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The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)

 
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 03:33 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
What the bible says, it says. Why would the author attempt to confuse by giving different accounts of events, especially from one who's supposed to be all loving? Circular reasoning in attempting to clarify and ignoring the questions makes no sense for what is supposed to be the truth, yet this is exactly what comes from the faithful. And, with the faithful, if this doesn't work, try insults and name calling. What a strange way to demonstrate the love of God/Jesus. Anyway, truth is forthright and never attempts to confuse.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893
There isn't just 1 author.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Well now...I've always been told it was inspired by God. Would that not be the actual author if that were true?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893
Inspired is not the same as written, been through this already. Google the authors of the books of the bible. many different authors, from different cultures, different languages, over a few hundred years, with no collaboration between them.
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 03:38 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
What the bible says, it says. Why would the author attempt to confuse by giving different accounts of events, especially from one who's supposed to be all loving? Circular reasoning in attempting to clarify and ignoring the questions makes no sense for what is supposed to be the truth, yet this is exactly what comes from the faithful. And, with the faithful, if this doesn't work, try insults and name calling. What a strange way to demonstrate the love of God/Jesus. Anyway, truth is forthright and never attempts to confuse.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893
There isn't just 1 author.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Well now...I've always been told it was inspired by God. Would that not be the actual author if that were true?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893
Inspired is not the same as written, been through this already. Google the authors of the books of the bible. many different authors, from different cultures, different languages, over a few hundred years, with no collaboration between them.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Yet God was supposedly telling them exactly what to write. They were just the 'pen' right? Therefore contradictions prove the author is flawed, not his pen...

Fail.
Holy_Diver

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03/16/2013 03:38 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
then there should be only one obvious truth, one religion.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893


Truth is the Sun, and it's rays fall to the earth in infinite degrees. These rays then break up into spectrum, and individual colors and frequencies find their way to those who resonate with them.

Truth? Who can touch the Sun and live?

The Trees reach to the sky and never get close, though they lean into it and drink it's light and process it as much as they can.

Who can claim one truth on Earth when the Sun is a billion miles away?

Any truth you might find here is temporal, temporary or statistical.

The Earth is fallen, and it's Ruler is the father of lies.

The father of lies would like it if, at this time, the world embraced Atheism or anything other than Christianity.

Congrats to those who follow the father of lies.

Enjoy your rewards.
:ritd:"You've been left on your own, like a Rainbow in the Dark" -Ronnie James Dio:ritd:
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 03:39 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
What the bible says, it says. Why would the author attempt to confuse by giving different accounts of events, especially from one who's supposed to be all loving? Circular reasoning in attempting to clarify and ignoring the questions makes no sense for what is supposed to be the truth, yet this is exactly what comes from the faithful. And, with the faithful, if this doesn't work, try insults and name calling. What a strange way to demonstrate the love of God/Jesus. Anyway, truth is forthright and never attempts to confuse.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893
There isn't just 1 author.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Well now...I've always been told it was inspired by God. Would that not be the actual author if that were true?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893
Inspired is not the same as written, been through this already. Google the authors of the books of the bible. many different authors, from different cultures, different languages, over a few hundred years, with no collaboration between them.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Lol...I couldn't agree with you more.
Holy_Diver

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03/16/2013 03:41 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)

...
There isn't just 1 author.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Well now...I've always been told it was inspired by God. Would that not be the actual author if that were true?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893
Inspired is not the same as written, been through this already. Google the authors of the books of the bible. many different authors, from different cultures, different languages, over a few hundred years, with no collaboration between them.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779

Nobody cares about your ignorant qualifiers.

You're a copycat troll of OP leeching on to this thread in attempt to feed your trolly appetite with one more round of exactly the same thing we've already discussed for six pages.

YOu offer nothing new under the sun, and you are a bigger waste than OP. At LEAST OP had the tenacity to start a thread and cut-and-paste his error for all of us to see.
Yet God was supposedly telling them exactly what to write. They were just the 'pen' right? Therefore contradictions prove the author is flawed, not his pen...

Fail.

Last Edited by Last_In_Line on 03/16/2013 03:41 PM
:ritd:"You've been left on your own, like a Rainbow in the Dark" -Ronnie James Dio:ritd:
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 03:44 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
then there should be only one obvious truth, one religion.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893


Truth is the Sun, and it's rays fall to the earth in infinite degrees. These rays then break up into spectrum, and individual colors and frequencies find their way to those who resonate with them.

Truth? Who can touch the Sun and live?

The Trees reach to the sky and never get close, though they lean into it and drink it's light and process it as much as they can.

Who can claim one truth on Earth when the Sun is a billion miles away?

Any truth you might find here is temporal, temporary or statistical.

The Earth is fallen, and it's Ruler is the father of lies.

The father of lies would like it if, at this time, the world embraced Atheism or anything other than Christianity.

Congrats to those who follow the father of lies.

Enjoy your rewards.
 Quoting: Holy_Diver


We're discussing the validity of the claims of an ancient book...not about physics or the existence of God.
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 03:45 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)

...


Well now...I've always been told it was inspired by God. Would that not be the actual author if that were true?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893
Inspired is not the same as written, been through this already. Google the authors of the books of the bible. many different authors, from different cultures, different languages, over a few hundred years, with no collaboration between them.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779

Nobody cares about your ignorant qualifiers.

You're a copycat troll of OP leeching on to this thread in attempt to feed your trolly appetite with one more round of exactly the same thing we've already discussed for six pages.

YOu offer nothing new under the sun, and you are a bigger waste than OP. At LEAST OP had the tenacity to start a thread and cut-and-paste his error for all of us to see.
Yet God was supposedly telling them exactly what to write. They were just the 'pen' right? Therefore contradictions prove the author is flawed, not his pen...

Fail.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27635421


GOOD GOOD!

LET THE CHRISTIAN HATE FLOW THROUGH YOU!

FOR JESUS!

cruisecruise
pope2
cruisecruise
eyestoseeearstohear

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03/16/2013 03:50 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
HEY OP bump over here and get a little knowledge
Thread: Ex-Gautemala Bishop - Jesuits Are Spiritual Controllers Of NWO
Study Hebraic Roots
nukemasterjm
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03/16/2013 03:53 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
Crazy Canuck. Fortunately for you, The Holy Spirit will knock you off your donkey as per Act 9 vs. 4.
eyestoseeearstohear

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03/16/2013 04:02 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
Crazy Canuck. Fortunately for you, The Holy Spirit will knock you off your donkey as per Act 9 vs. 4.
 Quoting: nukemasterjm 4809461

OP will still not get it, by accusing satan of doing bad things he is alarming the people, and blaming Yeshua and calling him names makes him obviously aware of the fact he will burn in the lake, unless of course the fire is a little too hot and he decides to accept the Messiah.
Study Hebraic Roots
Holy_Diver

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03/16/2013 04:10 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
We're discussing the validity of the claims of an ancient book...not about physics or the existence of God.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893


And again, the likes of you fail to understand the concept of allegory.

facepalm2
:ritd:"You've been left on your own, like a Rainbow in the Dark" -Ronnie James Dio:ritd:
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 04:12 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
Crazy Canuck. Fortunately for you, The Holy Spirit will knock you off your donkey as per Act 9 vs. 4.
 Quoting: nukemasterjm 4809461


That's a good Christian, threaten him with eternal damnation for exposing your fraud!

norespect
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 04:16 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
...
There isn't just 1 author.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Well now...I've always been told it was inspired by God. Would that not be the actual author if that were true?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893
Inspired is not the same as written, been through this already. Google the authors of the books of the bible. many different authors, from different cultures, different languages, over a few hundred years, with no collaboration between them.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Yet God was supposedly telling them exactly what to write. They were just the 'pen' right? Therefore contradictions prove the author is flawed, not his pen...

Fail.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27635421
You make stuff up, then claim it's God who failed?
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 04:16 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
Crazy Canuck. Fortunately for you, The Holy Spirit will knock you off your donkey as per Act 9 vs. 4.
 Quoting: nukemasterjm 4809461


That's a good Christian, threaten him with eternal damnation for exposing your fraud!

norespect
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1148563
That isn't what he said retard.
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 04:19 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
Crazy Canuck. Fortunately for you, The Holy Spirit will knock you off your donkey as per Act 9 vs. 4.
 Quoting: nukemasterjm 4809461


That's a good Christian, threaten him with eternal damnation for exposing your fraud!

norespect
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1148563
That isn't what he said retard.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Curse at retards, that's a good Christian.

churchlady
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03/16/2013 04:20 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
...


Well now...I've always been told it was inspired by God. Would that not be the actual author if that were true?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893
Inspired is not the same as written, been through this already. Google the authors of the books of the bible. many different authors, from different cultures, different languages, over a few hundred years, with no collaboration between them.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Yet God was supposedly telling them exactly what to write. They were just the 'pen' right? Therefore contradictions prove the author is flawed, not his pen...

Fail.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27635421
You make stuff up, then claim it's God who failed?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Uh, if it wasn't God telling them what to write, who was it then? My guess is the magic mushrooms they were on, but whatever
Holy_Diver

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03/16/2013 04:26 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
Uh, if it wasn't God telling them what to write, who was it then?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1148563


Depends on which part of the Bible you're talking about.

The Torah was compiled from Annunaki sources in Babylon/Sumeria and Egypt, the handling of which was carried out by adpets initaited into Kabbalah, or Mystery Babylon under orders from the God called Yahweh. I use the term "God" to refer to a superior being overlording a select group of ancients whom he explains, to them, that he happened to create the entire universe...which is some extremely misleading information to say the least.
:ritd:"You've been left on your own, like a Rainbow in the Dark" -Ronnie James Dio:ritd:
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 04:29 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
Crazy Canuck. Fortunately for you, The Holy Spirit will knock you off your donkey as per Act 9 vs. 4.
 Quoting: nukemasterjm 4809461


That's a good Christian, threaten him with eternal damnation for exposing your fraud!

norespect
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1148563
That isn't what he said retard.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35368779


Curse at retards, that's a good Christian.

churchlady
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1148563
I'm sorry I cursed at the retard.
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 05:04 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
No logical defense for the infallible word of God being fallible from any of you Christians?

Just threats of hellfire if I don't believe the lies I just pointed out to you, with attacks on my character.

Are you sure you people follow the Jesus I read about in the bible?

cruise
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33398445


I've already explained it to you, and if you continue to ignore that as if I haven't, you are showing everyone that you are a deceptive troll.

If you would like to continue to embarass yourself, please continue.
 Quoting: Holy_Diver


Stop it Muff Diver, you are the embarassed one here.
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 05:07 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
I love when they get mad, attack the messenger, and offer no explanation on why the bible is so severely flawed.

Nothing but cheap attacks, really?

iamwith
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33398445


I can't wait to read where I have attacked you...
 Quoting: Life and Love


You know, all he wanted was answers. All the OP got is BS. Stop the BS. Come up with real answers!
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 05:12 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
The Tower of Babel

1Now the whole world had one language and a common speech. 2As people moved eastward,a they found a plain in Shinarb and settled there.

3They said to each other, “Come, let’s make bricks and bake them thoroughly.” They used brick instead of stone, and tar for mortar. 4Then they said, “Come, let us build ourselves a city, with a tower that reaches to the heavens, so that we may make a name for ourselves; otherwise we will be scattered over the face of the whole earth.”

5But the Lord came down to see the city and the tower the people were building. 6The Lord said, “If as one people speaking the same language they have begun to do this, then nothing they plan to do will be impossible for them. 7Come, let us go down and confuse their language so they will not understand each other.”

8So the Lord scattered them from there over all the earth, and they stopped building the city. 9That is why it was called Babelc —because there the Lord confused the language of the whole world. From there the Lord scattered them over the face of the whole earth.


Another example of god causing confusion and destruction

Some god?
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 05:15 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
What the bible says, it says. Why would the author attempt to confuse by giving different accounts of events, especially from one who's supposed to be all loving? Circular reasoning in attempting to clarify and ignoring the questions makes no sense for what is supposed to be the truth, yet this is exactly what comes from the faithful. And, with the faithful, if this doesn't work, try insults and name calling. What a strange way to demonstrate the love of God/Jesus. Anyway, truth is forthright and never attempts to confuse.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 30460893


They always do that. They have no explanation for anything other than to quote a few verses from a book that they themselves admit was 'Written by men'.

When the obvious fallacy's are pointed out, they get mad or use circular logic to defend it. What are you gonna do man? Some people are just blind.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 27635421


There are six pages of people refuting OP's claim and OP was so PWNED he's run away to his mommy.

Now here are you come-latelys here tyring to pretend like it all didn't happen.

I know this tactic, it will not work here.
 Quoting: Holy_Diver


Muff Diver, you are ill you know. Are you up on your meds?
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 05:19 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
The OP left the field because his opponents were unarmed.

He came for answers and look what he got. 7 ages of BS.
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 05:25 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
The OP left the field because his opponents were unarmed.

He came for answers and look what he got. 7 ages of BS.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 35695643
You can't fix STUPID!
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 05:28 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
If the bible is the infallible word of 'God' & God is perfect, then why are there so many mistakes in it? Is this an admission that God is not perfect?

Here's a compilation of New Testament contradictions:

Gospel Contradictions:

1) How many generations were there between Abraham to David?
Matthew 1:17 lists fourteen generations. Matthew 1:2 lists thirteen generations.

2) Is Paul lying? In Acts 20:35 Paul told people "to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, 'It is more blessed to give than to receive.'" Since Jesus never made such a biblical statement, isn’t Paul guilty of deception?

3) When did the leper become not a leper? (Matthew 8:13 & 8:14) Jesus healed the leper before visiting the house. (Mark 1:29-30 & 1:40-42) Jesus healed the leper after visiting Simon Peter’s house.

4) Who approached Jesus? (Matthew 8:5-7) The Centurion approached Jesus, beseeching help for a sick servant. (Luke 7:3 & 7:6-7) The Centurion did not approach Jesus. He sent friends and elders of the Jews.

5) Was she dead or just dying? (Matthew 9:18) He asked for help, saying his daughter was already dead. (Luke 8:41-42) Jairus approached Jesus for help, because his daughter was dying.

6) Just what did Jesus instruct them to take? (Matthew 10:10) Jesus instructed them not to take a staff, not to wear sandals. (Mark 6:8-9) Jesus instructed his disciples to wear sandals and take a staff on their journey.

7) When did John find out Jesus was the Messiah? (Matthew 11:2-3) While imprisoned. John the Baptist sent followers to Jesus to inquire if Jesus was the messiah. (Luke 7:18-22) While imprisoned. John the Baptist sent followers to Jesus to inquire if Jesus was the Messiah. (John 1 :29-34,36) John already knew Jesus was the Messiah.

8) Who made the request? (Matthew 20:20-21) Their mother requested that James and John, Zebedee’s children, should sit beside Jesus in his Kingdom. (Mark 10:35-37) James and John, Zebedee’s children, requested that they should sit beside Jesus in his Kingdom.

9) What animals were brought to Jesus? (Matthew 21:2-7) two of the disciples brought Jesus an ass and a colt from the village of Bethphage. (Mark 11:2-7) They brought him only a colt.

10) When did the fig tree hear of its doom? (Matthew 21:17-19) Jesus cursed the fig tree after purging the temple. (Mark 11:14-15 & 20) He cursed it before the purging.

11) When did the fig tree keel? (Matthew 21:9) The fig tree withered immediately. and the disciples registered surprise then and there. (Mark 11:12-14 & 20) The morning after Jesus cursed the fig tree, the disciples noticed it had withered and expressed astonishment.

12) Was John the Baptist Elias? "This is Elias which was to come." Matthew 11:14 "And they asked him, what then? Art thou Elias? And he said I am not." John l:21

13) Who was the father of Joseph? Matthew 1:16 The father of Joseph was Jacob. Luke 3 :23 The father of Joseph was Heli. Christians shall try to LIE and tell you that one is the heritage of Mary and the other Joseph. This is utter bullshit, the Hebrew and Greek cultures NEVER regarded the bloodline of the mother. They were patriarchal societies which only concerned themselves with paternal lineage.

14) How many generations were there from the Babylon captivity to Christ? Matthew 1:17 Fourteen generations, Matthew 1:12-16 Thirteen generations.

15) Egypt? Matthew 2:15, 19 & 21-23 The infant Christ was taken into Egypt. Luke 2:22 & 39 The infant Christ was NOT taken to Egypt.

16) Where did Christ preach his first sermon? Matthew 5:1-2 Christ preached his first sermon on the mount. Luke 6:17 & 20 Christ preached his first sermon in the plain.

17) Was John in Prison? John was in prison when Jesus went into Galilee. Mark 1:14 John was not in prison when Jesus went into Galilee. John 1:43 & 3:22-24

18) What was the nationality of the woman who besought Jesus? Matthew 15:22 "And behold, a woman of Canaan came out of the same coasts, and cried unto him, Have mercy on me, 0 Lord, thou son of David; my daughter is grievously vexed with a devil." Mark 7:26 "The woman was a Greek, a Syrophenician by nation, and she besought him that he would cast forth the devil out of her daughter."

19) How many blind men besought Jesus? Matthew 20:30 Two blind men. Luke 18:35-38 Only one blind man.

20) Where did the devil take Jesus first? (Matthew 4:5-8) The Devil took Jesus first to the parapet of the temple, then to a high place to view all the Kingdoms of the world. (Luke 4:5-9) The Devil took Jesus first to a high place to view the kingdoms, then to the parapet of the temple.

21) Can one pray in public? (Matthew 6:5-6) Jesus condemned public prayer. (1 Timothy 2:8) Paul encouraged public prayer.

22) If we decide to do good works, should those works be seen? Matthew 5:16 "Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works." 1 Peter 2:12 "Having your conversation honest among the Gentiles: that ... they may by your good works, which they shall behold, glorify God in the day of visitation." This contradicts: Matthew 6:1-4 "Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them…that thine alms may be in secret." Matthew 23:3-5 "Do not ye after their [Pharisees'] works ... all their works they do for to be seen of men."

23) Who did Jesus tell the Lord’s Prayer to? (Matthew 5:1, 6:9-13 & 7:28) Jesus delivered the Lord’s Prayer during the Sermon on the Mount before the multitudes. (Luke 11:1-4) He delivered it before the disciples alone, and not as part of the Sermon on the Mount.

24) When was Christ crucified? Mark 15:25 "And it was the third hour and they crucified him." John 19:14-15 "And it was the preparation of the Passover, and about the sixth hour; and he saith unto the Jews, Behold your king…Shall I crucify your king?" John 19:14-15.

25) The two thieves reviled Christ. (Matthew 27:44 & Mark 15:32) Only one of the thieves reviled Christ. Luke 23:39-40.

26) Baptism? In 1 Corinthians 1:17 ("For Christ sent me [Paul] not to baptize but to preach the gospel") Paul said Jesus was wrong when he said in Matthew 28:19 "Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them…" Clearly one of these people is wrong, either way, it’s a contradiction.

27) When did Satan enter Judas? Satan entered into Judas while at the supper. John 13:27 Satan entered Judas before the supper. Luke 23:3-4 & 7

28) How many women came to the sepulcher? John 20:1 Only one woman went, Mary Magdalene. Matthew 28:1 Mary Magdalene and the "other Mary" (Jesus’ mother) went.

29) When & who went to the sepulcher? Mark 16:2 It was sunrise when the two women went to the sepulcher. John 20:1 It was still dark (before sunrise) when Mary Magdalene went alone to the sepulcher.

30) How many angels were there? There were two angels seen by the women at the sepulcher and they were standing up. Luke 24:4 There was only one angel seen and he was sitting down. Mark 28:2-5

31) How many angels were within the sepulcher? John 20:11-12 two, Mark 16:5 one.

32) Holy Ghost timing? The Holy Ghost bestowed at Pentecost. Acts 1:5-8 & 2:1-4 The holy Ghost bestowed before Pentecost. John 20:22

33) Where did Jesus first appear to the eleven disciples? In a room in Jerusalem. Luke 24:32-37 On a mountain in Galilee. Matthew 28:15-17

34) Where did Christ ascend from? From Mount Olivet. Acts 1:9-12 From Bethany. Luke 24:50-51

35) Can all sins be forgiven? (Acts 13:39) All sins can be forgiven. Great, I’m happy to know God is so merciful, but wait (Mark 3:29) Cursing or blaspheming the Holy Spirit is unforgivable.

36) The Elijah mystery: (Malachi 4:5) Elijah must return before the final days of the world. (Matthew 11:12-14) Jesus said that John the Baptist was Elijah. (Matthew 17:12- 13) Jesus insists that Elijah has already come, and everyone understood him to mean John the Baptist. (Mark 9:13) Jesus insists that Elijah has already come. (John 1:21) John the Baptist maintained that he was not Elijah.

37) Who purchased the potter’s field? Acts 1:18 The field was purchased by Judas. John 20:1 The potter’s field was purchased by the chief priests.

38) Did Paul's attendants hear anything? Paul’s attendants heard the miraculous voice and stood speechless. Acts 9:7 Paul’s attendants did not hear the voice and were prostrate. Acts 22:9 & 26:14

39) Who bought the Sepulcher? Jacob, Josh 24:32 Abraham, Acts 7:16

40) Was it lawful for the Jews to put Christ to death? "The Jews answered him, we have a law, and by our law he ought to die." John 19:7 "The Jews therefore said unto him, It is not lawful for us to put any man to death." John 18:31

41) Has anyone ascended up to heaven? Elijah went up to heaven: "And Elijah went up by a whirlwind into heaven." 2 Kings 2:11 "No man hath ascended up to heaven but he that came down from heaven, even the son of man." John 3:13


If the Gospels are the infallible word of God, why are they so poorly written? Is God bad with details?


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 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33398445

there is NO contradiction just the foolishness of a person like you who cannot understand.
Holy_Diver

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03/16/2013 05:28 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
Nice try, ACs.

Tell your handlers your playbook is getting worn out.
:ritd:"You've been left on your own, like a Rainbow in the Dark" -Ronnie James Dio:ritd:
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 05:32 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
If the bible is the infallible word of 'God' & God is perfect, then why are there so many mistakes in it? Is this an admission that God is not perfect?

Here's a compilation of New Testament contradictions:

Gospel Contradictions:

1) How many generations were there between Abraham to David?
Matthew 1:17 lists fourteen generations. Matthew 1:2 lists thirteen generations.

2) Is Paul lying? In Acts 20:35 Paul told people "to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how he said, 'It is more blessed to give than to receive.'" Since Jesus never made such a biblical statement, isn’t Paul guilty of deception?

3) When did the leper become not a leper? (Matthew 8:13 & 8:14) Jesus healed the leper before visiting the house. (Mark 1:29-30 & 1:40-42) Jesus healed the leper after visiting Simon Peter’s house.

4) Who approached Jesus? (Matthew 8:5-7) The Centurion approached Jesus, beseeching help for a sick servant. (Luke 7:3 & 7:6-7) The Centurion did not approach Jesus. He sent friends and elders of the Jews.

5) Was she dead or just dying? (Matthew 9:18) He asked for help, saying his daughter was already dead. (Luke 8:41-42) Jairus approached Jesus for help, because his daughter was dying.

6) Just what did Jesus instruct them to take? (Matthew 10:10) Jesus instructed them not to take a staff, not to wear sandals. (Mark 6:8-9) Jesus instructed his disciples to wear sandals and take a staff on their journey.

7) When did John find out Jesus was the Messiah? (Matthew 11:2-3) While imprisoned. John the Baptist sent followers to Jesus to inquire if Jesus was the messiah. (Luke 7:18-22) While imprisoned. John the Baptist sent followers to Jesus to inquire if Jesus was the Messiah. (John 1 :29-34,36) John already knew Jesus was the Messiah.

8) Who made the request? (Matthew 20:20-21) Their mother requested that James and John, Zebedee’s children, should sit beside Jesus in his Kingdom. (Mark 10:35-37) James and John, Zebedee’s children, requested that they should sit beside Jesus in his Kingdom.

9) What animals were brought to Jesus? (Matthew 21:2-7) two of the disciples brought Jesus an ass and a colt from the village of Bethphage. (Mark 11:2-7) They brought him only a colt.

10) When did the fig tree hear of its doom? (Matthew 21:17-19) Jesus cursed the fig tree after purging the temple. (Mark 11:14-15 & 20) He cursed it before the purging.

11) When did the fig tree keel? (Matthew 21:9) The fig tree withered immediately. and the disciples registered surprise then and there. (Mark 11:12-14 & 20) The morning after Jesus cursed the fig tree, the disciples noticed it had withered and expressed astonishment.

12) Was John the Baptist Elias? "This is Elias which was to come." Matthew 11:14 "And they asked him, what then? Art thou Elias? And he said I am not." John l:21

13) Who was the father of Joseph? Matthew 1:16 The father of Joseph was Jacob. Luke 3 :23 The father of Joseph was Heli. Christians shall try to LIE and tell you that one is the heritage of Mary and the other Joseph. This is utter bullshit, the Hebrew and Greek cultures NEVER regarded the bloodline of the mother. They were patriarchal societies which only concerned themselves with paternal lineage.

14) How many generations were there from the Babylon captivity to Christ? Matthew 1:17 Fourteen generations, Matthew 1:12-16 Thirteen generations.

15) Egypt? Matthew 2:15, 19 & 21-23 The infant Christ was taken into Egypt. Luke 2:22 & 39 The infant Christ was NOT taken to Egypt.

16) Where did Christ preach his first sermon? Matthew 5:1-2 Christ preached his first sermon on the mount. Luke 6:17 & 20 Christ preached his first sermon in the plain.

17) Was John in Prison? John was in prison when Jesus went into Galilee. Mark 1:14 John was not in prison when Jesus went into Galilee. John 1:43 & 3:22-24

18) What was the nationality of the woman who besought Jesus? Matthew 15:22 "And behold, a woman of Canaan came out of the same coasts, and cried unto him, Have mercy on me, 0 Lord, thou son of David; my daughter is grievously vexed with a devil." Mark 7:26 "The woman was a Greek, a Syrophenician by nation, and she besought him that he would cast forth the devil out of her daughter."

19) How many blind men besought Jesus? Matthew 20:30 Two blind men. Luke 18:35-38 Only one blind man.

20) Where did the devil take Jesus first? (Matthew 4:5-8) The Devil took Jesus first to the parapet of the temple, then to a high place to view all the Kingdoms of the world. (Luke 4:5-9) The Devil took Jesus first to a high place to view the kingdoms, then to the parapet of the temple.

21) Can one pray in public? (Matthew 6:5-6) Jesus condemned public prayer. (1 Timothy 2:8) Paul encouraged public prayer.

22) If we decide to do good works, should those works be seen? Matthew 5:16 "Let your light so shine before men that they may see your good works." 1 Peter 2:12 "Having your conversation honest among the Gentiles: that ... they may by your good works, which they shall behold, glorify God in the day of visitation." This contradicts: Matthew 6:1-4 "Take heed that ye do not your alms before men, to be seen of them…that thine alms may be in secret." Matthew 23:3-5 "Do not ye after their [Pharisees'] works ... all their works they do for to be seen of men."

23) Who did Jesus tell the Lord’s Prayer to? (Matthew 5:1, 6:9-13 & 7:28) Jesus delivered the Lord’s Prayer during the Sermon on the Mount before the multitudes. (Luke 11:1-4) He delivered it before the disciples alone, and not as part of the Sermon on the Mount.

24) When was Christ crucified? Mark 15:25 "And it was the third hour and they crucified him." John 19:14-15 "And it was the preparation of the Passover, and about the sixth hour; and he saith unto the Jews, Behold your king…Shall I crucify your king?" John 19:14-15.

25) The two thieves reviled Christ. (Matthew 27:44 & Mark 15:32) Only one of the thieves reviled Christ. Luke 23:39-40.

26) Baptism? In 1 Corinthians 1:17 ("For Christ sent me [Paul] not to baptize but to preach the gospel") Paul said Jesus was wrong when he said in Matthew 28:19 "Go ye therefore, and teach all nations, baptizing them…" Clearly one of these people is wrong, either way, it’s a contradiction.

27) When did Satan enter Judas? Satan entered into Judas while at the supper. John 13:27 Satan entered Judas before the supper. Luke 23:3-4 & 7

28) How many women came to the sepulcher? John 20:1 Only one woman went, Mary Magdalene. Matthew 28:1 Mary Magdalene and the "other Mary" (Jesus’ mother) went.

29) When & who went to the sepulcher? Mark 16:2 It was sunrise when the two women went to the sepulcher. John 20:1 It was still dark (before sunrise) when Mary Magdalene went alone to the sepulcher.

30) How many angels were there? There were two angels seen by the women at the sepulcher and they were standing up. Luke 24:4 There was only one angel seen and he was sitting down. Mark 28:2-5

31) How many angels were within the sepulcher? John 20:11-12 two, Mark 16:5 one.

32) Holy Ghost timing? The Holy Ghost bestowed at Pentecost. Acts 1:5-8 & 2:1-4 The holy Ghost bestowed before Pentecost. John 20:22

33) Where did Jesus first appear to the eleven disciples? In a room in Jerusalem. Luke 24:32-37 On a mountain in Galilee. Matthew 28:15-17

34) Where did Christ ascend from? From Mount Olivet. Acts 1:9-12 From Bethany. Luke 24:50-51

35) Can all sins be forgiven? (Acts 13:39) All sins can be forgiven. Great, I’m happy to know God is so merciful, but wait (Mark 3:29) Cursing or blaspheming the Holy Spirit is unforgivable.

36) The Elijah mystery: (Malachi 4:5) Elijah must return before the final days of the world. (Matthew 11:12-14) Jesus said that John the Baptist was Elijah. (Matthew 17:12- 13) Jesus insists that Elijah has already come, and everyone understood him to mean John the Baptist. (Mark 9:13) Jesus insists that Elijah has already come. (John 1:21) John the Baptist maintained that he was not Elijah.

37) Who purchased the potter’s field? Acts 1:18 The field was purchased by Judas. John 20:1 The potter’s field was purchased by the chief priests.

38) Did Paul's attendants hear anything? Paul’s attendants heard the miraculous voice and stood speechless. Acts 9:7 Paul’s attendants did not hear the voice and were prostrate. Acts 22:9 & 26:14

39) Who bought the Sepulcher? Jacob, Josh 24:32 Abraham, Acts 7:16

40) Was it lawful for the Jews to put Christ to death? "The Jews answered him, we have a law, and by our law he ought to die." John 19:7 "The Jews therefore said unto him, It is not lawful for us to put any man to death." John 18:31

41) Has anyone ascended up to heaven? Elijah went up to heaven: "And Elijah went up by a whirlwind into heaven." 2 Kings 2:11 "No man hath ascended up to heaven but he that came down from heaven, even the son of man." John 3:13


If the Gospels are the infallible word of God, why are they so poorly written? Is God bad with details?


This is reproduced with fair use, none of the material on EvilBible.com is copyrighted except for pages that have a copyright notice on them, and anyone is granted permission to use and copy the non-copyrighted material as they see fit.

Learn More: [link to www.evilbible.com]
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33398445

there is NO contradiction just the foolishness of a person like you who cannot understand.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 13813766


This has been my absolute favorite response throughout this fiasco thead. The Christian will claim that 'They can't possibly understand' their stupid book when you point out its inaccuracy.

Plenty of people left your gay religion because they figured out your book was full of shit.

Of course, the Christian response is just to blame it on user-error or Satan, while they offer no real explanation for the contradiction.

Sure...Sure...

cruise
Holy_Diver

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03/16/2013 05:37 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
This has been my absolute favorite response throughout this fiasco thead. The Christian will claim that 'They can't possibly understand' their stupid book when you point out its inaccuracy.

Plenty of people left your gay religion because they figured out your book was full of shit.

Of course, the Christian response is just to blame it on user-error or Satan, while they offer no real explanation for the contradiction.

Sure...Sure...

cruise
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 1148563


Name ONE contradiction you'd like an answer to. Go ahead.

You're so sincere in your quest for knowledge, go on, pick one and hear the answer. I dare you.
:ritd:"You've been left on your own, like a Rainbow in the Dark" -Ronnie James Dio:ritd:
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 05:40 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
the kjv is not the inspired word of God.
all other versions aren't even in the ballpark but the kjv is the closest thing we have.

it is nearly impossible to translate greek into english
Anonymous Coward
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03/16/2013 05:46 PM
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Re: The bible is full of shit! (New Testament Contradiction Edition)
If the bible is the infallible word of 'God' on
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 33398445


What does that sentence above even mean?

"Infallible" "word of 'God'" ?

Be more specific and if you pick a fundamentalist definition the reply would simply be that it's not general enough to apply to most Christians.

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