HELP!!! I'm Starting to HATE my Step Kids!!!!!

i hope she got served up a nice fat divorce. bitch!

Thats funny because in todays world simple discipline is child abuse.

But it usually works.

It's probably not child abuse as long as food is available, esp. if stepmom is ill. And there's no physical abuse. Don't do that, then the law will be against you.

There could be a custody issue going on here -- if the house isn't maintained at a certain level, OP and her hubby lose the amount of custody they have. That could be a source of pressure. The kids already spend most of their time with their "real" mother, so OP really has no chance.

Don't sweat it. They are not your kids, don't try to change it. Do what they cannot do for themselves and make them do the rest -- and that should be just about everything. They are pretty old now, and the 15 year old can supervise the younger one.

My advice: Don't spend much time at home. Start traveling and spending time away. Bide your time, they'll be gone soon enough. And when they head to college pack up, sell the house, and move far away.

Also, don't buy a lot of food they can cook and discourage them from doing so. Say it's because you heard about some teen kid starting a kitchen fire. Tell them to use the pre-packaged stuff you buy instead.

You are stressing way too much over what's going on. Just suck it up because it's only something temporary you have to put up with. Lean heavily on your husband for help and explain you are sick and you need him to step up and help you clean the messes, etc. These kids are formed and you won't change them. It's not worth constant fighting, war and tension in the house. Keep telling yourself, they'll be gone eventually.

Accept them, place a distance between you and them, and like I said...bide your time. Keep thinking how nice it will be when it's just you and hubby.

Oh...and by the way soon both will be driving and will spend the majority of their time hanging w/ friends, part-time job, girlfriends and won't have time for you anyway. That's what teens do.

lol...didn't realize it was so old. My advice still stands. Hopefully she took it and the kids have one foot out the door by now and hubby stepped up to the plate.

One day they will have their own kids and will raise them similarly and be miserable at home too. Then she can sit back and grin.

Yeah, classic parental alienation syndrome. "Poisoned kids." The divorce is not what gets the kids, it's this lethal poison injected daily by whichever parent is resentful of the divorce.

I'm still here and still married! We are doing much better. My Husband and I went to counseling. He has started to put boundaries in place and rules for his kids.

The oldest one left for college this year.

So suck it!

I feel for you. I have a step son that is 13. I have been with him and his mom for most of his life. He is getting worse as the time goes by. ALL the problems yo are experiencing sounds like you're talking about mine...exactly. His mother tells him stuff but doesn't follow through until she's had it and then throws a tantrum. He does it and then goes back to his usual ways. His mom has changed too over the years and not for the better. Anyway, I've tried talking to him, explaining things to him, asking him if he had any problems or comments about what I said or want. I told him to speak freely without anything coming back to haunt him for voicing his opinion. I try getting involved with things he likes. I have punished him for bad behavior and rewarded him for good behavior. I've taken away hi TV, computer, games, etc....he simply goes without and goes to bed. I think the two of us should dump ourother halves and run away together, lol. These last two posts have nerve putting you down. Must be nice that they have such "perfect" step kids! If they don't then they should shut the hell up!

Timothy 3:1-5

3 But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty.
2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive,
disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 heartless, unappeasable,
slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, 4 treacherous, reckless,
swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God,
5 having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power.

Avoid such people.

I am not trying to be mean here, but it is apparent that you might need to take something for anxiety. I would go to a free clinic, or to the regular doc and get something for anxiety, that has a calming effect. When your body undergoes high stress, such as loud noises repeatedly and often, kids will often get on your last nerve. I have severe anxiety, with very noisy kids, and I can vouch personally, if I don't take something, they will get on my last nerve. It isn't that they are doing anything not normal,it is that your threshold for noise, and stress is lower than it should be. I can promise you that no matter how "bad" they may seem, your ability to cope with it will become alot easier if you take something for anxiety. There are many good kinds that won't make you feel weird, just relaxed and calm. Don't take zoloft though, it tends to make you feel agitated.