Conspiracy Has Ruined My Life

This is not a whine session, and not intended to be a negative thread against conspiracy, because we need a degree of conspiracy in order to keep things in check.

It all started two years ago. I had a psychological break and believed that I was abducted by an alien, and given information about the shared future for us all. So, right then and there, I was changed. I awoke that morning following the experience, with a message to give, and let me tell you, I did exactly that.

I sent messages to every government agency I thought was relevant. The White House, NASA, The Vatican, and countless scientists whom I found on social networking sites.

I found this place through a google search for "dream with god" as at first I assumed the being I talked to was God himself. That was roughly two years ago. I was atheist before my experience, and only through the experience was I enticed to read the Bible among other holy books. You see, the being showed me a picture of Jesus, and it confused me.

I bought into every conspiracy I ran into during this time, and it was not until I lost my shit while at work in June of last year, that I sought out treatment. I am a war Vet and was diagnosed with PTSD and due to an SSRI that I was prescribed while in the service, I acquired bipolar disorder as well. The pill they prescribed actually gave me bipolar disorder at the age of 35.

I am immersed into conspiracy, but now that I am in treatment for PTSD, conspiracy comes up a lot. My train of thought is off, and may never recover. I distrust everyone from who treats me, to the mailman. All are suspect in my book.

The purpose of this thread is to vent it out. I am still here for the long run as once certain doors are opened in life, there is no closing them....