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As World Burns, Bush Holds Summit With American Idol Contestants in White House

 
WTF!!!
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07/27/2006 06:39 AM
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As World Burns, Bush Holds Summit With American Idol Contestants in White House
You've just got to be kidding!!!! Not Syria, not Iran, not North Korea, Not Lebanon, not Israel....pop idols to save the world?????

As World Burns, Bush Holds Summit With American Idol Contestants in White House

Jul. 27, 2006. 05:29 AM
VINAY MENON


It's been called an historic meeting.

Tomorrow, as the world continues to spiral through miserable chaos, U.S. President George W. Bush will welcome the — wait for it — Top 10 contestants from American Idol.

Yes, before the "American Idols Live" concert series touches down in Washington, D.C., for a performance at the Verizon Center, the popular warblers will be granted a tour of the White House, one that includes face-time with the most powerful man on the planet.

Some predictions: Paris Bennett will cry; Katharine McPhee* will monopolize Bush's time (*if she shows up); Elliott Yamin will break spontaneously into a funky dance on the South Lawn; Chris Daughtry will frighten Barney the dog; Ace Young will put the moves on a staffer; and Kellie Pickler will say something remarkably stupid, possibly more than once.

Alabama's Taylor Hicks, who won the contest, will undoubtedly be asked how it feels to have earned 63 million total votes — more than Bush received in 2004.

Instead of answering, Hicks will tilt his head to one side, grin like Stevie Wonder and start playing the harmonica.

Why is the American president meeting with American Idol contestants, something that's never happened before? Two words: Susan Whitson. She's Laura Bush's press secretary and, from the Small World Department, she was also Hicks's 9th grade English teacher in Birmingham.

U.S. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice is also a declared superfan of American Idol.

Did she pull some strings to make Bush-Idol 2006 happen? Who knows. But don't be surprised if Rice takes a break from Middle East diplomacy to whoop it up with Taylor and friends.

In other Very Weird Idol News, it was announced yesterday that Canadian Idol host Ben Mulroney has been appointed — again, wait for it — a national ambassador for UNICEF Canada.

What does this mean? It means soon, very soon, we might hear something like: "Ladies and gentlemen, give it up for the kids of Malawi!" Or: "Your generous contributions will ensure that no child has to wear last year's fashions!"

Where were we?

Oh, right. Here now, 25 Things George W. Bush Might Accidentally Say During Tomorrow's Historic Summit With The Idols:

1. Nuclear or conventional — Bucky, what would you use on Iran?

2. Think about it: better border control could mean fewer rude Brits.

3. If the economy was edible, you could swallow the deficit, Mandisa!

4. Somebody sing me a little ditty that pokes fun at Hezbollah!

5. Tony Snow wasn't my first choice for press secretary. Ryan Seacrest said he was too busy.

6. Katharine, the NSA tells me you've become quite a diva!

7. Don't be scared, kids — that's just Dick Cheney.

8. Paris, you remind me of a young Condi.

9. Your success proves this great nation doesn't need Social Security!

10. I might change the law so Americans can vote more than once during federal elections.

11. Kellie, don't feel bad, only liberal elites eat calamari.

12.This one time I sang "Turning Japanese" to Koizumi — you should have seen the look on his face!

13. It's true, I cried when Chicken Little was eliminated.

14. Daughtry, you interested in becoming my Secretary of Defense?

15. No singing in the Oval Office ... just kidding!

16. I almost named Randy Jackson to the Supreme Court.

17. As I once told an aide: "Get me out of that health care session. I can't miss the Manilow theme night."

18. Quick, before the global warming strikes, who wants another glass of iced tea?

19. Make no mistake: one day there will be a North Korean Idol.

20. Heads, I give Lisa a neck rub; tails, I arm-wrestle Elliott!

21. Laura says Paula is just misunderstood.

22. In the future, you will all be older.

23. We went with a War on Terror, yes, but we also considered a War on William Hung.

24. Ace, the Republican Party needs more pretty boys like you.

25. Sometimes, late at night, I think, "What would Taylor do?"
[link to www.thestar.com]
ToadMaster

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07/27/2006 06:42 AM
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Re: As World Burns, Bush Holds Summit With American Idol Contestants in White House
bushhitler 343
:toadmaster:
Anonymous Coward
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07/27/2006 06:43 AM
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Re: As World Burns, Bush Holds Summit With American Idol Contestants in White House
He had to call a meeting to biatch at 'em for getting more votes then he did.
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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07/27/2006 06:45 AM
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Re: As World Burns, Bush Holds Summit With American Idol Contestants in White House
He had to call a meeting to biatch at 'em for getting more votes then he did.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 17264


Is that true?
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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07/27/2006 06:45 AM
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Re: As World Burns, Bush Holds Summit With American Idol Contestants in White House
lmao
Poll: World Doesn't Respect Bush
60% In CBS/NY Times Poll Say President Not Respected By Foreign Leaders

NEW YORK, July 26, 2006

(CBS) Americans generally approve of President Bush's handling of the current Mideast crisis, according to a CBS News/New York Times poll, but six in 10 say the president is not respected by foreign leaders.

The poll finds Americans are pessimistic about the prospects for Mideast peace and do not think the United States should involve itself in the fighting between Israel and Hezbollah.

More than 60 percent think the conflict will lead to a larger war in the region, and a similar number doubt Israel and the Arab states will ever be able to live in peace.
[link to www.cbsnews.com]
DanG
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07/27/2006 06:46 AM
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Re: As World Burns, Bush Holds Summit With American Idol Contestants in White House
worshipworshipbushfingsheepsheepdynamite
only a matter of time ...
Anonymous Coward (OP)
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07/27/2006 08:13 AM
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Re: As World Burns, Bush Holds Summit With American Idol Contestants in White House
bump

I've got to bump this because it's so stark raving mad!

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