I will tell you some secrets for no other reason than to jade my family. I am of the bloodlines.

You should ground yourself. Do you have a park or patch of woods nearby? The less cellphone/wifi near it, the better.

Take a beach towel (cotton), a book, some water and fruit... spend some time outside on the ground, if you can put your back against a tree, even better.

**leave your cellphone in the car, or if the anxiety of not having it is too much, then at least put it in airplane mode, or better yet, turn it off.

Ok- will do at 4pm and will update you tonight ... So relieved ...aaahhhhhh

Anything that exists in, or within, your thoughts is also controllable by your thoughts. If something is in you, it becomes a part of you; it has no choice. It won't tell you how to stop it from being the controller, but there is a part of you that is more powerful. Your inner soul spark of Source, no matter how veiled or tiny, is still larger than the darkness that attempts to invade or block it.

Darkness cannot envelop light! (Black hole is another story I can make expanded sense of.) Light is a particle/wave, darkness is the absence of it. Light yourself up. Visually see you core inner spark expanding like a sphere of loving light. Grow it until it expands and surrounds your entire body. Feel it pushing and dissolving any shadows. Become the fullness of the light that you are, and of, and use it. Know it.

If that is too new age, try this philosophically psychological visual on for size..

I visually traveled to Source core one night and was able to feel like the dancer, the one, trying on the shoes of Source perspective. A shadow came and tried to enter. I spun around in spirals and watched my white dress layers expand into infinity as they enveloped the shadow on the edges of the hem. The more I would spin, the more the shadow would fall and tumble away into fractal infinity.

The shadow was the 'Lucifer', the fallen angel of darkness trying to become and then surpass the Truth and goodness of God. Lucifer had entered the core as well, wanting all the secrets to become his own god, but he didn't progress with nature Her way. He wanted to cheat the system and have it his way. I was showing this form, of mySelf, that loving spirit was more powerful than invasive darkness out of place.

S/He told me something when I got there, "I even hide things from myself." Being of fractal infinity, this made sense. Existence is light.. movement and vibration, and non-existence, which is also Source, but is still and silent. This form of darkness, Lucifer or separate ego self, was wanting to exist as powerful vibrating darkness instead of accepting the proper way and balance.. of nature. Darkness, non-existence, has no vibration or power other than what we give it and even that is merely a lower vibrating form of light.

I know it sounds crazy, but it is what it is. It made so much sense to me, that I'll share it regardless of naysayers. It helped me and if it helps even one other person, then I am thankful. You're not crazy and neither am I. Our experiences can be brandished with any label, but the 'end' result is always The Way.

These quick thoughts above are not perfect. It's still something I'm in the process of expanding. I don't expect anyone to understand all of it, because it's me, my way. I trust it so much, that I'm willing to toss it on the public table for scrutiny without perfection (from a perfectionist). I see someone reaching out and I sure as heck won't stand by without offering another of many life preservers to choose from just to save my own possible negative perception by others. It always comes down to fear, our biggest hindrance. This "blah, blah, blah" from me is to show you one of the ways I face and confront fear.

Ok, stopping self here. I could go on and on. I'd rather over explain then under explain.

T has my email if you'd like to go further...
This was "placed" on me.

That's odd. There is no reason in the system why she cannot be upgraded.

Mila, make sure you are using the user ID and not the member number you see by her name. I did that before! Looks like I did not use the right terminology, but go to her member page and there is another number you use.

Last Edited by bigD111 on 08/23/2016 03:45 PM

How exactly? Do you know? I can't pm either, but feel free to post in one of my threads. If any of what I said rings true to you, or feels at least believable, and you're willing to explore all avenues, then I'm also willing to expand and ask and answer questions to help you solve this.

I've read this twice and will read again... I'm not sure how it was placed or by who- only have a little info so far... But with help from those I'm working with we'll figure it out.
Off to fold laundry and then visit my tree for a little grounding :)

I went to the "Upgrade account" page and put in her member ID where it asks to do that and got "This member cannot currently be upgraded" or something similar. I'll PM you.

[link to youtu.be (secure)]





[link to youtu.be (secure)]


Just going to leave these here as food for thought.

Ok. Good luck! Perhaps Merit will come in with a short, yet deep, answer that will help. He's good at that.

LMAO! None of mine are on video either but I'm ALWAYS the person who gets taken down with the friend who wipes out. Usually because, when drunk I'm affectionate with girlfriends and do the whole walking arm in arm kinda girly love fest, and BOOM one goes down and it's over. I'd have taken the face plant with you on the cruise, I'm sure. I'm pretty good at drunk walking in high heels though, I have to say. I can mostly still stick to the straight line and not wobble side to side LOL

The face plant fails reminded me of this and I figured everyone could use a good laugh LOL:

In your situation this is a weapon mantra. It kicks negative energy asses. Do not be surprised if you cry. Feeling overwhelming and powerful help on your side while doing it. Let yourself cry and keep singing.

Why did you use the term "kidnapped"? (Tandym?)

Your feelings that tandym is mad at you is the parasite. Trying to break you away from her.

Yes the whole "if I do not believe in it something it can't hurt me" philosophy is basically bullshit.

It is a will power game. If they believeit works with more will than you believe it doesn't you are beat. If they have been doing it for years with success then good luck convincing them it doesn't work.

It would be like saying you can not be hypnotized because you do not think it's possible. That has been proven wrong so many times magicians do it on cruise ships as a parlor trick. In many cases someone's lack of belief makes it easier on the one using it against you as you do not defend against it, thinking it impossible.


Use that mantra for now. It is for clearing out parasites in the aura.

I am up to my neck in a problem here as well.

Use it. It will work.

LOL yes, let's all fly over to Hellozac and do a male strip club. Magic Mike stuff.
When's your birthday, Hellozac? Have anything special planned? :-)

If only we could all be more like that little turtle. Super chill.

Pavana, I can't find the picture of your doggie that you put up but I wanted to tell you how adorable he is! Those ears!!! I melted. All these little doggies everywhere.

This is only my opinion but in 2012 I went through what you are going through now.

It was strange. I didn't know what to do. Someone said it's depression. Someone else said it was hormones. Someone else said it was getting the wifi into the house! lol.

To be honest I was shaken to the core with it all. Literally shaking.
There was no one that understood and you think you are loosing it, totally.

Then I picked up the phone and rang someone. A complete stranger. She said to write down in whatever form it came in. I wrote and wrote. Drew pictures. Poured it all out in those large copy books.
One of the pictures were a washing line filled with polo shirts. His uniform, my uniform and the children's school uniforms. I never wanted a life in a uniform.

Then sent it to her.

When I went to see her she shrugged her shoulders and said that I had had a HUGE awakening. As if it was nothing! What?! How dare she shrug her shoulders! I was going through hell!

Sure what does an awakening mean when it's at home??? Awakening? My hole. But she was 100% correct.

Those that look inside awaken, those that look outside dream.

Your path isn't your path until you look inside and you must have looked inside.
Now you have to alter your course in order to follow what you were put here to do.
That's your "shift".
Instead of doing stuff for everyone else eg family, friends, neighbours you have reached your elastic limit.

It's time for you to find out what it is YOU need for YOU and what YOU are supposed to be.

Is it selfish? No
Is it self centred? No
Will your whole world fall apart, the lifestyle you have built, the friends you've made. No.(well maybe a little)

Things become simplified.

You find your course, like on a river and then the river takes you downstream instead of you swimming against the current, killing yourself for what? for who?

No one can tell you what course is except you.

You know yourself better than anyone.

For me it was Truth, Nature and Knowledge.

You know what it is deep down.

Do me a favour and have a look at the symptoms of having an Awakening. Google it.

Seemingly this happens, no one ever told me about it but it does.

We are here.

I think it's safe to say the man has seen far worse than an Irish lady who likes to cut loose on Friday nights ;-) Give me some liquor and I turn into the happiest bubbliest person on the planet. Some people would say that is FAR more annoying and horrible that someone who turns rage-y after some liquor LOL. Not everyone likes happy bubbly people who act like cheerleaders when loaded.

Last Edited by MilaMoon on 08/23/2016 04:53 PM

Naw, then I'd have to get a boat and go out there and get you. And I don't really feel like travelling out to Spike Island to pick your ass up. <3

Yeah, some stones are drawn to us and us to them. Lately I have been very, very drawn to star sapphires. I've been looking at some pieces online and something about them is really speaking to me.

LOL
Happy birthday to your mam!!! Sending her lots of love.

I want her to use Samhain this October. That is my target date to finish this fecker off. I will send her to you for a proper education and mindset on the matter. If you do not mind.

Got it, will do. I'll try again this evening. I think I used the number and the name and got the same result but I'll see if it is resolved after I mentioned it to LJS.

Big hugs, BigD!!!

A fine day to you too, Ms Flutterby.


OMG! I Love Maxine! lol
It would be mighty hard to compete with that.
Okay, scratch the quips book lol


Manpon... lol I'm just going to have to ignore that one.

That, Sir would be an honour.

Man, I felt so stupid with what I posted about toes. It was like, duh. But I'm the one who takes a while to get jokes too so, lol.

Speaking of toes, I forgot to tell you about our cat "Toes". She has 7 toes on each front paw. I'll have to post a pic sometime.




Ooo, I enjoyed that story. Thanx Niamh. I had to conquer a depression monster. You offer good advice. :)

Pavana, isn't it a great thing though when you do come through that.....dreadful awful.

You see things in an entirely different way.

A new light shines on everything and you see what you hadn't seen since you were a child in a new kind of magical wonder.

It's not easy. Not at all. But you go with it and whoosh.

God love people that go through that on their own.

It's great when people have the courage to speak up about how they feel. Really feel. I admire that kind of courage.

Popping in real quick from under my tree
Feeling a lot better..
I have the mantra memorized, just need to find my comfortable vocal tone (I hear it said high in my head, but vocally I have to go much lower- or should I?)
[link to a63.tinypic.com]


Really need to thank ALL of you who have contributed.

Thank you :)

Hello, pretty lady. Nice to see you.
I'm delighted you are feeling better.

Beannacht leat.