No no.

God created us at first because he was lonely. Adam n Eve.

Then... Satan fucked us up.

So God was like... Hmmm.... I'm not sure which ones are fucked up now or not. So I'll watch 'em. The ones that are fucked up I will burn in Hell forever. And the ones that are okay, I will take up to Heaven...

After awhile God noticed he was only getting a trickle of good people into heaven. He looked down at the planet and was like... "Whaaa?"

So he flooded the place and tried to start over.

This worked for a bit, and then there was some more trouble.

God looked down and noticed that the Egyptians were really fucking up the Jews. And God was like, "I like Jews way more than anyone else. They play the harp really well up here in heaven."

So he killed a bunch of Egyptians and freed the Jews.

But then he was like... "I dunno. A lot of these Jews might be fucked up too."

So he had them walk through the desert and stuff. And he started 'testing' them really really hard. By totally making their lives miserable.

And then...

God looked down and the Jews had been taken over by the pharysees or whatever.

So God was like, "Ugh. Should I flood them? Should I smite them? Hmmm... lets try something different."

So God created a son in Mary with a bunch of love power.

Jesus reminded everyone to Love God no matter what. And showed them by allowing himself to be crucified and tortured. A typical execution of the day.

And the Jews were like... "I get it. This is all a test. And if we stick with God no matter what.... we go to Heaven!"

And then...

up to present God hasn't had to come back and do anything. So apparently there are enough good people going to heaven.

That's about it.

So all the foreigners n stuff, n people who were born without knowledge of the bible. God judges them too. And sends some heaven and burns the rest for fuel or whatever. And I guess he likes enough of them that he doesn't have to come down and intervene in their lives. They are making their quotas.

So Earth is like a 'good people' making factory. And it has lots of quality control testing done all the time.

And the only reason God came down and even made the Bible be written is because things were so fucked up that everyone was going to Hell.

Kind of like if you have a bottle factory, and ninety nine percent of your bottles were coming out cracked. You'd have to go into the plant and tweak the bottle maker.

And at some point in the future, when enough good people have been made, God is going close down the plant, and sort out the people who are left.

At any rate... I just made all that up. That actually makes a sort of sense.

The truth is Christians have no answer for that question. Because they force themselves not to think, and atrophy portions of their brains.

And I didn't make that up. Scientific fact.