Recession Proof GLP: Canning Vegtables, Meats/Cheeses & Other Foods | |
Phennommennonn (OP) Forum Administrator User ID: 759510 United States 08/30/2009 10:18 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Check out this web site: dehydrate2store.com Quoting: Anonymous Coward 379028Dehydration is also an excellent way to preserve food. This web site is excellent in that this woman tells you how from start to finish. Shelf life is increased by years!!! i will post what i dry in the dehydrator in a little bit im crackin the whip around here right now political correctness is a doctrine.... fostered by a delusional, illogical minority...... and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media; which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end. |
Phennommennonn (OP) Forum Administrator User ID: 759510 United States 08/30/2009 10:29 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | heres my jerky recipe i use the dehydrator with the heat fans not coils. i use deer meat and pork loin, can use turkey or chicken too slice meat thinly and slice while frozen its easier to work with in a large bowl place the meat add to meat one bottle a-1 steak sauce 1 bottle Worcestershire sauce 1 bottle sweet baby rays BBQ sauce **if you feel brave add 1/4 cup of louisiana hot sauce or 3 tablespoons of daves insanity sauce spoon thru to cover all meat cover and place in frig over night. next day, begin laying meat on drying racks salt tops, garlic tops, pepper tops *i add hot pepper seeds to the tops also let dry - rotate racks if nec when done, vacuum seal the jerky. political correctness is a doctrine.... fostered by a delusional, illogical minority...... and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media; which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end. |
malu User ID: 593162 United States 08/30/2009 10:32 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Community canning centers during WWII and today The "Of Course I Can" poster was created by the U.S. War Food Administration in 1944 as part of the nationwide victory garden program. Victory gardens made an important contribution to the home-front effort by producing a significant amount of food (approximately 40 percent of the vegetables consumed in 1943) and by providing a way to contribute to the war effort for those who could not fight on the battlefield. The book "Eating for Victory: Food Rationing and the Politics of Domesticity" by Amy Bentley contains a chapter examining victory gardening and canning during the war, gender politics, and how the nation responded to the call to do their part in the war by gardening and canning. [link to www.eatlocalchallenge.com] "By way of deception, thou shalt do war." Israel's Mossad "The truth shall set you free." U.S. Central Intelligence Agency Motto |
Phennommennonn (OP) Forum Administrator User ID: 759510 United States 08/30/2009 10:37 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | for canning STEP ONE: Choose your pumpkin (this is a homegrown QLD blue) Pumpkin Soup 2 Tbsp butter (for sautéing) 1 large onion, chopped 2 shallots, chopped 2 medium sized potatoes, peeled and cubed 6 cups cubed pumpkin 8 cups chicken or vegetable broth 1/2 tsp ground cumin pinch of nutmeg salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste Note: Makes: 6-7 pints STEP TWO: Cut pumpkin in cubes Cut small enough to fit into your jars. Approx 7 cups shown - recipe says for 6 cups. STEP THREE: Cut up potatoes 2 medium sized potatoes. STEP FOUR: Chop onions and shallots I used my stick blender chopper to chop the onions and sliced up homegrown shallots (green onions). STEP FIVE: Add spices I added the cumin and pepper to the onion and shallots and then sautéd in butter together. Note: Recipe also shows nutmeg STEP SIX: Add all the ingredients together Bring all the ingredients together and bring to the boil then simmer it for 5 mins to make sure the pumpkin and other vegetables are real hot. Note: Do not puree the pumpkin/vegetables until just before reheating to eat. Pureed pumpkin is too thick to safely process. STEP SEVEN: Divide into jars Using a slotted ladle to put it into steralised jars, trying to ensure all have some potato and onion. Leave enough room for broth to be added. STEP EIGHT: Ladle broth into jars - leaving 1" headspace Once I have the vegetables in the jars, ladle the broth mixture into the prepared jars leaving a 1" headspce. Use a spatula to ensure there are no air bubbles. Note: Photo shows headspace measure, read about 'why is headspace so important' STEP NINE: Process in Canner Process pints for 60 minutes and quarts for 80 minutes at 10 lb pressure. Adjust pressure according to altitude and type of pressure canner. Note: Photo shows all jars after processing STEP TEN: On opening - Blend contents When a jar is opened, either blend or 'whizz' up the contents, I use a stick blender. We like it more runny so I also added half a pint (using the same jar) or water, or you could use stock. STEP ELEVEN: Serve I like lots of pepper, you could stir in a spoonful of cream or sour cream or chopped chives to decorate. political correctness is a doctrine.... fostered by a delusional, illogical minority...... and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media; which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end. |
neteru<> User ID: 757570 United States 08/30/2009 10:43 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | while you are at it, please feel free to copy and paste all of Atlas Shrugged k thx OP We have finally come back to the pre-Socratic philosopher Heraclitus, who said everything is flow, flux, process. There are no "things." Bruce Lee |
Phennommennonn (OP) Forum Administrator User ID: 759510 United States 08/30/2009 10:49 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | while you are at it, please feel free to copy and paste all of Atlas Shrugged k thx OP Quoting: neteru<>Member ID 42922 Joined On 2009-08-05 :fu222222: Last Edited by Phennommennonn on 08/30/2009 10:50 AM political correctness is a doctrine.... fostered by a delusional, illogical minority...... and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media; which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end. |
TVZ User ID: 578416 United States 08/30/2009 10:49 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 759526 Canada 08/30/2009 10:52 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Bread and Butter Pickles Better Homes and Gardens Cookbook Makes 7 pints 4 quarts sliced medium cucumbers 8 medium while onions, sliced 1/2 cup pickling salt 3 cloves garlic, halved cracked ice 4 cups sugar 3 cups cider vinegar 2 tablespoons mustard seeds 1 1/2 teaspoons ground turmeric 1 1/2 teaspoons celery seeds 1. In 6 to 8-quart stainless-steel, enamel or nonstick kettle, combine cucumbers, onion, pickling salt and garlic. Add 2 inches of cracked ice. Cover with lid and chill for 3 to 12 hours. 2. Remove any remaining ice. Drain mixture well in large collander. Remove garlic. 3. In the kettle, combine sugar, vinegar, mustard seeds, turmeric and celery seeds. Heat to boiling. Add cucumber/onion mixture. Return to boiling. 4. Pack mixture and liquid into hot sterilized pint canning jars, leaving 1/2-inch headspace. Wipe jar rims; adjust lids. Process in boiling water canner for 10 minutes. Remove jars; cool on racks. Pickled Beets Rodale--Preserving Summer's Bounty Makes 9 pints 1 gallon small beets with roots and 2-inch stems 2 tablespoons whole allspice 2 sticks cinnamon, 2 inches long 1 1/2 quarts vinegar 1/2 cup honey 1. Cook beets in water to cover. When tender, dip beets in cold water, and slip off skins. Slice thickly or cut in quarters. 2. Put beets in a large enamel or stainless steel pot. Combine allspice, cinnamon and vinegar in a medium bowl, pour over the beets and bring to a boil. Add honey. 3. Pack beets into scaled pint jars. Cover with boiling syrup, leaving 1/2 inch headspace. Seal and process for 30 minutes in boiling water canner. Both these pickles and beets are excellent. Preparation is much easier if you have a mandolin. |
Grendelmort User ID: 733135 United States 08/30/2009 10:58 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 511879 United States 08/30/2009 10:58 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | |
Pondergirl User ID: 759531 United States 08/30/2009 11:00 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Do you have a canning recipe for green boiled peanuts ??? We grow our own peanuts -- right now I just boil them and put them in the freezer. I am almost out of freezer space and was wondering about packing them in canning jars. I contacted Ball but they did not have any instructions other than the freeze method. BTW -- Thanks for this thread ... it is super ... I'm new to canning also ... on my second year. I love it. Ponder That Will Ya ... |
Savannah Banana....... User ID: 646678 United Arab Emirates 08/30/2009 11:08 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | There is nothing as good as wild grape jelly. Like I told Dajavoo the other day, I canned 35 pints a few days ago. There are wild grapes everywhere and there is a ton of them this year. You just have to look around. We picked about 25 pounds next to the post office. Most people don't like wild grapes because.....like my kids said.....they have seeds in them...... They make the best jelly I have ever had. Grape jelly is the easiest jelly you can make. Jelly in the stores is 2/3 water. My jelly is almost all true grape juice. I used to make historic Savannah jelly...crab apples from river street and wild grapes. Well...they cut down all the crab apple trees and I can't find any now, so I just make grape jelly. . |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 715924 United States 08/30/2009 11:23 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Question for you OP -- Quoting: PondergirlDo you have a canning recipe for green boiled peanuts ??? We grow our own peanuts -- right now I just boil them and put them in the freezer. I am almost out of freezer space and was wondering about packing them in canning jars. I contacted Ball but they did not have any instructions other than the freeze method. BTW -- Thanks for this thread ... it is super ... I'm new to canning also ... on my second year. I love it. I'm not the op, but she seems busy and may not mind my contribution. I canned peanuts once. Since I'm in Ohio and it's rare to get raw peanuts, I don't know your definition of "green boiled peanuts". The ones I got were dry, if that's any help. Still eating them, so haven't done it recently, but as I remember, I boiled the peanuts for quite a while. An hr. and a half maybe? They weren't yet soft, but had a good start on cooking them. I then put salt in the bottom of the jar. Can't remember the amount, but probably a T. or more in a qt. jar.. Then, I put the hot peanuts in the jar, covered with boiling water, and processed according to meat directions in the Ball Blue Book. Sorry this is vague, but I didn't have a recipe and am going from memory. The peanuts are very good. I make sure to bring them to a rolling boil for a few minutes before eating. |
Foxx. User ID: 719817 United States 08/30/2009 11:28 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | We are in the NorthEast here and are very fortunate as far as the yield from our garden: We have canned 40 quarts and 20 Pints of Tomatoes so far with more to come still. Also 25 Pints of Salsa. Many in our neck of the woods have not had a yield of Tomatoes for the past two years, if they get any "fruit" at all it isnt ripening. I believe we will be getting a early frost as it is really cold at nights now, too cold for this time of year really. Here is my Basic Salsa Recipie; 4c. Chopped Tomatoes 2c. Chopped Bell Peppers (any color) 1C. Chopped Hot Peppers -Seeds reserved 3/4C. Chopped Onion 1 1/2 Tsp. Salt 2Cloves Garlic 1/2C. White Vinegar 1/4C. Sugar 12oz. Tomatoe Paste Combine all ingriediants, except for paste, Bring to a rolling Boil. Simmer for 10 minutes, Taste for hotness, add seeds as per taste. Add paste simmer for 20 minutes to an hour (simmering longer will thicken the Salsa). You are the driver, you Own the Road!!Stand up and Shout I've a suggestion to keep you all occupied, Learn to Swim!! |
Eagle # 1 User ID: 756836 United States 08/30/2009 11:48 AM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | If your NOT married, you SHOULD be getting offers from some suvivalist males, Phennon ! Had no idea your were this 'country wise' . Thought you might be a city girl, with TOO many degrees. GREAT post; JUST in time to change my ingredients for pickles, thank you. Do mine with brown sugar, cider vinegar but no salt. That WILL be corrected this year. Eagle |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 721556 United States 08/30/2009 12:03 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | --5 gallons tomatoes, washed with bad spots removed. --6 or 7 quart canning jars with lids and rings. --Canning salt (any non-iodized salt). --wash jars and rings. Place lids in water in sauce pan and bring to boil while cooking juice. --Put tomatoes through juicer (you can save the pulp for salsa later) --Cook juice in large container on medium to medium high. --Stir every two-three minutes and be sure to skim off any white material that comes to top --very important for good taste. Bring to boil. Let gently boil for one or two minutes. --Place 1 teaspoon of salt in each jar. Pour hot juice into jar and wipe top clean. Dirty top keeps jar from sealing. Apply ring and lid. --Place filled jars upside down for a minute or so, then right side up. --As jars cool you should hear each one pop which means its sealed. If you can push on the lid and it pops up and down after cooling, put it in fridge and use within a week or so because it's not sealed. Made 9 quarts a few days ago. Drank the left over juice and it was sweet and delicious. |
BRIEF AND TO THE POINT User ID: 759296 United States 08/30/2009 12:54 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I've canned so many green beans and cucumbers I won't have to plant them next year. I got to the point where I don't cook and season them I just can them in distilled water using my pressure canner. Working on Tomatoes now. Poor people do poor people things, and rich people do rich people things. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friend, is the beginning of the end of any nation. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it! when you rob Paul to give to Peter ... ... ... you will always get Peters support! :Brieffromnativea: |
zephyr User ID: 2993 United States 08/30/2009 01:12 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | ac 721556 since you have all that tomatoe juice A simple crockpot recipe for spaghetti sauce 1 lb ground beef 1 onion chopped 1 pkg spaghetti sauce mix(dry packet like mccormic) 1 8 oz can tomatoe sauce 3 cups tomatoe juice brown beef with onion, pour all ingredients into crockpot cook an low 3-4 hours my kids love this sauce I cut the ground beef with a hot italian sausage(pork or turkey) I dbl the recipe and use the leftover sauce to make lasagna couple days later. it freezes well. you can get creative with the meat mixture for spicier sauce.. Live and let live.......really |
Phennommennonn (OP) Forum Administrator User ID: 759510 United States 08/30/2009 01:58 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Question for you OP -- Quoting: PondergirlDo you have a canning recipe for green boiled peanuts ??? We grow our own peanuts -- right now I just boil them and put them in the freezer. I am almost out of freezer space and was wondering about packing them in canning jars. I contacted Ball but they did not have any instructions other than the freeze method. BTW -- Thanks for this thread ... it is super ... I'm new to canning also ... on my second year. I love it. no i do not. yours is the first time im hearing about peanuts. political correctness is a doctrine.... fostered by a delusional, illogical minority...... and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media; which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end. |
Phennommennonn (OP) Forum Administrator User ID: 759510 United States 08/30/2009 01:59 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | If your NOT married, you SHOULD be getting offers from some suvivalist males, Phennon ! Quoting: Eagle # 1 756836Had no idea your were this 'country wise' . Thought you might be a city girl, with TOO many degrees. GREAT post; JUST in time to change my ingredients for pickles, thank you. Do mine with brown sugar, cider vinegar but no salt. That WILL be corrected this year. Eagle i will always be a NY and city girl. but i learned a long time ago political correctness is a doctrine.... fostered by a delusional, illogical minority...... and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media; which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end. |
Fishersofmen User ID: 723403 United States 08/30/2009 02:04 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I've been canning tomato juice, freezing squash and beans, and dehydrating just about everything I can get my hands on, the dehydrator lady on youtube is awesome dehydrate2store.com, and she'll teach you everything you want to know and then some, how to dry, store, recipes etc. Hardest thing to dry, blueberries, what a pain. I'm still going to get extra groceries, things to fill in the blanks that I don't have time to can or dry, but I will have a full pantry for this winter, the great 7 year famine cometh, Joseph, make preparations to save your people and all the people's of the land. Last Edited by Fishersofmen on 08/30/2009 02:05 PM The Lord is good. |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 715924 United States 08/30/2009 02:33 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | anyone have a recipe or use for crab apples? Quoting: Fishersofmenthe great 7 year famine cometh, Joseph, make preparations to save your people and all the people's of the land. Here's a link to a crabapple jelly recipe. [link to www.uga.edu] You probably know about crabapples, but the reason the recipe doesn't call for pectin or sure jell, is because crabapples have their own. It would be tempting with many crabapples, to make your own pectin. Here's a recipe for pectin: Ingredients * 2 lb Sliced unpeeled crab apples * 3 c Water Instructions Simmer, stirring for 30 to 40 minutes, adding water as needed. Plop into colander lined with one layer of cheesecloth and set over a bowl; press to force the juices. To clear, heat the collected juice and pour through a stout jelly bag that has been moistened in hot water. The result is the pectin you will use right away, can (1/2" headroom, process 185 F for 15 min), or freeze. Refrigerate after opening. Liquid pectin is especially helpful in making peach, pear, strawberry or other jellies whose fruit is low in pectin. 4-6 tb of homemade pectin for every 1 cup of prepared juice should give a good gel. For tart apple pectin, start with 4 pounds sliced apples with peels & cores and 8 cups of water. Simmer 3 min, press through sieve. Return liquid to heavy kettle and cook briskly, stirring, until volume is reduced by one-half. Clarify and use as above. Source: Putting Food By, 4th edition c. 1988 by Janet C. Greene |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 748723 United States 08/30/2009 02:50 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | I have a canner although I haven't used it yet, still reading up on pros and cons, etc. Truthfully a LITTLE intimidated still, lol. I have been busy this summer though dehydrating vegetables, and storing them in the canning jars! I feed my dogs raw meat along with dehydrated veggies. Right now I have two quarts with approx 12 different vegetables. Something I have made and love, and will be making again next batch of tomatoes that come my way, delicious! After removing skins, I lightly season the tomatoes and cook them down , then run them through the sieve. Put back on stove to make think as tomato paste, then put on Dehydrator tray. Wonderful taste added to salads, tacos, etc, and can be reconstituted to make spaghetti sauce, etc. I also dehydrated a bunch of broccoli that came my way. After dry, I separate the flowers from the stems, and pulverize the stem part, to reconstitute later in chicken broth for brocoli soup. Add flower pieces last along with onions, cheddar cheese and spices. I tried it already, delicious! |
Jdd User ID: 610810 Canada 08/30/2009 02:51 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | PICKLE MAKING Instructions from the 'science guy' on the Food Network: You have to use pure water only – no chlorine! 1 qt. Pure water 5-1/2 oz. pickling salt Large handful of fresh dill Dill seeds A dozen fresh raw cucumbers – medium small size Put all the ingredients into a crock or container, and push a weight on top of the pickles to keep them pushed down into the brine. You can use a ziplok bag full of pure water as the weight (don't use tap water, in case your bag springs a leak). Leave the weight-covered crock in a temperature controlled place that stays 68 to 70 degrees F for 3 full days. You must regulate the temperature so the process works properly. Put the crock into a cooler and add a little ice each day, as needed. Add a thermometer! Every day, go in and skim the whitish scum off the edges, and especially off the cukes. At the end of 3 days, you can take the pickles and brine to cover, and put them into jars in the fridge. Or, you can leave them in the crock, in their brine, for 10 days, and you'll get really sour dill pickles! For faster "fridge pickles", just thin slice the pickles, put them in jars with brine, and in a few days, you'll have pickles. |
Jdd User ID: 610810 Canada 08/30/2009 02:54 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Here are two really excellent books, both available at Amazon: Wild Fermentation: The Flavor, Nutrition, and Craft of Live-Culture Foods - Sandor Ellix Katz Preserving Food without Freezing or Canning: Traditional Techniques Using Salt, Oil, Sugar, Alcohol, Vinegar, Drying, Cold Storage, and Lactic Fermentation - The Gardeners and Farmers of Centre Terre Vivante Wild Fermentation gives you a great education in easy layman's terms on all sorts of fermentation processes that preserve and increase food (health) value of stored foods. And the book on traditional techniques is, I think, really important for the survivalist bookshelf, because it gives you so many alternatives. |
Jdd User ID: 610810 Canada 08/30/2009 02:56 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | The Picklemeister (near the bottom of the page) [link to www.wisementrading.com] Plus a lot of other great equipment for pickling |
Anonymous Coward User ID: 759143 United States 08/30/2009 03:00 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Preserving fresh eggs I've stored fresh laid eggs for several months this way. They are no different than within a day or two of laid, up to about a year later, if protected from temperature fluctuations. As I pull the eggs from the nest daily, I wipe them with a clean paper towel. Since I change the nesting hay regularly, there is rarely any nastiness on the eggs, so they need only be dusted mostly. When they're wiped, I put a little salted butter in the palm of my hand and roll each egg in this being sure to completely coat each egg. In a 5 gallon plastic pail (get these with lids at any hardware store) I lay in a good inch of salt or finely ground oats that have been thoroughly dried in a warm oven. The egg is placed, pointy side down, in this. Leave room between each egg so they don't touch at all. Fill with your packing material to about an inch above the layer of eggs and place next layer, etc. Since I only pack about 8 to 10 eggs a day (use or sell the rest), I lightly cover them as added and 'nestle' in new ones each day. The lids I get are either air tight ones or I add a 'ring' of that thin, dense foam stuff you can buy in sheets for craft projects. This keeps out any moisture from humidity, or the swamp cooler in our case. I can usually pack about 8 dozen eggs to a container, depending on their size. One additional note: I usually set the bucket inside a box that allows a couple of inches all around the bucket. I fill this with just about any kind of 'insulation' I have on hand or want to store... fabrics, packing peanuts or even extra paper towels or small rolls of toilet paper. Add a layer to the bottom, set in the bucket and pack around the sides. Once the bucket is fulled, seal the top, add a layer over it and seal the box. This protects the eggs from freezing or warming in storage. If you want to protect from possible water damage (like can happen when stored in a shed or old barn) put a trash bag in the box first and tie the top good when filled. Box may fall apart when you open it, but the rest will be good to go. Label each box with the date begun and filled so you know which to use first. I used to do just one or two a year for use in winter when the hens aren't laying much. This year, I'm doing more... just in case. I've heard this works for up to two years for using in cooking. I wouldn't know though since I've never tried it. Gramma had something she called an egg box that she kept in the feed room. It was a good sized, heavy sided wooden box with three compartments containing lift our trays inside where she did her eggs this way. Here's links to a couple of places that talk about this [link to www.oldandsold.com] [link to extension.missouri.edu] |
Phennommennonn (OP) Forum Administrator User ID: 759694 United States 08/30/2009 04:08 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | political correctness is a doctrine.... fostered by a delusional, illogical minority...... and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media; which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end. |
Phennommennonn (OP) Forum Administrator User ID: 759694 United States 08/30/2009 04:09 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | political correctness is a doctrine.... fostered by a delusional, illogical minority...... and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media; which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end. |
Phennommennonn (OP) Forum Administrator User ID: 759694 United States 08/30/2009 04:10 PM Report Abusive Post Report Copyright Violation | Last Edited by Phennommennonn on 08/30/2009 04:11 PM political correctness is a doctrine.... fostered by a delusional, illogical minority...... and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media; which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end. |