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How To Cook A Fucking Steak

 
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:24 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Steak is why ameritards age so fast.Op needs a Mcdonald's pink slime human meat burger
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:27 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Are you ok OP? You appear a little upset.

Don't put salt on your steak before you cook it, it causes the meat to seal up causing it to be tough. Let it stand at room temperature, coat both sides in oil, sear the sides, cook on a griddle, then set aside, put sea salt on and let it rest.

Lots of love xxxx
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 55503104


This is how I cook a steak as well. Much better and agree you never salt anything before cooking.


.
 Quoting: Bluebird


I disagree. Have either of you ever tested this "salting before cooking makes steak tougher" old wives tale? Most tender n' tasty steak I've ever had was fucking salted before it was fucking cooked.

BTW it was cooked in a fucking FRYING PAN.

Yeah, I liked mine grilled but it doesn't change the fact the best tasting steak I've ever had was pan fried. Go figure
 Quoting: Raymantheheretic


All restuarants generously salt steaks prior to cooking.

I sprinkle with seasoning salt a couple of hours before coking, this makes a HUGE improvement.

Simply cook in a 225 degree oven until about 120 degress then sear over a very hot fire. Pepper tends to burn and turn bitterwith high heat,so pepper after cooking.
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:29 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Why do people put A1 sauce on steak? It covers up the meat flavor. Maybe if it was possum or something I could believe it.
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:30 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Are you ok OP? You appear a little upset.

Don't put salt on your steak before you cook it, it causes the meat to seal up causing it to be tough. Let it stand at room temperature, coat both sides in oil, sear the sides, cook on a griddle, then set aside, put sea salt on and let it rest.

Lots of love xxxx
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 55503104


This is how I cook a steak as well. Much better and agree you never salt anything before cooking.


.
 Quoting: Bluebird


I disagree. Have either of you ever tested this "salting before cooking makes steak tougher" old wives tale? Most tender n' tasty steak I've ever had was fucking salted before it was fucking cooked.

BTW it was cooked in a fucking FRYING PAN.

Yeah, I liked mine grilled but it doesn't change the fact the best tasting steak I've ever had was pan fried. Go figure
 Quoting: Raymantheheretic


Depends on how long you salt it before you cook it.
Meat definitely goes tougher if it is salted and left, its the way to cure most meats.
If you salt a piece of meat, any meat and leave it over night, you will see a complete change in its texture.

Seasoning it right before putting it into the pan will only bring out the flavour and not toughen the meat.

I always pan fry my steaks, as the OP said, get the pan as hot as it goes crank it right up till its smoking, just before I put the steak into the pan I season it rub a little oil on it, cook for a minute flip, cook for another minute, drop a knob of butter into the pan, obaste the steak for the last 30 seconds, with the butter, take it out let it rest then use the juices in the pan to make a beautiful peppercorn sauce.

YUUUUMMMMMM

Im fucking hungry now.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
02/05/2015 12:31 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Are you ok OP? You appear a little upset.

Don't put salt on your steak before you cook it, it causes the meat to seal up causing it to be tough. Let it stand at room temperature, coat both sides in oil, sear the sides, cook on a griddle, then set aside, put sea salt on and let it rest.

Lots of love xxxx
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 55503104


This is how I cook a steak as well. Much better and agree you never salt anything before cooking.


.
 Quoting: Bluebird


ever heard of brining?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 40929534
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02/05/2015 12:33 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Are you ok OP? You appear a little upset.

Don't put salt on your steak before you cook it, it causes the meat to seal up causing it to be tough. Let it stand at room temperature, coat both sides in oil, sear the sides, cook on a griddle, then set aside, put sea salt on and let it rest.

Lots of love xxxx
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 55503104


This is how I cook a steak as well. Much better and agree you never salt anything before cooking.


.
 Quoting: Bluebird


I disagree. Have either of you ever tested this "salting before cooking makes steak tougher" old wives tale? Most tender n' tasty steak I've ever had was fucking salted before it was fucking cooked.

BTW it was cooked in a fucking FRYING PAN.

Yeah, I liked mine grilled but it doesn't change the fact the best tasting steak I've ever had was pan fried. Go figure
 Quoting: Raymantheheretic


Depends on how long you salt it before you cook it.
Meat definitely goes tougher if it is salted and left, its the way to cure most meats.
If you salt a piece of meat, any meat and leave it over night, you will see a complete change in its texture.

Seasoning it right before putting it into the pan will only bring out the flavour and not toughen the meat.

I always pan fry my steaks, as the OP said, get the pan as hot as it goes crank it right up till its smoking, just before I put the steak into the pan I season it rub a little oil on it, cook for a minute flip, cook for another minute, drop a knob of butter into the pan, obaste the steak for the last 30 seconds, with the butter, take it out let it rest then use the juices in the pan to make a beautiful peppercorn sauce.

YUUUUMMMMMM

Im fucking hungry now.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 67738137


Wrong, dry brining roasts for 48 hours prior to slow smoking makes a huge improvement in moisture retention and taste.
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:34 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
In the winter, I usually pan sear my grass fed porter houses on a hot cast iron skillet. Pull the meat and add onions and mushrooms along with some grass fed butter. Sautée for a couple minutes then put the steak on top of the veggies. Put the cast iron skillet in a 200 degree preheated oven and use a meat thermometer until the steaks internal temp is 165.

Enjoy with a nice craft beer and some roasted red potatoes and asparagus.
Anonymous Coward
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Germany
02/05/2015 12:34 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Go to the goddamn grocery and get steak. Yes, the grocery. A little ammonia is not going to kill you, you pussy. You want to be all fancy and grass-fed and environmentally conscious, go ahead, I don’t give a shit, just get a fucking steak. Ribeye is good. And, yes, bone-in. Schmuck. Take the steak home. Get a bigass frying pan and put the shit on the stove, cranking the heat up as far as that fucker will go. Take a shitload of salt—rocksalt, you dumb motherfucker, none of that fine-grained crap here—and toss it around the bottom of the pan. When the pan is hot as all fuck—it should scorch the shit out of your finger if you’re stupid enough to touch it—put the fucking steak on there.

[link to www.theawl.com]
 Quoting: Mukk1234


hesright
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:45 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
I like my steak like I like my women. Furry on the outside and pink and juicy in the middle.

Damnit op look at what you made me do!

:picardfacepalms:
Moraniac

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02/05/2015 12:48 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
I would rather grill my fucking steak. Tastes better.
 Quoting: Beso


^^^this

Anyone that fries a steak on a stove is a big fat pussy. A real man builds a big ass fire in the backyard and cooks down some motherfucking hardwood into smouldering coals to cook a god damned steak on.
 Quoting: BRIEF


Holy shit bro, I think I'm going to die of testosterone poisoning reading that.
Winter is Coming.
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:49 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
I would rather grill my fucking steak. Tastes better.
 Quoting: Beso


^^^this

Anyone that fries a steak on a stove is a big fat pussy. A real man builds a big ass fire in the backyard and cooks down some motherfucking hardwood into smouldering coals to cook a god damned steak on.
 Quoting: BRIEF


Psh. Pussy. A REAL man cooks his big fucking steak over a big fucking fire while benching a big fucking barbell with three big fucking breasted bitches sucking his big fucking dick.

Does no one here know how to fucking cook a fucking steak?
 Quoting: The_Original_Mind


Whatever ya candy ass queer, I took my neighbor by the throat and made him build the fire and cook my steak while I fucked his wife and daughters and he watched, then I ate in front of them before I threw them home over the fence.
 Quoting: BRIEF


:bigcruise:

You win.

On a related note, I bought jerky instead of a sandwich for lunch because of this thread.
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:51 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
You grill that sucker over charcoal just long enough to sear it. A steak aint a steak unless its dripping blood.
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:51 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Steak is why ameritards age so fast.Op needs a Mcdonald's pink slime human meat burger
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 63835596


You don't know the first thing about metabolism, do you you fucktard?
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:53 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
This thread is why I moved to America.
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:54 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
I would rather grill my fucking steak. Tastes better.
 Quoting: Beso


Fuckin' A....
* Cyndexia *

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02/05/2015 12:55 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
lmao




Best Thread 2015 so Far !!!!







chuckle
.

"Sometimes the object of the Journey may not be the end, but the Journey itself".....
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 12:56 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
STFU OP. Retitle ur thread "how to make an ok steak if u don't know what the fuck ur doing"

Here it is folks.

if u don't have a charcoal grill:
1. Porter house (best)
2. Filet
3. NY strip/T-bone
4. Rib eye
5. Sirloin

Rub about a teaspoon of salt per side (less for filet)into ur thawed steak...really rub it into the meat and let sit for an hour on the counter. This helps break down the fat so ur steak won't be chewy.

take a raw onion in half and rub it onto the top rack of ur oven grate...this will clean and help ur steak from sticking

put a layer of tin foil on the rack right below that and turn ur oven on to BROIL.

season ur steaks to the way YOU like em. Minced onion, garlic, pepper, Kroger gas a great steak seasoning, or Italian seasoning...all are good for steak. Don't add more salt tho.

place ur steaks on the top rack of oven. LEAVE THE OVEN DOOR OPEN HALF WAY WHILE COOKING.

-3-4 minutes per side for rare
-4-5 for medium
-6 or more for well done

Again, STFU OP. Pan fried steaks
... HA!!...and then say it like ur some bad ass.

eyeroll2
Anonymous Coward
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Croatia
02/05/2015 12:59 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Idiot making a steak on pan or on gas. Only in Murica...


Come to Balkan to see how meat is done properly and none of your steroid filled meat with no taste.




Slap yourself
Buzzcheeze

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02/05/2015 01:01 PM

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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Got it -- NOW -- How do I make soup ?
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Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 01:03 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Lost me at "frying pan"... wtf
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 01:06 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
this post made me want to masterbate...fiercely


Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 01:07 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
Got it -- NOW -- How do I make soup ?
 Quoting: Buzzcheeze


find a vag...rub vigorously until desired consistency
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 01:07 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
No Prissy Girly Steaks for OP I take it?
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 01:07 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
I would rather grill my fucking steak. Tastes better.
 Quoting: Beso


^^^this

Anyone that fries a steak on a stove is a big fat pussy. A real man builds a big ass fire in the backyard and cooks down some motherfucking hardwood into smouldering coals to cook a god damned steak on.
 Quoting: BRIEF


Bollocks!!

A real man uses petrol.

Cover steaks in petrol, set alight, and eat while still on fire.

Anything else is a bit too girly.

Then wash down with at least one and a half bottles of whiskey.
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 01:08 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
I like my steak like I like my women. Furry on the outside and pink and juicy in the middle.

Damnit op look at what you made me do!

:picardfacepalms:
 Quoting: BioReaper


Like your women, huh? Don't you mean black on the outside and pink inside?
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 01:10 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
I like my steak like I like my women. Furry on the outside and pink and juicy in the middle.

Damnit op look at what you made me do!

:picardfacepalms:
 Quoting: BioReaper


Like your women, huh? Don't you mean black on the outside and pink inside?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 26564411


yak
Joe Camel

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02/05/2015 01:10 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
.

LOL! And I'm a vegan and enjoyed reading your "recipe"!

.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 42079795
.


How do you ask a stranger if he's a Vegan?

You don't have to ask. He'll tell you.


vegtard1
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Even if you don't take an interest in Politics,
eventually Politics is going to take an interest in you.


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Eggcellent
Re-Instate Smith-Mundt!

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02/05/2015 01:12 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
I would rather grill my fucking steak. Tastes better.
 Quoting: Beso


^^^this

Anyone that fries a steak on a stove is a big fat pussy. A real man builds a big ass fire in the backyard and cooks down some motherfucking hardwood into smouldering coals to cook a god damned steak on.
 Quoting: BRIEF




While I agree with you that NOTHING beats an inch-thick rib steak cooked over real coals, not all of us live in Texas! Some of us live where it rains 6 months of the year, while others of us are currently under 3 feet of snow.

Minus the blue language, OP's instructions are pretty much the best way to cook a steak if it must be done inside. The only things I's edit would be, no salt but sprinkle pepper in the pan while it's heating; when the pepper begins to smoke it's time to put the steak on. When you see juice beginning to show, it's time to lightly salt and then turn the steak. Peek under it after about 30 seconds and if there's a nice sear, remove the pan from the heat, put a lid on the pan, and let it set for a couple of minutes. When you put it on the plate, pour the juices back over the steak and let the dinner guest salt it for themselves.
"I have come to the conclusion that all news should be treated like 9/11, assume it is a psyop with actors participating in a staged event complete with props, until proven otherwise, in which case assume whatever is being recorded, reported, televised, is distortions/lying by omission/outright lies, until proven otherwise." - Anonymous, 4-13-12
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 01:14 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
I would rather grill my fucking steak. Tastes better.
 Quoting: Beso


^^^this

Anyone that fries a steak on a stove is a big fat pussy. A real man builds a big ass fire in the backyard and cooks down some motherfucking hardwood into smouldering coals to cook a god damned steak on.
 Quoting: BRIEF


Bollocks!!

A real man uses petrol.

Cover steaks in petrol, set alight, and eat while still on fire.

Anything else is a bit too girly.

Then wash down with at least one and a half bottles of whiskey.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 67733802


Petrol???

:fullretard1:
Anonymous Coward
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02/05/2015 01:15 PM
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Re: How To Cook A Fucking Steak
I like my steak like I like my women. Furry on the outside and pink and juicy in the middle.

Damnit op look at what you made me do!

:picardfacepalms:
 Quoting: BioReaper


Like your women, huh? Don't you mean black on the outside and pink inside?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 26564411


yak
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 67522024


LOL





GLP