Funniest thing you were hit with as a kid.

plunger
kitchen utensils



lamp to the head

cordless phone to the head

broom

not sure its funny, its scary, child abuse is not funny

She threw my leggo pump and service station at me from across the room and split my wig...because I didn't put it back in my closet after playing with it.

lilac switch.

Once my mom broke a giant round rainbow sucker over my head.

The thing shattered into a bunch of pieces.

Not cool.

One of those mini baseball bats

Glow in the dark light saber. Loud smack light sting. Lots of tears. Then ice cream.

Dad's belt. When I saw him taking it off from his trousers, I wanted to die. I think I only got hit about two times. Cant remember more.

Once I was sitting below a window in the kitchen and whining about something. Dad said to stop. I kept it up. He took off his shoe and threw it at me. I ducked, and it crashed through the kitchen window. lol Can't ever remember him getting that angry any other time.

Whatever was within reach, lol
Shoes, belts, a hose, jump rope.. The list goes on and on.
I got good at strategically running away from her while avoiding anything that could be used as a weapon.. AAhh.. fond childhood memories.

A brick....

I definitely see the wooden spoon as a weapon of choice for chucking. My mother also used the spoon as her favourite and I swear she had deadly accuracy at even 25ft. Another fav of hers was the dogs chew toy and a frisbee.

Me and my husband had the wet washcloth(s) fight with my "much younger" brothers and sister (throwing them soaked) sometimes you get the message across better with lots of laughter and some water. Then time to listen up and pay attention.

As a intelligent young girl me and my best friend didn't do a lot to get in trouble but when we did it was 1 yard stick (wooden) that would immediately snap in two. Only took 1 wack and was more scary because it broke LOL no harm done.

Stretch fucking Armstrong! That bastard hurt, would stretch him out 2 feet long for reach and velocity. He was heavy too! FUCK I still hate that stretchy bastard!

once with a flip flop, or I'd get popped in the back of the head with an open hand for running my mouth, but really that was maybe 3 times in my whole younger life, and only by my mother because she would have killed my dad if he raised a hand to me. I was a good kid

^^^ MEEEE TOOOO!!! ^^^

Thought I was the only one who got threatened with the fly swatter! LOL

Also, I can identify with the Stretch Armstrong comment. I used to hit my brother with Stretch Armstrong. That damn action figure weighed about ten lbs. it was made of the densest material in the universe. You could kill someone with it, no kidding.

Weirdest... crutch and ironing board.

Also... hairbrushes, knives, pulled hair, scratched and fists.

Perfect combination

my mom slapped me once, i laughed, and then without missing a beat she slapped me a shit-ton harder. didn't laugh the second time

I was hit by Elvira's boobs! Hot Rod show. She was signing autographs and pics. We walked straight into each other. I was swiftly tackled by security. I was 17 yrs old. I was in heaven. Total accident and I smiled for three days straight. It was a long time ago. I would still let her hit me today. True story

Priests penis.

No but seriously I was never hit on by a priest.

Can I sue someone?

A very large dildo?

When you were a kid.

Not yesterday

A sauce pan.

Nothing too funny. Just the hand, normally.

But two things my mom always said that we still joke about today are:

"Do you want me to slap you silly?"

And "Quit your crying or I'll give you something to cry about!"

A ping pong paddle that my mom had written on in really fancy calligraphy "A Gentle Reminder Is Sometimes Needed."
Gentle my ass! That thing left raised welts!

My mom hit me on the side of the head with a jelly filled doughnut. She threatened me with the angle food cake if I didn't behave.

Believe me, I straightened up that day and never did anything wrong since.

How about "Don't make me stop this car".....while swatting the air towards the backseat we all sat in unbuckled.....lol

Or "I'll wipe that smirk right of your face"

umbrella lol!!!!

I got swatted with the Green Sheet Newspaper that my mom had just picked up off the driveway.

We lived in the San Fernando Valley. It was a big thick newspaper back then.
I was mortified that she did it outside where my friends could have seen me get whacked.