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GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!

 
Richard Strong
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User ID: 471457
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12/07/2009 02:03 PM
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GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
GLP Memo
FROM: Dick Strong,
TO: All GLP
DATE: October 1, 2008
RE: Gala Christmas Party

I'm happy to inform you that the GLP Christmas Party will take place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of drinks! We'll have a small band playing traditional carols... feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if our CEO shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be lit at 1:00 PM. Exchanges of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however, no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for everyone's pockets. This gathering is only for employees!
Our CEO will make a special announcement at that time!
Merry Christmas to you and your family, Dick

________________________________________

GLP Memo
FROM: Dick Strong,
TO: All GLP
DATE: October 2, 2008
RE: Gala Holiday Party

In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish employees. We recognize that Hanukkah is an important holiday, which often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year. However, from now on, we're calling it our "Holiday Party." The same policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians and to those still celebrating Reconciliation Day. There will be no Christmas tree and no Christmas carols will be sung. We will have other types of music for your enjoyment.
Happy now?
Happy Holidays to you and your family, Dick

________________________________________
GLP Memo
FROM: Dick Strong,
TO: All GLP
DATE: October 3, 2008
RE: Holiday Party

Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous requesting a non-drinking table, you didn't sign your name..
I'm happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table that reads, "AA Only", you wouldn't be anonymous anymore. How am I supposed to handle this?
Somebody? And sorry, but forget about the gift exchange, no gifts are allowed since the union members feel that $10.00 is too much money and the executives believe $10.00 is a little chintzy.

REMEMBER: NO GIFTS EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED. Dick

________________________________________

GLP Memo
FROM: Dick Strong,
To: All GLP
DATE: October 4, 2008
RE: Generic Holiday Party

What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December 20th begins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating and drinking during daylight hours. There goes the party! Seriously, we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs. Perhaps the Grill House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party or else package everything for you to take it home in little foil doggy baggy. Will that work?
Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit farthest from the dessert buffet, and pregnant women will get the table closest to the restrooms. Gays are allowed to sit with each other. Lesbians do not have to sit with Gay men, each group will have their own table.
Yes, there will be flower arrangement for the Gay men's table.
To the person asking permission to cross dress, the Grill House asks that no cross-dressing be allowed, apparently because of concerns about confusion in the restrooms. Sorry.
We will have booster seats for short people.
Low-fat food will be available for those on a diet.
I am sorry to report that we cannot control the amount of salt used in the food . The Grill House suggests that people with high blood pressure taste a bite first.
There will be fresh "low sugar" fruits as dessert for diabetics, but the restaurant cannot supply "no sugar" desserts. Sorry!

Did I miss anything?!?!?
Dick

________________________________________


GLP Memo
FROM: Dick Strong,
TO: All Fucking GLP
DATE: October 5, 2008
RE: The Fucking Holiday Party

I've had it with you vegetarian pricks!!! We're going to keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the "grill of death," as you so quaintly put it, and you'll get your f*%^ing salad bar, including organic tomatoes. But you know, tomatoes have feelings, too. They scream when you slice them. I've heard them scream. I'm hearing them scream right NOW!
The rest of you fucking wierdos can kiss my ass. I hope you all have a rotten holiday!
Drive drunk and die,
The Dick from Hell!!!

________________________________________

GLP Memo
FROM: Trinity, CEO
DATE: October 6, 2008
RE: Dick Strong and Holiday Party

I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Dick Strong a speedy recovery from his recent nervous breakdown and I'll continue to forward your cards to her at the asylum. In the meantime, management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party and give everyone the afternoon of the 23rd off with full pay.

Happy Whatever! Trinity

Last Edited by Richard Strong on 12/07/2009 02:30 PM
I am Richardus Strongus. Father to a murdered 'Refreshtard' thread, Husband to a deleted Top 10 thread. I will have my vengeance on the Lightworkers ..in this life or the next.
Only Me
Strawberry Girl

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12/07/2009 02:12 PM

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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
cute!
Here is where I look back.
Here is where you fell.
This is where I got up,
Shaking off my tail
This is where your rope trick
Started to look stale.
A greyhound pass for the boy in the well.

Bluebird

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12/07/2009 02:17 PM

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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
hf

Also reminds me of some of my family gatherings!
One of the most important aspects of conspiracy theories is being able to discern when there isn't one.

Oh yeah, like you'd understand anyway.

Where are we going and why am I in this handbasket?. . .J. Handy
Anonymous Coward
12/07/2009 02:20 PM
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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
lol
Anonymous Coward
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12/07/2009 02:27 PM
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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
chuckle

hf
_Storm_

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12/09/2009 11:34 AM
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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
lmao
Evil Twin

12/09/2009 11:41 AM
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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
LOL

Fuck that.

I say, "Merry Christmas to everyone, and you'll eat ham and you'll like it!"
Anonymous Coward
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12/09/2009 11:42 AM
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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
Aquarius 7

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12/09/2009 11:46 AM
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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
aq rofldg


. .
.

Cayce: “… The greater portion of Japan must go into the sea. …. then we may know it has begun …”. www.near-death.com/experiences/cayce11.html
.
"Be kind, for everyone you know is fighting a hard battle" - Plato
.
"Those who are at peace in their hearts already are in the Great Shelter of life." ~ Hopi Prophecy
.
BRIEF AND TO THE POINT

User ID: 381742
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12/09/2009 11:46 AM
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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
LOL

Fuck that.

I say, "Merry Christmas to everyone, and you'll eat ham and you'll like it!"
 Quoting: Evil Twin


OK, and drinks are on me. Fuck the cash bar...I'll pick up the tab. Enjoy
Poor people do poor people things, and rich people do rich people things.

You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity.

What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.

The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.

When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that my dear friend, is the beginning of the end of any nation.

You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it!

when you rob Paul to give to Peter ... ... ... you will always get Peters support!

:Brieffromnativea:
bed
Netizen Ribbonmind

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12/09/2009 11:47 AM

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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
Wraps gift for dick.
"The earth is mother of us all, for she is just; but you, because you are unjust have pretended that she is your mother alone; and if you do not stop, I will not permit you to remain upon her."

[link to www.livius.org]
Chawlee

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12/09/2009 11:47 AM
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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
I was so looking forward to that $10 present.
mopar28m

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12/09/2009 11:49 AM

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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
Ramadan was in September this year.
vaccinefreehealth.spam

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Racin​g to end vaccinations.
Celtic (Pictavian)

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12/09/2009 11:50 AM

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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
ana
It is the Thunderbolt that steers the Universe
- Heraclitus
Anonymous Coward
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12/09/2009 11:50 AM
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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
..........and you'll celebrate CHRISTMAS, not winterval, happy holidays or any other pc bollox. It's CHRISTMAS, get it? CHRISTMAS.

AND YOU WILL ENJOY IT.

The managment.
nanuke

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12/09/2009 12:37 PM
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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
hehehe...this was an awesome thread!
~you are love
~the key...it's almost time.

!poke the bulge!

~here is my hand...it can be closed like a fist...or open to hold...yet it is still my hand.
~Today is cancelled...due to lack of interest.
~Without order nothing exists. Without chaos nothing evolves.

ac 618285:
~"without both order and chaos, the illusion would not be able to continue.
one day in the far away future, order will submit to chaos and the entire illusion will vanish."
--------------------------------
:nan1:
SubarcticBeef

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12/09/2009 12:40 PM
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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
I show up. Eat all the food. Leave with all the ladies. Sounds good to me.
Large and Powerful
[link to i154.photobucket.com]
mopar28m

User ID: 729526
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12/09/2009 12:43 PM

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Re: GLP's Christmas party....in a nutshell!
I show up. Eat all the food. Leave with all the ladies. Sounds good to me.
 Quoting: SubarcticBeef

nopig
vaccinefreehealth.spam

vaccinefreehealth@hushmail.com

Racin​g to end vaccinations.

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