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Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 67789990
United States
03/30/2015 04:57 PM
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Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
My 18 year old moved out, and in with her true love forever, unicorns flying and roses and the happiness of lala land infatuation. First boyfriend.

So anyway....she has an ATM card she often uses which is fine. Deposit paycheck from low end job in the bank and carry an ATM card instead of cash. No problem.

However, mail is coming here about her getting denied a credit card because she didn't list her SS #. That won't be hard for her to get hold of, and once she does, I figure she'll be trying for credit cards.

Mr. Wonderful is 33 and we think he is sociopathic and we also think he is the type who will run up any cards to the max, and leave her holding the bill. No way we will bail her out, and right now she says she loves us and wants to have a good parental relationship and all that sweet jazz, but she won't listen to a single word we say about this creep, she is too duped. He is very charming, but people who worked with him for 8 years told us another story.

So anyway, for her own good can we keep her from getting credit cards somehow? Can we make her a legal ward who is incompetent or something like that? If she went before a judge she'd sound normal....how does that work? Can we get some financial control by declaring her one more dumb girl duped by a charmer?

Maybe a hard lesson is what she needs......and what she'll probably get...but I'd love to prevent credit cards if we could.

Any legal advice appreciated.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 66858594
United States
03/30/2015 05:00 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
Quit being so over protective and let her grow up and figure out life. You will just make it worse.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 60624052
United States
03/30/2015 05:00 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
My 18 year old moved out, and in with her true love forever, unicorns flying and roses and the happiness of lala land infatuation. First boyfriend.

So anyway....she has an ATM card she often uses which is fine. Deposit paycheck from low end job in the bank and carry an ATM card instead of cash. No problem.

However, mail is coming here about her getting denied a credit card because she didn't list her SS #. That won't be hard for her to get hold of, and once she does, I figure she'll be trying for credit cards.

Mr. Wonderful is 33 and we think he is sociopathic and we also think he is the type who will run up any cards to the max, and leave her holding the bill. No way we will bail her out, and right now she says she loves us and wants to have a good parental relationship and all that sweet jazz, but she won't listen to a single word we say about this creep, she is too duped. He is very charming, but people who worked with him for 8 years told us another story.

So anyway, for her own good can we keep her from getting credit cards somehow? Can we make her a legal ward who is incompetent or something like that? If she went before a judge she'd sound normal....how does that work? Can we get some financial control by declaring her one more dumb girl duped by a charmer?

Maybe a hard lesson is what she needs......and what she'll probably get...but I'd love to prevent credit cards if we could.

Any legal advice appreciated.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 67789990


Unfortunantly in the United States adults have this pesky little thing called freedom.

The only thing you could do is convince her otherwise, or hire a hooker to fuck him, record it and show it to her. Either works.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 60624052
United States
03/30/2015 05:01 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
Also I'm guessing your from Minnesota. Shit like this is popular there. Let the girl live her own life, shes an adult now.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68755059
Belgium
03/30/2015 05:01 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
nope she is an adult you can't do anything.

i know its hard but she must make her own mistakes then she will realize it...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68748556
United States
03/30/2015 05:09 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
It's too late to raise her now. You had 18 years, what were you doing?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 38297111
United States
03/30/2015 05:11 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
She will have to learn the hard way, by making mistakes - just like most young adults when it comes to credit, and love for that matter.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 1843201
United States
03/30/2015 05:15 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
My 18 year old moved out, and in with her true love forever, unicorns flying and roses and the happiness of lala land infatuation. First boyfriend.

So anyway....she has an ATM card she often uses which is fine. Deposit paycheck from low end job in the bank and carry an ATM card instead of cash. No problem.

However, mail is coming here about her getting denied a credit card because she didn't list her SS #. That won't be hard for her to get hold of, and once she does, I figure she'll be trying for credit cards.

Mr. Wonderful is 33 and we think he is sociopathic and we also think he is the type who will run up any cards to the max, and leave her holding the bill. No way we will bail her out, and right now she says she loves us and wants to have a good parental relationship and all that sweet jazz, but she won't listen to a single word we say about this creep, she is too duped. He is very charming, but people who worked with him for 8 years told us another story.

So anyway, for her own good can we keep her from getting credit cards somehow? Can we make her a legal ward who is incompetent or something like that? If she went before a judge she'd sound normal....how does that work? Can we get some financial control by declaring her one more dumb girl duped by a charmer?

Maybe a hard lesson is what she needs......and what she'll probably get...but I'd love to prevent credit cards if we could.

Any legal advice appreciated.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 67789990

this is where every parent get to see how well they did . Good luck
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68650255
Netherlands
03/30/2015 05:15 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
My 18 year old moved out, and in with her true love forever, unicorns flying and roses and the happiness of lala land infatuation. First boyfriend.

So anyway....she has an ATM card she often uses which is fine. Deposit paycheck from low end job in the bank and carry an ATM card instead of cash. No problem.

However, mail is coming here about her getting denied a credit card because she didn't list her SS #. That won't be hard for her to get hold of, and once she does, I figure she'll be trying for credit cards.

Mr. Wonderful is 33 and we think he is sociopathic and we also think he is the type who will run up any cards to the max, and leave her holding the bill. No way we will bail her out, and right now she says she loves us and wants to have a good parental relationship and all that sweet jazz, but she won't listen to a single word we say about this creep, she is too duped. He is very charming, but people who worked with him for 8 years told us another story.

So anyway, for her own good can we keep her from getting credit cards somehow? Can we make her a legal ward who is incompetent or something like that? If she went before a judge she'd sound normal....how does that work? Can we get some financial control by declaring her one more dumb girl duped by a charmer?

Maybe a hard lesson is what she needs......and what she'll probably get...but I'd love to prevent credit cards if we could.

Any legal advice appreciated.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 67789990


Yournonly choice isvto lend her money yourselves if it bothers you so much...
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 60583524
United States
03/30/2015 05:18 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
If she has no credit history she will have difficulty getting a dangerously high limit unsecured card. She might get herself on the hook for a grand, but that's still manageable.

Have a heart to heart with her, and explain your fears to her. She won't listen of course, but she will remember your talk after he does hang her for the bills.

maybe find some tacky court shows episodes were people are suing people in similar situations and get her to see how often this happens.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68748556
United States
03/30/2015 05:29 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
She is 18 and doesn't know her own S S N ? My daughter has been pinching penny's since she Was 8 yrs old. Saving for car, college, apartment. I let her handle her own money, she is 15 now and knows how to save and budget.. I hope you gave her good lessons in financial responsibility when she was young. If so, maybe she can handle the credit cards?

It seems a bit like Monday morning quarter backing wanting to take Her to court for incompetence and a little controlling.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 60624052
United States
03/30/2015 05:30 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
She is 18 and doesn't know her own S S N ? My daughter has been pinching penny's since she Was 8 yrs old. Saving for car, college, apartment. I let her handle her own money, she is 15 now and knows how to save and budget.. I hope you gave her good lessons in financial responsibility when she was young. If so, maybe she can handle the credit cards?

It seems a bit like Monday morning quarter backing wanting to take Her to court for incompetence and a little controlling.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 68748556


She probably doesn't know her SSN because her parents never gave her the SS card.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 38593227
Canada
03/30/2015 05:33 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
you've kept her sheltered and entitled for too long.

let her fly, when she falls, and she WILL fall, be the loving parent you should be and help her out.

Or keep trying to over reach and keep her in a cage, good luck with that..
beeches

User ID: 28167778
United States
03/30/2015 05:35 PM

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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
Quit being so over protective and let her grow up and figure out life. You will just make it worse.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 66858594


hardly being overprotective, it is probable she will turn to her parents for money and a place to live in the relatively near future.
Liberalism is totalitarianism with a human face – Thomas Sowell
beeches

User ID: 28167778
United States
03/30/2015 05:36 PM

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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
protect your own assets mom, financially ( of course no co-signing of anything)

and if he really is rotten, your data.
Liberalism is totalitarianism with a human face – Thomas Sowell
Anonymous Coward (OP)
User ID: 67789990
United States
03/30/2015 05:37 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
Thanks for the imput.

She was responsible and frugal and wrote out a budget and was doing very well. She took consumer math last year and learned all this stuff. She had to do chores to earn money for years to buy her own clothes and was pretty smart if you ask me. After she got her job she was saving for a car.

The power a man can have over a girl, with the most glowing of written love letters and assurances of how beautiful she is to him, and everlasting love and marriage, is kind of stunning to watch. It is like the girl is hypnotized and under a spell.

His last three girlfriends dumped him.......praying mine wakes up quick.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68045806
United States
03/30/2015 05:47 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
This is kinda shady, but you could always call up the bank and say you are her and ask to have her credit monitored. That way if the boyfriend tries something really shady at least your daughter can be notified.

Other than declaring her incompetent and taking over her life there really isn't a thing you can do.

And why post this on GLP of all places? lol it's like you're asking to be trolled!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 60624052
United States
03/30/2015 05:48 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
This is kinda shady, but you could always call up the bank and say you are her and ask to have her credit monitored. That way if the boyfriend tries something really shady at least your daughter can be notified.

Other than declaring her incompetent and taking over her life there really isn't a thing you can do.

And why post this on GLP of all places? lol it's like you're asking to be trolled!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 68045806


You shouldn't encourage identity theft, but credit monitoring would be a good idea to suggest to their daughter.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 49530664
United States
03/30/2015 05:50 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
Haha your controlling grasps are gone she is 18!

Not a damn thing you can do!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 52269107
United States
03/30/2015 06:01 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
I'm sorry you are in this position, but I can't think of any good reason you'd want to damage her credit.

As to fact that your daughter is only 18, it depends on where you live as to whether you have any say in her contracts. Alabama, Nebraska and Pennsylvania don't consider her to have reached maturity yet.

If you don't live in those states, she's old enough to enter into contracts.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68768479
Austria
03/30/2015 06:02 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
You seem to assume she will fail to manage her credit yet you paint her as a bright individual.. give her her wings and watch- she'll either surprise you pleasantly or learn a (relatively) cheap lesson on two fronts, 'love' and finances, that will stay wit her for a lifetime.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 15879545
United States
03/30/2015 06:05 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
hey helicopter mom...at what age are your children going to be free to make their own decisions and learn from their own mistakes, without you micromanaging and 'fixing' everything for them?

are you still going to be nosing into your childs finances and relationships when she is 30?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 64966824
United States
03/30/2015 06:09 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
Figure out a way to stop it.... Keep at it. Go over to her place and look around. Do whatever you gotta do...

Doing business with banks now a days is a jail sentence.
me
User ID: 46708429
United States
03/30/2015 06:09 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
no ..... but u can protect urself from incurring her debt ...... take out an ad in the personals of ur news paper .... state that from that date on ur not responsible for any of her debt ...... its legal .....
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 43407265
United States
03/30/2015 06:09 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
Run a background check on the old dude!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 59394037
United States
03/30/2015 06:10 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
Is she hot?
She could probably become a stripper and pay it off easily every month

I have two friends who do that and it only helps them build credit and pay for college in the future. I think one has a $5000 limit from Discover with cash back bonus and she spends THE WHOLE thing each month!

Livin the dream
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 68708815
United States
03/30/2015 06:14 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
show her about the FICO score and how it is calculated - tell her she will need it to be high so she can get a mortgage
Paggs

User ID: 62838504
United States
03/30/2015 06:18 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
My 18 year old moved out, and in with her true love forever, unicorns flying and roses and the happiness of lala land infatuation. First boyfriend.

So anyway....she has an ATM card she often uses which is fine. Deposit paycheck from low end job in the bank and carry an ATM card instead of cash. No problem.

However, mail is coming here about her getting denied a credit card because she didn't list her SS #. That won't be hard for her to get hold of, and once she does, I figure she'll be trying for credit cards.

Mr. Wonderful is 33 and we think he is sociopathic and we also think he is the type who will run up any cards to the max, and leave her holding the bill. No way we will bail her out, and right now she says she loves us and wants to have a good parental relationship and all that sweet jazz, but she won't listen to a single word we say about this creep, she is too duped. He is very charming, but people who worked with him for 8 years told us another story.

So anyway, for her own good can we keep her from getting credit cards somehow? Can we make her a legal ward who is incompetent or something like that? If she went before a judge she'd sound normal....how does that work? Can we get some financial control by declaring her one more dumb girl duped by a charmer?

Maybe a hard lesson is what she needs......and what she'll probably get...but I'd love to prevent credit cards if we could.

Any legal advice appreciated.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 67789990



Stop being a over protective parent and let her make her own decisions.

Life is best learned the hard way!
JaxP

User ID: 62322309
United States
03/30/2015 06:33 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
My 18 year old moved out, and in with her true love forever, unicorns flying and roses and the happiness of lala land infatuation. First boyfriend.

So anyway....she has an ATM card she often uses which is fine. Deposit paycheck from low end job in the bank and carry an ATM card instead of cash. No problem.

However, mail is coming here about her getting denied a credit card because she didn't list her SS #. That won't be hard for her to get hold of, and once she does, I figure she'll be trying for credit cards.

Mr. Wonderful is 33 and we think he is sociopathic and we also think he is the type who will run up any cards to the max, and leave her holding the bill. No way we will bail her out, and right now she says she loves us and wants to have a good parental relationship and all that sweet jazz, but she won't listen to a single word we say about this creep, she is too duped. He is very charming, but people who worked with him for 8 years told us another story.

So anyway, for her own good can we keep her from getting credit cards somehow? Can we make her a legal ward who is incompetent or something like that? If she went before a judge she'd sound normal....how does that work? Can we get some financial control by declaring her one more dumb girl duped by a charmer?

Maybe a hard lesson is what she needs......and what she'll probably get...but I'd love to prevent credit cards if we could.

Any legal advice appreciated.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 67789990


I gotta say it's a lesson that she will have to learn the hard way. Unless she really is incompetent there really isn't anything you can do, except to not bail her out when she gets in over her head.

I had a very similar situation with my daughter when she was 19. She is 26 now and is just digging herself out from under the credit nightmare he helped her into. The guy was a nut and older and married. We tried to warn her about him, and she became very aggressive with us. She co-signed a car for him, let him use her credit cards, the whole 9 yards.

At the time we lived in Germany, we are a military family and he was enlisted. We even tried to have our own daughter deported, just to get her away from him. We tried to have him arrested, because adultery is illegal in the military. We tried everything within the legal limits to keep them apart. She stayed with him for two years.

A little advice, and my point of airing my dirty laundry...I had decided to pretend that I was over it and welcome him into our family. It was the most disgusting thing I have ever done. I really outdid myself. It was only a few months later that they broke up.

She did later apologize to me for everything that she had done, and even told me that I was right about him from the start. But she felt like she had to prove me wrong about him.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 56215584
United States
03/30/2015 06:45 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
Hey OP how did she get a job without giving them her SS#???
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 60624052
United States
03/30/2015 06:49 PM
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Re: Help........is there a legal way to prevent your 18 year old from getting a credit card?
Hey OP how did she get a job without giving them her SS#???
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 56215584


Maybe they thought she was an immigrant?





GLP