I have a dream; the dream of a world without time.

Come on, just give peace a chance. You guys aren't as open minded as I thought people would be here.

Eh....i tryed my uncle alex to stay here.

\/

Angels walk among you.


Comon, cross this flooded fucking street with me. I'm just trying to load up the boat from the underworld to take them back to reality.



I want to see the underground, rise up and soar.

Yes multiculturalism was a demonic idea, funded and spread by the moneychangers. I agree..have your own as a stable base to operated from, and with that anchor, you can explore the strengths and weaknesses of those unlike you. You can walk in harmony..separately in a diverse world. This is the way of of God..

Forced integration of clashing cultures is the way of the antiChrist.

Adding this as well; Wrote this one right after I finished the last one.

If you want to know what I've seen, this is a very accurately written description of my struggle as well.

From October 29; 2012

[vik-tim]
noun
1. a person who suffers from a destructive or injurious action or agency: a victim of an automobile accident.
2. a person who is deceived or cheated, as by his or her own emotions or ignorance, by the dishonesty of others, or by some impersonal agency: a victim of misplaced confidence; the victim of a swindler; a victim of an optical illusion.
3. a person or animal sacrificed or regarded as sacrificed: war victims.
4. a living creature sacrificed in religious rites.

I don't want to talk about Willy Loman anymore. Willy Loman was an annoying character. He was universal; everyone is going to be able to see their flaws in him, and be able to throw their hate at him. So what does it matter what he did or didn't do in Arthur MJiller's world when all the author wanted us to do was make us look at our own world. And for all these years, people still don't get that. So here's a little window into my reality, as of Jul 22 2012:

I don't really know where to start, if I end up thinking about it too much I'll lose the drive I had to do this; so forgive my lack of a formal opening, but I am writing to you because I feel the need to. I do almost everything I do, because I feel the need to._ So I am asking that you at the very least respect that, and hear me out.

For at least the past 5 years of my life I've felt dead. Growing up I got picked on quite a bit, maybe not as bad as some people get it; but certainly enough to make me believe that I wasn't as good as everyone else. I coped by hiding inside my head. And because of that I always struggled in school, I_ never tried to learn how to open up to people, and I never really learned determination due to my lack of confidence._ As as child my mind was my sanctuary and because of that I was never really unhappy. But as a teenager darker things started to creep into my mind as I became less ignorant of the world, (which does happen to everyone) and that sanctuary no longer provided the comfort that it once did. So I was trapped, I had no people skills, no willpower, and feeling sorry about it only made it worse. I bottled up emotions, forgot how to cry, and my life took-on a really melancholic tone. This is not an uncommon tale though, I don't expect you to pity me for having a shitty teenage experience. What came next was what really ruined me though.

….

I didn't know why I needed to when I started writing this, but now I do. Although I would like your forgiveness, I don't need it; because now that I can forgive others, I no longer need their forgiveness to forgive myself. I'm writing this though to conquer my fear of failure, my fear of being completely honest, and my fear of judgement. I'm also writing it because I care an incredible amount about family. I care a lot about ----, and I understand he's going through some really rough times right now. It took me two years of near-insanity to conquer my demons, all because I chose to do it alone by not trusting others. I don't want to see that happen to him. Since the majority of the world doesn't understand that everyone is family, blood-lines_ should be a somewhat of a sacred bastion of support; especially since we do know better._ Please, I am begging you, if you still want someone to blame for the things that happened which led to this falling out, then blame me. Because although you tried to tell me I am not an adult, and that it's not my fault, it was. It was as much my fault as anyone else'; and I'm sure some of the rotten things I've done are far worse than anything my mother could claim for herself. I can take being hated, she can't. You can hate me all you want, and I will still love you as family and treat you exactly the same.. She won't. So please, she's your sister, and this whole situation is kind of retarded.

-----

I left out the bulk of it because it's rather long and personal. And I paint a worse picture of myself this way which is appropriate for the theme I am getting at. If you read just the ending it makes me sound like I could have done some pretty bad things doesn't it? But I'll tell you that the only crime I've ever committed was selling pot so I could take the heat off someone else (and because my mastercard was maxed); I got caught because I was too honest. The only really terrible things I had done were the result of using my gift of eloquence to attack others over the internet, because I was tired of being the little guy; and that only made me feel smaller. So then what did I have to believe in, nobody liked me when I wasn't a dick, and nobody liked me when I was a dick; SOMETHING IS KINDA NOT RIGHT HERE. You kow what the problem is? I don't care anymore, well I care enough to not care about how much you care about my caring. So let me morph your mind, because I'm about to break free, and I'm sick of all your false notions of structure and nobility.

You want to grade me on how I innovate communication when I've been pushed down for SO FUCKING LONG? YOU WANT TO TRY AND CONTROL THE BEAST THAT YOUR VERY NEGLECT CREATED? That's not your job, not your say. Are you the teacher or the student? A guide or a manipulator? Man or Machine? Because I'll tell you that almost every teacher I've had has been blind to my problems. Blind to the fact that I use my imagination to create my own rhythms and rhymes, my own eloquence and flow that I'm not going to let you censor anymore. Your marking templates are completely backwards to what it means to teach, because you're just looking at the product and not the student. My last 4 hand-ins are the product of a very big picture. A very large storm that has been raging inside of me for as long as I can remember. I now understand how to control it however, and I'm not going to let anyone tell me how to do that because it needs to escape. What you should be doing is helping me because I am actually starting to believe that I'm good at this for once, and I want to use it to help people; it's so hard to get the help I need, when I've been in the dark for so long.

I've only ever once been in a romantic relationship, and that was even built on lies. After all the years of living in fear, I had someone I cared about more than anything rip my heart out. And then I became lost. My religious background was the one thing that kept me from completely losing it or killing myself; but it was also the cause for a lot of my fears and problems in the first place, handed down to me by my disgustingly narrow-minded grandmother. And when I finally seen someone look at me as if they seen something in me again, as if they actually admired me, I started to come alive. Dreams started to wind through my head, as if my hands were winding through her hair. I threw away everything I had ever doubted before, and clung onto the idea of love. I think I spun her world around when I finally told her how I felt, and now she's confused, and I'm sitting here waiting for an answer again. But this time, if she decides that I am not her romeo, I'll keep casting my ripples into eternity with hope. My delusion made me stronger, regardless of immediate fruit yield; I jumped into the sea of fire, and came out soaked in tears.

I want to be a journalist. I want to investigate the problems with the world, and tell the story for those who are too afraid to tell it. I want to tell inspiratoinal stories, not ones of destruction. I want to help others build their dreams. I really need help reaching this dream for myself though, because I fucked up my schooling pretty bad when I was too afraid to get on the bus in the morning. Please help me, I just want to strive towards a world without hate or fear.

I may sound a little crazy, but I like to think I just have a beautifully chaotic beat; I try to write in three dimensions rather than two. I've had to put on a somewhat vivid image of my own because the world made me feel like a monster, so I became a monster; kinda like batman. I get respect from troubled kids, while staying true to my roots. I have arabic, hebrew, and japanese texts tattoo'd on my arm, and a bunch of metal in my face that I'm not ready to take out, so it's going to be kind of hard for me to get a normal fulfilling career where I feel I fit in, especially since I don't know where to actually start ;(

im rambling because im tired

i just want to rest

i want the dawn to finally come

I just woke up, this happens to be when my thoughts seem to be clearest so it's probably the best time to wrap up my conclusion. When I wake it's usually when I'm sitting in the eye of the storm, when I can see things clearly, and I have the drive to get up and put these thoughts into action. That's my mind, the beast, it's this chaotic flicker of memories, so hard to control the flow of, so I just sit back and enjoy the ride until I'm finally ready to get off and look at it; and then I write about it. I very very rarely take notes, so the beast can take it's own shape, not one that I let other dreamers form. Why on earth would I let someone else try to control my demon if they can't understand the power of it? And when I get off, I have to have a very strong constant in order for me to pull myself back to reality and vent these feelings; if you've seen LOST that's what Penny meant to Desmond when she wrote to him:

Please don't give up, Des. Because
all we really need to survive is one
person who truly loves us.
(i think i could probably trust her with a few of the buttons)

I've sat in the fire all my life, being oppressed, perfected, pushed down, pushed to the breaking point for years. I just don't care anymore. When some people say that, you think that they are about to kill themselves; and you might be right so take them seriously!!! Sorry, I've already been there, I've done that by killing off the person that I was meant to be. No, I don't care anymore in the sense that I'm ready to throw out taboos, for the sake of being able to win the heart of the woman I love. I don't care about anything but love, love for the world, love for myself, love for new life, love for women. I want to re-define my world, so that she understands that I am merely a misunderstood monster, and I'll trap that monster in writing so that I never ever have the desire to lay a finger on her, or leak any of this chaos into her world; the real world; the matrix. I've had people cringe at my use of foul language before, but I'm painting a picture, and I can't do that without every word in my vocabulary. I am not yelling at you when I curse in capitals of expression to my passion, I am raging at the machines. I am not going to properly edit any of this, because it's raw emotion, and I don't want to control it this time. I can't for my own sake. It's attack and defense, to cut and to heal, I am merely swinging my sword of truth around with surgical precision.

I believe that love is the perfect balance of Disappointment And Desire.

I believe that love is the balance of man and machine.

I believe that I am a scientist of sorts

I believe that all I want to achieve is balance

The balance between man and woman, good and evil, imagination and reality, the written and the unwritten.

I want to save the world. Not for me, but for her. For my kids, for the children of those children, AND FOR EVERY OTHER FUCKING BODY LIVING IN MY DREAMWORLD.

I want to hold the product of my dreams in my arms, I want to explore every inch of her existence, and feed every one of her desires; but in a way that won't create chaos (for chaos breeds hate), but rather twist through it, in a weave of dreams; like my fingers through her long beautiful hair.

I AM THE REASON WHY CLASSICAL MUSIC STAYS SO MOTHERFUCKING GOOD

I am a survivor, and I am re-writing my destiny. Maybe I just have tourettes too.
I am a young lion king, proud, not out of arrogance, but rather out of duty to his Animal Kingdom.
I am a time traveler; a storyteller; a writer.
I am a student/dreamer/teacher.
A preacher, a poet, a practician.

I am what happens when someone truly trusts in their God, even with the bricks he leaves lying around everywhere covered with hats.

who really framed roger rabbit anyway?

This is kind of disguisting, I think I finally understand the Oedipus complex. My God fucked me up by making me feel ignored and forcing me to the sea, her God fucked her up by putting her in a bubble. Right now see, I feel like Jesus, and this girl is like the mother I never had (the perfect "virgin" Mary). And now I just want to get into her pants more than anything. But not my real mom, because that's gross and she's like the beast 0.5; or more like 0.4, it's hard to tell, my dad is pretty cool. My grandmother really sucked at her job, I'll give her a 0.0004. She is a perfect 10.

the chicken; and the Egg.

She is the image I have of perfection; that's why it's not an obsession, but rather a deep red, longing passion. This is my Opus Magnum. But only like v 1.0; I'll add some fins and spoilers later. Maybe some rocket launchers, and a flying car dock somewhere in the back. Nah fuck that, I'll just ride around on hoverboards; so I can feel my body winding through the wind...

THIS is my CONFIDENCE; my template to life; The art of communication.
When I was nineteen, I walked into the jungle. And by twenty-three, I walked out. And by God, i was rich. - Devin Johnathon Dubuque



I got the girl wrong though; she was more like Mary Magdalene

You can't force integration, but you have to respect their cultures.

Micah 4:
4 In the last days

the mountain of the Lord’s temple will be established
as the highest of the mountains;
it will be exalted above the hills,
and peoples will stream to it.

2 Many nations will come and say,

“Come, let us go up to the mountain of the Lord,
to the temple of the God of Jacob.
He will teach us his ways,
so that we may walk in his paths.”
The law will go out from Zion,
the word of the Lord from Jerusalem.
3 He will judge between many peoples
and will settle disputes for strong nations far and wide.
They will beat their swords into plowshares
and their spears into pruning hooks.
Nation will not take up sword against nation,
nor will they train for war anymore.
4 Everyone will sit under their own vine
and under their own fig tree,
and no one will make them afraid,
for the Lord Almighty has spoken.
5 All the nations may walk
in the name of their gods,
but we will walk in the name of the Lord
our God for ever and ever.

Last Edited by Johnbert.Lennonstein on 08/13/2013 04:36 PM

Don't be afraid, participate and, just give us all your trust; your soul will be saved.

for a post that actually has some substance to it, contrary to most of the garbage that you see on this website.

The virgin mary was no virgin.

That halo she's wearing is not hers to keep.



Mary Magdalene will receive the honor she rightfully deserves.

I read all your post man, I always find it interesting reading what others think!!!

Waves that flow in the oceans of the stars
Clusters bright and far
Brave souls art thou, who tread the darkness in
Thy never ending way
Say thy names with pride
Candles in the darkest night
Bringers of hope ignite
Ye of clearest sight
Go in peace, and find thy faith
Evolve thy self, and lose all hate
So a heaven you may create

Last Edited by Johnbert.Lennonstein on 08/17/2013 09:44 AM