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This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....

 
Swank Johnson
User ID: 33262906
United States
01/30/2013 08:42 AM
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This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
I'm laying there by the pool and I see that there are some fine looking ladies around. I needed a way to get their attention so I went through all the pool filters and scooped out the dead floating bees and wasps.

I laid back down on my lounge chair and place the dead insects all over my body. I played it calm and cool and figured that the girls would look over and see that I was a tough guy laying there with bees and wasps on me and I wasn't even scared or nothing!

That's a way to attract girls at the pool.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 24170033
Netherlands
01/30/2013 08:45 AM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
so basicly , adorn yourself with insect corpses?

well if it works for you all the best to it
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 33260404
Germany
01/30/2013 08:46 AM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
Or you could ride a 100-foot wave and drown in vagina... tounge

Anonymous Coward
User ID: 22373790
United States
01/30/2013 08:47 AM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
Shit, GLP is making me cry with laughter this morning.

Thanks guys. hf
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 33262906
United States
01/30/2013 06:03 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
bump
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 33349264
United States
01/30/2013 06:13 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
while working Vegas,
Tom Jones use to stuff his
tight jumpsuit with a huge
sock in his underwear.

the ladies in the audience would
stare at his crotch the entire
show just dreaming about that bulge.

lil did they know it was just a sock

hahahaha
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 22179930
United States
01/30/2013 06:24 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
I put a potato in my swim trunks
milehighmike

User ID: 339344
United States
01/30/2013 06:33 PM

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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
I put a potato in my swim trunks
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 22179930


Front or back Cletus????


lmao
"Successful people are always looking for opportunities to help others. Unsuccessful people are always asking, 'What's in it for me?'" — Brian Tracy: Personal and business training author, speaker, and consultant

"We are all, right now, living the life we choose." -- Peter McWilliams, Author

"The bad news is time flies. The good news is you're the pilot." -- Michael Altshuler
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 33349264
United States
01/30/2013 06:35 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
while working Vegas,
Tom Jones use to stuff his
tight jumpsuit with a huge
sock in his underwear.

the ladies in the audience would
stare at his crotch the entire
show just dreaming about that bulge.

lil did they know it was just a sock

hahahaha
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33349264


here's a pic of that sock
hahahaha

[link to 1.bp.blogspot.com]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 33349264
United States
01/30/2013 06:38 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
while working Vegas,
Tom Jones use to stuff his
tight jumpsuit with a huge
sock in his underwear.

the ladies in the audience would
stare at his crotch the entire
show just dreaming about that bulge.

lil did they know it was just a sock

hahahaha
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33349264


here's a pic of that sock
hahahaha

[link to 1.bp.blogspot.com]
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33349264


another sock pic

[link to lizybee.files.wordpress.com]

5a

hey babe, that's sho biz.
get'm wet and send'em home.
they buy more records ;)
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 957129
United States
01/30/2013 06:41 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
Stupid 'lil boys who still wish they had big penises. Sorry guys, you got small peepees. If you don't know how to use what you got, then expect to live alone and keep jerking off to porn 4 ever!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 21712215
Canada
01/30/2013 06:49 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
Stupid 'lil boys who still wish they had big penises. Sorry guys, you got small peepees. If you don't know how to use what you got, then expect to live alone and keep jerking off to porn 4 ever!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 957129


Jerking to porn is less dangerous and cheaper
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 33342694
United States
01/30/2013 06:53 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
Stupid 'lil boys who still wish they had big penises. Sorry guys, you got small peepees. If you don't know how to use what you got, then expect to live alone and keep jerking off to porn 4 ever!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 957129


Jerking to porn is less dangerous and cheaper
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 21712215


And preferable.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29633615
United States
01/30/2013 06:58 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
I put a potato in my swim trunks
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 22179930


The front or the back?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 19866620
United States
01/30/2013 07:08 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
put a live bee on your junk, that will definately get a reaction.
Balloons

User ID: 6583249
Denmark
01/30/2013 07:18 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
I'm laying there by the pool and I see that there are some fine looking ladies around. I needed a way to get their attention so I went through all the pool filters and scooped out the dead floating bees and wasps.

I laid back down on my lounge chair and place the dead insects all over my body. I played it calm and cool and figured that the girls would look over and see that I was a tough guy laying there with bees and wasps on me and I wasn't even scared or nothing!

That's a way to attract girls at the pool.
 Quoting: Swank Johnson 33262906


lol
Original
Aproved
Put a lion in a cage for years without food and watch what happens.
Its appetite will of cause grow and grow, and then you point your finger at its hunger?
Utu

User ID: 10601066
United States
01/30/2013 07:21 PM

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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
I'm laying there by the pool and I see that there are some fine looking ladies around. I needed a way to get their attention so I went through all the pool filters and scooped out the dead floating bees and wasps.

I laid back down on my lounge chair and place the dead insects all over my body. I played it calm and cool and figured that the girls would look over and see that I was a tough guy laying there with bees and wasps on me and I wasn't even scared or nothing!

That's a way to attract girls at the pool.
 Quoting: Swank Johnson 33262906


Damn!!! What a badass!!!


tounge
GLP HAS MADE ME INTO AN ASSHOLE!
Canundrum
Live well, Laugh often

User ID: 598066
United States
01/30/2013 07:23 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
I put a potato in my swim trunks
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 22179930


Front or back Cletus????


lmao
 Quoting: milehighmike


Gawd, tears from laughing so hard!!!

1rof1
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28767469
United States
01/30/2013 10:37 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
bump
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 13166822
United States
01/30/2013 11:06 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
OP's name is, Swank Johnson.

Deserves 5 stars just for that.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 16290146
United States
01/30/2013 11:14 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
bump
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 23290196
United States
01/30/2013 11:14 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
put a live bee on your junk, that will definately get a reaction.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 19866620


lmaoratdancelol
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 22379963
United States
01/30/2013 11:16 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
rofl

Swank Johnson @ the beach...



[link to www.youtube.com]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1579668
United States
01/30/2013 11:27 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
I just put a giant cuccuzza in my Speedo - works every time!
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 33262906
United States
01/31/2013 01:30 AM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
bump
JUST HERE

User ID: 25610447
United States
01/31/2013 01:31 AM

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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
so basicly , adorn yourself with insect corpses?

well if it works for you all the best to it
 Quoting: ...333...


adorn laugh

Last Edited by JUST HERE on 01/31/2013 01:31 AM
:glp sign:
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 26372742
Canada
01/31/2013 01:40 AM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
lol, I would just think as I walked by: Gross, he's covered in dead insects.
Dr. Greenthumb

User ID: 33315548
United States
01/31/2013 01:44 AM

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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
Better yet buy an exotic insect collection and adorn yourself with colorful butterflies, dragonflies, moths, and beetles, it'll make you look really pretty. If you'd rather go the dangerous route just get some dead tarantulas and scorpions.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 33339064
Greece
01/31/2013 02:34 AM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
Or you could spread shit all over you and women would think that you can cope with any kind of shit!
1doh1
JimBomB

User ID: 33378627
United States
01/31/2013 02:47 AM

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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
13ba
Self delusion can be a grand thing!
MitakuyeOyasin!
TPTB ARE THE MACHINE [link to youtu.be]
[link to youtu.be]
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 6256129
United States
01/31/2013 07:32 PM
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Re: This is how I attract the ladies at the pool.....
bump

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