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Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 625
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05/18/2006 01:12 AM
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Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
[link to en.wikipedia.org]

Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten

photo:
[link to upload.wikimedia.org]

Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten

From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia


"Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten" is the headline of an image created in 2002. The image is of a kitten being chased by two Domo-kun, and has the tagline "Please, think of the kittens".
[edit]

History

It was once believed that the original image (without the caption) was created by the Farker cyberblood as an oralse.cx contribution, and then modified by SomethingAwful.com user "Turkish" (who was also a Farker); however, Turkish denied involvement and posts in the SomethingAwful Forum Archives from around that time indicated it was created elsewhere and then passed around on the Internet.

The first reference to "Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten" is believed to have been from the front cover of The Gonzo, a now-defunct humor magazine at Georgetown University, in the fall of 1996. Featured on the cover was the picture of an adorable kitten, along with the tagline "Every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten...How many more must die?!"

The first image of the kitten being chased by Domo-Kun was created by Seamus Riordan, sometime between June 2000-Dec 2000. It was one of his first photoshops among many other less famous and not released Domo-kun photoshops.

The caption was added to the image by the two teenagers Blaine Higdon and Chase Huston in March of 2002, and then uploaded to Huston's private webspace. Somehow the image was discovered and passed around from there without Higdon or Huston's involvement.

The final image (with the banner) was used as a signature block on the graphic design community SomethingLeet, then was widely forwarded in email, eventually prompting Tim Tate, a blogger, to reply with a similarly edited picture featuring two kittens leaping at a cowering Domo-kun, with the caption "Every time you send that fucking picture… God kills a Domo-kun" and the tagline "Please, think of the Domo-kuns". Several spoof pictures made from it appeared, such as one reading "Every time you kill a kitten… God masturbates" or "Every time you kill God… a kitten masturbates". The original image is sufficiently widely known that "killing kittens" has become a fairly common dysphemism for masturbation in many internet communities and in geek circles.

The kitten image is stock photography and it is a tradition to use it in Photoshop contests on Internet sites like Fark.com, where it is known as "Cliché Kitty", and had been in common use there for some time before this image came into circulation.

This particular meme has spawned parodies, such as one that says "Every time you masturbate, Mack Brown loses another big game. Please, think of the Longhorns." The kitten being chased by the Domo-Kun is replaced by a Texas Longhorns running back, and the close-up of the kitten's face is replaced by a frustrated looking Texas coach Mack Brown. The parody referred to a long losing streak Brown had against top-10 teams prior to the 2005 Rose Bowl.
[edit]

External links

* Kitten images mirror
* The image
* oralse.cx, an anti-shock site (a parody of goatse.cx) which uses the original kitten image.
* The Original unedited kitten
* Tim Tate's blog the origin of the God kills a Domo-kun image.
* Cliche Kitty Blog photo blog of various iterations of the original image.
* TheGoodReverend's Cat Killing explanation An exploration of the numbers behind the kitten killing myth.
* kittenkiller.org Statistics of kittens killed
* kittenhate.com The original kitten killing stats site (obviously not work safe)
Big Daddy D
User ID: 94844
United States
05/18/2006 01:17 AM
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Re: Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
I redouble my efforts.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 94843
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05/18/2006 01:18 AM
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Re: Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
Hmmmmm, and to think that I thought God never killed anything!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 94851
Canada
05/18/2006 02:09 AM
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Re: Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
stars
2XSecretAgent

User ID: 62670
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05/18/2006 02:11 AM
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Re: Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
i have never liked cats
Let's agree to respect each others views, no matter how wrong yours may be.
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There are no stupid questions, but there are a LOT of inquisitive idiots.
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Anonymous Coward
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05/18/2006 02:12 AM
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Re: Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
Theres always more cats.
Vincent Vegas
User ID: 1583
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05/18/2006 02:12 AM
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Re: Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
that alot of dead pussy
Hardwired

User ID: 27975700
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11/24/2012 06:36 PM

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Re: Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
I am then doomed to the level of Hell with all the dead kittens. Their mewing will haunt me for eternity.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 25861717
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11/24/2012 06:39 PM
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Re: Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
Saw this thread in the related threads where that dude was condemning people to hell for masturbating today.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28147705
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11/24/2012 06:40 PM
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Re: Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
what if you're allergic to cats?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 27560918
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11/24/2012 06:47 PM
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Re: Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
I can't believe how many kittens I have killed. I estimate between 6,000 - 8,000 kittens.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 28333398
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11/24/2012 06:53 PM
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Re: Every time you masturbate… God kills a kitten
That explains why they have 9 lives! ohyeah

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