That's right you dead seagull fart smoking hippies.
Your dreams? DESTROYED
Your hopes? DESTROYED
My liver? DESTROYED
It's back to work people. After some vacationing around the world in places like Celyabinsk Russia (where I destroyed a meteor), Sicily Italy (Mt. Etna? yes, that's my work) and various Walmarts (Their financial "total disaster"...), I've decided to return to GLP and continue spreading my gifts of ill will.
For those of you new to the thread, have a look through and admire the work I've already completed. If you have something that needs destroying... By all means please post, then just stay tuned and admire it's untimely demise. I am here to serve.
For returning clientele, it's good to have you back. We pride ourselves on our dedication to eradication here at CalmShockDoom industries. Please refer our 200% off anything that needs destroying coupon when posting and have the pleasure of watching its heinous existence destroyed twice.
Whatever gets you pissed or saddened,
drives you nuts and needs a bad end
Post it here and watch it quiver,
destruction awaits, yes we deliver.
Our complaints department can be reached at EAT_@GLP.com where both you and your complaint will be quickly disposed of with a 8.7 magnitude earthquake.