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My Father's Death...

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 31128946
United States
05/02/2013 02:09 PM
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My Father's Death...
It's been almost seven years since my dad passed. Today, my cousin showed me a picture of him she found when cleaning out her house. My cousin's little boy who was two at the time was sitting on his lap, and pulling on his beard. That boy died of a brain tumor shortly after my dad died. Seeing the picture of the two of them together was just too much for me. I burst into tears.

I miss my dad so much. He was the best dad in the world. He never wanted anything for himself. It was always about providing for the family. He worked crazy hours, but would drop what he was doing to spend time with me. People say that you get over it, but I don't think I ever really will. I have only learned to pretend to everyone that I am.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 14207070
United States
05/02/2013 02:14 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
appreciate the time you had with him and what kind of person he was. that's all you can really do. my dad passed six years ago. he always meant well, but his demons got in the way. he was not the best dad, was selfish, let down his family, etc. despite all that i still love and miss him so i know how you feel.
M*walk
Low Earth orbit

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05/02/2013 02:15 PM

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Re: My Father's Death...
It's been almost seven years since my dad passed. Today, my cousin showed me a picture of him she found when cleaning out her house. My cousin's little boy who was two at the time was sitting on his lap, and pulling on his beard. That boy died of a brain tumor shortly after my dad died. Seeing the picture of the two of them together was just too much for me. I burst into tears.

I miss my dad so much. He was the best dad in the world. He never wanted anything for himself. It was always about providing for the family. He worked crazy hours, but would drop what he was doing to spend time with me. People say that you get over it, but I don't think I ever really will. I have only learned to pretend to everyone that I am.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31128946


You'll see him again, on the other side. I promise.
Eu não posso viver Eu não posso respirar, a menos que você faça isso comigo
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 31128946
United States
05/02/2013 02:16 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
appreciate the time you had with him and what kind of person he was. that's all you can really do. my dad passed six years ago. he always meant well, but his demons got in the way. he was not the best dad, was selfish, let down his family, etc. despite all that i still love and miss him so i know how you feel.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 14207070


I'm sorry about your dad. I know it wouldn't have mattered what my dad did. I still would have loved and missed him because he was my dad.

I guess though what's difficult is that he was so great. I'm a mother now, and he has never met my daughter. I know he would have been the world's best grandpa, but she'll never know him. It's hard for me.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 31128946
United States
05/02/2013 02:17 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
It's been almost seven years since my dad passed. Today, my cousin showed me a picture of him she found when cleaning out her house. My cousin's little boy who was two at the time was sitting on his lap, and pulling on his beard. That boy died of a brain tumor shortly after my dad died. Seeing the picture of the two of them together was just too much for me. I burst into tears.

I miss my dad so much. He was the best dad in the world. He never wanted anything for himself. It was always about providing for the family. He worked crazy hours, but would drop what he was doing to spend time with me. People say that you get over it, but I don't think I ever really will. I have only learned to pretend to everyone that I am.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31128946


You'll see him again, on the other side. I promise.
 Quoting: M*walk


Thanks. hf You sound so sure. Are you some kind of medium?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 39225011
Chile
05/02/2013 02:18 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
your father wouldnt wish you crying over him, instead living life as much as you could, enjoying and embracing his kind memory
Seeker of Truth
'Be the love that you are.'

User ID: 39171129
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05/02/2013 02:21 PM

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Re: My Father's Death...
Sorry OP. Never pretend to be someone you're not. 'Be the love that you are'. hf

God Bless and God Speed on your reunion with you and yours.
'Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.' - Dr. Seuss
'love has no opposite as it is the divine solvent that ends duality.' - m'Lord
'Be the love that you are' -m'Lord
The amount of love and good feelings you have at the end of your life is equal to the love and good feelings you create during your life.- mine
What will get you from here to there most quickly is total honesty—
being willing to assert, acknowledge, and declare exactly how you feel about a thing.
Say your truth—kindly, but fully and completely. Live your truth, gently, but totally
and consistently. Change your truth easily and quickly when your experience brings
you new clarity.-God

[link to www.youtube.com]
CrapWhisperer

User ID: 4126031
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05/02/2013 02:21 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
{{{{{hugs}}}}}

I don't think some pain ever really goes away either.. there are days it's less in the forefront but this is only a testament to how true your love for each other and why the bond remains unbroken

But maybe in people God plants a seed, and only when they've bloomed to their fullest beauty does he pick them to come home. It's your duty to still keep blooming right now. Some days will be more awful than others but try to find some peace in knowing that one day it will be your turn to meet again in that heavenly garden.
“The illusion of freedom will continue as long as it's profitable to continue the illusion. At the point where the illusion becomes too expensive to maintain, they will just take down the scenery, they will pull back the curtains, they will move the tables and chairs out of the way and you will see the brick wall at the back of the theater.” -- Frank Zappa
LiamJones

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05/02/2013 02:22 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
I lost my father just a few weeks ago. He died an unpleasant death from fast-moving cancer. Just before he died he got to meet my 18 month old baby boy who he had never met before as we live 4,000 miles away. He was holding on for that moment. Once we left he passed very quickly.

He was a wonderful father and I have nothing but happy memories of him. This has made it very easy to cope for me - there were no negatives in his life and he lived to a good age. He leaves behind children, grandchildren and even a couple of great-grandchildren. Of course I'm desperately sad that he's gone, but I pray I can live such a long, happy and productive life.
indiandave

User ID: 27213312
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05/02/2013 02:23 PM

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Re: My Father's Death...
I lost my wife over 5 years ago. I still have sad days and can still cry. I ain't easy losing a loved one. Harder if that loved one loved you back.
goodmockingbird
In the Heart of the EF 5 Tornado Belt

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05/02/2013 02:25 PM

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Re: My Father's Death...
People say that you get over it, but I don't think I ever really will. I have only learned to pretend to everyone that I am.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31128946


People who say to get over the death of a father are fools.

We integrate it, we adapt around the loss.

We remake ourselves with his memory and legacy internalised.

It's okay to miss a father, miss him intensely, even decades later.

No sense in pretending we are 'over it'. Over the shock, over the pain perhaps, but 'over' the loss? Never.

The one man who would give everything for us is gone. Gone on ahead, perhaps, but gone from this life.

We remake ourselves as best we can as a living honor to his memory.

And I think we will be in presence again.

hugs
In Memory of Tyrone Woods and Glen Doherty: American Heroes, Abandoned and Betrayed.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 31128946
United States
05/02/2013 02:28 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
I lost my father just a few weeks ago. He died an unpleasant death from fast-moving cancer. Just before he died he got to meet my 18 month old baby boy who he had never met before as we live 4,000 miles away. He was holding on for that moment. Once we left he passed very quickly.

He was a wonderful father and I have nothing but happy memories of him. This has made it very easy to cope for me - there were no negatives in his life and he lived to a good age. He leaves behind children, grandchildren and even a couple of great-grandchildren. Of course I'm desperately sad that he's gone, but I pray I can live such a long, happy and productive life.
 Quoting: LiamJones


I'm so sorry about your father. That's a blessing that he got to see your son. I'm sure he was waiting for that moment. I can't imagine living 4,000 miles away. That's probably another reason I took it so hard. We died when I was only 19, and I was still living at home going to community college. We had just reached a point in our relationship where I was an adult, and could become "friends".
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 31128946
United States
05/02/2013 02:32 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
I lost my wife over 5 years ago. I still have sad days and can still cry. I ain't easy losing a loved one. Harder if that loved one loved you back.
 Quoting: indiandave


I'm so sorry about your wife. It sounds like you loved her very much. I can't imagine losing my husband.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 31128946
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05/02/2013 02:36 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
People say that you get over it, but I don't think I ever really will. I have only learned to pretend to everyone that I am.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31128946


People who say to get over the death of a father are fools.

We integrate it, we adapt around the loss.

We remake ourselves with his memory and legacy internalised.

It's okay to miss a father, miss him intensely, even decades later.

No sense in pretending we are 'over it'. Over the shock, over the pain perhaps, but 'over' the loss? Never.

The one man who would give everything for us is gone. Gone on ahead, perhaps, but gone from this life.

We remake ourselves as best we can as a living honor to his memory.

And I think we will be in presence again.

hugs
 Quoting: goodmockingbird


You said it so well! The wound heals, but the callous is always there. There have been times I was afraid, or uncertain of what to do. I know in my heart that if he'd been here, he would have been able to fix it. He would have moved Heaven and Earth for me. I needed him, especially as young as I was when he died. This caused me to become angry and bitter for years. But, it's not just about needing him. It's about our love for each other. I miss him...his jokes, his stories, his kindness. I can't wait to see him again.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 31128946
United States
05/02/2013 02:37 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
Sorry OP. Never pretend to be someone you're not. 'Be the love that you are'. hf

God Bless and God Speed on your reunion with you and yours.
 Quoting: Seeker of Truth


Thank you. hf
PopeJean

User ID: 9557683
United States
05/02/2013 02:48 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
So sorry for your loss, OP.

I lost my dad 15 months after my mom. And not quite a year before I got pregnant with my son. It is so hard, knowing how they both would love their grandchild. I feel for you. I too believe that you will be reunited with him again, for we are all eternal beings of light, without end :)
Korats01

User ID: 39071320
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05/02/2013 02:50 PM

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Re: My Father's Death...
It's been almost seven years since my dad passed. Today, my cousin showed me a picture of him she found when cleaning out her house. My cousin's little boy who was two at the time was sitting on his lap, and pulling on his beard. That boy died of a brain tumor shortly after my dad died. Seeing the picture of the two of them together was just too much for me. I burst into tears.

I miss my dad so much. He was the best dad in the world. He never wanted anything for himself. It was always about providing for the family. He worked crazy hours, but would drop what he was doing to spend time with me. People say that you get over it, but I don't think I ever really will. I have only learned to pretend to everyone that I am.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31128946


My heart go with you OP, I lost my dad when I was 6. It's a curse and a blessing since I only have vague memory of him, so I don't miss him much but still...
russ59dd

User ID: 1230186
United States
05/02/2013 02:58 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
My Dad passed 9-9-2005. I still tell him I miss
him and love him and thank you. This is what
happens when you have a good father. As others
have said, he would want you to live your life
well and enjoy it. They don't want us to
forget about them, but too much grief may
limit them...there is something else, I am
100% sure of that, and will write again to
tell you of my experiences
OP
User ID: 1685967
United States
05/02/2013 03:10 PM
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Re: My Father's Death...
Yes I lost my Dad on Dec 13 2011 and lost my Mom on Dec 9 2012 I lost my bother on Aug 9 2003 Its been hard i love and miss them all......
AnonymousGirl

User ID: 34411972
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05/02/2013 04:57 PM

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Re: My Father's Death...
It's been almost seven years since my dad passed. Today, my cousin showed me a picture of him she found when cleaning out her house. My cousin's little boy who was two at the time was sitting on his lap, and pulling on his beard. That boy died of a brain tumor shortly after my dad died. Seeing the picture of the two of them together was just too much for me. I burst into tears.

I miss my dad so much. He was the best dad in the world. He never wanted anything for himself. It was always about providing for the family. He worked crazy hours, but would drop what he was doing to spend time with me. People say that you get over it, but I don't think I ever really will. I have only learned to pretend to everyone that I am.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 31128946


:( I'm so sorry for your pain. I can't even imagine the thought of losing my dad.
My Youtube Channel: [link to www.youtube.com (secure)]

"On the way up, we forgot to slow down. Take it easy." [link to www.youtube.com (secure)]
JUST HERE

User ID: 25610447
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05/02/2013 11:07 PM

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Re: My Father's Death...
I lost my wife over 5 years ago. I still have sad days and can still cry. I ain't easy losing a loved one. Harder if that loved one loved you back.
 Quoting: indiandave


we are in the same boat sad , lost my wife in 2008 , still cry each day

Last Edited by JUST HERE on 05/02/2013 11:08 PM
:glp sign:
Korats01

User ID: 28111028
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05/02/2013 11:13 PM

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Re: My Father's Death...
I lost my wife over 5 years ago. I still have sad days and can still cry. I ain't easy losing a loved one. Harder if that loved one loved you back.
 Quoting: indiandave


we are in the same boat sad , lost my wife in 2008 , still cry each day
 Quoting: JUST HERE




All my heart also to you
Korats01

User ID: 28111028
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05/02/2013 11:14 PM

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Re: My Father's Death...
Hehe, M*walk, I know so too but ahah your avatar picture kinda kill the moment there :) Bless ya