A Slave or Robot of God for those who see 1111

jmralight wrote:
"If, as I assert, there is a Personal God that "talks" to me, how could that be less important than thinking for myself, which I do all the time. My thoughts are corrected, modified and improved by reason of my God's desire to share with me the powerful glory of his creation. I am never bored. I am at peace with my place in the world and my personal history. All because there is a God and for God I am a work in progress as I grow to appreciate the art of creation from the smallest particle to the grandeur of galaxies. I try to share myself because I believe I am blessed and I desire nothing as much as sharing my blessing with others."

A short while after writing this I felt as if God's hand was holding me like King Kong held onto that woman, only God's thumb is on my head. He is squeezing me hard and the feeling is very uncomfortable. At the same time, the site here went psychotic and the whole world seems to be getting ever more corrupt and ever more insane. Novelty is everywhere, particularly in the sciences, where the most fundamental processes of nature are being controlled by modern scientists.
11:11, which started as a novelty, has become a cliche.
"It's 11:11! make a wish!."
I made a wish and it was a big one. I wished God would send a messenger to teach humanity how to achieve peace on earth. No less than that. I was caught in a contradiction, because shortly after making my wish, God told me I am the one I am waiting for. I immediately said no Exclamation I said "Kill me and Bless my children!" And then the Angel I was talking to simply said "Amen".
So, perhaps, it is time for me to die.
Perhaps, after my death, people will reexamine what I have been writing and talking about these past fifteen years. If I die before September, then I believe that surely, what I have been saying about a great calamity in Amerika will come true. That would make for good art. God has sent a prophet that practically no one would listen to, until after his death. Like Jesus. Yet it is a fate I reject because I love life too much to die at my own hand.
I am not going to kill myself even though the feeling I am experiencing is so uncomfortable, the idea has crossed my mind. This is very important to understand. As a robot, I have no ability to prevent myself from swallowing all my meds and dying, if that is what God wants. Yet I am protesting such a fate, as I believe I should! In this protest I am no longer a robot but I am a human being with the experience of freedom of choice, who refuses to die by his own hand.
If God wants me dead, He will have to kill me himself, as I will resist all suicidal thoughts unless I am so overwhelmed by psychic pains that I just can't stop myself. I will fight for my own life against the psychic pain and even go on to say,
IT IS NOT A GOOD THING TO BE GOD'S ROBOT.
Particularly if such a belief leads one to believe one should kill any kind of living creatures, as a sacrifice, including of course one's self. I am not a Christian. I wont die to have any one's sins forgiven. I can only pray to be forgiven for my own.
I believed the desire to be God's robot was a good thing.
It is not.
Neither is it a good thing to be God's slave. It is very meritable to be God's servant with social rights, to go on strike, TO PROTEST and refuse to hurt life and living things as an act of God. My God of Art is commanding me to communicate that it is up to man and man's decisions to serve God by enhancing the quality of life for the living and never to kill other human beings on God's behalf.
ISIL comes to mind as the exact opposite of what My God of Art desires from Divine service. On one edge of the spectrum one has murder, rape and torture and on the other hand, love and kindness and empathy. Certainly God has robots on one side of the equation and free men with faith in a Loving Merciful God on the other. I would choose to die myself at God's hand rather than kill myself or anyone else.
So, I have made a grave mistake by asking to be God's robot or slave. Instead I pray to be among all men and women who believe that we are all the children of a Living God, all of us created equal in value, whatever our religious beliefs or our race.
Abraham should have said "KILL ME AND BLESS MY SON, for I refuse to kill my beloved son on your behalf."
What Abraham agreed to do was a symptom of psychosis and should be taught as such.

Please God, forgive me for my spiritual errors as I learn about you and your nature to us, your children. Keep me alive for a long time so I can share my lessons with every one else. You are the sole teacher of my soul. Thank you for hurting me so badly until I let go of terrible ideas I had acquired from others. Jacob fought and defeated your angel and it is The God of Jacob that I serve.

Last Edited by The Messiah on 07/07/2016 06:23 AM