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Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28830497
United States
02/01/2013 05:49 PM
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Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Attractive co-worker asks me to have dinner with her (yes, I'm married). She said to bring my wife and she would bring husband. That way she said its just having dinner and not just a romantic escapade.

I made up the story that my wife feels uncomfortable because my intuition said that there was something fishy.

I told my friend what happenned and said to him that my I should change my mind and take the offer because my wife and her husband would be right there, that there is no fishy business.

He said I was naive and girls do tricks like that to get guy at the end. But that's crazy, who is crazy enough to do something like that?
Anonymous Coward
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Belgium
02/01/2013 05:54 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
I think you should go!

pick
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 33465676
Costa Rica
02/01/2013 05:59 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
She said "Romantic escapade" ? Then, yeah, I would stay away unless you are open-minded to swingers or dumping your wife. The whole thing sounds like a setup.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 28830497
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02/01/2013 06:00 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
The thing is I want to keep my marriage, then again, perhaps I'm being paranoid
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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02/01/2013 06:01 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
She said "Romantic escapade" ? Then, yeah, I would stay away unless you are open-minded to swingers or dumping your wife. The whole thing sounds like a setup.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33465676


That's the thing, she said it should be fine since there is no one on one involved or romance
CeeLite

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02/01/2013 06:01 PM

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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
If your intuition says something is up then something probably is. Maybe they swing, and want to swap, who knows? But sounds like your not into what she's offering so move on and put it out of your mind:)
Chef.

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02/01/2013 06:03 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
She said "Romantic escapade" ? Then, yeah, I would stay away unless you are open-minded to swingers or dumping your wife. The whole thing sounds like a setup.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33465676


That's the thing, she said it should be fine since there is no one on one involved or romance
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28830497


Run away! setup.
Anonymous Coward
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02/01/2013 06:06 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Don't trust the death trap! I wouldn't go near ANYPLACE with her....some sort of weird, fucked up sort of sexual harassment thing to come shortly after the meeting!
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Anonymous Coward
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02/01/2013 06:08 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Yep, sounds a little weird to me, too. I would say, RUN! Good luck, OP.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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02/01/2013 08:04 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Thanks for your advice guys. I knew deep down inside I felt odd. So I guess this kind of "setup" is her hopes for me to cheat on my wife down the road with her? Thats nuts for her to do that but somehow looks like what it is.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
02/01/2013 08:16 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Thanks for your advice guys. I knew deep down inside I felt odd. So I guess this kind of "setup" is her hopes for me to cheat on my wife down the road with her? Thats nuts for her to do that but somehow looks like what it is.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28830497




I'm not sure why you think that even MIGHT be the case if she said to bring your wife, and she would bring her husband.

Have you not heard the term "double date?" This is how many couples socialize. Nothing weird about that at all. Sure, there are some swingers out there. And so what if they were? You think they're going to slip roofies in your drink and fuck you both at a restaurant while you're passed out?

You seem a touch paranoid. No offense.

Assume they're swingers-- such people will often hint at something to get a feel for the situation before asking outright. If you didn't respond favorably to such explorative questions or comments at dinner, it may even be unlikely they would propose something. And again, this is ASSUMING they're swingers. And let's say they do propose something... you can always do this funny little thing called "saying no."

It goes like this:

"No thanks. We're not into that."

Sounds to me like you might be missing out on socializing, and possibly making some new friends (and hell, maybe even getting some hot, swinger, co-worker pussy LMFAO) due to silly insecure fear. Unless of course you have some other reason to be afraid or suspicious which you haven't mentioned.

That's my opinion.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 28830497
United States
02/01/2013 08:21 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Personally I don't they are swingers either. I've actually asked a females opinion on this and she said what others kinda said. That this girl is trying to go under the radar to eventually do something with me one on one later on.

It's weird how she is going to odd lengths but I could kinda see that's what she is doing. And I'm in no mood for some rendevouZ at all.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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United States
02/01/2013 08:22 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Ask her if she's into anal before making any decisions about the dinner.
 Quoting: John Cocktosen


Lol, I wonder what the odds she is thinking that. Add odd as that sounds, that would be freaking hilarious if she was thinking that
Zuzu's Petals

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02/01/2013 08:26 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
"That way she said its just having dinner and not just a romantic escapade."

Odd comment. "not just" a romantic escapade? Well that to me sounds like she's saying it would be one (a romantic escapade), plus something more, hence the "just." Lord knows what the 'more' would be. Yikes.

Last Edited by Zuzu's Petals on 02/01/2013 08:27 PM
"I don't have pet peeves; I have major psychotic ******* hatreds, okay. And it makes the world a lot easier to sort out." George Carlin

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Anonymous Coward
User ID: 29749468
United States
02/01/2013 08:35 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
My husband get hit on all the time (man in uniform syndrome). The latest was my son's teacher telling him that the only good Mexican food in town was at her house and he would have to come to her house to get it. I say, tell your wife. This is what "whatever her name is" said to me today. Otherwise you may feel like you are hiding something. I had a man chase me through walmart telling me he would come see me when my husband was at work, he saw the ring on my finger. I called my husband laughing about it. No Secrets!!!!
ANHEDONIC

User ID: 26795689
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02/01/2013 08:41 PM

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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Maybe they are swingers and grooming you and your wife for a post-dinner date orgy?

bananasex sideways

"You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger"
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 28830497
United States
02/01/2013 08:42 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
My husband get hit on all the time (man in uniform syndrome). The latest was my son's teacher telling him that the only good Mexican food in town was at her house and he would have to come to her house to get it. I say, tell your wife. This is what "whatever her name is" said to me today. Otherwise you may feel like you are hiding something. I had a man chase me through walmart telling me he would come see me when my husband was at work, he saw the ring on my finger. I called my husband laughing about it. No Secrets!!!!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29749468


Wow! So people do go through crazy initiatives even as far as even meeting your better half in person. What's the world come to or is this now the new norm?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 26673944
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02/01/2013 08:43 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Nope. Her old man is in on it, whatever it is.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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02/01/2013 08:45 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
One more thing! I forgot to mention that she looked a little pissed and was quiet after awhile when I told her I couldn't make it with my wife. Then the next day I said maybe I'll see what I can do with wife and now girl got her hopes up.

I'm avoiding her like plague
ANHEDONIC

User ID: 26795689
United States
02/01/2013 08:46 PM

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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
My husband get hit on all the time (man in uniform syndrome). The latest was my son's teacher telling him that the only good Mexican food in town was at her house and he would have to come to her house to get it. I say, tell your wife. This is what "whatever her name is" said to me today. Otherwise you may feel like you are hiding something. I had a man chase me through walmart telling me he would come see me when my husband was at work, he saw the ring on my finger. I called my husband laughing about it. No Secrets!!!!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29749468


Wow! So people do go through crazy initiatives even as far as even meeting your better half in person. What's the world come to or is this now the new norm?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28830497


Here's some advice... Don't mix your work life with your personal life!

What if your coworker and your wife will hit it off and end up exchanging numbers/email/facebook and they wind up communicating outside of work or you'll be at the office and start having to discuss personal matters you'd rather not bring up in the workplace. Or what if you go out and you and your wife don't enjoy yourselves but the other couple does and the next time they want to get together you end up having to make up awkward excuses that wind up souring your relationship with your coworker at work?

Recipe for disaster.

Last Edited by ANHEDONIC on 02/01/2013 08:49 PM

"You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger"
Anonymous Coward
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02/01/2013 08:48 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Swingers maybe. Say no if you're not into the car keys in the bowl scene.
Anonymous Coward
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02/01/2013 08:52 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Attractive co-worker asks me to have dinner with her (yes, I'm married). She said to bring my wife and she would bring husband. That way she said its just having dinner and not just a romantic escapade.

I made up the story that my wife feels uncomfortable because my intuition said that there was something fishy.

I told my friend what happenned and said to him that my I should change my mind and take the offer because my wife and her husband would be right there, that there is no fishy business.

He said I was naive and girls do tricks like that to get guy at the end. But that's crazy, who is crazy enough to do something like that?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28830497



Coming from a woman who works with attractive men.. Sounds like she's attracted to you but just wants to be friends.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 32331937
United States
02/01/2013 08:56 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
One more thing! I forgot to mention that she looked a little pissed and was quiet after awhile when I told her I couldn't make it with my wife. Then the next day I said maybe I'll see what I can do with wife and now girl got her hopes up.

I'm avoiding her like plague
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28830497


What kind of work do you do op?
Fading Lights

User ID: 23427078
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02/01/2013 08:57 PM

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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
My husband get hit on all the time (man in uniform syndrome). The latest was my son's teacher telling him that the only good Mexican food in town was at her house and he would have to come to her house to get it. I say, tell your wife. This is what "whatever her name is" said to me today. Otherwise you may feel like you are hiding something. I had a man chase me through walmart telling me he would come see me when my husband was at work, he saw the ring on my finger. I called my husband laughing about it. No Secrets!!!!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29749468


Wow! So people do go through crazy initiatives even as far as even meeting your better half in person. What's the world come to or is this now the new norm?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28830497


Here's some advice... Don't mix your work life with your personal life!

What if your coworker and your wife will hit it off and end up exchanging numbers/email/facebook and they wind up communicating outside of work or you'll be at the office and start having to discuss personal matters you'd rather not bring up in the workplace. Or what if you go out and you and your wife don't enjoy yourselves but the other couple does and the next time they want to get together you end up having to make up awkward excuses that wind up souring your relationship with your coworker at work?

Recipe for disaster.
 Quoting: ANHEDONIC


I think your mind is a bit over-reacting to this (re: wife and other husband hooking up-- possible, but not likely). Not really likely at all. Your other advice is good though.
ANHEDONIC

User ID: 26795689
United States
02/01/2013 09:05 PM

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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
I think your mind is a bit over-reacting to this (re: wife and other husband hooking up-- possible, but not likely). Not really likely at all. Your other advice is good though.
 Quoting: Fading Lights


The swinger/orgy post was me being facetious. It was a joke. : )

The 2nd post was me being practical. FYI, OP is male, his coworker is a female. So his wife & coworker 'hitting it off' would be implying the 2 women becoming friends.

If OP didn't already have a bit of a weird vibe about the situation I might not have encouraged him to be so cautious about the situation. But I spent several years working at an office setting and watched first-hand how the drama can unfold when people start mixing their work & personal lives. Plus I watch a lot of Seinfeld episodes and this situation has a classic George Costanza predicament written all over it, haha.

Last Edited by ANHEDONIC on 02/01/2013 09:08 PM

"You will not be punished for your anger, you will be punished by your anger"
Anonymous Coward
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United States
02/01/2013 09:14 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
Attractive co-worker asks me to have dinner with her (yes, I'm married). She said to bring my wife and she would bring husband. That way she said its just having dinner and not just a romantic escapade.

I made up the story that my wife feels uncomfortable because my intuition said that there was something fishy.

I told my friend what happenned and said to him that my I should change my mind and take the offer because my wife and her husband would be right there, that there is no fishy business.

He said I was naive and girls do tricks like that to get guy at the end. But that's crazy, who is crazy enough to do something like that?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 28830497


Some advice...tell your coworker to do something positive in this world. Go save someone (share Christ), go feed the hungry, go visit the elderly, invest time into family and friends, make this world better! We live in a sexed crazy world where it's all about self. Our world is crumbling, if you have not noticed. Get a life ( beyond your job), encourage your co worker to get a life. If you have christ already then get busy sharing and living for HIM! Start a topic that might change the world instead of one that gets pervs thinking about orgys. We do really need to start changing because our world will not change itself!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 32331937
United States
02/01/2013 09:32 PM
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Re: Am I Naive? Married Women Asks me to
pigchef
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