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Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?

 
En Sof
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02/09/2013 12:05 PM
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Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
Many of you saw my other thread, Thread: Help me. I think I'm suffering from DID (Dissociative Identity Disorder). - although there were a lot of naysayers and shills that for whatever reason either denied everything that I was saying as if I was just trying to get attention or sympathy or they attacked me for simply reaching out for help on this forum instead of going to talk to a doctor or therapist, which many of you know are just as corrupt as those who abused me. Despite these people that have really hurt my feelings and made this process a thousand times more difficult, I am holding my head up high a little while longer and I wanted to thank those of you who offered support and encouragement.

As of making that post I have spoken to two close members of my family and both of them were in tears and told me that they are so happy that I have come forward and confirmed what they suspected for so, so long. My parents (as well as the other abusers in my family) have been confronted but any time anyone would ask questions or demand answers my abusers would turn around and cast blame and throw stones at those who were innocent and then keep the innocent members of my family from seeing me. My abusers have also been investigated already by CPS and nothing ever came from it.

The abuse runs much deeper than SRA - I say SRA because although I don't remember any blatant occult or satanic activity the act of continually torturing, beating, humiliating and raping a child is satanic in and of itself and I say ritual because it happened on a day-to-day basis for many years. However, there was multidimensional layers of mind control programming that has been applied as well which has caused me to no longer see my abusers in a negative light. I came to accept it as part of a loving family and was rewarded greatly for it. It wasn't until I got older and started to resent them that everyone turned on me and I was discarded like a black sheep - rejected by my family and left to go fend for myself either couch surfing and staying with friends or staying in shelters.

I don't know why they are doing this to me or who they are or what they want but it is so far-reaching and goes so deep. I've dated girls in the past who later admitted to me that they were hired by my parents to date me and keep tabs on me. I've made completely random friends and acquaintances who I find out have parents who are close friends with my parents. I've had employers write reports about my work behavior and send them to my parents (as a full grown man).

Now the absolute worst thing is going on. I'm having people in my town circulate rumors about me, telling their children that they are not able to play at my house with my little brother because they don't trust their kids around me. Making me sound like I'm some kind of sick pervert or pedophile and other people in the town are asking questions about why they would say these things and pushing and pressing the issue as if to imply there must be some truth to the rumors. I'm devestated and heartbroken and I would NEVER EVER hurt a child and now my peace has been taken away. I am slowly being pushed out of my home. Out of my community. I've tried confronting these parents that have circulated these rumors and none of them are willing to talk to me, which I find odd because if I thought someone was molesting my children you better believe if that person showed up at my house asking whats going on I'd let them know!! I'm suspecting that these parents making the rumors are ALSO part of this and probably molesting and abusing their children and now that I am 'waking up' and 'deprogramming' so to speak this is a form of damage control.

I'm really at my wits end. I just want a normal life. I want to be able to keep a job. To work. To make an honest living. To have a girlfriend. A healthy relationship. To know what love feels like. To not be seen and perceived as some kind of monster. To not have people hunt me down like a witch. To not be cast out of every community like a demon. I want to be happy. I want to be accepted. I want to know what 'family' is. I want to know what 'peace' is. Everyone who has ever gotten close to me has told me the same thing. That there is a 'big black cloud' that follows me around. That I'm a 'blackhole'. A 'tsunami' or 'hurricane'. A 'destroyer'. That all I do is destroy, consume and just downright fuck up everything and everyone around me. I try to turn to God but am so condemned by the choices I've made in my past to believe he could ever love or forgive me.

Does anyone know what this feels like? People always tell me I'm not alone. But..does anyone REALLY know what this feels like?

Please don't tell me to go to a 'support group' or a 'shrink' or 'therapist'. I want to know from YOU. I want to know from the people here because this is one of the only places I feel safe. I may not feel accepted. I may be ridiculed. Mocked. Made fun of. And degraded. But I still love many of you and I love this place.

So those of you willing to help me cope and make sense of this, I thank you.

Everyone else. Well, whatever.
CeeLite
>>Haida Gwaii

User ID: 33205178
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02/09/2013 12:45 PM

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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
Hey!
:)
Pray this thing doesn't hit or sink [link to twitter.com]
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En Sof (OP)

User ID: 2760356
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02/09/2013 12:46 PM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
Hey!
:)
 Quoting: CeeLite


Hello..
En Sof (OP)

User ID: 33545266
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02/09/2013 10:24 PM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
No one? :(

hiding
CeeLite
>>Haida Gwaii

User ID: 33205178
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02/09/2013 10:28 PM

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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
The further you can physically get away from this the better. Small towns are bad for rumors.

That's all I got for now lol! And I friended you the other night, there's that lol. Gave you some karma too lol.

Last Edited by CeeLite on 02/09/2013 10:28 PM
Pray this thing doesn't hit or sink [link to twitter.com]
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En Sof (OP)

User ID: 33545266
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02/09/2013 10:47 PM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
The further you can physically get away from this the better. Small towns are bad for rumors.

That's all I got for now lol! And I friended you the other night, there's that lol. Gave you some karma too lol.
 Quoting: CeeLite


I PM'ed you CeeLite.
En Sof (OP)

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02/09/2013 10:52 PM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
CeeLite
>>Haida Gwaii

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02/09/2013 11:35 PM

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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
Are you able to work? If not what happens when you try to work? What I'm getting at is inspired by the other thread that started at the same time, maybe you can't keep jobs because of this you could apply for SSI.
Pray this thing doesn't hit or sink [link to twitter.com]
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CeeLite
>>Haida Gwaii

User ID: 33205178
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02/09/2013 11:57 PM

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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
And put yourself on a section 8 waiting list. Those take a least a year to get on, often longer.

Often the place that does Section 8 with have a separate "site based" places that are faster to get into especially for a single person, they are often small studios or very small one bedrooms. Usually the people in those properties are elderly and disabled of all types of disabled, physical, and mental.

If you get SSI it doesn't mean you don't or can't work, but it's a good safety net for someone at risk. That way when they have difficult times they don't become homeless, which can made everything worse.

You can get foodstamps NOW especially if you say you are trying to get on disablity or are disabled verses "unemployed". If you get on SSI you will also be eligible for foodstamps and healthcare.

Some states have GAU(?) grants still, and it's income for disabled of a couple hundred a month.

Obamaphones, also cover landlines, and can get you a home phone for about $10 a month, that isn't a cell phone.

Also just so you know, there is housing available to "mentally ill" that isn't available to normal handicapped people. I am not sure who it's sponsored through even in my own state but I've seen it. And there are "lists" you can find, with these places as well. This isn't the best option, but it's better than being homeless if you end up in that type of situation and you'd be living in close proximity to people who cannot fuction as well as "normal" people in society, so it can be a bit un nerving if your highly functional.
Pray this thing doesn't hit or sink [link to twitter.com]
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stillhere

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02/11/2013 03:49 AM

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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
Thinking of you and your plight. I understand how you feel. Perhaps, since youare safe from the abuse now you should focus on finding work so you can be independant. Possibly even deny it happened. False memories until you are safely on your own. If you get a job with a national chain you could move.

You will make friends at work and feel better to be on your own.
hf
"You can bend it and twist it... You can misuse and abuse it... But even God cannot change the Truth.”
Michael Levy
Anonymous Coward
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02/25/2013 01:10 PM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?


the act of continually torturing, beating, humiliating and raping a child is satanic..


The Lord will reward you greatly for your sacrifices So swallow it and take it like a good boy OP!
Anonymous Coward
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02/27/2013 03:32 AM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
yoda
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02/27/2013 04:02 AM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
Glad to hear OP.

I hope you keep us posted on your recovery.

I have a background in psychology and NLP.

And I have read mountains of stuff on SRA and DID.

But I don't have enough hands on experience to feel qualified to help you in any way.

If there's anything specific you need help with, let me know.

I'll try to help you find answers/solutions.
Anonymous Coward
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02/27/2013 02:35 PM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
Had the same thing happen to me-
Keep the faith
Anonymous Coward
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02/27/2013 05:35 PM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
Move away.
Don't leave a forwarding address.
Don't make contact.
The end.
Anonymous Coward
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03/04/2013 09:08 AM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
bump
Smilinguniverse
User ID: 5876962
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04/03/2013 11:35 PM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
I am right there with you...only I am eight months pregnant and they are trying to get me to put my child up for adoption.... They tell me i'm delusional.... I have an older brother who mentally and occasionally physically abuses me... Our family has natzi, masonic , and jesuit connections... Highly driven by male energy... My short name is Cat ....which is the nickname for the deltas... My nickname is lulu...no idea why, but its the name of the original annunaki conduit concubine sex slaves used for breeding... I watched the moon cycles closely this past summer, starting with super moon and the blue moon in july....the night I knew I was pregnant, a waning blood red crescent set on the horizon, indicating an ominous event had just occured. The father of my child is very wealthy...and very evil. He pushed hard for me to abort...when it was clear I wouldnt he started slandering me in our small town, claiming he would get custody....now he says if the child cannot be with him.than I should put it up for adoption, but if I keep it, he will not acknowledge it at all. He is 37 & his family attends catholic services and social gatherings with my family...our folks have even had dinner together...and they support his decision....its so twisted...but I have kept my cool...but now out of left field my folks and family are turning on me....because i'm upset and distraught about what to do...they actually served me a 30 day eviction notice while I'm 34 weeks pregnant, told me I need to be put in a mental institute, and give the.baby to his parents to raise....these are people who up until a month ago were helping me get ready and buying baby clothes and assembling the crib with.me! But they had some socialite dinner inbetween and now they are bff with his folks and I'm unfit, even though I have been getting a 4.0 in school, holding a job, paying for all my/babys needs as well as saving money, attending parenting classes, working with a midwife and a doula, eating organic goodness and taking care of my body...toxin free...while babys father has no job no goals a regular seat at the local bars and has been seen with unidentified and strange women...yet I'm the unstable one :/ this is just my current situation and the tip of the iceberg
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 15706864
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04/04/2013 12:11 AM
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What's your blood type?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 15706864
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04/04/2013 11:35 AM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
It's really odd that you you use terms like DID & SRA without offering any specifics about possible alters, triggers, Satanism, etc.

Also, in my reading of your first thread it appears that you never responded to questions about your screen name and its likely Kabbalistic connotations.

Lastly, you make vague assertions about your family's connections, but offer no details. You could easily offer some more broad details without revealing specifics.

If you want to have some credibility I think you ought to address these issues.
Smilinguniverse
User ID: 4747199
United States
04/04/2013 11:49 AM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
I would have to be checked...but I am blonde and blue eyed...adopted into this family...my menstrual cycle is very very regular, long, and heavy. Is this what youre.eluding to?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 4747199
United States
04/04/2013 12:03 PM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
Sorry I meant to quote anonymous coward
Smilinguniverse
User ID: 4747199
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04/04/2013 12:04 PM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
Sorry I meant to quote anonymous coward
Little Lion Man (OP)

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04/04/2013 12:05 PM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
I am right there with you...only I am eight months pregnant and they are trying to get me to put my child up for adoption.... They tell me i'm delusional.... I have an older brother who mentally and occasionally physically abuses me... Our family has natzi, masonic , and jesuit connections... Highly driven by male energy... My short name is Cat ....which is the nickname for the deltas... My nickname is lulu...no idea why, but its the name of the original annunaki conduit concubine sex slaves used for breeding... I watched the moon cycles closely this past summer, starting with super moon and the blue moon in july....the night I knew I was pregnant, a waning blood red crescent set on the horizon, indicating an ominous event had just occured. The father of my child is very wealthy...and very evil. He pushed hard for me to abort...when it was clear I wouldnt he started slandering me in our small town, claiming he would get custody....now he says if the child cannot be with him.than I should put it up for adoption, but if I keep it, he will not acknowledge it at all. He is 37 & his family attends catholic services and social gatherings with my family...our folks have even had dinner together...and they support his decision....its so twisted...but I have kept my cool...but now out of left field my folks and family are turning on me....because i'm upset and distraught about what to do...they actually served me a 30 day eviction notice while I'm 34 weeks pregnant, told me I need to be put in a mental institute, and give the.baby to his parents to raise....these are people who up until a month ago were helping me get ready and buying baby clothes and assembling the crib with.me! But they had some socialite dinner inbetween and now they are bff with his folks and I'm unfit, even though I have been getting a 4.0 in school, holding a job, paying for all my/babys needs as well as saving money, attending parenting classes, working with a midwife and a doula, eating organic goodness and taking care of my body...toxin free...while babys father has no job no goals a regular seat at the local bars and has been seen with unidentified and strange women...yet I'm the unstable one :/ this is just my current situation and the tip of the iceberg
 Quoting: Smilinguniverse 5876962


A couple of things struck me about this. You mentioned the Nazi/Mason/Jesuit connections which fascinates me due to my genetic makeup and family history. I know what you mean about being made to feel like you are delusional. Why are they wanting you to get rid of the baby? Does it have anything to do with the DNA of the baby if it is bred through your bloodline? I'm sorry to hear about all that you are going through. I have a feeling you actually understand. Keep me informed! Hope everything works out. Be safe!
Smilinguniverse
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04/04/2013 12:18 PM
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Yes, it must have to do with the cushion bloodline....and my blood, mixing with "theirs" [link to www.whale.to]
Smilinguniverse
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04/04/2013 12:18 PM
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Yes, it must have to do with the cushion bloodline....and my blood, mixing with "theirs" [link to www.whale.to]
Little Lion Man (OP)

User ID: 25150416
United States
04/04/2013 03:42 PM
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Yes, it must have to do with the cushion bloodline....and my blood, mixing with "theirs" [link to www.whale.to]
 Quoting: Smilinguniverse 4747199


I really don't know how to pick apart my family history because I've been fed such a banquet of lies my whole life and have gorged myself sick upon them. I want to find out who they really are and what they are really trying to do. Why put me through the suffering that they did? Why make me into this? For their own sick entertainment?
Anonymous Coward
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04/05/2013 03:32 AM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
OP, are you going to respond to my questions??
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 15706864
United States
04/05/2013 03:40 AM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
It's really odd that you you use terms like DID & SRA without offering any specifics about possible alters, triggers, Satanism, etc.

Also, in my reading of your first thread it appears that you never responded to questions about your screen name and its likely Kabbalistic connotations.

Lastly, you make vague assertions about your family's connections, but offer no details. You could easily offer some more broad details without revealing specifics.

If you want to have some credibility I think you ought to address these issues.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 15706864


OP, this was intended for you. I am increasingly skeptical of your claims.
Ibrahim

User ID: 29705895
United Kingdom
04/05/2013 05:00 AM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
cut them all off, it works.
The farther away you are the better.
If you end up dead, it doesnt matter.
I would rather be a junkie and die of an overdose than be with these satanic idiots.
I was wrong in thinking that I could escape, I dodnt make it.
I alwys thought that I should just let myself go completely, drugs, sleep rough, beg and hope to die.
Part of me envies those poeple, its just I hate the cold weather, I would rather be in Africa on a beach or something.
Poeple think you have no right to run away from these satanic people, especially if they are blonde with blue eyes!!!!!!!!!
You loose all your rights overnight.
It is no sin to go live on the streets of some country far away and let God take care of you hoping to not wake up in the morning.
These people are happy when you are down.
If they can make a buck out of your demise they will do that too.
Seriously save yourself the torture of learning the depth of depravity these poeple will go to and dont even believe them when they claim to be trying to help you.
Dont believe them, never.
Ibrahim
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04/05/2013 05:09 AM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
I really don't know how to pick apart my family history because I've been fed such a banquet of lies my whole life and have gorged myself sick upon them. I want to find out who they really are and what they are really trying to do. Why put me through the suffering that they did? Why make me into this? For their own sick entertainment?
 Quoting: Little Lion Man


Get a DNA test.
Anonymous Coward
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04/05/2013 05:10 AM
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Re: Possible DID/MPD - Victim of Satanic Ritual Abuse & Mind Control - What's Next?
cut them all off, it works.
The farther away you are the better.
If you end up dead, it doesnt matter.
<snip>
 Quoting: Ibrahim


Figured out how to get off the planet yet?

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