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110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!

 
Anonymous Coward
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11/16/2013 07:32 PM
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110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
I ask you, can I reason with you? Once reasoned with, will you admit the facts are just overwhelming?

This could not just come to be, but a powerful spaghetti mind sat and thought this through until its end. Showing us his ways are well and good?

Let us start with simple foods. Spaghetti.

Corn, beans, butter beans, black eye peas, green peas, snaps, green beans, turnip greens, squash, watermelon, Canola, peaches, apple, pear, orange, cucumber, pumpkin, man I could go on for hours with what I’m familiar with in just this country alone. They hold no candle to spaghetti. MMMMM delicious!

Don’t even have to go into meats or animals and the different kinds and what they do for us. Just think about the vast numbers of birds, those which are eatable and those which are colorful to the point of art. From small fish to huge whales that live in water but have to surface to breathe the air. THEY ALL LOVE SPAGHETTI!

BLAH...BLAH...BLAH...

Do you know how many different languages there are? 6,000 this list does not include slang such as north from south or east from west. And certainly doesn't include SPAGLISH! You know how they talk down in New Orleans, or up in New York, or way down south with that good ole southern charm like myself or even those out on the west coast with a flare all its own and we all know and love ghetto, a sound all its own. Let’s not forget about color and all the fuss it causes. Yep, white, red, yellow and black. Last but not least sexes, male and females with their perfect curves, MMMM CURVES!

I still can’t figure out how FSM did it making a person conceive and grow inside another person’s body and then to come out from that same great hole and then everything go back just the way it was before it ever begun. WOW, JUST WOW. And didn't need meatballs!!

BLAH...BLAH...BLAH

ALL THESE THINGS WE SEE ON A DAILY BASICS and people still have the nerve to say, THERE IS NO FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER!

I can’t get my mind around such a small mind as this? Is it because they won’t accountability? Or is it because their pride can’t take the thought of something greater than them or even a spaghetti monster? He/She/Kabaga might know what is best for us. He/She/Kababa might know a way to make me happy if I would only stop turning away. True joy from the one who made joy. There is a day coming when all things will be seen in the light of day, or night, or when ISON STRIKES YOU DEAD MOTHERFUCKERS!!!, nothing got bye him and rewards will be given that can never be taken away... LIKE FREE SPAGHETTI!!!!!!!!!

We will never grow old, or tired, or sick. Never to be fat or skinny, never hungry or sad again, just true joy for the ages. Because we'll have ALL THE SPAGHETTI IN THE ECTOPLASMICSOLARIUM aka "VERSE".

BLAH...BLAH...BLAH

Talk to your father daily…unless he's dead, then wait. The FLYING SPAGHETTI MUNSTER HEALS ALL!!!!!!!!!!
Sun is Shining

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11/16/2013 07:36 PM

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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
You have converted me. When is supper?
The woods are lovely, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.
Elsabiades..

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11/16/2013 07:38 PM

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No question about it !!! bump
Elsabiades..
Elsabiades..

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11/16/2013 07:39 PM

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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
I'm a believer !
Elsabiades..
Gerry52

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11/16/2013 07:40 PM
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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
I knew it!
I know the voices aren't real, but man do they come up with some great ideas!
Semper Fi USMC
Very much an Occams Razor kind of guy.
Bridging the gap between "It can't happen to us" and "We're all going to die".
Elsabiades..

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11/16/2013 07:41 PM

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You said it; I believe. Or, better yet; put it in a book and I'll live my life according to it ( if it benefits me ).
Elsabiades..
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11/16/2013 07:42 PM

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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
Thread: Hail The Flying Spaghetti Monster! Any other Pastafarians on GLP?

Thread: attn Pastafarians: i just named my thing "Flying Spaghetti Monster", am i in trouble?

Thread: The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is Satan's plan to lead you away from God.
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The Queen Of Mean / VENOMmennonn

*Dont fuck with me; ill jump on my menstrual cycle & run your ass over ;)
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Every closed eye is not sleeping, and every open eye is not seeing
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The universe responds NOT to what you want.....it responds to what you are being.......are you being what you want?
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the karma cafe has no menus. you get served what you deserve
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political correctness is a doctrine.... fostered by a delusional, illogical minority...... and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media; which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end.

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FREEDOM OF SPEECH:
Alan Isaacman
The People Vs Larry Flynt
"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, you've heard a lot here today and I won't try to go back over it all. But you have to go back in that room and make some decisions and there is one thing I want to make very clear to you before you do. I'm not trying to convince you that you should like what Larry Flynt does. I don't like what he does. But what I do like is... that I live in a country... where you and I can make that decision for ourselves. I like that I live in a country where I can pick up Hustler magazine... read it if I want... or throw it in the trash, if that's where I think it belongs. Or better yet I can express my opinion by not buying it. I like that right. I care about it. And you should care about it, too... because we live in a free country. We say that a lot, but sometimes we forget what that means, so listen again. We live in a free country. That is a powerful idea. That's a magnificent way to live. But there is a price for that freedom, which is that sometimes... we have to tolerate things that we don't necessarily like. So go back in that room... where you are free to think whatever you want to think... about Larry Flynt and Hustler magazine. But then ask yourselves if you want to make that decision for the rest of us... because the freedom that everyone in this room enjoys... is, in a very real way, in your hands. If we start throwing up walls against what some of us think is obscene... we may wake up one morning and realize... that walls have been thrown upin places we never expected... and we can't see anythingor... do anything. And that's not freedom. That is not freedom. So, be careful. Thank you."
VIDEO: [link to youtu.be]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Starknight

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11/16/2013 07:45 PM

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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
Funny how atheists chose spaguetti as their God. If I were one, I would have chosen pizza(. It has to fly better than spaghetti imo) but meh... To each its own. In any case, atheists have finally come out of their closet and are now openly worshipping God in their newly formed churches and stuff. Grats.

Last Edited by Starknight on 11/16/2013 07:46 PM
1 John 1–3._ 1Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits, whether they are of God; because many false prophets have gone out into the world. 2By this you know the Spirit of God: Every spirit that confesses that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is of God, 3and every spirit that does not confess that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is not of God.

@Starknight921
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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11/16/2013 07:51 PM
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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
Little known fact the FSM visited Mama Mia in her sleep and she gave birth to a Meatball named Prince Ragu.

Prince Ragu was the first Pastafarian.
Anonymous Coward
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11/16/2013 07:52 PM
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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
No, Donny, these men are nihilists, there's nothing to be afraid of.
Gerry52

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11/16/2013 07:52 PM
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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
Funny how atheists chose spaguetti as their God. If I were one, I would have chosen pizza(. It has to fly better than spaghetti imo) but meh... To each its own. In any case, atheists have finally come out of their closet and are now openly worshipping God in their newly formed churches and stuff. Grats.
 Quoting: Starknight


Pizza my man is not pasta...you are going straight to hell. And, no we aren't worshipping anyone or anything, who told you that shit. Once they begin worshipping god they are no longer an atheist. You as dumb as you look son?
I know the voices aren't real, but man do they come up with some great ideas!
Semper Fi USMC
Very much an Occams Razor kind of guy.
Bridging the gap between "It can't happen to us" and "We're all going to die".
Ðisembodied~Mind

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11/16/2013 07:53 PM

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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
Heh, heh.
“The last refuge of the insomniac is a sense of superiority to the sleeping world.”
Anonymous Coward
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11/16/2013 07:56 PM
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THE RELIGIOUS NUTS ON THIS SITE WILL NOT LIKE THIS THREAD.
PhilMasterson

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11/16/2013 07:58 PM
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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
I was camping in the woods through the Appalachian mountains once, with a group of friends, and we nearly didn't make it, the hike was so rough. 27 miles in 3 days. Steep slippery dangerous cliffs. The packs we had were heavy, and all we could think of was stoping for camp and eating our food. I for one simply wanted spicy szechwan asian noodles. I hiked all day for those noodles. That's all that kept me going.

We set up camp and began to cook our food. Everyone seemed to designate this large rock cliff edge to strain their noodles. I didn't have anything to grab the pot of noodles with, so I used my sock. I should've used two. The power of the noodles and the force of the water burnt my left hand and then all the noodles dropped off the side of this cliff. I was devastated. Never before had I felt such heartbreak. Just then I prayed for some spaghetti in replacement. I prayed for some delicious spaghetti and meatballs.

I search my backpack and find that there is a tripple portion of spaghetti and italian fresh meatballs prepared with delicious red sauce, in a gigantic bowl. It was steaming hot and I just broke down crying.

"Thank you spaghetti monster, thank you oh thank you!" I proclaimed out into the skies.

Just then I notice something in the near distance, and it was flying around with stringy stuff all over. I gave him an epic thumbs up and stuffed my face with two meatballs and a fork of spaghetti. Peace!
death is impermanent, life is the end.
Paved In Chaos

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11/16/2013 07:59 PM

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THE RELIGIOUS NUTS ON THIS SITE WILL NOT LIKE THIS THREAD.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 49996267


*yawn*
Anonymous Coward
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11/16/2013 07:59 PM
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Requesting PIN!!
Relativity

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11/16/2013 08:01 PM
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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
I ask you, can I reason with you? Once reasoned with, will you admit the facts are just overwhelming?

This could not just come to be, but a powerful spaghetti mind sat and thought this through until its end. Showing us his ways are well and good?

Let us start with simple foods. Spaghetti.

Corn, beans, butter beans, black eye peas, green peas, snaps, green beans, turnip greens, squash, watermelon, Canola, peaches, apple, pear, orange, cucumber, pumpkin, man I could go on for hours with what I’m familiar with in just this country alone. They hold no candle to spaghetti. MMMMM delicious!

Don’t even have to go into meats or animals and the different kinds and what they do for us. Just think about the vast numbers of birds, those which are eatable and those which are colorful to the point of art. From small fish to huge whales that live in water but have to surface to breathe the air. THEY ALL LOVE SPAGHETTI!

BLAH...BLAH...BLAH...

Do you know how many different languages there are? 6,000 this list does not include slang such as north from south or east from west. And certainly doesn't include SPAGLISH! You know how they talk down in New Orleans, or up in New York, or way down south with that good ole southern charm like myself or even those out on the west coast with a flare all its own and we all know and love ghetto, a sound all its own. Let’s not forget about color and all the fuss it causes. Yep, white, red, yellow and black. Last but not least sexes, male and females with their perfect curves, MMMM CURVES!

I still can’t figure out how FSM did it making a person conceive and grow inside another person’s body and then to come out from that same great hole and then everything go back just the way it was before it ever begun. WOW, JUST WOW. And didn't need meatballs!!

BLAH...BLAH...BLAH

ALL THESE THINGS WE SEE ON A DAILY BASICS and people still have the nerve to say, THERE IS NO FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER!

I can’t get my mind around such a small mind as this? Is it because they won’t accountability? Or is it because their pride can’t take the thought of something greater than them or even a spaghetti monster? He/She/Kabaga might know what is best for us. He/She/Kababa might know a way to make me happy if I would only stop turning away. True joy from the one who made joy. There is a day coming when all things will be seen in the light of day, or night, or when ISON STRIKES YOU DEAD MOTHERFUCKERS!!!, nothing got bye him and rewards will be given that can never be taken away... LIKE FREE SPAGHETTI!!!!!!!!!

We will never grow old, or tired, or sick. Never to be fat or skinny, never hungry or sad again, just true joy for the ages. Because we'll have ALL THE SPAGHETTI IN THE ECTOPLASMICSOLARIUM aka "VERSE".

BLAH...BLAH...BLAH

Talk to your father daily…unless he's dead, then wait. The FLYING SPAGHETTI MUNSTER HEALS ALL!!!!!!!!!!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 50026930


5*..I am a spaghetti convert....Whens dinner??pinni
Starknight

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Venezuela
11/16/2013 08:02 PM

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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
Funny how atheists chose spaguetti as their God. If I were one, I would have chosen pizza(. It has to fly better than spaghetti imo) but meh... To each its own. In any case, atheists have finally come out of their closet and are now openly worshipping God in their newly formed churches and stuff. Grats.
 Quoting: Starknight


Pizza my man is not pasta...you are going straight to hell. And, no we aren't worshipping anyone or anything, who told you that shit. Once they begin worshipping god they are no longer an atheist. You as dumb as you look son?
 Quoting: Gerry52


Come on dude, it's a more aerodynamic food..!

On the other hand, Atheists mega churches have been all over the news lately, where have you been?

Welcome for leaving that old, damp closet. Worshipping your spaguetti god is one step ahead. Just don't throw tomato sauce to your wife's faces.... That would be kinda ew. (At least it would be harmless, just humilliating to them)
1 John 1–3._ 1Beloved, do not believe every spirit, but test the spirits, whether they are of God; because many false prophets have gone out into the world. 2By this you know the Spirit of God: Every spirit that confesses that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is of God, 3and every spirit that does not confess that Jesus Christ has come in the flesh is not of God.

@Starknight921
Stripper Orphanage

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11/16/2013 08:03 PM
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5 *****

fascinat

orphanage
Please send my shill checks to:
2600 Scenic dr
Austin TX 78703

If I have a bill for $4.27 and give the cashier $5.02, the stunned look on their faces as they give me back $.75 (three quarters) is akin to a magic trick. How did you do that? 

You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3.

"- i liked the song before boobs were added. but now. well, boobs. they make everything better dont they? " ~ Green Girl

Credit to all uploaders whose content I steal

?
Anonymous Coward
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11/16/2013 08:04 PM
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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
The problem with the FSM argument...besides the fact that its obvious mockery...is its not a real good anaolgy.

In order for the FSM to be a comparable argument, it would have to have centuries of tradition handed down by our forefathers upon which to base its faith. just like the Abrahamic religions. It does not.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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11/16/2013 08:05 PM
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The path to salvation...

Ðisembodied~Mind

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11/16/2013 08:05 PM

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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
The problem with the FSM argument...besides the fact that its obvious mockery...is its not a real good anaolgy.

In order for the FSM to be a comparable argument, it would have to have centuries of tradition handed down by our forefathers upon which to base its faith. just like the Abrahamic religions. It does not.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 48053655


It's because those evil religions burned down libraries which contained thousands of text mentioning him.

REPENT!!!
“The last refuge of the insomniac is a sense of superiority to the sleeping world.”
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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11/16/2013 08:06 PM
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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
The problem with the FSM argument...besides the fact that its obvious mockery...is its not a real good anaolgy.

In order for the FSM to be a comparable argument, it would have to have centuries of tradition handed down by our forefathers upon which to base its faith. just like the Abrahamic religions. It does not.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 48053655


what a buzzkill.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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11/16/2013 08:09 PM
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Monarch programming or TV commercial? Or did I just repeat myself.

You decide.

Gerry52

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11/16/2013 08:13 PM
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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
The problem with the FSM argument...besides the fact that its obvious mockery...is its not a real good anaolgy.

In order for the FSM to be a comparable argument, it would have to have centuries of tradition handed down by our forefathers upon which to base its faith. just like the Abrahamic religions. It does not.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 48053655


what a buzzkill.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 50026930


Well, the Mormons recently, relatively speaking, suddenly and without warning pulled a religion out of their ass...we demand the same rights as the Mormons. Or are you anti-Mormon?
I know the voices aren't real, but man do they come up with some great ideas!
Semper Fi USMC
Very much an Occams Razor kind of guy.
Bridging the gap between "It can't happen to us" and "We're all going to die".
Anonymous Coward
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United States
11/16/2013 08:16 PM
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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
The problem with the FSM argument...besides the fact that its obvious mockery...is its not a real good anaolgy.

In order for the FSM to be a comparable argument, it would have to have centuries of tradition handed down by our forefathers upon which to base its faith. just like the Abrahamic religions. It does not.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 48053655


what a buzzkill.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 50026930


Well, the Mormons recently, relatively speaking, suddenly and without warning pulled a religion out of their ass...we demand the same rights as the Mormons. Or are you anti-Mormon?
 Quoting: Gerry52


Actually, yes. I think the Mormans are full of it. And for that very reason (among other things).

But as far as rights go, you got just as much rights as a morman or any other religion, even if yours is based on mockery as opposed to a real faith. God Bless America!

But having said that, I should also warn you...his noodly apendage cant snatch you out of hell. Only Jesus can do that.
Ðisembodied~Mind

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Colombia
11/16/2013 08:23 PM

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Re: 110% proof there is a FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER, read this and know, undeniable proof / fact!!!
The problem with the FSM argument...besides the fact that its obvious mockery...is its not a real good anaolgy.

In order for the FSM to be a comparable argument, it would have to have centuries of tradition handed down by our forefathers upon which to base its faith. just like the Abrahamic religions. It does not.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 48053655


what a buzzkill.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 50026930


Well, the Mormons recently, relatively speaking, suddenly and without warning pulled a religion out of their ass...we demand the same rights as the Mormons. Or are you anti-Mormon?
 Quoting: Gerry52


Actually, yes. I think the Mormans are full of it. And for that very reason (among other things).

But as far as rights go, you got just as much rights as a morman or any other religion, even if yours is based on mockery as opposed to a real faith. God Bless America!

But having said that, I should also warn you...his noodly apendage cant snatch you out of hell. Only Jesus can do that.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 48053655


Link? (Don't quote the bible)
“The last refuge of the insomniac is a sense of superiority to the sleeping world.”
duhhhhh!

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11/16/2013 08:34 PM
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I fucking missed the FSM. There was this great one where is was all done up in Christmas stuffs. OMG, thank you for making my day! I gotta go find a Turkey day image of him and posted it to tumblr... cuz I had no ideas for today. Thanks!!!

Well close enough....


IMAGE ( [link to i.imgur.com] )


Last Edited by duhhhhh! on 11/16/2013 08:35 PM
Awww, damn it. It was a great quote too.

Conversation NOT Confrontation
Anonymous Coward
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11/17/2013 01:05 PM
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I just had spaghetti for dinner and I can tell you without a doubt, the FSM is real and is GOD!
Ramen!
Anonymous Coward
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11/17/2013 01:09 PM
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I died on the operating table for a short period of time. I saw the spaghetti monster firsthand, but he told me it was not my time yet. I am living proof of the flying spaghetti monster.
Ikhthus

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11/17/2013 01:16 PM

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Where is the FSM?

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