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How to Get a College Degree or High School Diploma, in Seconds

 
Smitty
User ID: 549407
United States
02/08/2013 05:20 PM
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How to Get a College Degree or High School Diploma, in Seconds
Have you always wanted a College Degree, but can't afford the crippling debt that comes with it?

Perhaps you had a misfortune while young and didn't managed to graduate from High School, but don't want the stigma of a G.E.D. on your record?

Here is a simple, very nearly fool proof method to fix this that:

1. Costs nothing.

2. Takes almost no effort.

3. Will give you the same prestige that a person with a four year degree has earned.


How to do this? Lie, of course.

The trick is to be sensible in the lies you tell. If you claim to have gone to Harvard Law, but can't even pronounce Pro Bono correctly (hint, it's never said "pro boner")someone might just check that out. However, graduating from a lesser known school, or a Community College looks good on paper, and as long as you know the subject matter and are reasonably intelligent, no one will ever bother checking at all.

As to High School... Do you know how often your grades/attendance/graduation status will be checked out by an employer?

About one time out of a thousand. If that.

So lie and say you graduated, from a school out of state. Before you moved.

It's easy and as long as you choose wisely, even a person that went to that school won't know that you didn't.

Plus, outside of movies, that doesn't happen very often at all.

Just make certain you can sound and look the part you choose to play, and this next bit is important, so pay attention...

Keep your story consistent!

If you say you graduated from the University of Oregon for instance, known where the campus is, what the school mascot is and how to pronounce the name of the State. Then make sure you memorize when you "graduated" and keep that in mind, so you never get confused.

Even better, pick a Community College. They tend to have so many people that a few minutes with an old class catalog will have you ready to go as far as background information is concerned. Again, no one ever lies about that, so almost no one ever checks. If they do, well, you won't get the job, but they probably won't even call you on it. No, they'll just shuffle the paper to the bottom of the pile and move on.

So there you go, you're a High School or College graduate now, without the crippling debt.

Just don't claim to be a Doctor, Lawyer or physicist and you should be fine.

"I have a B.A. in Advertising." is fine and something you can back.

"I'm a brain surgeon." might be a little harder.

Good luck!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27528371
United States
02/08/2013 05:40 PM
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Re: How to Get a College Degree or High School Diploma, in Seconds
Or just claim you went to Accidental College and are a class mate of Barry..

Accidental College is a private, co-educational liberal arts college.

"Axy" as it is affectionately called by students and alumni, is one of the oldest liberal arts colleges.

Accidental still retains the progressive and egalitarian values of its founders..

[link to en.wikipedia.org]
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 549407
United States
02/08/2013 05:43 PM
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Re: How to Get a College Degree or High School Diploma, in Seconds
Or just claim you went to Accidental College and are a class mate of Barry..

Accidental College is a private, co-educational liberal arts college.

"Axy" as it is affectionately called by students and alumni, is one of the oldest liberal arts colleges.

Accidental still retains the progressive and egalitarian values of its founders..

[link to en.wikipedia.org]
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27528371


Yes. Look how hard it is to get records from them?
Barry Obama
User ID: 33832742
United States
02/08/2013 05:46 PM
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Re: How to Get a College Degree or High School Diploma, in Seconds
I was the editor of the Harvard Law Review. ohyeah
Hardwired

User ID: 33883305
United States
02/08/2013 05:48 PM

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Re: How to Get a College Degree or High School Diploma, in Seconds
I've "stolen" a job that required a bachelor's degree. Claimed I had a degree in psych from a state university that I actually did attend. I borrowed my then girlfriend's transcripts from that same university (where she graduated with a BA in Psychology) and doctored them with my name, even went to the trouble of having a fake rubber stamp made to make them look more official.

I needn't have bothered with the rubber stamp. They took me at my word and though they asked for the transcripts, never followed up on it as I never brought the doctored ones in.

I think the interview cinched the job. After all, I was articulate and seemed genuinely interested in working there.

Long story short, it was a desk job and I hated it. Surrounded by a bunch of gossip girls. I lasted a few months, then got a driving job and put in my two weeks notice.

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