may the day come where you are reunited in heaven with laughter and joy :)
Don'tBeAfraid (OP)

User ID: 1110734
United States
01/05/2013 04:41 AM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
Sometimes I'd walk up
You were busy doing something
I'd watch your delicate hands,
The intensity in your eyes,
The way you bit your lip
Concentrating on the task at hand.
Then you'd look up at me
And the rest of the world was instantly gone.
There was just a channel,
A connection between us.

I pushed you in a swing once...
They say that an object in motion...
Stays in motion.
It never stops moving.
Continuing to glide in infinitesimally smaller arcs.
Is the swing still moving from you being inside of it?

If you touched something
You added the heat from your hand
Gave warmth to it.
Is some aspect of you still here?

I still remember you.
Is it because your presence never left?
Is it because I can't forget?
Am I insane with grief?

All these grieving people...
...because someone couldn't go home and drink there.

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/05/2013 05:39 AM
Anonymous Coward
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01/05/2013 04:52 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
Sorry for your loss OP.
I too lost a beloved son to a drunk driver. The longing for them never goes away.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
01/05/2013 05:46 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
That was beautifully put OP. Sorry for your pain.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31501064
Germany
01/05/2013 06:58 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
I know how you feel, OP.

Don't you just hate it how the physical universe works. We're souls incarcerated in a prison that makes our loved ones and us suffer. Inevitably. We're the laughing stock of a malevolent, sadistic "god". I absolutely hate and despise the inventor of this universe for that. This shit has to stop.
Anonymous Coward
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New Zealand
01/05/2013 07:04 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
bsflag
Apocalypse Girl

User ID: 27951003
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01/05/2013 07:06 AM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
Sometimes I'd walk up
You were busy doing something
I'd watch your delicate hands,
The intensity in your eyes,
The way you bit your lip
Concentrating on the task at hand.
Then you'd look up at me
And the rest of the world was instantly gone.
There was just a channel,
A connection between us.

I pushed you in a swing once...
They say that an object in motion...
Stays in motion.
It never stops moving.
Continuing to glide in infinitesimally smaller arcs.
Is the swing still moving from you being inside of it?

If you touched something
You added the heat from your hand
Gave warmth to it.
Is some aspect of you still here?

I still remember you.
Is it because your presence never left?
Is it because I can't forget?
Am I insane with grief?

All these grieving people...
...because someone couldn't go home and drink there.
 Quoting: Don'tBeAfraid



sending a hug your way ...
so hard to lose the ones we love
Apocalypse ( "lifting of the veil" or "revelation") is a disclosure of something hidden from the majority of mankind in an era dominated by falsehood and misconception, i.e. the veil to be lifted.
* know the truth and the truth will set you free
Blue Skies

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01/05/2013 07:07 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
kks104
:kitten on fence:
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31501064
Germany
01/05/2013 07:12 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
bsflag
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 16738867


Wait until you're 40 years older than 7.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 16738867
New Zealand
01/05/2013 07:14 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
bsflag
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 16738867


Wait until you're 40 years older than 7.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31501064


Read the Original post again.

With an open mind.

Then get back to ne.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 16738867
New Zealand
01/05/2013 07:14 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
edit - 'me'
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31501064
Germany
01/05/2013 07:42 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
bsflag
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 16738867


Wait until you're 40 years older than 7.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31501064


Read the Original post again.

With an open mind.

Then get back to ne.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 16738867

Someone mourning the loss of his or her daughter. Why the B.S. flag because of that?
Goofy for God
Do everything with love

User ID: 16845676
United States
01/05/2013 07:55 AM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
Sorry for your lose, this song is about a women who lost her daughter to a drunk driver and how she handled it, she set him free and the travel together and speak at schools.



Proverbs 15:1
A soft answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger.
Lies & Alibis

User ID: 26237455
United States
01/05/2013 08:23 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
OP, your sorrow touches my soul...sad, and beautiful, and full of grace. Bringing you peace, joy, compassion, mercy, and strength, and a song for you:



When my world is shaking, heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave your hands

hf
BOWMAN

User ID: 11265661
United States
01/05/2013 08:28 AM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
rose


------
schiehallion

User ID: 31546378
United Kingdom
01/05/2013 08:33 AM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
found this site this week, after a tough day at work, management invited me to explain my part in stuff that went wrong.. even though things wouldn't have went wrong if concerns raised had been listened to before the events.

all of that is nothing, totally unimportant as I read your words.

[link to www.webofloneliness.com]

hf
scottish, british, european but first of all Human. Even this is not true. I am Spirit appearing to be solid, just like all life everywhere
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31546691
United States
01/05/2013 08:42 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
WOW YOU SOUND LIKE A LAME ASS.There is nothing wrong w/having a few beers and driving . Wasn't long ago it was legal to drink and drive .So f u and get you one one 4 the road .What a fag pussies like u r ruining America Thanks for being u
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31546691
United States
01/05/2013 08:45 AM
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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
I am so sorry I did not read the whole post please forgive me for what i said.
2012Portal
2012Portal - The Mayan Calendar

User ID: 15022013
Netherlands
01/05/2013 08:49 AM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
Wow, that broke my heart.

God bless you OP, take care.

Double-Rainbow
Mayan Calendar and 2012-
From the love of power to the power of Love -
[link to 2012portal.myfeedportal.com]
Don'tBeAfraid (OP)

User ID: 1110734
United States
01/05/2013 08:54 AM

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Re: I miss you ____ you'd be 50 now if not for a drunk driver
found this site this week, after a tough day at work, management invited me to explain my part in stuff that went wrong.. even though things wouldn't have went wrong if concerns raised had been listened to before the events.

all of that is nothing, totally unimportant as I read your words.

[link to www.webofloneliness.com]

hf
 Quoting: schiehallion


Thank you. I hope your own work issue works out. Things are very tough all over with a globally fragile economy and the potential loss of employment is always terrible.

You are all (well most of you), very kind and considerate.

Drunk driving is a correctable behavior that hurts both the perpetrator and the victims who are maimed, harmed, or killed. People get angry about those who commit the crime, but I actually feel sorry for them.

It's very easy to drink too much. Because of that, I have often volunteered to be a designated driver. Only one person needs to take care of their friends so everyone gets home safe.

The numbers have fallen quite a bit since she died. She was goodness itself, not like me, someone rare. About 1.5 million people in the USA are arrested each year, and miraculously they only maim 200 thousand or so and kill the equivalent of a small rural town of people each year (17,000).

The issue is not drinking or alcoholism. It's publicly drinking too much with careless disregard for the safety of themselves or others then operating a vehicle.

Last Edited by Don'tBeAfraid on 01/05/2013 09:04 AM

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