This is Your Time to Shine!

In all honesty, I don't know anymore. Perhaps I never really knew, but I'm just exhausted to my core. Since the moment of my birth, this world has hated me, and tried to destroy me. For awhile I long thought, the many actions tht kept me from death, was a blessing, but lately I wonder if I would of been better of dying all those times, I should of died, and the one time I did actually die, but was sent back, after my stay in oblivion/nirvana/shapeless void.

I grow upset, even though I care deeply for the Lord, because of how utterly wicked the world is, for how messed up it is, because it does not adhere to even the boot straps of the Word, let alone it's substance.

In my heart, when ever I plead, all I hear is "study the Law, study the Word". Sometimes I adhere, sometimes I do not. When I do not, I sin, and I sin in the hopes of dying.

Recently, someone here wrote, describing the "Lake of Fire", as a trash bin. Someplace, souls go to cease to exist, never to exist again, nor be remembered. In that moment, it sounded more tempting then the thoughts of the New Creation.

If someone asked, "do you love the Lord", or "do you love your neighbor", I could not answer at all, as I cannot comprehend, the concept of "love". It is simply beyond my life experiences.

In the past, I could not understand affection, until I adopted a pet from it's infancy, and realized that yes, I'm indeed an affectionate person. It did indeed help me realize also, that I do care, deeply for things, when I understood what "caring" meant.

I did not understanding the concept, of truly "coveting" something, until I recently did, and it was a horrible experience. The main trigger, was when it hit me, I grew jealous(never really felt that before, as well), because of the sheer material wealth and assistance, people I know of who call themselves "Christian"(as well as others), give to people that I know to not only be godless, but outright enemies of the Lord, it caused me to stumble with despair. For even those who claimed to follow the Lord, showed greater kindness to those who hate the Lord and mark him as their enemy, through both deeds and words, then to one such as myself.

When a tiny shred of materialism entered my heart, I knew I was naked. I might as well of spent my entire life, naked in the wilderness. Even though, many in my family(Uncles, grandparents, etc), where fairly well to do, in my youth I wore clothes that where often little better than rags, and in my young adulthood, I went through a period of actual starvation, both times they turned their backs to me, with one even mocking me, my own biological dad.

I just don't see the difference between good and evil anymore. With the world going to hell in a handbasket, it is just too much to bear. When I look at it all, it seems like everything is loaded dice, a stacked deck of cards, a rigged machine. Ontop of that, I believe I tasted, understood, some of the bitterness of the Book of Revelations, and it is all more than I can withstand. The one thing that got me through my childhood, was the concept "tomorrow might be a better day". I realize, that day will never come. I cannot envision myself in the New Creation.

It is as though my soul has been deeply scourged, my entire life, day in and day out, as though I'm a bloody mess. My cup is full, and more is being added to it, as if I'm hated by all, and the only reason I'm kept alive, is to toy with me.

Then I chide myself for giving into despair, even though others had it far worse then I ever did, and that starts it's own vicious cycle. I just don't know anymore.

Do you see triple numbers or 11:11 on a recurring basis Me? I believe those that do are Israel of the bible.

I dont think anyone...even the ones who have a good idea about whats about to happen...will be truly prepared for whats about to happen.

When the games cease...and the accusations stop...when the many become one...and the labels are dropped...when all hearts beat as one...and what is owned by one is owned by all...and what is owned by all is owned by one...when the outcasts are taken in...and the prodigals return...when the law is love and no longer broken...and the wounded hearts made whole...and the glory of the majesty glows from every face high and low..

Then the bride shall shine...and the wedding bells shall ring out.

The consummation of the ages...of the Christ...Lord Emmannuel and his wife...one in spirit..one in heart...one in mind...one in love.

The children of the Bride and her Majestic Husband...the endless ages of the eternals to fulfill...forever growing...ever increasing...universes beyond count...love without measure...many little ones...the children of the creator and His wife...shall number untold trillions...

And it all begins...

With....

Love..

What is about to happen...is beyond comprehension.

But its Basis is love.

Its Author is love.

Its reason is love.

For the creator is...

LOVE.

...The greatest of these is love.

In all honesty, I don't know anymore. Perhaps I never really knew, but I'm just exhausted to my core. Since the moment of my birth, this world has hated me, and tried to destroy me. For awhile I long thought, the many actions tht kept me from death, was a blessing, but lately I wonder if I would of been better of dying all those times, I should of died, and the one time I did actually die, but was sent back, after my stay in oblivion/nirvana/shapeless void.

I grow upset, even though I care deeply for the Lord, because of how utterly wicked the world is, for how messed up it is, because it does not adhere to even the boot straps of the Word, let alone it's substance.

In my heart, when ever I plead, all I hear is "study the Law, study the Word". Sometimes I adhere, sometimes I do not. When I do not, I sin, and I sin in the hopes of dying.

Recently, someone here wrote, describing the "Lake of Fire", as a trash bin. Someplace, souls go to cease to exist, never to exist again, nor be remembered. In that moment, it sounded more tempting then the thoughts of the New Creation.

If someone asked, "do you love the Lord", or "do you love your neighbor", I could not answer at all, as I cannot comprehend, the concept of "love". It is simply beyond my life experiences.

In the past, I could not understand affection, until I adopted a pet from it's infancy, and realized that yes, I'm indeed an affectionate person. It did indeed help me realize also, that I do care, deeply for things, when I understood what "caring" meant.

I did not understanding the concept, of truly "coveting" something, until I recently did, and it was a horrible experience. The main trigger, was when it hit me, I grew jealous(never really felt that before, as well), because of the sheer material wealth and assistance, people I know of who call themselves "Christian"(as well as others), give to people that I know to not only be godless, but outright enemies of the Lord, it caused me to stumble with despair. For even those who claimed to follow the Lord, showed greater kindness to those who hate the Lord and mark him as their enemy, through both deeds and words, then to one such as myself.

When a tiny shred of materialism entered my heart, I knew I was naked. I might as well of spent my entire life, naked in the wilderness. Even though, many in my family(Uncles, grandparents, etc), where fairly well to do, in my youth I wore clothes that where often little better than rags, and in my young adulthood, I went through a period of actual starvation, both times they turned their backs to me, with one even mocking me, my own biological dad.

I just don't see the difference between good and evil anymore. With the world going to hell in a handbasket, it is just too much to bear. When I look at it all, it seems like everything is loaded dice, a stacked deck of cards, a rigged machine. Ontop of that, I believe I tasted, understood, some of the bitterness of the Book of Revelations, and it is all more than I can withstand. The one thing that got me through my childhood, was the concept "tomorrow might be a better day". I realize, that day will never come. I cannot envision myself in the New Creation.

It is as though my soul has been deeply scourged, my entire life, day in and day out, as though I'm a bloody mess. My cup is full, and more is being added to it, as if I'm hated by all, and the only reason I'm kept alive, is to toy with me.

Then I chide myself for giving into despair, even though others had it far worse then I ever did, and that starts it's own vicious cycle. I just don't know anymore.

She said stop! stop! stop!
Get out your heart
Haven't got a lot
But play the part
Mister stop! stop! stop!
Get out your heart

What I've got's hot stuff
The night is ours

(Here in glow of love) You're a shinin' star
(Here in glow of love) No matter who you are
(Here in glow of love) So I want to let you know you move me, yeah, yeah
....

All the people meeting people
Laughing, dancin' till the dawn
And we'll always be like this
Glowing in the glow of love


....

Never lonely with you only
Time will always be our friend
Reaching far to find a star
Our destiny is heaven sent

Darkness all around me
Blockin' out the sun
Old friends call me
But I just don't feel like talkin' to anyone
Emptiness has found me
And it just won't let me go
I go right on livin'
But why, I just don't know (You're too strong, got to keep on keepin' on)
Yes, I am (You're too strong, got to keep on keepin' on)

....

Staring down reality
Don't do me no good
'Cause our misunderstanding
Is too well understood (Too well understood)

Such a sad, sad season (Sad, sad season)
When a good love dies (When a good love dies)
Not a day goes by (Not a day goes by)
When I don't realize (Realize)

Ooh, ooh, oh, I've really got to use (I've got to use)
My imagination (I've got to use)
To think of good reasons (I've got to use)
To keep on keepin' on (I've got to use)
I've got to make the best of (Best of, best of)
A bad situation (Bad situation)
Ever since that day (Ever since that day)
I woke up and found out
That you were gone (You're too strong, got to keep on keepin' on)

Here is another song, and it is about Jesus searching for the warmth of a light which is your soul. And when he found that light it said, if you're alone you can make this (my heart) your home, Jesus.

He just wanted to dance with your soul.

Lookit this part:



Your soul said stop right there Jesus, get out Your Heart and give it to me, that is what I want the most! Your soul said that I have not got a lot, but I did play the part, I followed you in my heart.

Now that the soul has Jesus' Heart, she has hot stuff and the night of darkness that we are right now, is all ours.

And of course the music is awesome too.

Enjoy!

btw it is Luther Vandross singing with this group before he went solo.

Change - Searching



[link to www.youtube.com (secure)]

Hey there Jesus! Stop stop stop! Gimme that Heart!

Me114

whoops here are the words
[link to www.lyricsbox.com]

Thanks for all of the tunes!
Good stuff!
God talks to thru old songs to.
Heres what he brought to my mind recently

I gotta take a little time, a little time to think things over
I better read between the lines, in case I need it when I'm older

Now this mountain I must climb, feels like the world upon my shoulders
Through the clouds I see love shine, it keeps me warm as life grows colder

Mat 24:12 And because iniquity shall abound, the love of many shall wax cold.

In my life there's been heartache and pain
I don't know if I can face it again

Can't stop now, I've traveled so far, to change this lonely life

I want to know what love is, I want you to show me
I want to feel what love is, I know you can show me

I'm gonna take a little time, a little time to look around me

I've got nowhere left to hide, it looks like love has finally found me

(And I want to feel) I want to feel what love is

In all honesty, I don't know anymore. Perhaps I never really knew, but I'm just exhausted to my core. Since the moment of my birth, this world has hated me, and tried to destroy me. For awhile I long thought, the many actions tht kept me from death, was a blessing, but lately I wonder if I would of been better of dying all those times, I should of died, and the one time I did actually die, but was sent back, after my stay in oblivion/nirvana/shapeless void.

I grow upset, even though I care deeply for the Lord, because of how utterly wicked the world is, for how messed up it is, because it does not adhere to even the boot straps of the Word, let alone it's substance.

In my heart, when ever I plead, all I hear is "study the Law, study the Word". Sometimes I adhere, sometimes I do not. When I do not, I sin, and I sin in the hopes of dying.

Recently, someone here wrote, describing the "Lake of Fire", as a trash bin. Someplace, souls go to cease to exist, never to exist again, nor be remembered. In that moment, it sounded more tempting then the thoughts of the New Creation.

If someone asked, "do you love the Lord", or "do you love your neighbor", I could not answer at all, as I cannot comprehend, the concept of "love". It is simply beyond my life experiences.

In the past, I could not understand affection, until I adopted a pet from it's infancy, and realized that yes, I'm indeed an affectionate person. It did indeed help me realize also, that I do care, deeply for things, when I understood what "caring" meant.

I did not understanding the concept, of truly "coveting" something, until I recently did, and it was a horrible experience. The main trigger, was when it hit me, I grew jealous(never really felt that before, as well), because of the sheer material wealth and assistance, people I know of who call themselves "Christian"(as well as others), give to people that I know to not only be godless, but outright enemies of the Lord, it caused me to stumble with despair. For even those who claimed to follow the Lord, showed greater kindness to those who hate the Lord and mark him as their enemy, through both deeds and words, then to one such as myself.

When a tiny shred of materialism entered my heart, I knew I was naked. I might as well of spent my entire life, naked in the wilderness. Even though, many in my family(Uncles, grandparents, etc), where fairly well to do, in my youth I wore clothes that where often little better than rags, and in my young adulthood, I went through a period of actual starvation, both times they turned their backs to me, with one even mocking me, my own biological dad.

I just don't see the difference between good and evil anymore. With the world going to hell in a handbasket, it is just too much to bear. When I look at it all, it seems like everything is loaded dice, a stacked deck of cards, a rigged machine. Ontop of that, I believe I tasted, understood, some of the bitterness of the Book of Revelations, and it is all more than I can withstand. The one thing that got me through my childhood, was the concept "tomorrow might be a better day". I realize, that day will never come. I cannot envision myself in the New Creation.

It is as though my soul has been deeply scourged, my entire life, day in and day out, as though I'm a bloody mess. My cup is full, and more is being added to it, as if I'm hated by all, and the only reason I'm kept alive, is to toy with me.

Then I chide myself for giving into despair, even though others had it far worse then I ever did, and that starts it's own vicious cycle. I just don't know anymore.

I found it, so I will have to post the version from the Message Bible, in the KJV it says with Great Mercies.

Isa 54:7 Your Redeemer GOD says: "I left you, but only for a moment. Now, with enormous compassion, I'm bringing you back.


May God touch you with His tender mercies this day!

Me114

p.s. sorry for the clutter, as I could not find which one was crashing GLP.