Sunbinds of Illuminati Kingship

A certain person was a central feature of my dreams last night. I wish this person would disappear from my consciousness. Anyway, it was one of those partly lucid dreams. That is, I was aware of myself sleeping, and it was almost like I was 'watching' this person, not dreaming with them.

There was a certain part of the dream - you see my consciousness, my vision at this point had turned into a bird's eye view, and I could rotate the whole scene like a camera in a game, zoom in and out - I wanted to see the limits of what I could see in the dreamworld, so I zoomed all the way out. What I saw was the hills and the houses of the area were repeating as if they were a sort of giant fractal. It was really interesting.

Once you have been through this, you, of course, will never be the same.

You become "rare" in a way and narrow down who you can relate to in this life to a very small number of people.

There is no going back (unfortunately at times).

Yet, there is some solace in knowing you have navigated a path with many perils that many never make their way through or who choose to turn back.

Yes, you're right. Quite right. It can be a lonely. There have been times that I have wondered if I don't reside in the same dimension as others.

I see that a lot of the psychic experience is accepted as psychosis. But I'm not sure that I accept that explanation.

I read something fascinating about psychologists. While almost everybody has experienced, say anxiety or depression, psychosis is treated - even among those who treat psychotic patients - with a bit of fear, distance, or coldness.

Because, even those in the field of psychology have trouble empathizing with the experience of a psychotic. Of course, for anybody who treats the mentally ill, an inability to empathize is a bit of a hurdle to treatment. And research shows that talking really does help those with psychosis. But a whole lot of psychologists just cannot imagine what it is like to be psychotic, and they aren't a whole lot of use in treating people with psychosis.

Me, I cannot help but wonder if the problem of psychosis is misunderstood. To the therapist, it doesn't matter what the content of the delusion is, or patterns in the scheme of delusions, or patterns in the way that delusions manifest among certain demographics of people in different times.

But the content of the delusion is important. Delusions and psychotic episodes are not random, they have particular themes and symbolic content, irrespective of the person who is having the psychosis or the delusion.

Psychic and paranormal subjects are not yet taken seriously among academic circles, but I believe that there is more and more evidence and support coming in that the psychic and the paranormal do certainly exist and are subject to certain environmental conditions to manifest.

What I, myself, have experienced, could not be understood by any except by those others who have experienced the same. I am certain it is one of those things that others simply cannot wrap their heads around unless they'd been subject to the same anomalous perceptions themselves.

It can, indeed, be lonely.

Oh....and that show looks good.

I agree with you completely. When I was in my "darkness of the soul" time which also came with incredible spiritual experiences, the doctor could care less about the information I was channeling. His primary concern was getting me to take the pills and become "normal". So, I played along and took the low-end anti-depressants but faked taking the anti-psychotics.

I guess one learns to accept these experiences and figures out a way to utilize them rather than trying to get anyone to understand them. I still relate my "gift" at times to those around me on occasion. The people listen and look at me oddly and laugh to which I will laugh along in order to have their fear subside. Been difficult forming friendships after going through what I did personally. Have met some open minded people the last 5 years. However, there is a limit to that as I have found more often than not.

So, lonely it is. Perhaps this is what brings me to GLP and threads like this and a few others.

That Penny Dreadful show is quite good. Actually weaves in material that some people on GLP would find interesting. The occult/Egyptian aspects are excellent.

I believe that Dr. Jung during his Red Book writing phase (which allegedly included his own "psychosis") discovered much that affirmed for him that these states are not what typical psychology theorizes they are, thus the persecution of the "gifted" continues unabated with tools like pills used now rather than overt/covert torture.

Yeah, the mood stabalizers/antipsychotics did literally nothing for me. There was a period of time I was delusional to a high degree but that didn't annull the actual weirdness that was going on around me. Somebody earlier on the thread mentioned to me that what I might have experienced was a 'brief reactive psychosis' which is highly possible because it doesn't seem to fall into other categories. But certainly, the meds did nothing to stop the delusions/psychosis. Only time did that.

And there was the stuff that shattered my mind in the first place. Real, genuine trauma. Stuff I still can't wrap my head around. It still haunts me...every single day.

But hey, that is why I always feel I have a place here also. These are among the few kinds of people who will - well some of us anyhow - understand these types of experiences...and not everybody is instantaneously going to jump to the explanation of the status quo, but since we are among those prone to psychic experiences as such, it behooves us to look deeper, and start connecting the dots.

Inevitably though, of course, the farther you spring down the rabbit hole, the harder it is to ever turn back around. Once you open 'those' doors, they don't shut, not ever again. I suppose in a lot of ways this place is bad for mental health, as a primary place for rabbit hole leaping as it is....

I have lost a lot of my friends. I suppose in part it's a divergence of interests, maybe in part time, maybe in part I have been a bad friend myself, selfish...but certainly I find myself a lot lonelier than I used to be, even six months ago. Everything has changed and indeed, the things I have seen, which cannot be unseen....set me apart in way that I don't think western medicine has the means to fix.

Jung had never really accepted religion or spirituality the way it was sold to him, but that never stopped him from seeking the answers as a man of intuition, science, and a student of the riddles of the human mind.

The Red Book, in which he experienced visions and visitations from entities, others may have attributed to psychosis, but I - and I felt this way the first time I came across and read The Red Book - do not think it can be called a product of delusion or psychosis, but of deep vision and initiation. And I think it was, for Jung, deeply revelatory, as he had been tortured his whole life with questions of the nature of the spirit, and at the end of his life, the spirit, 'found him'...so to speak...

It was a great read as well, and the symbolic and archetypal nature of his 'quest' and his experiences is incontrovertible...I don't think a good researcher could really call such amazingly mythological content 'psychotic' - but I know, those who have written the history, psychiatrists/psychologists who study his work foremost among them - tend to classify it that way.

Last Edited by Caylus Ark on 04/25/2016 12:15 AM

I know I speak of things you already know quite well.

Just want you to know how much we enjoy your presence and appreciate all of the things you give to us on this forum.

You have friends out here, friends that are here for you at all times. I know you know this too.

We have been through battles together. We see the planet shift this way and that, contributing what we can to the best of our abilities.

We were spawned from trauma, but we will not let that stop us, though we can never go back to before what made us...us.

Much love to all.

I appreciate the sentiment, ED...very very much.


And I didn't mean to come off so...ranty...

Kayli I guess that is why I offered to help in some way
as I understand what you are talking about as if it were myself in the mirror. I am so sorry that who I am and my path has affected so many people around me in a negative way - without a way back - or out, and I know any interactions in the past with myself might have caused problems for you, but its best not too discuss that in too much detail now.

stop beating yourself up please. it serves no purpose. everyone f**ks up in life at some stage or at least thinks they did. if you only knew the opportunities i missed out on in the past simply because i thought there would be something else or better or more exiting in front of me round the next corner. stupid choices. blind as a bat. just didn't see it as it really was. sadly it doesn't always work out too well and then you end up wasting so much of your current time and life thinking about the past - dark clouds of ye olde regrets, while there is time now to do something positive and good and even fun and exciting. bring back the laughter and happiness.

i sense the sadness as it resonates within me and my own deep sadness about many things that i guess now will always be a part of my personality make up. we change irrevocably despite our well laid plans and good intentions not to. that pain can actually make you into a far more evolved soul that has that understanding of suffering to share with others. probably means nothing now though. i know how irritating these types of responses can be, its a bitter pill - another cliche but somewhat true.

a perfect life is all very well, all hollywood and glamour and making waves and shit, but looking back, eventually it will amount to nothing but a bit of ego stroking and you will be forgotten and discarded like many others on that path. instead you have had the opportunity that few really have, of advancing yourself rapidly through actual physical experience. you can't put a value on that - it is immeasurable. you will see. and who knows maybe you can still do some of the things you were going to do anyway. just take it slow. I know there are still many things I wish to do even though they seem so far out of reach now.

never give up hope. a brighter future awaits - that is not just patronizing talk. i believe it. and sorry if it sounds a bit trite. internet is not the best place for these discussions knowing others are watching.

all the best. speak again soon.

I didn't find you ranty. And I should know because I am the self-proclaimed King of Rants :-)

good morning
ss on seer thread posting to

nice

[link to news.nationalgeographic.com]

Caylus on dimension:

I was immersed in the topic of dimension today and found how it can be a lonely experience for lots of people. I wrote an in depth post about it that was ate. Many don't notice when they are in different dimensions because of time invariance which can cause transient memory. The transient memory is not good for the soul, causes sickness and stress. There is two types of souls. I won't say because might be why got ate, but goes to the two domaens when in transient memory to be moved(judged/scales) into different dimensions. In those, personality(soul) alters or changes dependent on what dimension it is within. Which can cause loneliness because if not at the same vibration as other souls/personalities within the dimension you are within, you are on your own basically. It goes both ways-them at your velocity or you at theirs. Interestingly, because of the personality changes in the mortal soul you can see perspective that personality of the mortal soul is emotionally influenced by other personalities and their dimensions/environments. Knowing that, the two domaens can get a little less constricting on what dimension to be within.

ha! Found the b word. Tried to write that for a long time, lol

First one was written better but oh well, lol

Mortal soul and immortal soul was the two. The domaens is astral and ethereal.

Note immortal soul personality does not change.

/z\ brilliant

Yes, been on the magic school bus.
Judgement and perspective topic

can you broaden that /z\ meaning

If the silent one aka boogeyman lets me, lol
I gotta go right now. But will when I get back. Had a really immersed day back to the start, with silent one. Goes to the last which does involve satan(initial guardian) topic. It's very interesting, will throw a little osiris isis in there

That's the trailer anyways

you went all the way
as you do

crucible thing

.

.

.

The mortal soul is what gains and looses in their capacity like a battery. When comes to an event due to transient memory usually/stress or the squeeze, it goes into a dimension which analyses the gain and loss to then the astral domaen(had to spell it that way). Then if deemed by astral, to the ethereal. After that, is moved into whatever dimension on scale. The mortal soul experiences 3 deaths in a lifetime before the final death but does not account those as death, as they seemingly survive, mind and though or intervention thing. The memory of soul during those event forgets, is like a mask. The mortal soul is also a mask. Written a bit choppy and might not be right but getting there. The immortal soul is another story which goes with the curse of immortality(nephilim story). It's peachy, lol

mood song for it, lol