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Military Contractor working on CORPSE EATING ROBOTS!

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Gaius Germaincus
User ID: 714934

United States
7/15/2009 2:02 PM

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Military Contractor working on CORPSE EATING ROBOTS!

Quote

[link to www.huffingtonpost.com]

I mean, seriously, WTF?!

From the article:

It's not everyday that a person gets to blog about how military contractors are developing terrifying, ironically named robots, which will roam around, feasting on dead flesh until the day comes that they will rise up and kill us all, but guess what? Today is one of those days:

A Maryland company under contract to the Pentagon is working on a steam-powered robot that would fuel itself by gobbling up whatever organic material it can find -- grass, wood, old furniture, even dead bodies.

Robotic Technology Inc.'s Energetically Autonomous Tactical Robot -- that's right, "EATR" -- "can find, ingest, and extract energy from biomass in the environment (and other organically-based energy sources), as well as use conventional and alternative fuels (such as gasoline, heavy fuel, kerosene, diesel, propane, coal, cooking oil, and solar) when suitable," reads the company's Web site.

That "biomass" and "other organically-based energy sources" wouldn't necessarily be limited to plant material -- animal and human corpses contain plenty of energy, and they'd be plentiful in a war zone.

You know, my editors frown on me for swearing, for good reason, but in this case: SERIOUSLY, PENTAGON, WHAT THE FUCK?!?

I am having a really hard time trying to figure out what the military purpose of a robot that eats dead bodies is. Maybe the idea is these robots will make it difficult for independent observers to quantify casualties? Maybe President Sarah Palin will nominate one to the Supreme Court? The article states that EATR is a "platform" that things could be "built upon" -- like an "ambulance" or a "mobile gunship." But it seems to me that the ambulances and gunships we have now are perfectly okay, and, at any rate, DON'T MAKE MY SOUL HURT.

Speaking of:

The advantages to the military are that the robot would be extremely flexible in fuel sources and could roam on its own for months, even years, without having to be refueled or serviced.
So then: some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice. But it looks like it's going to end in a hail of white-hot terror at the hands of marauding, corpse-eating Roombas.

Last Edited by Gaius Germaincus on 7/15/2009 at 2:03 PM

Utinam populus Romanus unam cervicem haberet!

Gaius Germaincus
User ID: 714934

United States
7/15/2009 2:09 PM

Re: Military Contractor working on CORPSE EATING ROBOTS!	Quote
Self powered and propelled people eating machines not doomy enough for GLP today. lol. Utinam populus Romanus unam cervicem haberet!

Gaius Germaincus
User ID: 714934

United States
7/15/2009 2:26 PM

Re: Military Contractor working on CORPSE EATING ROBOTS!	Quote
More details from the company itself: [link to www.robotictechnologyinc.com] [link to www.robotictechnologyinc.com] Utinam populus Romanus unam cervicem haberet!

Anonymous Coward
User ID: 513247

Canada
7/15/2009 2:40 PM

Re: Military Contractor working on CORPSE EATING ROBOTS!	Quote
I wonder what is a robot stomach capacity in terms of corpses... corpse eating robots... This site is getting dumber each day.

Babe in a Bunker Subscriber

The Sixth Witness
User ID: 707525

United States
7/15/2009 2:41 PM

Re: Military Contractor working on CORPSE EATING ROBOTS!	Quote
Yeah, that's going to work out well... You got it bad lover, no, you got it good. You saw the sun like you knew that you would... in spite of my confusion, up above all my pain I gotta death-grip on this vision, here we go again... ******************** Kick my ass: [link to biab1973.mybrute.com]

Gaius Germaincus
User ID: 714934

United States
7/15/2009 2:48 PM

Re: Military Contractor working on CORPSE EATING ROBOTS!	Quote
We got the "packmule" and that softee one coming out of thre heating vent and the automated targeting cannon as discussed on the Boston Dynamics thread. Now this. [link to www.godlikeproductions.com] Last Edited by Gaius Germaincus on 7/15/2009 at 2:50 PM Utinam populus Romanus unam cervicem haberet!

Anonymous Coward
User ID: 648063

United States
7/15/2009 2:54 PM

Re: Military Contractor working on CORPSE EATING ROBOTS!	Quote
Don't forget the other military robot "Big Dog" Maybe they will retro-fit this nightmare to it.

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