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Stuff You Should Know: The Illuminati

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User ID: 38383355
United Kingdom
04/18/2013 12:27 PM
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Stuff You Should Know: The Illuminati
know about the Illuminati was taught to you by one Professor Dan Brown, then you are in for a treat, my friend. Because there is a lot more to this lovable group of invisible puppet masters than just secret murders and a conspiracy to set up a new world order. A lot more. For example:
1. The Bavarian Connection
Both the current Pope and the Illuminati were born in Bavaria, possibly on the same day, but probably not, because the Illuminati is 234 years old. Bavarian philosopher and professor Adam Weishaupt founded the secret club on May 1, 1776, and modeled it after the equally sneaky Freemasons. Some say the point of the Illuminati was to overthrow all the monarchies and state governments of Europe, but all those sources are also shady blogs created in 1997 and festooned with blinky dollar signs and pyramids. We’re going to go ahead and take their word for it, though.

2. The Illuminati was Wildly Popular – At First
Enlightened men all over Europe were on secret club rolls like white on rice. But they didn’t call themselves ‘Illuminati,’ they preferred ‘Perfectibilists,’ which is an even more prickish name, isn’t it? Within ten years the club claimed over 2000 members throughout Europe. But super secret white man club parties rarely last, and this one lost a ton of steam when the ruler of Bavaria banned all hush-hush clubs in 1784. Membership dwindled, Weishaupt was ousted and the Illuminati disbanded. Or did they?

3. Yeah, They Probably Did

While the Freemasonry survived the banning and continues up until the present day, the only people who really think the Illuminati are still around are wackjob conspiracy theorists. And the first conspiracy theory revolving around the Illuminati had to do with the French Revolution. This is how it went:

Revolutionaries wanted to overthrow the monarchy
Illuminati wanted to overthrow the monarchy
The Illuminati were secretly responsible for the French Revolution
As hard as it is to argue with logic so tight you could take a bath in it, the evidence is sadly lacking.

4. For Our Purposes, the Illuminati and Freemasons are the Same Thing

They’re not, obviously, but in the beginning the Illuminati drew their membership from the same pool of freethinking aristocrats as the Freemasons. And when the Freemasons kept, you know, existing, and the Illuminati totally didn’t, conspiracy theorists just kind of tagged the Illuminati as the Freemasons’ sneaky secret overlords. Or underlords. We’re not sure which.

5. Illuminati Conspiracy Theory: Short Version

Illuminati conspiracy theorists are afraid of one thing: New World Order. The idea picked up steam in the early 20th century when a British revisionist historian convinced herself and others, including Winston Churchill, that the Illuminati and Jews were mos’ def behind the French Revolution. As the century wore on and conservatives got more and more scared of Communists and atheist liberals, the idea of a sinister mastermind group orchestrating world events picked up steam. The goal of the secret group? A New World Order, duh. One government, no religion, no states. So, pretty much the real life version of John Lennon’s ‘Imagine.’

6. And Then Bush, Sr. Stepped in It
Just when Christian conservatives were getting all riled up about Satan’s minions setting up a ‘New World Order’ through the Masons, Illuminati, Jews and ACLU, George Bush, Sr. said the following:

Now, we can see a new world coming into view. A world in which there is the very real prospect of a new world order. In the words of Winston Churchill, a “world order” in which “the principles of justice and fair play … protect the weak against the strong …
EEK! And now we know why he wasn’t re-elected.

7. Everyone from the Bush Family to the Obamas Have Been Tied to the Club
Read more at [link to uk-ufo-aliens.blogspot.com] Idol1

User ID: 24816411
United States
04/18/2013 12:34 PM
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Re: Stuff You Should Know: The Illuminati
Except the real Illumaniti stands in opposistion to The Establishment. The Bavarian Illumaniti was an Establishment anti-Illumaniti psyop, as is most conspiracy literature blaming the Illumaniti for the current state of the world.

The Illumaniti is not the governments/religions of the world. These groups are TPTB, The Establishment, devoted followers of the Demiurge/Satan.

The true Illumaniti is a group which follows Lucifer/Promethius and seeks to overthrow the Demiurge.

Unfortunatly neither group is our friend, they both use us for their own purposes.

Last Edited by theorigionalzombiekiller on 04/18/2013 12:41 PM