joke of the day

AW, COME ON GUYS LETS HEAR A COUPLE, ITS HAPPY HOUR HERE IN SHPINCTERVILLE ,NEXT ROUND IS ON ME

What's Red .... Hard.... And bad for your teeth ?






A brick.

Little Johnny asked,"Mommy, where do babies come from?"

"Er, um," stammered Mommy, flustered, "well, when two people love each other very much, the man puts his penis in the woman's vagina. And that's where babies come from!"

"But, Mommy," little Johnny looked at her, puzzled, "When I saw you and Daddy last night, he was putting it in your mouth! Is that where babies come from?"

Mommy laughed, "Oh no, silly, that's where jewelry comes from!"

One cows says to another Cow
Quack
WTF !
Oh sorry I,m learning a foreign language

One cows says to another Cow
Quack
WTF !
Oh sorry I,m learning a foreign language

One cow said to the other cow: "Hey, you heard about that Mad Cow disease?"

THe other one replied," Who the fuck are you talking to? I'm a squirrel"

please forgive my husband, he is a lonely guy, and your his only freinds, so when he comes back from the restroom , please leave a joke or a comment. it would mean so much to him .

Q. Why did GOD give black guys such large penises?

A. Because he felt bad for what he did to their hair.

A straight guy walks up to a chick and says " I have a job"

Here is my fave joke :)


A vampire bat came flapping in from the night covered in fresh blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep.

Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it.

He told them to go away and let him get some sleep but they persisted until finally he gave in.

"OK, follow me" he said and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him.

Down through the valley they went, across a river and into a forest full of trees.

Finally he slowed down and all the other bats excitedly milled around him.

"Now, do you see that tree over there?" he asked.

"Yes, Yes, Yes!" the bats all screamed in a frenzy.

"Good" said the bat, "Because I sure as hell didn't!"

I got one!
A plane crash into the penagon in 2001!

LOL!

Lol okay

What do you get when you cross a hooker and a pygmy?
A little f#$%er about this big (holds hands about 2 feet off the ground).

A Vampires favorite animal?



Giraffe

hahahaha

How Do You Get Holy Water?























You Boil The Hell Out Of It.

What did the Momma buffalo say when her baby boy left home?

Bye son!

A piece of string walks into a bar.

The bartender says "Hey you, string! Get out of here! We don't serve string in this bar!" So the string walks outside into the alley, ties himself into a knot and frays his ends up as much as he can.

He walks back into the bar.

The bartender says "Hey! Aren't you that piece of string?"

The string replies "Nope, frayed knot!"

haha clever!!!

An atom is sitting at a bar looking all depressed, and the bartender asks what the problem is.

The atom says "I've lost an electron."

Bartender says "Wow, dude, are you sure?"

The atom says, "Yep, I'm positive."

Big badass biker sets beside a hottie at a bar and says "pardon me miss but can I smell your pussy"Hottie says "why hesvans no"Badass biker says 'Yew must be your feet yew"

What is Dr. Acula's favorite song?


"Fangs for the Memories"

A funeral director walks into a pharmacy wheeling his latest customer. He says "you got anything for this coffin?"

why do Hippos Fuck in the water....







hard to keep 1800lbs of pussy wet!

ouch

What do you call a deer with no eyes?....




























Noeyedeer <------

Keep em' coming!

5*s'.

Last Edited by Spittin'Cesium on 02/25/2013 08:33 PM