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Hey Everyone! I'm Back!

 
Jesus
User ID: 26371136
United States
02/11/2013 08:56 PM
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Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
Sorry I took so long. Anyways, I really need you to give me all of your money in order to act out God's plan. Just give me your bank account info and I will do the rest. See you in Heaven my loyal sheep.
#Geomagnetic_Storm#
"Amateur Meteorologist"

User ID: 34059817
United States
02/11/2013 09:06 PM

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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
What's up Jesus
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 26371136
United States
02/11/2013 09:09 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
A lot, but all I can say is that I need all of your money asap. It's really important.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27749763
02/11/2013 09:10 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
I was hoping that Jebus would be coming.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 3050899
United States
02/11/2013 09:11 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
we dont have any money. the government beat you to it, i hear they gave it all to a few large banks, some in the US some in europe. go check there.
Middle Class Gangster

User ID: 28115524
Canada
02/11/2013 09:12 PM

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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
where were you?
Long live the Legit Republic of Blanketsburgh
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 7554855
Canada
02/11/2013 09:16 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
A lot, but all I can say is that I need all of your money asap. It's really important.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 26371136


Go ask Obummer, he has all the people's money. Since your
a brother of his, I'm sure he would be happy to give you
a loan.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 26371136
United States
02/11/2013 09:17 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
we dont have any money. the government beat you to it, i hear they gave it all to a few large banks, some in the US some in europe. go check there.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 3050899


Well then I need you to go get the money out of the banks. Tell them that Jesus sent you to take all of their money. I'm sure they will be happy to meet you my fine mansheep.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 26371136
United States
02/11/2013 09:18 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
where were you?
 Quoting: Middle Class Gangster


Partying it up in paradise man! Good times good times!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 33299336
United States
02/11/2013 09:19 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
are you gonna' be the next pope?
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 26371136
United States
02/11/2013 09:20 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
I was hoping that Jebus would be coming.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27749763


You just fuckin mispelled my name man! Have fun in Hell.
WindyMind

User ID: 7244814
United States
02/11/2013 09:21 PM

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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
I have a bone to pick with you Jesus!

halbird2
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 26371136
United States
02/11/2013 09:22 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
are you gonna' be the next pope?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33299336


Naw I just wanna get some dollar bills man so I can hit up some strip clubs!
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 26371136
United States
02/11/2013 09:23 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
are you gonna' be the next pope?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33299336


Naw I just wanna get some dollar bills man so I can hit up some strip clubs!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 26371136


I mean act out God's plan.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 945308
New Zealand
02/11/2013 09:24 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
I have a bone to pick with you Jesus!
 Quoting: WindyMind


Yeah, you lying sack of shit


Prophets words are those of lies.


Zechariah 13:4 On that day every prophet will be ashamed of his prophetic vision; neither shall they wear a rough garment to deceive: (5) But he shall say, I am no prophet, I am an husbandman (farmer); for man taught me to keep cattle (people) from my youth.’ (6) If someone asks him, ‘What are these wounds on your body?’ he will answer, ‘The wounds I was given at the house of my friends.

John 15:1 I am the true vine, (house of Judah) and my Father is the husbandman.

Revelation 19:10 And I fell at his feet to worship him. And he said unto me, See thou do it not: I am thy fellowservant, and of thy brethren that have the testimony of Jesus: worship God: for the testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy.
.
Axo Azeratel

User ID: 20063747
Canada
02/11/2013 09:25 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
blink

nocomment
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 26371136
United States
02/11/2013 09:30 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
I have a bone to pick with you Jesus!
 Quoting: WindyMind


And my buddy Satan has an even bigger one that he likes to bone people like you in the ass with. He's got a bunch of stds too by the way. Have fun in HELL!!!
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 26371136
United States
02/11/2013 09:33 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
I have a bone to pick with you Jesus!
 Quoting: WindyMind


Yeah, you lying sack of shit


Prophets words are those of lies.


Zechariah 13:4 On that day every prophet will be ashamed of his prophetic vision; neither shall they wear a rough garment to deceive: (5) But he shall say, I am no prophet, I am an husbandman (farmer); for man taught me to keep cattle (people) from my youth.’ (6) If someone asks him, ‘What are these wounds on your body?’ he will answer, ‘The wounds I was given at the house of my friends.

John 15:1 I am the true vine, (house of Judah) and my Father is the husbandman.

Revelation 19:10 And I fell at his feet to worship him. And he said unto me, See thou do it not: I am thy fellowservant, and of thy brethren that have the testimony of Jesus: worship God: for the testimony of Jesus is the spirit of prophecy.
.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 945308


drevil
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User ID: 29130092
United States
02/11/2013 09:44 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
If this was the REAL "jesus" most Caucasians would be DEAD.

Read Isaiah 63
WindyMind

User ID: 7244814
United States
02/11/2013 09:49 PM

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Aug4EQ

Take a look at your next incarnation, and know that you will be attacked by wasps to boot.

halbird2
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 945308
New Zealand
02/11/2013 09:54 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
Jesus

A self confessed liar ...

John 5:3I If I bear witness about myself, my witness is false.
.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 945308
New Zealand
02/11/2013 10:00 PM
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Re: Hey Everyone! I'm Back!
If this was the REAL "jesus" most Caucasians would be DEAD.

Read Isaiah 63
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 29130092


All of Isaiah is against white people, these verses are the worst ...

Isaiah 61:5 And strangers shall stand and feed your flocks, and the sons of the alien shall be your plowmen and your vinedressers.

Isaiah 61:6 But ye shall be named the Priests of the LORD: men shall call you the Ministers of our God: ye shall eat the riches of the Gentiles, and in their glory shall ye boast yourselves.

All of Isaiah deals with the false prophet Jesus and how he is sent by god to destroy our lands and steal from us.

What a surprise!
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