I go to bed at night and dont want to wake up

As I said I can't imagine all the positive things US can offer. If you're really tired you can travel to Hawaii for example AND still stay in your country. I believe it's an amazing thing and I'm so jealous, hehe.

US is just too great and full of opportunities to get bored, at least you can move to a better climate inside your mighty country. OP, pull yourself together because millions of people from Bangladesh want to swap with you! lol

:facepalm12:

When 'help' comes in the form of serious, close-minded judgement/accussation and without even the slightest attempt to ask questions to get to know the person being judged, then 'irritation' is warranted. The sad truth is if OP had said he drank wine occassionally or that he was taking antidepressants, none of you self-proclaimed 'Demonologists' would have chimed in and said shit about him having 'demons' - but that's just a testament to your social programming and lack of awareness. Can't say I'm surprised to see that you operate just like the government does - create the problem (demons), supply the solution (Jesus). You'd don't actually care about the person you're judging and trying to scare into accepting your dogma, as you just trying to seize an opportunity to tell a complete stranger that you know exactly what's right for him so you can bolster and reaffirm your own belief system in the process. A practice that is void of consideration & respect. I say that because if you actually cared about the person you were speaking to you wouldn't dare lob such an ignorant accusation at an individual for simply acting 'irritated' for being unfairly judged - and you'd actually would have made a sincere effort to ask questions and get to know the person you're allegedly trying to 'help'.

If you can't be sensible enough to figure out how to extend SUPPORT & wisdom to individuals without demonstrating a complete disregard for their existing personal/spiritual beliefs and without informing them that they will need to adhere to your own instead, then you will clearly demonstrate that you're not qualified to be helping in the first place. Choose wisely.

But your country arguably has the most beautiful ladies...well next to Finland!

Know what you mean OP.
I dont have the same routine as you but it gets old repeating the same thing daily.
I sat and pondered what exactly it is that is missing and I concluded that it is love and compassion among people.No one cares about any one else.Its a dog eat dog world.If you have family in many cases they dont care about you unless they need something from you and the almighty dollar rules most.

If you have a purpose it makes life worthwhile and if people dont care about one another all the purpose disappears.I realize many people run on greed but many use to run on love and compassion which is almost gone for the majority...and the ones of us that still have that cant or are afraid to show it for fear of being taken advantage of or hurt or worse.

This is the source of your problem. The mind altering drugs invite in the demons. Canabis destroys your drive and in fact causes depression, schizophrenia and demon possession. Altered states = witchcraft, which is communion with demons.

That is why the Bible condemns this activity. Your solution is simple. Drop the dope, take up Christ and stop living for yourself. The joy of the Lord is not far behind.

It is koyaanisqatsi, a Hopi word meaning "a state of life that calls for another way of living; world out of balance." Why do I tell you this? Because you are not alone. A lot of people that I know have expressed the same feelings. What's the purpose of anything when you are already bought and sold?

You're 20 years young. Get out of the house, apartment...whatever you live in. Go somewhere, anywhere...museum, library or park. Then find a comfortable place to sit, relax yourself, and just look around...see what, and who, is there. Have dreams, visions, fantasies...whatever keeps the other place at bay, for awhile. Continue to accomplish this.

To balance what is happening to us, we need to find change within ourselves, to create any kind of content in the domain which we find ourselves. It is the spirit inside of us that needs, if not rekindling, at least an extra spark to get it fired back up.

You have many choices ahead of you. Do what YOU want to do. Take your time to decide, then DO IT. Light the spark and it lead you into light.

Don't carry a burden too heavy to be yours. Human Beings aren't designed for that. A purpose will be shown to us all, hopefully soon.

As the Hopi say, 'Open the hole in the top of your head'. Imagine it, ask for spiritual guidance and see what happens.

You take care,

the fish

The bible is in English too.

I can tell you have demons because you became so irritated at the man trying to help you. Marijuana opens doors to demons even if it feels good.

If you ever want peace you know where to find it. Call on Jesus from the heart.

I don't mean to be cause for alarm.

I just have this deep emotional pain.

That which makes me ache. I have constant anxiety. I feel the weight of the world in my heart and soul. It's no longer depression as much as it is a longing for a better time.

You see ill get down to the details.

Every day I wake up to a blinding sun, always before the alarm. To the morning guidance of either work or maintenance of material goods, neither of which feel right to me. I step on the same floor. Shower in the same bathroom with the same cleaning supplies. Put on the same clothes. Eat the same bland food. Brush my teeth with the same poison, the same brush. Lock the same door. Start the same, miraculously still working car. Drive to the extent of 3 miles, to and from the same box. Sell the same material shit, and get the same treatment of shit. Make the same terrible pay, or less. Go home and eat. Feel the pain of another day... Repeat.

Now i know glp isn't the place to go for a pity party. That's not what I'm getting at.

Thing is I'm a 20 year old American and this life I'm sure is similar to many of you.

I had it all going for me. An honors diploma, scholarship to a good school, independence, and many more years.

Then I started to live. To actually live. I took up cannabis and it helped me to realize that we are living a play. That even though we may call others sheep and ourselves awake, we are all being suppressed.

I had a massive explosion of self discovery rarely even found in those twice my age. I started to see how docile everything and everyone was becoming.

I started to think about how much we could do but dont. How I'm working a job to hold up a shitty corporation, even though pay is falling with quality of living and they treat me like trash. How the school I was attending was a brainwashing ponzy scheme to get a "degree." A literal label for yourself to do, what else, join the workforce. How tv, facebook, texting not talking, hate, ignorance, greed, compliance... Its what everyone is used to, and we do NOTHING about it.

They say vote. Yeah, bullshit nice try. Why vote? I'm too stupid to know about politics, right? And its a number game in the guise of a popularity contest, which should be bad enough. After all the media seems to comfortably know the outcome of everything. Ill just let them make the decisions.

That's how people are beginning to think.

My sister said it best:

"Its money. Its the banks. Its a power scheme that worked. The bills are a measure of power. You start at the bottom. To get to the top you have to live a life of deceit. If EVERYONE woke up to this... If EVERYONE marched on the capitals of the world and burned these bills and got rid of the idea of power, we could live. That's when humanity truly becomes free again."

Couldn't agree more.

Now ill go to sleep and continue this madness. But I feel as if even god is telling me its time. I can feel it in every bit of my energy. I've been put here for a reason, even if its just for my soul to endure hell.

Night yall!

OP the 'old' and unsustainable thought forms & systems of our past are continuing to crumble and fade away. You are aware of this already and ahead of the curve. The physical world has been slow to reflect the changing nature of the collective consciousness of humanity. Without question it is a challenge to find a balance when your awareness finds itself in one realm but your physical body remains subjected to and lies in another. Many individuals are struggling with this so don't feel isolated or alone in having those feelings. Hang in there and just do your best to secure some degree of balance and calmness within and hold onto it - that's all you can ask of yourself right now. Try to master these emotions that bring you down, as you ultimately have control over 'how' and 'when' you decide to honor & experience them....

It is difficult to find reasons to be positive about enduring through these uncertain times in the context in which you find yourself, but you can take some comfort in knowing that you have explored this difficult path of self-realization in advance of many others. In that respect, when things speed up and the bulk of humanity is forced to quickly come to grips with the destruction of the illusion that our society has created, you have prepared yourself and will be in a position to serve as an vital source of strength and support (should you choose to extend it) to those in your life who were caught off-guard and will be deeply struggling with the changing conditions.

"It is no measure of health to be well adjusted to a profoundly sick society"

:greenkarma:

I would like to add you to my buddy list, and continue this line of thought either within this thread or via p.m.
as I have felt this way since I am a youth as well.


You seem very bright, probably genius I.Q., which is why you do not feel as if you "fit in." You don't. Most people are low I.Q. docile sheep. They don't want anything disrupting their lives- for most American men: football season, basketball, then baseball season. Watch 6 hours tv per day, fast food, maxim magazine, top 40 radio, oogling bimbos.

Women, not much different, just swap out sports for fashion and shopping.


This current American paradigm is ugly and awful, and it will end, and soon.


Be good, brother EyeDR3!

it's a mad world,the dreams in which i'm dying are the best i've ever had....the song helps me feel,not the only one

I believe a little self medicating is good. An 8 to 5 is hard on the body and soul. It really is inhumane that we have to work this hard to survive. I don't know how the farmers do it. Damn, that's a hard life, to raise everything on your own. I think I'd rather be a hunter, mostly. Good luck and it might be you need some beauty rest. love.....Mom

Watch Honey Boo Boo and you'll realize how fortunate you are AND you'll might actually laugh at their antics.

If that doesn't work, move to Georgia where they really don't give a sh*t what others think of them or their lifestyles.

When TSHTF, it'll probably be the rednecks and hillbillies that will survive. Hell, they've been doing it for eons.

Oh, wait...I hear banjos...damn...