Godlike Productions - Conspiracy Forum
Users Online Now: 2,577 (Who's On?)Visitors Today: 1,443,221
Pageviews Today: 2,013,876Threads Today: 471Posts Today: 9,588
03:47 PM


Rate this Thread

Absolute BS Crap Reasonable Nice Amazing
 

Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 37525114
04/06/2013 03:03 AM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Have you watched "Stand Up Guys"? My vacuum cleaner has about the right size and I can keep it hard for long enough, can it have a bad outcome?
Satan's Inner Circle

User ID: 38976923
United States
04/27/2013 07:47 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Have you watched "Stand Up Guys"? My vacuum cleaner has about the right size and I can keep it hard for long enough, can it have a bad outcome?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 37525114


It's a bad idea as a vacuum cleaner creates suction and not an actual vacuum but it might feel good if you do it maybe record and share somewhere peace
The Buddha of cool shit
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 34272879
United States
04/27/2013 08:05 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
are you kidding!?

that is a great idea!!!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 38757792
United States
04/27/2013 08:06 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
That idea, well, sucks....
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 38410717
United States
04/27/2013 08:26 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
not only does the idea suck it rules
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 37086879
Romania
04/27/2013 08:28 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
hmm...i always thought that if you put your wiener in the cleaner it will get ripped like a piece of loose skin ... try it though, and give us some feedback after the first try.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 34963435
United States
04/27/2013 08:28 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
That idea, well, sucks....
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 38757792


And blows
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 34963435
United States
04/27/2013 08:29 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
hmm...i always thought that if you put your wiener in the cleaner it will get ripped like a piece of loose skin ... try it though, and give us some feedback after the first try.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 37086879


I'm thinking it'll damage the wiener before enlarging it too, op why do you need a bigger one anyway? Just think, if you don't wear loose pants your public boner would be more noticeable if it was bigger anyway
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 22630666
United States
04/27/2013 08:30 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
it doesn't work.. er, I mean.. I've heard it doesn't work
Bluebird

User ID: 27748381
United States
04/27/2013 08:31 PM

Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Terrific idea! What could possibly go wrong!
One of the most important aspects of conspiracy theories is being able to discern when there isn't one.

Oh yeah, like you'd understand anyway.

Where are we going and why am I in this handbasket?. . .J. Handy
El_Duderino

User ID: 6508313
United Kingdom
04/27/2013 08:31 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Have you watched "Stand Up Guys"? My vacuum cleaner has about the right size and I can keep it hard for long enough, can it have a bad outcome?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 37525114


Wibble1
Luckily I'm adhering to a pretty strict, uh, drug regiment to keep my mind limber.
:Dudeism:
ToppDog

User ID: 4406691
United States
04/27/2013 08:40 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Sure, go ahead. Join the many who have tried it & have their own ER visit stories to tell. Some try it & think it works great until it suddenly sucks up a testicle by accident. Others have actually ripped their penis off. Go buy a pump. It uses a manually created vacuum seal to do the same thing, but is much safer.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 38980128
United Kingdom
04/27/2013 08:41 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
it would probably remove the outer skin of your penis.

good luck with that!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 38410717
United States
04/27/2013 08:42 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
I once developed a thing for a Hoover shop vac, she had nice hips and i used to dress her up in an old summer dress that i kept buried in the backyard for just such an occasion. The sight of her wearing that summer dress made my penis larger than life itself, after the switch was flicked there was no question what size bat the batter brought to the plate. So yeah it works but you run the risk of falling for a machine and thats just weird.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 9107938
United States
04/27/2013 08:50 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Your penis can fit inside of the hose when hard???
Astral Goat
From the deep space petting zoo...

User ID: 33435073
United States
04/27/2013 08:55 PM

Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Have you watched "Stand Up Guys"? My vacuum cleaner has about the right size and I can keep it hard for long enough, can it have a bad outcome?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 37525114


winbasement
[link to nextgenfmradio.com] All night dance party!
[link to nextgenfmradio.com] NEXTCAST Weather Reports

I don't have a "you can't do this" voice in my head. -Yanni
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 37453764
United States
04/27/2013 08:57 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
YES! I knew a nurse that said a guy came in with his urethra sucked out one night. He finally admitted to masturbating with a hoover shop vac.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 47562093
United States
03/15/2014 01:56 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
That depends on the suction. If the suction of the vacuum cleaner is moderate, all that will happen is your dick will beat against the wall of the hose, and it can feel real good and result in enlargement of your dick. Just make sure you don't stick your dick all the way up the hose. On the other hand, if the suction is great, it might suck off your dick and I would rather not chance it.
Woot Woot

User ID: 51936543
Canada
03/15/2014 02:04 PM

Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
I once developed a thing for a Hoover shop vac, she had nice hips and i used to dress her up in an old summer dress that i kept buried in the backyard for just such an occasion. The sight of her wearing that summer dress made my penis larger than life itself, after the switch was flicked there was no question what size bat the batter brought to the plate. So yeah it works but you run the risk of falling for a machine and thats just weird.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 38410717


laugh

Did those Dyson bitches get all uppity and in your face cause you weren't giving them any TLC?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 55576865
03/15/2014 02:06 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Ask Hoover

He sucked so bad he crashed the entire economy
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 53774065
United States
03/15/2014 02:11 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
If no pics , it didn't happen !
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 55509179
United Kingdom
03/15/2014 02:25 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
I once developed a thing for a Hoover shop vac, she had nice hips and i used to dress her up in an old summer dress that i kept buried in the backyard for just such an occasion. The sight of her wearing that summer dress made my penis larger than life itself, after the switch was flicked there was no question what size bat the batter brought to the plate. So yeah it works but you run the risk of falling for a machine and thats just weird.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 38410717


only thing is, once you marry it, it stops sucking, blowing, stops everything really.

moral of the story is, don't marry your Hoover.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 54897196
United States
03/15/2014 02:36 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
THE DUST MITES WILL HAVE A NEW WARM MOIST HOME!!!!!!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 47562093
United States
03/15/2014 02:40 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Absolutely not! I think it's a terrific idea! The other night I used a Bissell Cleanview Helix vacuum cleaner. I turned on the vacuum and stuck the head of my cock up the hose. The head of my cock beat against the wall of the hose, and it felt great. The next thing you know, my dick got a little bigger. Try it yourself! You'll love the results.
NODOOM

User ID: 55319512
United Kingdom
03/15/2014 02:50 PM

Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 47562093
United States
03/19/2014 08:41 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
In a word, it feels great. Try sticking your dick in a vacuum cleaner hose, and you'll know what a day is!
Isac
User ID: 47562093
United States
03/19/2014 08:49 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
If you've never stuck your dick in a vacuum cleaner hose, I can tell you from experience that it feels wonderful! Try it! You'll LOVE it.
DoomGasm

User ID: 45608136
United States
03/19/2014 08:57 PM

Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
I once developed a thing for a Hoover shop vac, she had nice hips and i used to dress her up in an old summer dress that i kept buried in the backyard for just such an occasion. The sight of her wearing that summer dress made my penis larger than life itself, after the switch was flicked there was no question what size bat the batter brought to the plate. So yeah it works but you run the risk of falling for a machine and thats just weird.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 38410717


Guy from high school, now a high profile high end real estate agent used his mom's Hoover for a blow job and ended up with a massive hernia of his penis. Pretty serious stuff and surgery. Thirty years later we still call him HOOVER and he even has it on his business card. 5afunny stuff!
Watching and Waiting
Isac
User ID: 47562093
United States
03/19/2014 09:01 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Usually what I like to do is bring up a picture of a beautiful celebrity on my computer screen and stare at her while I've got the head of my cock in the vacuum cleaner hose, and I love the results but I usually take breaks every so often so that I don't cum into the hose. If I do cum into the hose, the cum that accumulates inside the machine [no pun intended :-D] will be impossible to get out.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 55825099
United Kingdom
03/19/2014 09:03 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
I hear waste dispsal units are a better buzz
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 55340999
United States
03/19/2014 09:12 PM
Report Abusive Post
Report Copyright Violation
Re: Is it a bad idea to try using the vacuum cleaner hose for penis enlargement?
Have you watched "Stand Up Guys"? My vacuum cleaner has about the right size and I can keep it hard for long enough, can it have a bad outcome?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 37525114


Nothing good can cum from that besides,most vacuum hoses are only 1 inch diameter. Were you bragging?

News