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im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,

 
Ava Smith (OP)

User ID: 34919966
United States
02/21/2013 10:45 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
Go hang out on the Santa Cruz beach boardwalk after hours. You'll find some hanging out there.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31733515


???
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 16873984
United States
02/21/2013 10:45 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
I can turn you into a psychic vampire, but not a bloodsucker...sorry.

Good news is psychic vamps can feed whenever they want, and generally cause less fuss when drawing lifeforce as most aren't even aware of what's happening.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34918615


whats yhe difference between a psychic vampire and a bloodsucking one?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


A lot less mess with a psychic vampire

no blood
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 32538141


that's no fun!
luc

User ID: 34387484
United States
02/21/2013 10:46 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
Sure, I'll turn you, but first you gotta do something for me.
(zipper noise)
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 32538141
United States
02/21/2013 10:46 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
...


Go talk to Bram Stoker
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 32538141


whose that?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


He can help you

he knows a heap about vampires
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 32538141


how do i look him up or whatever?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


I would do an intranet search first
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 34902527
Australia
02/21/2013 10:46 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
...


Go talk to Bram Stoker
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 32538141


whose that?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


Fail
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34902527


?
 Quoting: Ava Smith

well you could search the name on the interwebbys so you can feel like a dick for not knowing.
how old are you?im thinking an under 20yo twi/tard
Ava Smith (OP)

User ID: 34919966
United States
02/21/2013 10:47 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
Sure, I'll turn you, but first you gotta do something for me.
(zipper noise)
 Quoting: luc


huh?
Ava Smith (OP)

User ID: 34919966
United States
02/21/2013 10:47 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
...


whose that?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


Fail
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34902527


?
 Quoting: Ava Smith

well you could search the name on the interwebbys so you can feel like a dick for not knowing.
how old are you?im thinking an under 20yo twi/tard
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34902527


i am 20
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 34918615
United States
02/21/2013 10:48 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
I can turn you into a psychic vampire, but not a bloodsucker...sorry.

Good news is psychic vamps can feed whenever they want, and generally cause less fuss when drawing lifeforce as most aren't even aware of what's happening.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34918615


whats the difference between a psychic vampire and a bloodsucking one?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


Psychic Vampires draw on the energy lifeforce of a being, while Bloodsuckers, as their name implies, merely draws on the physical lifeforce of the being.

Psychic Vampires generally get away with feeding a lot more than their hemophiliac counterparts, since there's no laws against attacking a person's energy and generally no way of knowing that they fed off of you, save that after just being in their company you will usually feel very exhausted.

Of course, we can also feed off of anything that holds energy - computers, batteries, wind, energy drinks (for us they quite literally live up to their name) etc...anything that has energy can be drawn from.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 33589735
United States
02/21/2013 10:50 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
...


Go talk to Bram Stoker
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 32538141


whose that?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


He can help you

he knows a heap about vampires
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 32538141


how do i look him up or whatever?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


You are so fucking stupid.Get a job,life,girlfriend,boyfriend and lay off the twilight.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 34902527
Australia
02/21/2013 10:50 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
...


Fail
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34902527


?
 Quoting: Ava Smith

well you could search the name on the interwebbys so you can feel like a dick for not knowing.
how old are you?im thinking an under 20yo twi/tard
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34902527


i am 20
 Quoting: Ava Smith


hmm yes about that.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 957683
United States
02/21/2013 10:51 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
Go hang out on the Santa Cruz beach boardwalk after hours. You'll find some hanging out there.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31733515


West side
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 5110157
United States
02/21/2013 10:52 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
I can turn you into a psychic vampire, but not a bloodsucker...sorry.

Good news is psychic vamps can feed whenever they want, and generally cause less fuss when drawing lifeforce as most aren't even aware of what's happening.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34918615


whats the difference between a psychic vampire and a bloodsucking one?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


Psychic Vampires draw on the energy lifeforce of a being, while Bloodsuckers, as their name implies, merely draws on the physical lifeforce of the being.

Psychic Vampires generally get away with feeding a lot more than their hemophiliac counterparts, since there's no laws against attacking a person's energy and generally no way of knowing that they fed off of you, save that after just being in their company you will usually feel very exhausted.

Of course, we can also feed off of anything that holds energy - computers, batteries, wind, energy drinks (for us they quite literally live up to their name) etc...anything that has energy can be drawn from.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34918615


You remind me of my ex girlfriends friend that she talks to thru skype that thinks he is a incarnation of a dragon with weapons forged for him by elvish people. In other words get off the computer and go outside for once. You might see the real world instead of being swept into your own delusions to avoid the cost of emotional and or physical pain put unto you by others or caused by your own feelings of mortal guilt from your upbringing.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 33797613
United States
02/21/2013 10:54 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
im a vampire. i know some vampires. there is an organization of us. i could contact a vampire local to you. they will come turn you tonight. what is your address
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 32538141
United States
02/21/2013 10:58 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
OP

why would you even want to be a vampire?

If there was even such a thing

and I hope you really don't believe in this

You need some help if you really are not joking around and think vampires are real.

I am not kidding.

Stop watching those moronic shows and go do some volunteer work

or get a job!
Dr. AculaModerator
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User ID: 5240
United States
02/21/2013 10:58 PM

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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
well, you're most likely not one. so, dont waste my time.
 Quoting: Ava Smith


Do you actually expect a real vampire to come and turn you...

you must consider this...

before I would make anyone my fledgling and have to deal with their childish vampiric follies for all of eternity... I would have to be damn certain they werent a fuckface...

there would be lots and lots and lots of guidelines... STRICT guidelines... not everyone can act responsible enough to handle the gift of 'forever'

and most certainly I wouldnt pick someone off the internet...

And i most certainly would not pick someone just because they "wanted" it...

what would you offer me... your sire? hmmmmm?

Why would I do it for free?

Nothing is free... NOTHING... if you want something you must earn it... you must pay the way... things do not just fall out of the sky... because you want them to...

If I were to spend my time turning you... teaching you, and making sure you didnt decide to take leaps off of skyscrapers onto the street, creating a spectacle, and ending up on CNN...
you know like in that movie underworld...

what would be in it for me?!

you cant act as you want if you are burdened with the gift of vampiracy... you must be discreet and follow guidelines...

not everyone can... some think its cool to use their vampiric burdens as an awesome display of power to panic humans... that is a no no.

So why would I waste my time on someone who isnt willing to offer me something in return? when i would have to devote much time training, teaching and making sure you werent another fuckface on a power trip...

my advice Fleshmonger... enjoy getting old, enjoy the pains of mortality... and enjoy death when it comes...

Vampirism is a burden... not a blessing...

and im as real of a vampire you are gonna find online...

...i wouldnt wager any cash on the legitimacy of vampires really existing else where either...

Vampires sell books, movies, merchandise, games and whatever else... why... because they are enchanting, romantic, mysterious... but just like any other product out there... they are a facade... a gimmick... a method of prying you of your cash to line the pockets of others...

Last Edited by Dr. Acula on 02/21/2013 11:02 PM
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 32538141
United States
02/21/2013 10:59 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
im a vampire. i know some vampires. there is an organization of us. i could contact a vampire local to you. they will come turn you tonight. what is your address
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33797613


stop shilling

those who need real help!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 34918615
United States
02/21/2013 10:59 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
You remind me of my ex girlfriends friend that she talks to thru skype that thinks he is a incarnation of a dragon with weapons forged for him by elvish people. In other words get off the computer and go outside for once. You might see the real world instead of being swept into your own delusions to avoid the cost of emotional and or physical pain put unto you by others or caused by your own feelings of mortal guilt from your upbringing.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 5110157


Ah...it is so easy for the close-minded to believe that other beings do not actually exist. But then again, you have not yet experienced anything beyond the realm of the ordinary, so have no reason to.

Move along, human. wink
Dr. AculaModerator
Forum Moderator

User ID: 5240
United States
02/21/2013 11:00 PM

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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
im a rapist. i know some rapist. there is an organization of us. i could contact a rapist local to you. they will come rape you tonight. what is your address
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33797613


Fixed that for you^
AllGunsBlazing

User ID: 23985283
United States
02/21/2013 11:03 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
They're in Mexico City, but I heard they're leaving soon, so you better hurry.
Dr. AculaModerator
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User ID: 5240
United States
02/21/2013 11:03 PM

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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
...


Go talk to Bram Stoker
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 32538141


whose that?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


He can help you

he knows a heap about vampires
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 32538141


how do i look him up or whatever?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


He wrote a book about me...

[link to en.wikipedia.org]
Ava Smith (OP)

User ID: 34919966
United States
02/21/2013 11:06 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
im a vampire. i know some vampires. there is an organization of us. i could contact a vampire local to you. they will come turn you tonight. what is your address
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33797613


stop shilling

those who need real help!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 32538141


i would not give my address over the internet for all too see. how do i know you're real?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 34918378
Germany
02/21/2013 11:06 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
if anyone can help please reply on this. pleasee, i really want this.
 Quoting: vampire


Why do you want to become a vampire?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 7701046
United States
02/21/2013 11:06 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
well, you're most likely not one. so, dont waste my time.
 Quoting: Ava Smith


Do you actually expect a real vampire to come and turn you...

you must consider this...

before I would make anyone my fledgling and have to deal with their childish vampiric follies for all of eternity... I would have to be damn certain they werent a fuckface...

there would be lots and lots and lots of guidelines... STRICT guidelines... not everyone can act responsible enough to handle the gift of 'forever'

and most certainly I wouldnt pick someone off the internet...

And i most certainly would not pick someone just because they "wanted" it...

what would you offer me... your sire? hmmmmm?

Why would I do it for free?

Nothing is free... NOTHING... if you want something you must earn it... you must pay the way... things do not just fall out of the sky... because you want them to...

If I were to spend my time turning you... teaching you, and making sure you didnt decide to take leaps off of skyscrapers onto the street, creating a spectacle, and ending up on CNN...
you know like in that movie underworld...

what would be in it for me?!

you cant act as you want if you are burdened with the gift of vampiracy... you must be discreet and follow guidelines...

not everyone can... some think its cool to use their vampiric burdens as an awesome display of power to panic humans... that is a no no.

So why would I waste my time on someone who isnt willing to offer me something in return? when i would have to devote much time training, teaching and making sure you werent another fuckface on a power trip...

my advice Fleshmonger... enjoy getting old, enjoy the pains of mortality... and enjoy death when it comes...

Vampirism is a burden... not a blessing...

and im as real of a vampire you are gonna find online...

...i wouldnt wager any cash on the legitimacy of vampires really existing else where either...

Vampires sell books, movies, merchandise, games and whatever else... why... because they are enchanting, romantic, mysterious... but just like any other product out there... they are a facade... a gimmick... a method of prying you of your cash to line the pockets of others...
 Quoting: Dr. Acula


clappa rockon
Ava Smith (OP)

User ID: 34919966
United States
02/21/2013 11:06 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
...


whose that?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


He can help you

he knows a heap about vampires
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 32538141


how do i look him up or whatever?
 Quoting: Ava Smith


He wrote a book about me...

[link to en.wikipedia.org]
 Quoting: Dr. Acula


he wrote a book about you? lmao.. okay.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 32538141
United States
02/21/2013 11:07 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
Oh my

BAN TWILIGHT shows
Ava Smith (OP)

User ID: 34919966
United States
02/21/2013 11:07 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
if anyone can help please reply on this. pleasee, i really want this.
 Quoting: vampire


Why do you want to become a vampire?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34918378


i have no meaning in life. im just simply there.
ChipModerator
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User ID: 18591269
United States
02/21/2013 11:09 PM

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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
I heard if you eat 4 lbs of your own feces you'll become a full blooded vampire.Do it op and get back to us.
Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. ~Arthur C. Clarke

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first. ~Mark Twain

He's a nut-bag! Just because the fucker's got a library card doesn't make him Yoda! ~David Mills ~ Se7en

every-citizen
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 32538141
United States
02/21/2013 11:10 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
if anyone can help please reply on this. pleasee, i really want this.
 Quoting: vampire


Why do you want to become a vampire?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 34918378


i have no meaning in life. im just simply there.
 Quoting: Ava Smith


We are all 'just here'

there is much meaning in life

you have to seek it out.

Go do some volunteer work for in a hospital

they will give you are big prospective on life and how precious it is.
Ava Smith (OP)

User ID: 34919966
United States
02/21/2013 11:13 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
I... need this.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 26244997
United States
02/21/2013 11:14 PM
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Re: im looking for vampires, real vampires, i want to be turned,
if you are taking this as a joke please dont reply.
 Quoting: Ava Smith



The bible considers a sinner dead. So I consider the walking "dead, a sinner, a zombie.



As for a vampire, I consider them the legions of darkness. So could possess a human vessel but it enslaves it. You may no longer have power over your vessel. Demons can be quite strong to those not seeking refuge in god. They can be quite powerful in human vessels actually. Tis not a good idea to seek such things.

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