Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates | |
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Anonymous Cowherder Stop the inanity! User ID: 28230270 United States 01/23/2013 02:17 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Re: Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates bath salts strike again! Repeal the 17th Amendment and the Reapportionment Act of 1929! Thread: First steps down the road to a return to the Constitutional Republic that we were intended to be. Restore the Republic. Thread: The Bill of Rights does NOT include age requirements! It's a flower, not something to be feared. - Moo! |
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Anonymous Coward User ID: 32850016 United States 01/23/2013 02:37 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Re: Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates Quoting: Got Damn! 32851282 Jordan Sargent It's never a dull day in Florida, our country's most fantastic state. Let's set the scene: It's Monday, January 21, and an unnamed North Fort Myers resident is lying in bed relaxing after a hard day's work. Just after 7 p.m., he hears a noise coming from his roof — he thinks it sounds like thunder. He goes outside to investigate the disturbance, when he sees 21-year-old Gregory Matthew Bruni running on his house. Bruni leaps from the roof, tackling the man. Bruni is naked. From there, Bruni runs into the house, hellbent on destruction. He sees a "large television" minding its own business and knocks it off its stand. He then spies a vacuum cleaner. How do you terrorize a vacuum cleaner? You don't — you just empty its contents back onto the floor. That's what Bruni does. From there, things finally start to get weird: Bruni then headed toward the couple's son's bedroom, where several guns were stored, so the man's wife fired three warning shots from a .38 revolver. The arrest report says Bruni fell to the floor - but then began pleasuring himself. He got up off the floor, ran into the son's bedroom and began rubbing clothing on his face. Police are called, and they apprehend a flailing, babbling Bruni only after Tasering him. "Tase him, bro," a cop almost certainly says. Bruni is taken to a hospital, but doctors there say they can't identify what drug he is on. The answer is either all of them, or one you've never heard of. Or bath salts. Probably bath salts. Police charge Bruni with two counts of criminal mischief, battery, occupied burglary and resisting arrest without violence. Everyone else in Florida goes to sleep that night, awaiting their turn. [link to gawker.com] I will guarantee you one thing... The perp is a liberal. |
Mel Gibson (OP) User ID: 32851282 United States 01/23/2013 02:45 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Re: Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates Quoting: Got Damn! 32851282 Jordan Sargent It's never a dull day in Florida, our country's most fantastic state. Let's set the scene: It's Monday, January 21, and an unnamed North Fort Myers resident is lying in bed relaxing after a hard day's work. Just after 7 p.m., he hears a noise coming from his roof — he thinks it sounds like thunder. He goes outside to investigate the disturbance, when he sees 21-year-old Gregory Matthew Bruni running on his house. Bruni leaps from the roof, tackling the man. Bruni is naked. From there, Bruni runs into the house, hellbent on destruction. He sees a "large television" minding its own business and knocks it off its stand. He then spies a vacuum cleaner. How do you terrorize a vacuum cleaner? You don't — you just empty its contents back onto the floor. That's what Bruni does. From there, things finally start to get weird: Bruni then headed toward the couple's son's bedroom, where several guns were stored, so the man's wife fired three warning shots from a .38 revolver. The arrest report says Bruni fell to the floor - but then began pleasuring himself. He got up off the floor, ran into the son's bedroom and began rubbing clothing on his face. Police are called, and they apprehend a flailing, babbling Bruni only after Tasering him. "Tase him, bro," a cop almost certainly says. Bruni is taken to a hospital, but doctors there say they can't identify what drug he is on. The answer is either all of them, or one you've never heard of. Or bath salts. Probably bath salts. Police charge Bruni with two counts of criminal mischief, battery, occupied burglary and resisting arrest without violence. Everyone else in Florida goes to sleep that night, awaiting their turn. [link to gawker.com] I will guarantee you one thing... The perp is a liberal. It was you! How else wouldja' know???? |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 32797374 United States 01/23/2013 02:51 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 14093935 United States 01/23/2013 02:58 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Re: Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates milleniums from now, when ancient archeologists come to earth to try and piece together what happened during our decline and ultimate unravelling as a species, I hope they find this article. |
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Anonymous Coward User ID: 17687147 United States 01/23/2013 05:34 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Re: Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates Quoting: Got Damn! 32851282 Jordan Sargent It's never a dull day in Florida, our country's most fantastic state. Let's set the scene: It's Monday, January 21, and an unnamed North Fort Myers resident is lying in bed relaxing after a hard day's work. Just after 7 p.m., he hears a noise coming from his roof — he thinks it sounds like thunder. He goes outside to investigate the disturbance, when he sees 21-year-old Gregory Matthew Bruni running on his house. Bruni leaps from the roof, tackling the man. Bruni is naked. From there, Bruni runs into the house, hellbent on destruction. He sees a "large television" minding its own business and knocks it off its stand. He then spies a vacuum cleaner. How do you terrorize a vacuum cleaner? You don't — you just empty its contents back onto the floor. That's what Bruni does. From there, things finally start to get weird: Bruni then headed toward the couple's son's bedroom, where several guns were stored, so the man's wife fired three warning shots from a .38 revolver. The arrest report says Bruni fell to the floor - but then began pleasuring himself. He got up off the floor, ran into the son's bedroom and began rubbing clothing on his face. Police are called, and they apprehend a flailing, babbling Bruni only after Tasering him. "Tase him, bro," a cop almost certainly says. Bruni is taken to a hospital, but doctors there say they can't identify what drug he is on. The answer is either all of them, or one you've never heard of. Or bath salts. Probably bath salts. Police charge Bruni with two counts of criminal mischief, battery, occupied burglary and resisting arrest without violence. Everyone else in Florida goes to sleep that night, awaiting their turn. [link to gawker.com] really????????????? |
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PIR User ID: 26687891 United States 01/23/2013 07:53 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Re: Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates milleniums from now, when ancient archeologists come to earth to try and piece together what happened during our decline and ultimate unravelling as a species, I hope they find this article. Quoting: Anonymous Coward 14093935 This. We should erect the "Georgia Tard Stones" and etch this stuff in stone so they see the fall of the last great Tards and maybe prevent future Tard nations. Last Edited by PIR on 01/23/2013 07:54 AM |
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Here for the moment User ID: 14554879 United States 01/23/2013 09:59 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Re: Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates Quoting: Got Damn! 32851282 Jordan Sargent It's never a dull day in Florida, our country's most fantastic state. Let's set the scene: It's Monday, January 21, and an unnamed North Fort Myers resident is lying in bed relaxing after a hard day's work. Just after 7 p.m., he hears a noise coming from his roof — he thinks it sounds like thunder. He goes outside to investigate the disturbance, when he sees 21-year-old Gregory Matthew Bruni running on his house. Bruni leaps from the roof, tackling the man. Bruni is naked. More at link [link to gawker.com] The modern day pranksters! Or, was it methamphetamine? |
BRIEF User ID: 381742 United States 01/23/2013 10:00 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Re: Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates Yup "doctors there say they can't identify what drug he is on. The answer is either all of them, or one you've never heard of. Or bath salts. Probably bath salts" I never forgive and I never forget I am a licensed firearm holder. I will, under protection of law, use lethal force if attacked. |
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arbrefeu User ID: 20523885 United States 01/23/2013 10:13 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Re: Naked Florida Man Jumps Off Roof Onto Homeowner, Knocks Television Over, Empties Vacuum Cleaner, Masturbates he was 'told' to do it to distract. scopalamine. gooooood morrrnin GLP oh yeah scopalamine or BS must be great. last nite on a repeat of house the pt ran out on 10mg iv haldol then was tased repeatedly... turned out to be rabies. i mean scopalamine. it just sounds beautiful. |