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My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness

 
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 24513247
United States
07/16/2017 04:29 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
OP, how did your other girlfriends provide you with emotional happiness?
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 74860960
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07/16/2017 04:34 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
I mean she is right, but...the fact you work 3 jobs and she doesnt do shit is where the real problem is. Pathetic.

You also are needy as fuck and need to get over that.
Anonymous-Girl

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07/16/2017 04:35 PM

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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
If two people in a relationship are do not support each other emotionally, are not a team, I don't understand the point of the relationship. It'd be a waste of time in my opinion.
"Unless it's mad, passionate, extraordinary love, it's a waste of your time. There are too many mediocre things in life. Love shouldn't be one of them." ~Dream for an Insomniac

"A rush of blood is not enough...I need my feelings set on fire."
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The Deplorable >LSDMTHC<

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07/16/2017 04:37 PM

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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
Stay at home wife, without kids? what the hell is that? She needs to get a job, especially if your working 3 jobs. wtf
Jrdy787, Theyrecoming, LSDMTHC

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Christian, Husband, Hard worker and a millenial. NO HAND OUTS!
Anonymous Coward
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07/16/2017 04:38 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
I was stunned at this comment and a little lost

For me the very minimum I expect from my partner is emotional support

I work three jobs while she is a stay a home wife without children

What is her role if it isn't to support me as role as breadwinner

Are there any women left who haven't been infected by the poisonous ideology that is feminism or am o expecting too much?

Female comments definitely welcome !!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75232227


3 jobs and she's a stay at home wife without children? Good lord get rid of that parasite. Coming from a woman btw.
Anonymous Coward
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United States
07/16/2017 04:41 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
You better man up or your failed relationship will destroy you.

There's no nice way to put it. Time to harden the fuck up and get on with your life.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 47678081
United States
07/16/2017 04:45 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
Happiness comes from within.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71252427


Happiness comes from within the girl. It can only be accessed through sex and nurturing. It's the only reason for men to bother with girls.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75212949


This
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75232227

I am sure the women see it differently. The man is their warmth and light. Without that they are cold and dark. See how cold women are all alone?

OP see how much power you have? See how much you are doing for her, if she's into you, even without the 3 jobs?

You do need some support from your partner, and she's just taking and taking. Time to send her out to the cold and dark, and find a better woman.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 47678081
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07/16/2017 04:50 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
YOU are not your emotions

YOU let emotions control you

She can be supportive and there for you

You choose how to respond
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75220320


But she isn't supportive

I ask her for n emotional connection when stressed and met with silence or. Fight

Im lost

Where are the real women?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75232227


If you are demanding respect or support, you will never get it from your wife or from others. You have to earn it. Your wife is correct: you are responsible for your own feelings. If you base them on what your wife is going to do or not do, then you are going to be in for a world of pain.

Instead of demanding that she support you, be a man she can admire and support without you demanding that she do.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 74837233

Be that man, but run a competition to allow other women to qualify as well. Date.

If she's so independent, let her be independent.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 74860960
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07/16/2017 04:55 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
YOU are not your emotions

YOU let emotions control you

She can be supportive and there for you

You choose how to respond
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75220320


But she isn't supportive

I ask her for n emotional connection when stressed and met with silence or. Fight

Im lost

Where are the real women?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75232227


If you are demanding respect or support, you will never get it from your wife or from others. You have to earn it. Your wife is correct: you are responsible for your own feelings. If you base them on what your wife is going to do or not do, then you are going to be in for a world of pain.

Instead of demanding that she support you, be a man she can admire and support without you demanding that she do.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 74837233

Be that man, but run a competition to allow other women to qualify as well. Date.

If she's so independent, let her be independent.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 47678081


She's obviously not independent with the way she is mooching off him.
Anonymous Coward
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07/16/2017 04:57 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
I got the same line given to me. Almost cried, but I held it back and said 'Well, guess we are both on our own eh?" It was over and I never missed her again right then and there
Anonymous Coward
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07/16/2017 05:29 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
...


I hate to agree, but QE is right. If you dump her, find an Asian or Eastern European girl. Maybe even a Latina, but not an American. American girls have never been socialized to be proper wives.

If you don't dump her, get couple counseling and she'll leave you.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75212949


Where do all of these wusses come from? So afraid of American women. Thank God I have never run across this in real life. Is it because I live in the South?
 Quoting: Daniel Higdon


Nobody's afraid of American women - we're just disgusted with them. They are entitled, privileged, and have no desire to make a man happy sexually, regardless of how a man appreciates them. All the want is to either get off or get attention, and they'll do it with any man or even a girl. Most have no loyalty and only have sex when they feel like it. Quite honestly, they're not worth the effort.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75212949


Women dont typically become sexually aroused by "appreciation".

It sounds like you dont understand how sex works and probably arent doing it right.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 24513247


Women deserve respect in one way either or the other.
Either they deserve the old fashioned slaving, worship, and being considered the better half, or they must step up to the new responsibilities feminism brought them.

They don't get to have it both ways.

But that seems to be the what's expected today.

I love the comment above about not knowing how sex works.
That applies equally women to men.
Women will not attract the best DNA just by looks alone.

Since feminism, I'm not responsible for your arousal, or seeking your permission, or chasing you.
You want my D? Fling yourself at me .
That's equality. Have a fine day.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 47678081
United States
07/16/2017 09:23 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
...


But she isn't supportive

I ask her for n emotional connection when stressed and met with silence or. Fight

Im lost

Where are the real women?
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75232227


If you are demanding respect or support, you will never get it from your wife or from others. You have to earn it. Your wife is correct: you are responsible for your own feelings. If you base them on what your wife is going to do or not do, then you are going to be in for a world of pain.

Instead of demanding that she support you, be a man she can admire and support without you demanding that she do.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 74837233

Be that man, but run a competition to allow other women to qualify as well. Date.

If she's so independent, let her be independent.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 47678081


She's obviously not independent with the way she is mooching off him.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 74860960

Well yeah, he need to help her along by cutting off the avenues of mooching and expecting her to contribute more nad more. It won't work but then he can kick her to the curb.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 70612173
United States
07/16/2017 09:32 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
Happiness comes from within.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71252427


Happiness comes from within the girl. It can only be accessed through sex and nurturing. It's the only reason for men to bother with girls.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75212949


This
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75232227


You sound like a co=dependent person.

I believe I am usually emotionally stronger than my husband.

He has been pretty co-dependent.

I've just gotten used to it.

He works, I stay home.

However, he freaks if I am upset. I have to keep it together. I listen to his woes and give him advice. Then he's happy. If he whines too much, I tell him.

Sometimes I wish he were stronger, but then I look around and see that I am blessed and he takes care of me too.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 70612173
United States
07/16/2017 09:34 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
I think there are a lot of co-dependent people around because so many people are the product of broken homes. They haven't had the chance to mature properly-- they are always playing catch-up or looking out for someone else. They never had the chance to be cherished by both parents and they are broken.

I wish more families could work out. Our society would benefit.
Bullshit theard
User ID: 73193867
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07/16/2017 09:36 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
First you say "girlfriend " than you call her wife!!!
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 70612173
United States
07/16/2017 09:37 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
Happiness comes from within.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 71252427


Happiness comes from within the girl. It can only be accessed through sex and nurturing. It's the only reason for men to bother with girls.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75212949


This
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75232227


You sound like a co=dependent person.

I believe I am usually emotionally stronger than my husband.

He has been pretty co-dependent.

I've just gotten used to it.

He works, I stay home.

However, he freaks if I am upset. I have to keep it together. I listen to his woes and give him advice. Then he's happy. If he whines too much, I tell him.

Sometimes I wish he were stronger, but then I look around and see that I am blessed and he takes care of me too.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 70612173


PS. I am 57. I stayed home and raised our kids. He's letting me retire early. lol
Anonymous Coward
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07/16/2017 09:55 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
Leave before you have kids. You don't share the same values. Whatever you don't like about her will be multiplied by 10 if you have kids. It will be terrible for you and worse for the kids. Be honest with her and tell her you are not having your needs met, and you are ending the relationship.

While you are responsible for your own happiness, part of that is finding people that nurture that happiness within you, and eliminating those that don't.
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 74960136
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07/16/2017 10:14 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
How do you imagine you have a girlfriend if you have 3 jobs, the kids arnt even yours? Your never home anyway?
pool
NEMO ME IMPUNE LACESSIT

User ID: 74570428
United States
07/16/2017 10:21 PM

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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
I think there are a lot of co-dependent people around because so many people are the product of broken homes.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 70612173


I think people who try and survive past episodes of unhappiness are not co-dependents but suffer the categorization of the fucking psychologists' babble.
Nature begins with reason and ends with experience; Change begins with experience and ends with reason.
Kirk

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07/16/2017 10:29 PM

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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
3 jobs? you work 12posting kiddie porn on twitter feeds a week? I dont think so

??? not what I said

Last Edited by Kirk on 07/16/2017 10:30 PM
Government is a body largely ungoverned.
777
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07/16/2017 10:31 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
Colossians 3:18-19 reiterates this concept. It says, “Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.” From these verses we see that love and respect characterize the roles of both husbands and wives. If these are present, then authority, headship, love, and submission will be no problem for either spouse.
Anonymous Coward
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07/16/2017 10:57 PM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
I was stunned at this comment and a little lost

For me the very minimum I expect from my partner is emotional support

I work three jobs while she is a stay a home wife without children

What is her role if it isn't to support me as role as breadwinner

Are there any women left who haven't been infected by the poisonous ideology that is feminism or am o expecting too much?

Female comments definitely welcome !!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75232227


Nope she isn't. But you better damn well know that you are responsible for hers. If you don't know this yet; you will learn. Women expect "real" men to have no emotions. And you have them, they will eventually groom you to the point that you have none. I haven't cried in at least fiver years maybe ten. People would say oh wow that's great now you're a big tough man. But not really, I am completely numb inside and I think that is the agenda. Turn us into robots who go to work and bring home the resources, and behave however she wants you to without resistance
Anonymous Coward
User ID: 75188771
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07/17/2017 06:51 AM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
OP, sadly you've got a duff one there.

But take note, wives and girlfriends are not mothers to their spouses.

That's not their job.
Seen too many men come to grief on that misguided expectation.

Blame bastard 'feminism'. It's upset the natural order of relationships in every way. So many younger women have no idea how to run a home, nurture children, sustain a family emotionally.
From a real woman
User ID: 75188771
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07/17/2017 06:56 AM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
I was stunned at this comment and a little lost

For me the very minimum I expect from my partner is emotional support

I work three jobs while she is a stay a home wife without children

What is her role if it isn't to support me as role as breadwinner

Are there any women left who haven't been infected by the poisonous ideology that is feminism or am o expecting too much?

Female comments definitely welcome !!
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75232227


Looking at your post again, your relationship is on the rocks and quite probably over in all but name.

Whether you're male or female, if you love your spouse you naturally want to support them emotionally and in all ways you're able.

That's normal, and natural. You can't help it if love is there.

Yes, there are plenty of women who gladly do this for the man they love.
Go look for one of them....
RribbaRribba!

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07/20/2017 04:58 AM
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Re: My girlfriend says she is not responsible for my emotional happiness
in general, she isn't. but your happiness should be a goal of hers. just as her happiness should be a goal of yours.

of course, if she went into the dumps, lets say she had a bad sickness or an emotional unwellness...

you would, just as ever, need to be responsible for your own mental health and happiness.

(and vice versa)

everyone has to be their own best friend.

in fact, when you have a loved one it is one of the responsibilities of relationship land. it's part of the deal.

i need to stay happy and healthy for my hubs, for instance. and he for me.

congrats on having a house person. i think every house should have a house person.
 Quoting: queenbee 72138947


This is absolutely true, yet there are two sides to every coin.


Interesting that after reading all of these people's opinions it is a wonder that she herself in question hasn't answered. You wrote and all talk about responsibility for feelings but havent mentioned anything about what it was that you are feeling?

Make it into a very grey area. I think responsibility is relative, literally or not, it would be intersting to what level responsibility you are expecting r Rom her. Good communication begins with duct tape across the moutth and a smoke! Just some friendly advice....it is interesting tho
No, she is not responsible for his emotional well being. What she is responsible for, however, is fulfilling the role of PARTNER that she has chosen in their partnership.

OP hasn't mentioned the efforts that he makes beyond material providence, but if he shows up for her in the capacity of meeting her physical (intimacy) needs and emotional (intimacy) needs, but she does not return investment into the relationship in an equal capacity, then the relationship exists in a serious state of imbalance.

Separately, we are responsible for our individual strength and well being. When we make the decision with another person to form a partnership, we then become responsible to bring our individual strength and well being to the table and willingly invest in the strength and well being of the partnership. As far as the partnership is concerned, it is no more or no less than the sum of the investment made by BOTH partners.

Regardless of the division of superficial labor, if one partner is providing physical and emotional intimacy to the other but the other does not do the same in return, the giver becomes diminished, the imbalance increases, and the relationship becomes more toxic and volatile.

Moral of the story is, be very damn careful of the partnerships that you make, and walk away from the "partners" that wear the name tag but for some reason are always on break.

Or perhaps just don't give anything worth having yourself, if you can be satisfied with emptiness and illusion.

Good luck.
 Quoting: Anonymous Coward 75216423


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