A duck walked into a bar

LOL

Funny and no fifth added! Great.

A sad horse walks into a bar.

bartender says "so whats' with the long face."

Good one, lol.

A skeleton walked into a bar and ordered a beer and a mop.

A one-eared man walked into a bar and the barman offered him a drink and he said no thanks i 've got one ear.


xx

A man walks in the bar with a monkey. He sits down at the bar, orders a beer and starts watching the game on tv. The monkey jumps off his shoulder and runs down the bar and grabs an olive and eats it. He grabs some pretzels and eats them too. Then he jumps off the bar and onto the pool table, picks up the que ball and swallows it whole. The bartender runs over to the man and says, "Did you see what your monkey just did"? "He ran over there and ate an olive and some pretzels and then he jumped on the pool table and swallowed my que ball"!!

The man apologizes and offers to pay for the stuff. The bartender accepts his apology and the man and the monkey leave.

Two weeks later, the man and the monkey walk back into the bar. The man again sits down, orders a beer and starts watching the game on the tv. The monkey jumps off the man's shoulder, runs down the bar and grabs a peanut, sticks it in his ass and then eats it. The monkey then grabs a cherry, sticks it in his as and eats it too. The bartender runs over to the man and says, "He's at it again"! "This time he grabbed a peanut, stuck it right in his ass and ate it"! Then he grabbed a cherry and stuck that in his ass and ate it too"! The man apologizes again and says, "He's still eating everything he can grab, but after shitting that que ball out a couple weeks ago, he measures everything first".