When One Partner Refuses Sex

Bitch wanted a baby.. got what she wanted, no longer needs the specimen ... end of story+

First thing OP is the fact that your " son " shouldMAN THE FUCK UP .... stop getting his mother to talk to his wife for him ESPECIALLY about sex !!!!! Tell him to grow a pair and remind her that he is a man ( if he ever was ) women dont want whiny ass momma's boys ... especially if he is supposed to be the father and protector of their child . who the hell wants that ? WTF ?!?!?!?

This. The only solution is D I V O R C E. Why should she care if he leaves?

It's a bit tough giving an answer when we don't know the full circumstances of their relationship. How was their relationship before they had the baby? If it was good, then I would think she might need to have her hormones checked. She could be bottoming out after having the baby. Low in hormones can result in NO sex drive. That, and perhaps, if she gained weight, and hasn't lost it, could make her not feel too sexy. Couples therapy might not hurt, either. He should be trying to talk to her about this himself. Look up this problem on the internet, many women can have this problem after having a baby. If she is still loving towards him, but just can't bring herself to want to have sex, I would say it can be solved and worked out. If not, they have problems, and sex might not be the only problem in the relationship.

He is no Mammas boy.

She "cares for him" now, but she'll hate his guts by the time the kid's 18. Don't ask how I know. If he doesn't force her to get a job and keep her on a low budget, the courts will see her as a housewife needing alimony and someone to keep in the style she's become accustomed to.

It's hard to turn on someone and never change outside demeanor, but this is the new America, and he better man up to the divorce or be a slave for life. Many of these men suicide.

I've seen a good friend go to jail for several years for something he never did because the girl ratted him out on something SHE did. I've met many men that were abused by the "family" court system. This is serious business and I can feel this situation will go much worse before it's done.

He shouldn't take the bait of finding someone else yet. He needs to get out of the mess and keep what assets he can, while keeping her on a low allowance. He'll be demonized anyway, so he should at least walk away with what he can.

He needs good counseling from a MAN that's been there. Never a woman, who has a different perspective in her genes. And a lawyer that's dedicated to helping men only in a divorce. Check the net for men's divorce resources.

She may well claim abuse - it doesn't need to be documented if initiated by a woman. Then he's behind the 8 ball. He needs to get ahead of where she thinks she is. Again, many welfare and other agencies encourage women to call the police and accuse the guy of abuse in order to start a divorce on her terms. The abuse doesn't have to be real, but if she did hurt herself one way or another, then it makes an even more convincing case. There are so many advisors on how women can do this and men are routinely blindsided.

If he owns any guns, ammo, or similar, he should store them elsewhere. Cops finding these after a call of abuse will take them and their presence works in favor of the woman.

Just sayin'. This is very serious, and the woman doesn't even know the script she's playing to, unless she's very well informed.

She's depressed. Take the time to watch.

True that. They were wonderfully happy and have been good friends a long time before they had the baby. I need to do some research on the hormone thing. Thanks for sharing!

Divorce is ok if you dont mind someone else raising your boy and him becoming alienated and resentful from the real father.
Your weekends will not trump 5 days a week character assassination.
Sometimes there is no optimal alternative.
Dont expect to get custody unless they mother is in a penitentiary, they give custody of children to drug addicted mothers.

op is in denial.

you can't fix this.

Yup, only wifey can...you can lead a bitch to water, but you can't (legally) make her drink.

Remove yourself from their personal life. This is just weird. There are supposed to be boundaries....

shudder

This! It's important to appear poor. Lawyers for women encourage them to save every scrap of paper, bills, invoices, checks, etc. The GUY needs to pay all the bills, and the only ones from a joint account should be for joint expenses, like the house. He should process his paycheck elsewhere, and deposit only what's necessary to the joint account. Picking up a "bad" habit, like gambling, can explain where the extra money went. Even if it's obvious, it can't be refuted. He needs to stop talking to her about sex and just plan and work quietly, like a spy. Don't use the family computer for anything serious, and get a second, paygo cellphone. Never take it home - always leave it at work or at a friend's. Never use it to contact anyone that's been contacted by the regular phone, and keep it turned off most of the time. That's for divorce planning only.

This is his life, and he'll lose it for real if he doesn't pay attention. Divorce in the USA is good for women only, and it's a high dollar business. Government is fully invested into making sure women own the divorce.

Man, I thought for a second you were my wife posting, but she's just a full C!

It's necessary to emotionally abandon both the mother and kid. She's a feral woman now, and has no allegiance, and she has all the resources of society to smash the guy. Give no quarter, own the finances, let her know NOTHING. It's not a partnership at all, it's a civil war. It needs to remain appearing as a partnership for now though.

Is the mom having lingering hormonal issues? That can wreak havoc on her drive. 9 months is pushing it, so it could indicate a hormonal issue.

I have seen it happen and he has to give her some time and do not pressure her.Some women go through trauma and they lose that sexual desire whereby all attention is transferred to the child especially if it was a painful pregnancy. I feel bad for the man in this instance because he has to restrain himself from his yearnings this could be dangerous as he may go get it outside

Last Edited by Beit Yahdas on 04/18/2014 05:01 PM

Yeah. I know. You are right.

Siiiiiiiiiiiiigh. I need to step back. I have talked with both of them. It is what it is. I did my part, did what was asked, and had no answer. There is no answer to this sort of crap. I know, I went through it too 40 years ago.

Love is the binder. They have to restore that or let go of each other.

Okay. I'm done here. Thanks everybody.

also-what woman would be interested in a man who's mum not only talks to her instead of him but THEN comes onto a message board to blab about it to strangers. think the woman has her head screwed on imo.

A FATHER has an obligation to his OFFSPRING.

No question the court will make every effort for the child to become alienated from the father on his own.

I love your conclusion and you are right on

I'm an Anonymous Coward. Nobody cares or knows who I am. So no big deal.

My cousin has been married for around 15 years & they have 3 children. She gave him permission from the first child to go & find himself sex elsewhere. They have a good loving family & it all works for them. No harm no foul????

You go mom, most Americans need parental supervision.
The wives think they run the show and left to their own they will destroy it out of lack of experience and ignorance.
You are the voice of experience talking to a beginner trying the help her from not fucking up her life.

Is he a lazy mofo that doesn't help around the house and doesn't help with the baby?

Lots of women with kids are just plain worn out and tired and have no energy left at the end of the day. Try helping her out more and then see how much more appreciative she is.

Thank you!

All three of my sons can talk to me about anything under the sun. I don't hold judgments and I don't criticize .

I just hope they work this out amicably and avoid the stupid courts and all that bs. It is not necessary when two people can come to their own agreements.

Nope. Not lazy and helps with the baby just fine.

It's because he is queer.

I've heard of this before. Religious women after the baby the sex goes. Then if the guy does anything they threaten to take everything in a divorce. I've heard the opposite too, where this wife is now a mother so then guy believes sex is now immoral.

If he wants the child to remain to be his, he has to remain
in its day to day, minute by minute life or else he will turn out to be a girly boy.

Either he get his on the side or he go and start preparing for the time she bails.

Your boy and grandbaby only have so much time to use whatever fleeting leverage they have.
You can make the arrangement and not act on it, but there is only so much time to see whats wrong, Look ye to the pituitary gland as that's what controls much of the sex hormone function in humans. Pituitary masses or even a pituitary gland stroke can leave a person with no sex desire whatsoever.
The sad fact is most American women have no clue what or that they have a duty to the whole family units needs and not just their baby.
Lets be frank, if it wasn't for sex men would have no need or desire for women screwing their lives up, sex is quid pro quo and anyone that thinks they get theirs and obligations stop will not get anything else right.