High Pitch Noise In My Ear Drum Spreads Inside My Head So Annoying What Is It?

Nothing a little Merzbow on headphones couldn't cure.

get ear wax removal kit from your drug store.use it regularly .junk in ear canal is not good..talk to pharamicist too..

the above is the only true post describing the OP question.

OP...if you want to know the truth, there it is.

the QUESTION now is...what will you do with the truth now that it has been presented to you?

look it up. study it.

when you slow yourself down to stillness...you will not hear the noise anymore...

instead you will hear God talking to you....but..not exactly like you would expect.

the noise is reality ...

but 'you' are sped up...way too fast..wound up...like everyone else.

when you can slow down...you will start to hear something different....something understandable...

this is as real as it gets...

meditation is the only way you will find the answer.

There is a surgery to tighten the muscles int he ear to make the vibration less. Ask an ENT about it. I get tinnitus, from sinus trouble ear infections and loud music, but my hearing is still excellent. Sometimes the tv seems loud at even 13 or 14, which is a whisper, so it comes and goes. I also think some people are sensitive to sound waves and and frequencies.

You're constipated. So you hear the crying of turds. They cry because they pine. Pining to be set free. Free to roam the sewers. The sewers of their youth.

cock

Do some research on HAARP and project blue beam. Also time is short for all who are reading this. Get your hearts right with the Lord Jesus Christ. He's coming back soon. He will either come back as your Saviour or your Judge. It's your decision. God bless.

It´s Nada, the sound current. A spiritual sound.

Your right, I hear 3 tones!

Possibly tennitus

Ads on tv for a product called Quietus supposed to get rid of tinnitus. Here's an article from AARP's web site about it which also mentions the herb ginko & other things as possible remedies..

Evaluating homeopathic approaches to tinnitus

For millions of people, the quietest room is never quiet enough. Even when surrounded by silence, they can hear a ringing or buzzing in their ears that drives them to distraction. The sound is called tinnitus, and sufferers often people with hearing trouble thanks to advanced age or loud sounds are willing to go to great lengths to stop the noise.

Some plead with their doctors to cut their hearing nerves completely, but even this drastic measure won't help. The few patients who have had the procedure could still hear their tinnitus and nothing else.

Tinnitus can sometimes be treated with electronic masking devices that help obscure the sound. And some patients find relief from cognitive behavioral therapy, a type of counseling that can encourage people to think about things other than their tinnitus.

These approaches don't work for everyone, and they can be expensive, so it's no wonder that many people end up looking for tinnitus relief in a pill. Options include Quietus, a homeopathic supplement advertised on radio and television. (Not to be confused with Quietus, the fictional suicide pill in the 2006 science fiction film "Children of Men.") A bottle of 60 tablets, a one-month supply if taken twice daily as directed, costs $99. The website doesn't list any ingredients, and Preval Group, the PR firm that represents Quietus, didn't respond to requests for information. A man who answered the phone for the Quietus customer service hotline would say only that the product contains a "powerful lineup of ingredients."

Another option is Tinnitus Relief Formula from Arches Health Products. Each capsule contains 120 milligrams of ginkgo biloba along with zinc and garlic extract. Users are instructed to take two capsules twice daily. If you order from the company website, you can buy a bottle of 100 capsules for $35. Arches also sells a "combo pack," which includes four bottles of Tinnitus Relief Formula, a bottle of a "high potency B vitamin complex" and a bottle of vitamin B-12. The pack, good for a three-month supply when taken as directed, costs about $150.

Claims: The TV ad for Quietus says that the product "has helped thousands of people with tinnitus" and will "stop the ringing fast." The ad doesn't explain how Quietus is supposed to work, although the website does clarify that it was "created by a rock drummer" to treat his tinnitus.

The website for Tinnitus Relief Formula says "if you do only one thing for your tinnitus … this is it!" The site also says that "many individuals will experience a reduction in symptoms in four weeks."

The bottom line: A lot of patients ask if Quietus or other tinnitus supplements are worth a try, says audiologist Jeff Carroll, director of the Tinnitus Treatment Center at UC Irvine. "If I thought that these products worked, I would offer them in my clinic in a heartbeat," he says. But to his mind, there's no solid evidence that the supplements are of use. "We don't recommend them."

Quietus is a homeopathic treatment, which means the tablets will contain only the slightest trace of active ingredients, whatever they are. Homeopathy has never been carefully studied for tinnitus, but the National Center for Complementary and Alternative Medicine notes that the homeopathic approach to medicine is "controversial" because its "key concepts are not consistent with established laws of science."

Unlike homeopathy, ginkgo really has been put to the scientific test with mixed results. Some clinical trials have found that the herb, believed to improve circulation to the inner ear, can quiet the noise in some patients. For example, a 1986 French study of 103 patients who had recently developed tinnitus found that half of the subjects reported relief after taking a ginkgo supplement for 70 days. Other studies, including a 2001study of more than 1,100 tinnitus sufferers in England, have found that ginkgo didn't work any better than a placebo or sugar pill. The German Commission E, a generally respected source on herbal remedies, has concluded that taking 240 mg of ginkgo twice a day can be helpful for tinnitus.

Even believers in ginkgo don't claim that it works for everyone. "We know that there are no cures," says Dr. Michael Seidman, director of the Division of Otologic-Neurotolgic Surgery in the Department of Otolaryngology- Head & Neck Surgery at Henry Ford Hospital in Detroit. Seidman, who is the chair-elect of the board of governors for the American Assn. of Otolaryngology, owns a small stake less than 5% in Arches Natural Products, the company that produces Tinnitus Relief Formula.

Seidman says he recommended Tinnitus Relief Formula to his patients long before he had any connection with the company. By his estimation, about four or five patients out of 100 who try the product say that their ringing disappears completely. More than half want to keep taking the formula even though they aren't sure how well it's working, if at all. He advises a four-month trial of the tinnitus combo pack. "If it isn't helping by then, you should stop spending your money. It's probably not going to work."

William Martin, professor of otolaryngology-head neck surgery and director of the Tinnitus Clinic at the Oregon Health & Science University in Portland, says that there are still huge gaps in the science surrounding tinnitus. But for now, he says, there's no good evidence that any supplement helps. Martin notes that tinnitus supplements tend to come with the disclaimer that they are "not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease."

"I think that says it all," Martin says.

COMMENTS FROM READERS:

ddrasin says:

<< the National Center for Complementary and Alternative Medicine notes that the homeopathic approach to medicine is "controversial" because its "key concepts are not consistent with established laws of science." >>

That may be true, but controversy doesn't necessarily equal ineffectiveness.

Almost everything we now take for granted was once "controversial," including many of the foundations of modern medicine. Science doesn't stand still; if it did, we'd still be adhering to Newton's 17th-century worldview and practicing 17th-century medicine. Let's not forget that the laws of *science* are not the laws of *nature* -- they're simply descriptions, and incomplete ones at that. (If they were complete, science would pretty much grind to a halt.)

Homeopathy isn't a panacea, but its proven effectiveness in veterinary and pediatric medicine suggests that it's not necessarily the "mere placebo" it's often made out to be. So if it doesn't work in all cases, we need to find out *why* instead of the throwing the baby out with the bathwater.

I hasten to add here that I'm not defending homeopathy so much as decrying the double scientific standards that often prevail at the margins of accepted practice -- usually where unpatentable remedies are concerned

Posted: May 15, 2010 6:11PM EDT joey20 says:

I too have had tinnitus for about 25 years due to use
of lawn mowers almost every day and vacumn cleaners
in closed hallways everyday. Right now there are three
different sounds I can hear. I notice that when I go
to the bathroom and strain that it increases the volume. Leads me to think it may a circulation thing
also. Tried lipo-flvonoid one time and thought my head
was going to explode. I can count my heartbeat without
taking my pulse. I dread the summer storm season as when the storm sirens go off I also have them going off in my head for at least three days before they subside.Hearing is a problem but don't know how much is because of the noise or if my hearing is really bad.
I do use a lot of garlic. Not always raw though.

Posted: April 15, 2010 12:53PM EDT jankoj says:

I have tinnitus for over 25 years , tried pretty much everything on market and no relieve.
The worst offender in my case is vitamin E , it took me a while to figure it out so if I stay away from any form of E vitamin my tinnitus is much better .Don't forget that E vitamin is also used as preservative in many types of supplements and creams. Another culprits are aspirin, coffee , any type of stimulants and stress of any kind.
The best thing to calm tinnitus down in my case is a lot of raw garlic and peace of mind.
I've mentioned E vitamin on many tinnitus forums but nobody payed attention.
Give it a shot and you'll be surprised.
Jan

ghp925 says:

I have been using lipo-flavonoid on and off for quite a few months. I have experienced a definite improvement when used. I stopped for a while & the noise increased considerably. I am back using it again with some success. I have a very bad case of tinnitus. Sometimes it is overpowering. I have some hearing loss & this increases the problem. Maybe people do not believe this works but for me it does. I never completely lose the problem completely but any help is welcome. Helene

Posted: April 12, 2010 2:36PM EDT krussbach says:

Author of this Article:
Last sentence of first paragraph one would be much easier to use with commas inserted, appropriately.
Thank you for your consideration with this issue, respectively.
Kevin

Posted: April 12, 2010 1:57PM EDT ECastell says:

All homeopathic and holistic "remedies" are required by the FDA to carry the disclaimer that they are "not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease." If truth in advertising was truly required across the board, many pharmaceuticals would also have to carry that disclaimer. The disclaimer does not mean a product cannot accomplish the result intended -- it's just another way that government protects big pharma.


Posted: April 12, 2010 12:31PM EDT organicwench says:

I have had tinnitus off and on, but very mildly. Usually lasting only for a few seconds. What I have had trouble with is the vertigo that sometimes accompanies the ringing in the ears. I have had SEVERE vertigo for years. I used to take niacin for it then one day about 26 years ago I went into a health food store and the clerk recommended ginkgo. The ginkgo worked incredibly well, much better than the niacin. I have been using it ever since. I take 120mg in the morning and 120mg in the evening. I have run out of it a couple of times, and the vertigo returned. As long as I take the ginkgo I am fine. However, there is no need to spend a lot of money on this product. Two of the brands I like are Nature's Answer and Jarrow, both of which are standarized. They can be affordably purchased from vitacost.com or iherb.com

Posted: April 12, 2010 11:19AM EDT Shevie says:

They don't know what causes it and they don't know how to treat it, but they DO know what doesn't work? Of course, the things outside the realm of the AMA don't work. Never have, never will. Just ask the AMA.

Frankly, before I spent a small fortune on surgery that doesn't work, masking devices that hide the sound with another sound, or cognitive behavioral therapy that teaches you to live with it, I'd give homeopathic treatments such as those mentioned a shot.

BTW, I've had tinnitus for over a decade and it really isn't bothersome except when it wakes me up

[link to www.drweil.com]
Try this!


Most tinnitus is due to damage to the microscopic endings of the hearing nerve in the inner ear, commonly from exposure to loud noise. Other causes include allergy, high or low blood pressure, a tumor, diabetes, thyroid problems, a head or neck injury. Some drugs including anti-inflammatories, antibiotics, sedatives, antidepressants and aspirin can cause tinnitus. If this is the case, changing drugs or lowering the dosage usually takes care of the problem.

Recent research also found that a specific area of the brain involved in tinnitus that affects only one ear. Using positron-emission tomograph (PET), researchers at the State University of New York in Buffalo were able to detect changes in the auditory cortex, the part of the brain that processes sound, on the opposite side of the brain from the tinnitus. The researchers said that this suggests that tinnitus may be initiated by brain activity rather than by the ear.
advertisement

As far as treatment is concerned, I've seen no evidence suggesting that NAC (N-acetyl-L-cysteine) is effective for tinnitus. I recommend trying ginkgo, two tablets of standardized extract three times a day with meals. Ginkgo may help by increasing blood circulation in the head and neck. Give it at least a two months trial.

My colleague, naturopathic physician Judy Hutt, NMD sends her patients to an osteopathic physician experienced in craniosacral therapy, a gently manipulative technique for the bones in the head. She says this seems to take the pressure off the auditory nerves. She also has found that reducing blood pressure via weight loss can help.

In addition, you can try these self-help steps suggested by the American Academy of Otolaryngology-Head and Neck Surgery:

* Avoid exposure to loud sounds and noises.
* Lower your salt intake (salt impairs blood circulation).
* Avoid stimulants such as coffee, tea, cola and tobacco.
* Exercise daily.
* Get adequate rest; avoid fatigue.

To all of that, I would add that you try not to worry about your tinnitus. You might want to investigate tinnitus retraining therapy with otolaryngologists (ear, nose and throat specialists) or audiologists who can help you learn to cope better with the disorder. And because stress can worsen tinnitus, practice breathing exercises or other relaxation techniques.

Andrew Weil, M.D.

Relax and it will become less and less of an issue.

Here is a theory from me on this.

We are all vibrating in frequencies, everything including this planet. When we are not vibrating at the correct hz for synchronization we hear loud ringing in the ears. Once we have settled into a more harmonic state with our surroundings we achieve a frequency balance and the "ringing" seems to go away on it's own. Truly more of us becoming properly "tuned" into our desired vibrations lately and why so many report this phenom now.


Sounds like a line of shit if I ever heard one much less wrote one, so this must be a fact.

CMV and just about any of the group of herpes viruses (including HHVs, Shingles, EBV) and other viral infections can cause hypersensitivity to radio signals and EMFs

Try turning off AND unplugging all radios, TVs, cell phones, any other electrical devices (especially fluorescent lights) in your home, get away from your refrigerator, washer & dryer.

THEN get into a dark environment.

Now if you don't experience "hearing" the noise, or if you hear anything, be aware of where you are and anything electrical near you.

acyclovir/valacyclovir (Valtrex)(antiviral drugs) are used to treat the infection, which you will likely test negative for an active infection, unless a doctor checks your CSF, or if it is active in the bloodstream when you are tested. Any "past positive" that shows you have had an infection (via antibodies in the blood) means it may reactivate or be active and test negative, thus a negative active test means you may be prone to reinfection. Many people have infections with none of these symptoms, others have far worse symptoms.

Docs generally treat CMV or about 10 days with high doses of the antiviral drugs above. If the symptoms go away or decrease with treatment, you'll have a pretty good idea that you have a viral infection that is affecting you. Unfortunately, stress (mental or physical) can make it return, and sometimes these viral infections can return on their own.

I'd talk to your doctor, ask for a Valtrex prescription and see if it doesn't help.

Also if your house and/or apartment &/or workplace has a lot of electrical wires and thus EM interference, this can also affect many people. The places in the body the infection affects has a huge effect on how the viral infection will affect you. The "static" feeling you have is likely an "aura" or pre-seizure or near your seizure threshold state.If viral, as I suspect, you should have a normal or fairly normal EEG, even with strobes, yet it may or may not affect how you feel.

About 70 -80% of the population has an infection in this group that has the potential to create these "symptoms", but a far smaller percentage have it affect these sensitivities.

Best of luck! Please get this treated. Long-term infections such as these can lead to night sweats, feeling feverish when you are not, visual and hearing disturbances or loss of sight &/or hearing, restless legs syndrome and similar movement disorders, such as dystonia, seizures and other major neurological problems, even death.

Please see a good neurologist, immunologist, infectious disease specialist or even a knowledgeable GP.

With this set of diseases on the rise, you'd think GPs would know what this is right away. Unfortunately this generally isn't the case. Many still see this as "rare", which to this degree it used to be. Not so any more.

At the office I work with, patients are given a full lab work-up, history, then are treated quickly. Some who have waited for treatment before we've seen them have had some permanent health problems.

Please find a doctor with familiarity with viral infectious diseases and get treated. My guess is you are having other symptoms you aren't even aware of that have become "normal"to you. Time for a work-up, labs and treatment.

Please see your health care professional. If you can't find a doctor near you to test for or treat this, go to your nearest large university's medical department. Read about these conditions on-line and educate yourself about the symptoms before seeing your health care professional, as they'll hear about the first sentence and a half you say then nothing more. Typical for many clinic and HMO-style doctors.

God bless and good luck with this.

just the Gov sending out scans/frequencies/and experimental resonating frequencies. also- magnetic anomalies and earthquakes etc.. various reasons. your just sensitive to it like many others..

Keep away from electric blankets, wifi signals,check your wifi adapter is not permanently on if you have a laptop, mains cables, your computer, put a steel stake in the ground and wire it to your wrist at night so you are earthed out.Throw your TV out.
Buy yourself a Ghost meter from e bay and check for all faint emf signals passing through your home especially in the vicinity of your bed.
Wrap a wet tourniqeu / towel around your head often. Get lots of showers.
Last thing at night, immerse your feet in salt water as you say a prayer to God. Be persistent.
Shake your head violently - and see if you can knock this thing out of sync.
Go for long walks. Ground yourself in the countryside.
If it is what I went through then you are in real trouble truthofpsychosis.com
DO not contact a Psychologist for a noise in the head or you will be condemned. If demons exists ( and I know they do, don't ask how ),then they operate metaphysically using emf, earth's magnetic field and any electrical appliances in your vicinity. Straighten your life out with God and if it does not go, you then have the option of doing what I did and packing your luggage to leave and go to live elsewhere. The worst thing you can do is nothing. God Bless.
truthofpsychosis.com

most likely you can't believe THIS,but once you accept IT,it can't bother you and it will go away.

meanwhile,if you're not hypertensive--
www.watercure2.org
and common sense
rest,diversion
basic vitiamins of a decent quality--balanced Bcomplex/c and pantothenic acid--

it's baaaaaack with me right now,right ear ,sounds like a ground hum /prop plane idling
and trying to kick my arse and I won't ALLOW IT.

will start what i just told you to do in the AM.

Tinnitus. I have it. Not the loud ringing that some people get but more a high pitched hissing. Mine started off as intermittent but is now constant.

If it lasts that long and is annoying, it's probably tinnitus. But I read a book by Doreen Virtue that says this is how angels speak to you because they are a very high frequency.
"You may also hear a high-pitched ringing sound in one ear, which is the sound of the angels downloading helpful information and energy. If the ringing sound is annoying, ask the angels to turn down the volume."
[link to www.themessenger.info]

Mayby invisible UFO.

I think some people are just more sensitive to certain sounds and OP possibly you are just hearing what others said, the waves from all the tech in our world now.

I have the same high frequency sound effecting me here in Cairo. I have been living in a building that is 70 meters away from a Mobile Base station for now 8 years. From last December I started hearing this high frequency pitch and a low hum. I had found out that these Microwave Base Stations have been upgraded for digital transmissions just recently so as to comply to the 3G+ and 4G technologies that are recently being introduced on the market. Meaning these digital RF electric emissions are modulated pulses. I made an official complaint and now the low hum sound which is the carrier wave has gone,..but the high pitch is still there. I made another complaint and had 4 days relaxing with no high pitch sounds. Then it started again,.but with vigor,..as if the Mobile Provider just got fed up and needed the amplitude so as to keep business going. What is strange is that there are peak hours during the day,.the worst is in early morning such as 4:00 AM when the pitch is loud enough to wake one out of their sleep. Creating lethargy and weakness. All neighbors feel have the symptoms; broken sleep, headaches, dizziness, and depression. We have 4 cases of fatal illnesses these 3 past years; breast cancer, tumors, immune deficiency due to blood disorders, heart palpitations, and chronic arthritis.

I am the only one who hears these high pitches, as if I am some kind of geiger counter. I know that it is RF emissions from the Base Station since as I travel further away the frequency pitch gets less. It is nearly impossible to run away from these radiant waves since just the past 6 month these Microwave Base Stations have been installed nearly every were in the country. Also this high frequency E pitch is an electric sound,..I know that it is propogated from thses Base Stations.

Best of Health to all,..may GOD protect us from these Pharisees who will micro radiate our biosphere to extinction.

I have the same high frequency sound effecting me here in Cairo. I have been living in a building that is 70 meters away from a Mobile Base station for now 8 years. From last December I started hearing this high frequency pitch and a low hum. I had found out that these Microwave Base Stations have been upgraded for digital transmissions just recently so as to comply to the 3G+ and 4G technologies that are recently being introduced on the market. Meaning these digital RF electric emissions are modulated pulses. I made an official complaint and now the low hum sound which is the carrier wave has gone,..but the high pitch is still there. I made another complaint and had 4 days relaxing with no high pitch sounds. Then it started again,.but with vigor,..as if the Mobile Provider just got fed up and needed the amplitude so as to keep business going. What is strange is that there are peak hours during the day,.the worst is in early morning such as 4:00 AM when the pitch is loud enough to wake one out of their sleep. Creating lethargy and weakness. All neighbors feel have the symptoms; broken sleep, headaches, dizziness, and depression. We have 4 cases of fatal illnesses these 3 past years; breast cancer, tumors, immune deficiency due to blood disorders, heart palpitations, and chronic arthritis.

I am the only one who hears these high pitches, as if I am some kind of geiger counter. I know that it is RF emissions from the Base Station since as I travel further away the frequency pitch gets less. It is nearly impossible to run away from these radiant waves since just the past 6 month these Microwave Base Stations have been installed nearly every were in the country. Also this high frequency E pitch is an electric sound,..I know that it is propogated from thses Base Stations.

Best of Health to all,..may GOD protect us from these Pharisees who will micro radiate our biosphere to extinction.

This happens to me when a train goes by....even at a distance of many miles it happens. My head blocks up like I'm on an airplane and a high pitched noise happens it what sounds like the "inside of my skull".

In fact, Amtrak just went by my office and it happened!

I've been experiencing the same thing recently. started off low for me and just yesterday, theres been a high pitch sound. could not sleep at all and i was scared, still am. I dont want to fall asleep when i cant keep my eyes open no more. i want to sleep in peace without a extremely high pitch sound.

its like its in my ear and at the back right side of my head. also in the right ear.

SOMEONE PLEASE DO HAVE THE ANSWER TO THIS WITHOUT SAYING ITS GOD TRYING TO TALK TO ME OR IS WATCHING ME. I NEED A SCIENTIFIC ANSWER. I BELIEVE IN GOD BUT IF GOD WANTS TO CONTACT ME, IT WOULDN'T BE THIS MISLEADING.

It was like torture last night and its starting to pick up right now.

Hey I hear it also, I do not think it is something physical. When I block my ears it is still present. So it is not something on the exterior.

I do not know what to do with this sound. I meditate. All I hear is this. It does not make sense.

Life is hell

I'll start with a couple of short stories that illustrate perceptual variances between individuals.

While browsing through a Dolgins department store one day, I entered the TV display room in the electronics section.
As I rounded the corner and took a few steps into the room I was nearly brought to my knees by a noise so loud, and so piercing as to cause me physical discomfort. It was an extremely high pitched oscillating whine that I found quite intolerable. As I made my hasty retreat from the room, I noticed something even stranger to me then the noise. It was the two men standing in the middle of the room nonchalantly having a conversation. How the heck were these guys able to loiter in this room I could not even enter? I can only conclude that they were unaware of the noise because they didn't percieve it.

Another example is a table full of people at my friends house who were unable to hear the oscillation of the filaments in the incandescent bulbs of the dining room light fixture being fed by a variable dimmer. It was driving me nuts, so I asked if anybody else could hear it. "I don't hear anything" was the general consensus. I eventually walked over and turned up the dimmer until the sound went away. I didn't let the odd glances from my buddies put me off.

My 19" Acer Flat Panel monitor also emits a similar noise, even when it is turned off. It is the same noise my LG Flat Screen TV makes. Though this noise is not always percievable unless I tilt my head in just the right manner.

I have been hearing the mystery "noise" for over 10 years now. At first I found the noise to be directional, and I could block the signal using an old DSS Dish. I simply held the parabolic reflector up in front of my face and turned slowly until the noise stopped. It was interesting to note that the noise came from different directions at different times.
At some point the noise became omni-directional, and I can no longer block the signal effectively.

I will briefly describe the noise/signal as I hear it.
An extremely high pitched base carrier wave containing multiple oscillating channels.

Characteristics of the noise/signal:
Occasional (becoming less frequent) "Drop outs". Usually short in duration. Longer "drop outs" during prolonged wide-spread power outtages. "Drop outs" in remote areas (I am finding less of these places).
Also, there is what is best described as "Channel switching". Like a "drop out" of very short duration but with the added characteristic of a tonal change/variance in the signal.

It is my personal opinion that this mystery noise is man made and propagated purposely.
I can only speculate on the purpose.

The noise is real, and for those that can percieve it....you are not alone.

Who's High-Pitch?

My bad for repeatedly misspelling the word perceive.
How'd that go again, i before eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee except after c?
Thought I'd make a joke of too, hope some of you get it.

This is some crazy shit right here. I admit to being slightly skeptical; I also confess to find it perfectly rational and believable. That last bit on it being man made was an added thinking marker. Let's just say if that were true and became public, it would be received in a surreal and horrific way.